Sir Apropos of Nothing (Sir Apropos of Nothing, #1)

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Sir Apropos of Nothing (Sir Apropos of Nothing #1)

3.72 of 5 stars 3.72 · rating details · 994 ratings · 83 reviews

They were dark and stormy knights...and when they had their way with a helpless tavern wench one terrible evening, they had no idea that the result of that twilight brutality was going to come after them years later looking to settle the score...The "result's" unlikely name is Apropos: A rogue, a rascal, a scoundrel, a cheat...and those are his good points. Lame of leg but...more They were dark and stormy knights...and when they had their way with a helpless tavern wench one terrible evening, they had no idea that the result of that twilight brutality was going to come after them years later looking to settle the score...The "result's" unlikely name is Apropos: A rogue, a rascal, a scoundrel, a cheat...and those are his good points. Lame of leg but fast of wit, the only reason Apropos doesn't consider chivalry dead is because he's not yet through with it. Herewith, Sir Apropos of Nothing -- his story in the words of the knave himself.

Apropos, all too aware of his violent and unseemly beginnings, travels to the court of the good King Runcible, with three goals in mind: to find his father, seek retribution, and line his own pockets. However, Apropos carries the most troublesome burden a would-be harbinger of chaos can bear: He may well be a hero foretold, a young man of destiny. It is not a notion that Apropos finds palatable, having very low regard for such notions as honor, selflessness, or risking one's neck. Yet when Apropos finds himself assigned as squire to the most senile knight in the court -- Sir Umbrage of the Flaming Nether Regions, whose squires tend to have a rather short life span -- Apropos is forced to rise to the occasion lest he be dragged under -- permanently.

His difficulties are compounded when a routine mission to escort the King's daughter home after a long absence goes horribly awry. Suddenly Apropos finds himself saddled with trying to survive while dealing with a berserk phoenix, murderous unicorns, mutated harpies, homicidal warrior kings, and -- most problematic of all -- a princess who may or may not be a psychotic arsonist.

Featuring a hero cut from cloth similar to that of such entertaining blackguards as Blackadder and Flashman, Sir Apropos of Nothing is a skewed version of classic, mythic adventure that is by turns hilarious and frightening, slapstick and serious, and filled with drop-dead laughs and drop-dead people.(less)

Paperback, 672 pages

Published June 25th 2002 by Pocket Books (first published July 2001)

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Jan 17, 2009 Kait rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Jon, Hanna

Shelves: fantasy, humour

I enjoyed this book because it was very clever. I enjoyed the puns and the humour in the language. I thought that what Apropos did wasn't nice or kind in anyway, but there was character growth and it definitely kept things interesting. I've never read a book about an anti-hero before (well, not quite like this one!) so it was a wonderful change of pace.

There is some sex in it, but it's not smutty. There is some violence in it, but it's not gory. It's fairly middle of the road as far as objectio...more

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Dec 23, 2008 Kate rated it 2 of 5 stars

I'm afraid my review is a bit biased: the writing of the story is brilliant, the originality of it is both incredibly bold and astonishingly fresh. I just say that I loathe the book for the disgusting taste the main character left in my mouth when I was through with the book. I don't mind an anti-hero, I don't mind flawed heroes. I DO mind books with characters that lack a moral center, and revel in anger, revenge, and jealousy...when all of these emotions are aimed at friends and people who hel...more

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May 27, 2013 BCMUnlimited rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2013

See official review: http://www.bookscompletemeunlimited.c...

Peter David is one of my Mom's favorite authors, and she's the one who originally gave me Sir Apropos of Nothing to read since she thought I'd enjoy it. She was right, because I ended up loving this book more than even she did.

As for the positives, pretty much everything. The characters that David creates are all different enough that their interactions kept me turning page after page, going back to read some of my favorite scenes ove...more See official review: http://www.bookscompletemeunlimited.c...

