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43rd out of 52 books
—
9 voters
A Life's Work: On Becoming a Mother
by
Rachel Cusk
The experience of motherhood is an experience in contradiction. It is commonplace and it is impossible to imagine. It is prosaic and it is mysterious. It is at once banal, bizarre, compelling, tedious, comic, and catastrophic. To become a mother is to become the chief actor in a drama of human existence to which no one turns up. It is the process by which an ordinary life...more
Paperback, 228 pages
Published
March 1st 2003
by Picador
(first published January 1st 2002)
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This is the most beautiful and the most honest book about pregnancy and motherhood that I have read. At nearly every pass I found myself saying, "Yes, exactly, that's it precisely."
Cusk describes the condition and the character of motherhood with candor and vision and clarity; it's like reading some long-forgotten Virginia Woolf novel, with every predicament of motherhood more carefully revealed than you would have thought possible, and those moments presented with such immediacy and such a sen...more
Cusk describes the condition and the character of motherhood with candor and vision and clarity; it's like reading some long-forgotten Virginia Woolf novel, with every predicament of motherhood more carefully revealed than you would have thought possible, and those moments presented with such immediacy and such a sen...more
I loved this book! I’ll be honest – I didn’t expect to, and only searched for it in the library after hearing it had sparked some controversial reviews, thinking it would inspire much ranting. But I found myself enjoying it so much I finished it in less than a day. Something in this memoir of Rachel Cusk’s first year of motherhood resonated deeply within me, despite the fact I didn’t agree with a lot of her opinions – which is testament to how beautifully written it is, and how fundamentally lif...more
Since becoming a mother I have read countless memoirs of motherhood. Some are funny, some are literary, some are candid. Pretty much all of them are trite. I have read some that I loved, but never one I could relate to closely. This, finally, is that book.
Rachel Cusk explains in her introduction that they moved out of London and her husband took care of their children while she wrote this book. To her and her husband I say, every minute of that time was worth this product. Cusk manages to descr...more
Rachel Cusk explains in her introduction that they moved out of London and her husband took care of their children while she wrote this book. To her and her husband I say, every minute of that time was worth this product. Cusk manages to descr...more
Drawn by its subversive sepia cover, I plucked this memoir off a bookstore shelf during pregnancy because frankly, all the pink books with pictures of smiling mothers and babies were enough to provoke the baby blues before even giving birth! Cusk’s two young daughters are rolled into one anonymous being to protect their privacy in the book, in which Cusk recounts personal anecdotes of new motherhood in glorious detail.
Rachel Cusk’s story lived up to its cover promise of being ‘as compulsive as a...more
Rachel Cusk’s story lived up to its cover promise of being ‘as compulsive as a...more
There are so many 'celebrity baby books' out there, none of which I would touch with a barge pole, with their soft-focus vomit-inducing coochie-coochie-coo. I don't even fancy those matey ones that slap their thighs, wink and hoot 'What am I like....' whilst recounting a string of sanitised 'parenting fail' moments. This is different. This one looks you in the eye with a dangerously frank expression and says 'no, I really am crap at parenting'.
Clearly pregnancy did not addle Ms Cusk's brain. I w...more
Clearly pregnancy did not addle Ms Cusk's brain. I w...more
The truth is, it's rough having a baby. I love him -- but regardless of how I love him, and no matter how much people say your love for him will make it so you love doing laundry, changing dirty diapers and pacing the floor at night -- I HATE doing laundry, changing dirty diapers and pacing the floor at night. I hate that I do those things 90% of the time I'm awake, and gone gone gone are my moments to sleep or to read or to enjoy television or eat dinner without someone screaming and putting th...more
"Motherhood; and it is with a shock I see, like a plummeting stock market, the resulting plunge in my own significance."
This is a marvellous description of living with a new baby. On form she has wonderful images: At the clinic, she says, "The babies boil like a row of angry kettles." And
"Every time she cries, my breasts appear like prison warders investigating a disturbance, two dumb, moon-faced henchmen closing in on her, silencing her, administering opiates."
