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The Modern Gentleman: A Guide to Essential Manners, Savvy and Vice
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The Modern Gentleman: A Guide to Essential Manners, Savvy and Vice

3.86 of 5 stars 3.86  ·  rating details  ·  256 ratings  ·  39 reviews
THE MODERN GENTLEMAN is a visually stimulating, rib-tickling, thought-provoking sourcebook of manners and mischief for the 21st-century male. The book offers a panoramic snapshot of the gentleman: witty and poignant, traditional but spontaneous, flirtatious yet courting. Discussions range from the classic (Motoring, Oenophilia) and serious (Secrets & Lies, The Good Hus...more
Paperback, 341 pages
Published August 27th 2002 by Ten Speed Press
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Aspry  Jones
"Tuxedoed guests deserve cocktails in stems and highballs. A martini in a plastic cup is not a drink. Steer a raucus bunch away from the crystal and don't place a sippy cup in an enchanting lady's manicured hand."

That's one of two things wrong with this book. The first, as shown above, is that too often do the authors write to see their own words. Contrary to what they believe, it's not good writing when you use three full sentences just to say "use the good stuff at a fancy event." For that mat...more
Oct 08, 2007 Piotr rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: my children, my children's children
Thank you baby-boomers, for completely fucking up any progress you made towards social liberation in the 60s. Now you're all divorced and addicted to benzodiazepenes, your kids hate you and you need a Prius plus a loft on 20th and Florida to ease the cognitive dissonance generated by the fact you sold out and will die very, very soon. Scary innit?

Nah, but I got love. All I'm saying is us post-generation X'ers have to start all over again to define a rebellious generation. We grew up on ritalin,...more
A bit tongue in cheek, this little primer is a good collection of tidbit information for those who wish to round out their conversational skills. It does not inform on any given subject exhaustively, nor does it claim to.

Part I: The Gregarious Gentleman is okay in its attempt to humorously engage relationship topics like Group Dynamics, The Active Table and various stages of an intimate relationship.

The better strength coming in Part II: The Inner Gentleman. Here we find enough details and info...more
Phineas Mollod and Jason Tesauro masterly craft a pocket guidebook for those needing swift kick in the ascot. 329 pages concerning proper gentlemanly protocol on a variety of topics: entertaining, meeting the parents and flaskmanship; just to name a few. While not a definitive code of conduct, Mollod and Tesauro cover enough bases to make any Bush League Hooligan into a presentable Major League Player.

While extremely enjoyable, The Modern Gentleman is more than just a light read. Due to quick w...more
ah, men are pigs. not just in that chauvenistic way, but relating more to the fact that there are quite a few schlubs out there. yeah, you know who you are. this book is for you.

being only semi-schlubby, i thought the book touched on some points that i had, in fact, considered, but never really resolved in matters relating to etiquette & refinement. but it goes beyond that-what booze goes best in a flask, seating order at dinner parties, the proper orchestration of dating multiple
Marinus Uys
trully brilliant funny read, tackling what most parentals omitted. I real hoot to re - visit.
Oh Mr. Tesauro (and Mr. Mollod, even though I don't know you), your wit with words is without comparison. Each sentence, each phrase, each syllable — all so dense with meaning and insight I can't take it.

I was hoping to fly through this book, but I keep finding myself pausing to take a moment of pleasure and reflection on such lines as "When necessary, keep it quiet, fun and light on the libido; chicken fights are more efficient without the hydrodynamic drag of an uninvited erection" [advice on...more
Sep 25, 2014 Alan marked it as did-not-finish
God help anyone who consults this book in the hopes of gleaning actual advice about how to be a gentleman.
Jason Yang
This is the book of advice your dad gave you - if your dad was James Bond. Highly entertaining, Phineas and Tesauro offer portraits of gentlemanly charm. Chivalry is indeed not dead and the advice given here is thematically classic. As with all advice, it is important to use discretion and not apply these tips blindly. Still, this guide here will indeed make for a savvy lifestyle and some colorful stories.
Overall I thought it was a good book with some interesting and insightful points and thoughts. Not all of it was applicable and not everything I absolutely agreed with, but I think it was interesting to be shown a different perspective to a altered lifestyle. I will attempt to employ some of the techniques and will definitely follow up on many of the book, music and drink recommendations.
An essential reference to being a gentleman. We all need some help here. Covers all topics imaginable, literally 100's of useful tidbits concerning modern etiquette.