Peter David is one of my Mom's favorite authors, and she's the one who originally gave me Sir Apropos of Nothing to read since she thought I'd enjoy it. She was right, because I ended up loving this book more than even she did.

As for the positives, pretty much everything. The characters that David creates are all different enough that their interactions kept me turning page after page, going back to read some of my favorite scenes over again. Apropos, the main character, is everything that a hero isn't supposed to be, since frankly, he's only concerned with self-preservation during the majority of the book. However, there are moments where he seems to believe that just maybe, it was his destiny the whole time. Tacit on the other hand, is your typical optimistic hero with an over-inflated ego (note, heroes like that tend to bug me) and at the very thought that someone else could steal what he believed to be his rightful destiny, he...well, got ticked. Ah, yes, and then the ladies, Sharee and Entipy. Though to be honest, Sharee doesn't particularly feature in this book until later but I adore her anyway. Entipy's just fun, even if she is a little psychotic, it's great to see what crazy stunt she's going to pull next. Let's just leave it with those four characters, though I have opinions on every single character. I love most of them, even the ones that I don't like, I wouldn't have wanted them to leave the story because they only increased the overall enjoyment.

Story wise, I can't help but to applaud Peter David for writing such an amazing book. It brings in so many cliches from stories of "Hero beats adversity, hero meets legendary creatures, saves girl, gets happy every after, etc" and completely twists them around into a story focused on a man who thought, just maybe, he was going to get a shot at being the hero of a story. The conflicts within the narrative seem to layer on top of each other, as Apropos works through each obstacle thrown at him, with his customary train of thought, "Does staying help me or would it be better to flee?".

I've skipped over negatives for now, because honestly, I can't think of anything I really disliked about the book. I love every moment of reading it, and it will most likely stay on my "most likely to read" list when I want something fun to occupy a couple hours. There are two more books in the Apropos series: "Woad to Wuin" and "Tong Lashing". Expect reviews on those to follow sometime soon!

(less)

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Mar 18, 2013 Keith rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Note that (despite what Goodreads seems to think), this is NOT the first novel in the series. It is, rather, a collected edition of the comic book series, which essentially pick up the storyline after the events of book #3 (Tong Lashing), Further, the correct title should be GYPSIES, VAMPS AND THIEVES. Still, this is what comes up when I put the ISBN in, so I don't know what to do to separate this from the original novel in people's lists. At least the plot synopsis above is right.

With all that...more

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Dec 05, 2011 Jilly rated it 2 of 5 stars

Well, originally I had read an excerpt from the book and was very much interested in reading it. Of course, being a big Peter David fan to begin with couldn’t have helped that decision along. Of course not. Anyways, I was a little excited to finally be able to read it. Then I started it.

It wasn’t bad, it was just boring. It is told in the first person which I tend to prefer but at the same time it was rather cynical and seemed to take forever to actually get to the story.

As time went on though,...more

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Mar 19, 2011 Sherwood Smith added it · review of another edition

Shelves: fantasy

Terry Pratchett and Diana Wynne Jones are known for how they brilliantly send up well-worn fantasy cliches. Peter David, in this fantasy about a limping base-born boy who is in a rage at an unfair world, also sends up a bunch of fantasy tropes, including some funny twists on common terms that get reinvented (The Harpies Bizarre being one of the most, er, compelling); but the humor is uncomfortably juxtaposed against some really ugly stuff. Heroes do horrible things, including the main character....more

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Oct 19, 2009 Sean Randall rated it 5 of 5 stars

It's been almost three weeks since I had the time or inclination to pick up a novel. I don't exactly know why I've struggled to read lately, but getting back into the literary arts was certainly something on my agenda. And with what a title to start...

"there's nothing like seeing twenty armed men arriving too late to do anything about a disaster that truly stirs the heart to bursting with emotion."

That's the entire ambiance of this novel. Every joke, gibe, jape and jest appears to be one thing b...more It's been almost three weeks since I had the time or inclination to pick up a novel. I don't exactly know why I've struggled to read lately, but getting back into the literary arts was certainly something on my agenda. And with what a title to start...