And:
"On tube trains people tut a...more
This is a marvellous description of living with a new baby. On form she has wonderful images: At the clinic, she says, "The babies boil like a row of angry kettles." And
"Every time she cries, my breasts appear like prison warders investigating a disturbance, two dumb, moon-faced henchmen closing in on her, silencing her, administering opiates."
And:
"On tube trains people tut a...more
After seeing this refered to as 'contraversial' in more than one (american) baby book I had the misfortune to browse through during my pregnancy, it stuck in the back of my mind to eventually get round to reading it. Don't understand what all the fuss is about, it is an honest well written account of that fog and confusion that comes with becoming a mother and dealing with those early months of worries, breastfeeding, lack of sleep and most of all the loss of self. Its not sentimental or dramati...more
I can't believe this provoked anger and outrage at its publication and it saddens me that Cusk felt she had to explain and justify her writing of it in the introduction to this later edition.
She writes with unflinching honesty about the hyperreality of early motherhood. Of COURSE it's self-obsessed: this is the most all-consuming love you've ever experienced. But it's not an equal partnership. In the early days, the object of your love depends on you absolutely, and every expression of displeasu...more
She writes with unflinching honesty about the hyperreality of early motherhood. Of COURSE it's self-obsessed: this is the most all-consuming love you've ever experienced. But it's not an equal partnership. In the early days, the object of your love depends on you absolutely, and every expression of displeasu...more
Of the MANY books about motherhood that I've read, both fiction and nonfiction, this is the only one that came close to the reality that I experienced as a new mother (and pretty much still do, 4 years later). Cusk is the only mother (that I know of) who is brave enough to tell the truth about the feeling of your identity being taken from you against your will, and that the permanent loss of your former self and former life is not recompensed by the "privilege of motherhood." Her comparison of m...more
I don't know exactly what to say about this book. It was good, but it was so dark. I read two chapters and said, "My God, this woman must be British." Her sense of humor was so dry! I can't decide if she was in a deep postpartum depression or what. I realize the book is about her and her experience, but she never mentions her spouse or baby's name. There is no joy to be found and while I understand how difficult it is to transition to motherhood, even on the most difficult days, I found joy in a...more
Sep 01, 2010
Carrie
rated it
3 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
reluctant mothers
Recommended to Carrie by:
Supergrandpa
My grandfather sent me this book a couple months after the birth of my son.
Honest, refreshing, comforting... Cusk tells of her rough transition to motherhood. It was nice to hear that you can love your child and feel the burden of motherhood at the same time.
The right book at the right time.
Author: Rachel Cusk
Publisher: Picador
Copyright: 2001
Genre: Memoir/ Parenting
Pages: 212
Date Read- 6/10- 8/10
QUOTES:
_________
(p. 5)
...after a child is born the lives of its mother and father diverge, so that...more
Honest, refreshing, comforting... Cusk tells of her rough transition to motherhood. It was nice to hear that you can love your child and feel the burden of motherhood at the same time.
The right book at the right time.
Author: Rachel Cusk
Publisher: Picador
Copyright: 2001
Genre: Memoir/ Parenting
Pages: 212
Date Read- 6/10- 8/10
QUOTES:
_________
(p. 5)
...after a child is born the lives of its mother and father diverge, so that...more
I'm not sure how I feel about this book.