Example concerning flaskmanship: When is it appropriate to carry a flask? Guideline: Whenever you're wearing a sport jacket, otherwise you are under dressed.
Kyle Klymchuk
Maybe a little overly biased on certain apparel opinions but this book is exactly what it claims to be: An essential guide to manners, savvy and vice. For that, I'll give it 5 stars with the included consideration that Mollod and Tesauro wield 2 very powerful lexicons. A good read for the up-and-coming man in his 20s.
A tongue in cheek primer on how to be a gentleman in the 21st century. The authors intently posit every conceivable SAT-styled word into the text in order to seem overtly wordy, with mixed results. The sections on the Inner Gentleman and social dynamics are worth the read, along with solid musical recommendations.
Aug 16, 2007 Kara rated it 4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: Anyone interested in poise and etiquette - male or female
Cute book - all you need to know about how to be a proper gentleman. It's sort of like one of those "Survivors Handbooks", but with a bit more wit and a lot more sophistication. I'm a girl and I still liked reading through it! If anything, it gave me a good idea of what I should come to expect out of a man. ;)
Chris Royster
Oct 09, 2007 Chris Royster rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: Men
If chivalry and sophistication are a rarity amongst the modern cat,this book is the remedy!I read this book about 4 years ago.I gave my copy to a younger guy that would always ask me for advice on style and women and how to be original.Then I had to buy another copy asap!My bible!
Legacy Dad
This is a great little tongue in cheek guide for the modern man or young man to learn a few basic life principles and a whole lot of culture. Superbly written with great use of the English language. I'd recommend this to all Bachelors, guys in college and 20 something’s.
Patrick Higgins
These are good bases for modern manners and the reasoning of why they are important. I find myself understanding more conventional roles men are supposed to play in society. Interesting. I agree with most, but not all aspects of their descriptions of the modern gentleman.
Rachel Popham
Aug 08, 2008 Rachel Popham rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: like everyone, ever.
Recommended to Rachel by: Dave Corun
Exactly what the title says, only with extra awesomeness, savor, and panache. Everything from seating arrangements to gift and lit guides to threesome etiquette. And did I mention: Awesome! A must-have for any aspiring 20- or 30-something.
Jan 14, 2008 Michael rated it 2 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: dudes

Although it's a reference, it reads like anyother book. It's pretty funny. I used it like I do GQ: I may not follow it all, but you gotta know the rules before you break them. These days, a semi-gentleman is the best your gonna get.
Duke DeLaet
Hilarious! It's like a couple of English scholars had nothing better to do than to come up with the most complicated puns they could think of and jam them all into a book. Super entertaining, and I learned quite a bit about cocktails.

Less kitschy than its sequel, making it that much more readable without gagging. Some clever turns of phrase. Some wit, but not as witty as they think they are. Many drink recipes, still with no measurements/proportions.
Highlights include whether Fred from Scooby Doo is wearing a cravat or an ascot (a cravat), a random drink recipe footnoted for every occasion, and acceptable types of gatecrashing. Amusingly written.
The voice of the author drove me away, I'm sorry to say. It reads like an ancient ettiqite book and is just as dragging to get through. Tried to read it three times and kept putting it away to try again later.
Gothicbunny Groves
Loved all the witty statements in the book which made me laugh quite a few times. The chapters titled 'Gentlemanly Knowledge' and 'Venerable Vices: Alcohol, Tobacco, & Fireworks' interested me the most.
Need lessons on how to be a classy gent? This is the book for you. It offers tips on how to be classy on numerous activities such as skinny dipping, tipping, and even crashing a party.

Sep 25, 2007 Barry rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: 1960.
Well apparently there are other guys out there who say swell, like sweaters and have a cocktail because not only is it refreshing in that deaden your senses way but it looks cool.
I didn't agree with everything they advocate, but there is some good advice for dealing with situations the modern gentleman finds himself in.
A hilarious, practical, and learned guide to being a real man....Not for meatheads, but instead for thoughtful, fun, and intelligent gentlemen.
Mar 14, 2007 Alexander rated it 3 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: gentlemen
Shelves: lame-but-true
Strong humor, mild misogyny, and a clean pair of socks - all you need to steal any moment. The world is yours young thug, the world is yours.
Mar 04, 2009 Joe is currently reading it
So far I think the author is gay, mention of how to where your ascot, but a good mix of humor and helpful hints on conduct and the like.
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