"there's nothing like seeing twenty armed men arriving too late to do anything about a disaster that truly stirs the heart to bursting with emotion."

That's the entire ambiance of this novel. Every joke, gibe, jape and jest appears to be one thing but turns out to be something utterly different. Even the characters break the mould.

"I am by trade neither writer nor historian; I am merely a master of fabrication, which I am told is all one requires to take up either of the aforementioned pursuits."

So says Apropos, hero, narrator, look-out of his own fait and nothing else. Apropos is quite a messed-up guy, and his chronicled adventures in this novel kept me highly entertained from start to finish. the language is so well used that it's almost impossible to imagine things going any other way, but it doesn't stop there. the environs and universe in which the novel is set is by no means done in sweeping grandeur, but we get enough detail to know what's going on at any time.

characterisation, dialog and pithy insight make the novel a cut above anything I've read for a while, and it's great fun to read - one feels as if one is peering over Apropos' shoulder and peeking into his hapless misfortunes.

"It was disconcerting to realize that I was in agreement with someone whom I considered to be only slightly smarter than a mushroom I'd just mashed beneath my foot."

Apropos himself is hardly the sort of hero one wants to feel kinship with - in fact, I can hardly stand him, as a person. Although he is generally true to his ethos, and there's something to be said for that - he's also a first rate top-class egoist. as much as I may dislike him, though, the twists, turns and surprises thrown at me throughout this book made me utterly unable to put it down. I hate apropos, but I love reading about him, and so there's no doubt I intend to stuff a sock in my mouth to stop myself from laughing, and go pick up the next book in the hopes that the story is continued with accustomed aplomb. (less)

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Jan 16, 2013 Jen rated it 3 of 5 stars

Here's the thing: I give this three stars because I honestly don't know what I feel about it, and that seems like a good middle ground.
The thing about Peter David's antihero Apropos is that he is indeed an antihero. In fact, he takes antiheroism to the Nth degree. He makes an art form out of antiheroism. On the one hand, that's awesome, and bold, and brilliant, and creative, and very well done. On the other, I hated everyone in this book pretty much all the time. This makes reading a book rather...more Here's the thing: I give this three stars because I honestly don't know what I feel about it, and that seems like a good middle ground.
The thing about Peter David's antihero Apropos is that he is indeed an antihero. In fact, he takes antiheroism to the Nth degree. He makes an art form out of antiheroism. On the one hand, that's awesome, and bold, and brilliant, and creative, and very well done. On the other, I hated everyone in this book pretty much all the time. This makes reading a book rather difficult.
The first half of the book is backstory, and it admits it's backstory--one of the things I didn't like about this was how often Apropos (as narrator) breaks the fourth wall, and not for funny things, but to just check in with the reader and make sure you're still there. And it's not fun backstory; for all the fact that there's a lot of snide and often subtle humor in this book, there's a whole lot of violence and anger and ugliness, too. And Apropos pulls no punches (although I have no idea how he would have come by most of the details he so willingly imparts to us; didn't buy the near-omniscient narrator thing), because he's even angrier about it than you are. Mostly. If it doesn't cost him too much to be so.
So it's not until the second half of the book (which isn't short) that the characters become anything other than Disney-gone-to-jail-and-shanked-a-few-times. And even then, they're still that, but in a you-can't-help-having-a-hero kind of way. So there are some really good moments. But then, because there's a sequel, it all goes to hell. (Spoiler alert.)
So the book is clever. And there are some great wordplays and other assorted jokes thrown in that I really appreciated. I like how David plays with--consciously--the hero narrative, and the idea of narratives, and what happens when the plan gets shirked. But I think he took it too far, and lost me in that bonding moment with the characters in which I was about as happy as the phoenix to be yanked along on this grumpy accident of an adventure.(less)

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Jan 09, 2010 Jimyanni rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: fantasy, humor

This book was based on a highly amusing basic premise, that of a main character who is something of an antihero: he's not of noble birth (other than being a noble bastard), he's not brave, honorable, a mighty warrior, etc, etc, etc, but is rather self-centered, cowardly, cynical, and lame, but manages to get himself into the world of knights & nobility anyway. As I say, an amusing concept, but one which started to wear thin after a while. I was going to give the book a poor rating as a resul...more

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Aug 21, 2009 Susan rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: droids-n-dragons, genre-sff

I don't know what my feelings are on rating a book I haven't finished. But I have realized that I will never rate any book I have finished 1 star because I don't finish books that are that bad.

So, let's use a little simile. When I was 14, I had a best friend, and my best friend and I wrote novels like crazy. We were our only readers. My best friend's primary character was a down-on-his luck, cast off, cynical royal who had left the castle go adventuring. The intro quote to her first novel about...more

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Sep 21, 2010 Eric Franks rated it 4 of 5 stars

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.

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May 19, 2009 Tim rated it 2 of 5 stars

Somebody recommended this book to me, comparing the Sir Apropos of Nothing series to Douglas Adams' humor in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. That just set me up for disappointment. Peter David, though a good author with an able wit about him, is nowhere as intelligently ludicrous as Mr. Adams. And, unfortunately, his protagonist isn't a lovable bumbling hero like Arthur Dent ... Apropos is a self-serving weasel who happens to be so "unlucky" that his selfish actions backfire and result in...more

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Sep 14, 2008 Heather rated it 2 of 5 stars

The main character is an ass and unfortuntely, he fails to be an ass in that smart-aleck, secretly kind-hearted way that some anti-heros manage to pull off so well. Bottom line: a book about an ass. Thank you Peter David. Because I don't have to deal with enough asses on a day-to-day basis. *rolls eyes*

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Feb 15, 2010 Elizabeth rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: fantasy, favorites

I'm not quite sure how to classify this book. It has so many different elements! I mean, its a fantasy, for sure. And it's funny, very funny. And yet, it isn't typical to any genre I've ever read.

Apropos of Nothing is the perfect anti-hero. He looks out for number one, first and formost. Actually, I'll go further than that. He really doesn't care about anyone else, except for his mother. Damsels in distress? Don't call on Apropos!

Apropos is the son of a whore. Begot by rape, one night, by kni...more I'm not quite sure how to classify this book. It has so many different elements! I mean, its a fantasy, for sure. And it's funny, very funny. And yet, it isn't typical to any genre I've ever read.

Apropos of Nothing is the perfect anti-hero. He looks out for number one, first and formost. Actually, I'll go further than that. He really doesn't care about anyone else, except for his mother. Damsels in distress? Don't call on Apropos!

Apropos is the son of a whore. Begot by rape, one night, by knights. He is raised in an inn, where his mother worked, by day and night. As he grows up, he realizes just how discontent he is with life in general.

His adventures include a would-be hero, a mad King, a not mad King, a dreaded War-lord, a berserk phoenix, a possibly psychotic princess, and crazy unicorns...all of which he endures most unwillingly.

Here is a favorite passage, from the very beginning of the book:

As I stood there with the sword in my hand, the blade dripping blood on the floor, I couldn't help but wonder if the blood belonged to my father.
The entire thing had happened so quickly that I wasn't quite sure how to react. Part of me wanted to laugh, but most of me fairly cringed at what had just occurred. I didn't do particularly well with blood. This tended to be something of a hardship for one endeavoring to become a knight, dedicated to serving good King Runcible of Isteria, a ruler who more often than not had his heart in the right place.
The recently slain knight also had his heart in the right place. This had turned out to be something of an inconvenience for him. After all, if his heart had been in the wrong place, then the sword wouldn't have pierced it through, and he wouldn't be dead, and I wouldn't have been in such a fix.

This sets the tone for the whole novel. Peter David is probably the wittiest author that I have ever had the pleasure of reading, and I cannot wait to get my hands on the next book in the trilogy about Sir Apropos, of Nothing.(less)

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Dec 01, 2008 Eric rated it 1 of 5 stars

I read to page 94 of this book (out of 647). I didn't like the writing style. It seemed incohesive and jumbled. There were a lot of over-used cliches. And the main character seemed to have "I was there" first-hand knowledge of events that happened before he was even born. Please.

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Jul 06, 2010 Libby rated it 1 of 5 stars

An acquaintance told me that I should read this author's books because I love to laugh. So I read this book, and I was deeply disappointed. Not only did I not laugh, but I found the main character repellent. He went crunching his way through a rather nice fantasy world, trashing everything he touched, totally uncaring and utterly self-centered. When the author tried to introduce nobler elements to his character, I found the transition feeble and unbelievable. Before I finished the book, I was ma...more

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Nov 19, 2012 Matt Horowitz rated it 5 of 5 stars

I first discovered Peter David as a reader of the Star Trek novels. Indeed, he wrote one of the best Worf stories I've ever read. After that I began following his comic stuff & it was a pleasure to start reading his novel work. Sir Apropos is everything a knight is not but he has that plucky survivor's spirit that I love in characters. The book accurately represents Peter David's twisted sense of humor but also combines it with a nasty streak that makes it even funnier (in a sad, whincing so...more

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Jul 15, 2007 Alita rated it 2 of 5 stars

I may pick up another Peter David novel in the future, but don't let's hold our breath, ok?

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May 25, 2013 Preston rated it 4 of 5 stars

Well this book was highly entertaining. A fantasy satire, it presents the protagonist as somewhat of an anti-hero you can't help but like and dislike at the same time as he takes the most practical and cynical approach to life's obstacles.

I found that I could relate to the main character Apropos because he mostly utilizes inner monologue to express his wit and as many of my close friends can attest to I am inclined to randomly grin or chuckle at a passing thought I have and by the time I want t...more

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May 05, 2009 Pandora rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: adult

I picked this book up while looking at the shelves for Charles Dickens' Great Expections. I always liked Peter David's Star Trek books and this story looked liked a fun read. Which it turned out to be.

It is unlikely that Apropos could be a hero. He is lame of leg, the son of a whore, doesn't believe in noblity, and is only intrested in himself. Qualities that might make him a villian. Fate and mother though have other ideas.

This was a great book. At times very funny but, also very real as Aprop...more

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Oct 28, 2007 Alexey rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: reviewed

Originality - this is what you start looking for, when you see dozens of new books published, virtually indistinguishable from each other. And this book has it in abundance.

Is it simple to find another lame, cynical scoundrel as a protagonist of a fantasy novel? And it's not that he grows out of it to become another run-of-the-mill prince charming - he stays consistent for the length of the trilogy. He is a hero out of necessity not choice, and if by saving his own skin he can save the world - w...more

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Sep 06, 2007 Tracey rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: fans of fantasy with a sense of humour about the genre

Shelves: no-longer-owned

A recommendation from danniangel & mousme, as well as Fenris from the SDMB/UB, I picked up a used copy of Sir Apropos of Nothing a month or so ago & started reading it over the weekend.

The book starts in media res, with Apropos caught cuckolding a knight; as a squire, this is definitely not recommended as a career move. He escapes through luck and a quick wit, then proceeds to fill us in on his background. The bastard son of a whore, born with a lame leg, his childhood was as mean and cr...more

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Oct 30, 2012 Peggy rated it 3 of 5 stars

I love satire, and I like Peter David's Star Trek novels, so I was fairly sure I would enjoy this book. Apropos is the definition of anti-hero; he has no idea what he's doing, and life keeps flinging challenges at him for him to fail at. But somehow he mucks through, and he's alive to face another adventure. It was fun, but I wouldn't recommend it to kids. Too adult. And I'm not going to read the sequels, because there are too many other great books out there to read. Unless someone gives me a f...more

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Jan 18, 2011 Jenny rated it 3 of 5 stars

truly not sure what to think of this book. an adult book with adult themes and cruelty, but nothing blatant or rude. a young man conceived through gang rape and born with a lame leg so his view of the world is crooked and he acts upon those feelings and doesn't alway choose the right. and yet, he's making choices the best he can. he does the right thing most of the time, but always for selfish reasons. thought provoking. also very sarcastic!

very much "rosencrantz and gildenstern are dead" type.

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Jul 02, 2009 Celeste rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: fantasy

This book is terribly written. You know the old adage "show, don't tell?" Apparently nobody told Peter David. The book reads as if he had no idea where the story was going and just made things up as he went along, things work out too conveniently and the characters are not very likeable. I'd planned on giving this book one star, but in the end it was kind of entertaining and to be honest I would consider reading the sequels if I came across them for free and wanted a mindless read.

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Aug 15, 2009 Julie rated it 2 of 5 stars Recommends it for: not sure I'd recommend it

Recommended to Julie by: saw it in the bookstore, or something

Shelves: fantasy

I read this a while back and sort of forgot about it (or maybe I put it out of my head). What drew me to this book immediately was the punnish title (having been a big fan of Xanth) but when I actually got into the book, the premise was sort of off-putting. The end was just..... ew.

I never did read any of the others in this series and I'm not sure who I'd recommend this to. Maybe someone with a fairly twisted sense of humor.

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Aug 04, 2011 Falina rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This was a fun book, stupid but in a good way. I stayed up half the night to finish it, and more than once I burst out laughing. Basically, it's about a guy who lies, cheats, and steals his way to inadvertent glory. It made me think about what a hero really is, what a hero should be, and whether we need heroes at all. I'm considering ordering the next two books.

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Jan 29, 2013 Jennifer rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: fantasy, medieval, humor

I have mixed feelings about this series. I liked some the humor making fun of the traditional fantasy tropes but sometimes it felt more disgusting than funny, too far over the line for me and it just gets worse as the series goes on. I can't recomend it unless you have a higher tolerace for inapporiate humor than I do (and lots of people do).

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Aug 17, 2011 Nepeta Thompson rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: favorites

I think Apropos has just become my favorite character, ever. I love his pragmatism, and his refusal to be blind to the hypocrisy of his society. I liked that he's a hero who looks after his own skin first, rather than throwing his life away for meaningless heroics...although he does change over the course of the story, and at the end he chooses to help the people he cares about regardless of the cost to himself.

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May 19, 2010 Jeffrey rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: fantasy, satire, read-in-2010

An enjoyable (not at all) little satire of the typical heroic fantasy novel. Filled with the usual amount of contemporaneous puns and crass jokes one would expect. Not at all deep, but not intending to be either. I'll definitely try the sequel, The Woad to Wuin.

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About Peter David

aka David Peters

Peter Allen David (often abbreviated PAD) is an American writer, best known for his work in comic books and Star Trek novels. David often jokingly describes his occupation as "Writer of Stuff". David is noted for his prolific writing, characterized by its mingling of real world issues with humor and references to popular culture. He also uses metafiction frequently, usually to humo...more

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Q-In-Law (Star Trek: The Next Generation, #18)

Vendetta: The Giant Novel (Star Trek: The Next Generation)

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Quotes from Sir Apropos of Nothing

“As for Madelyne, she continued to ply her trade. But such a life takes a fast toll on a woman. It is easy to be a remote, untouchable beauty and stay that way for many, many years. And if a stunning tapestry is hung upon a wall, it remains unsullied and a work of art. However, if one drapes it across the floor of a pub and all manner of men tread upon it with their heavy boots, it's going to be worn rather thin, and rather quickly. Such was the case with my mother.” — 1 person liked it

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Sir Apropos of Nothing (Sir Apropos of Nothing #1)

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