Rachel Cusk writes beautifully and her viewpoint is one I generally agree with. I also have a lot of sympathy for her, it seems like she went through some major post-partum depression. I was so sure I would I have post-partum depression after my I had my son, but for some reason I didn't (perhaps just the joy of not being pregnant?). This book reminds me how important it is for people to have access to mental health services and screening during this time,...more
Rachel Cusk writes beautifully and her viewpoint is one I generally agree with. I also have a lot of sympathy for her, it seems like she went through some major post-partum depression. I was so sure I would I have post-partum depression after my I had my son, but for some reason I didn't (perhaps just the joy of not being pregnant?). This book reminds me how important it is for people to have access to mental health services and screening during this time,...more
judging by the horrible cover design, I was expecting some fairly light mommy reading, so I was pleasantly surprised to find that this is much more of an intellectual read. Cusk writes about becoming a mother in a way that I have not read before, and puts into words a lot of things that I have thought about. my only issue with this book was the excerpts she includes from other literary works, which at times made it feel more like required reading for an english class.
Mar 03, 2013
Ayelet Waldman
added it
The writing is beautiful, the book is totally me, and I loved every minute of it. I was screaming, "Amen! Amen!" until right near the end. And then she lost me. She can't leave the house for more than an hour without calling to make sure the baby is okay? Oy. That's the guilt talking, sweetie. If you weren't feeling so awful about your ambivalence, you'd be fine about leaving. Just go!
Oct 31, 2011
Teresa B
rated it
1 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
no one
Recommended to Teresa by:
a friend
Shelves:
auto-or-biography,
non-fiction
This treatise on the evolution from woman to mother is beautifully written, but I found Cusk's perspective so depressing that I only finished it because I promised a friend that I would. It has its moments of hilarious irony, but they are so bound by the idea of imprisonment by motherhood that I found them hard to enjoy.
Finished this awhile ago; have not been updating my Goodreads. Wavered between four and five stars for this. It was beautifully written and captured a lot of the more terrifying, uncomfortable aspects of pregnancy perfectly. I can't speak for the motherhood bits yet, but they were powerful as well (though hard to read at times). Rachel Cusk obviously has some issues of her own that she's working through in this writing and I don't believe her work is completely representative of motherhood on th...more
The most honest account of early motherhood I have read. Cusk's writing is always elegant and deeply thoughtful. I was so glad to become better acquainted with her candor beyond fiction. This book helped me (immensely) in the latter part of the first year of mothering.
I'm inspired to read more of Rachel Cusk. She writes beautifully and I thought this book was very good. Yes, she's sharp and sarcastic, and is sparing with exclamation marks (maybe this is the problem some readers have, judging by other comments?), but she's also really funny.
Completely gets the humour and terror, and the perpetual dazedness of early motherhood. Cusk brilliantly balances being deeply, discomfortingly personal, and detached, almost clinical, in her take on things. The writing is clean, beautiful, goes down like the best scotch on rocks. Very satisfying.
This was all right, but it pales somewhat next to the astonishing depth of Susan Maushart's "The Mask of Motherhood". I had read a quote from Ms. Cusk about the parenting culture that really spoke to me and I was hoping it was in here--it wasn't. Will have to seek out some of her other material.
wow, WHO recommended this? was it metafilter? what a misstep. tiny parts here & there were dead on to my experience, but i barely related to the rest at all. it was just pretentious & awkward. & though i'm both of those things, i mean, not at all in the same way. just. wow. i couldn't wait to be finished with this book so i could read something else.
At first I thought this book was going to be great for me. I enjoyed the sarcasm and pithy comments about the craziness that is pregnancy. I could see it would be an erudite rumination on motherhood from someone with as much ambivalence as I have. However, once she began to quote Edith Wharton that was it. "Erudite" quickly became "long-winded" and "pity" became "annoyingly british." Besides, Edith Wharton? Ugh. I don't do Edith Wharton. If that makes me a terrible feminist, so be it. I continue...more
Very disturbing and moving book about the "traps" of motherhood. Everything you've always wanted to know about becoming a mother and every mother refused to tell you. It's brilliantly written and quite funny at times.
I think this is the last of the new-mother memoirs I'm going to read. This is the headiest of the ones that I've read. I had lots of quotes I wanted to write down, but of course, I'm past the days of being able to have a pen and paper near me.
It's also of course the story of an upper middle class married woman bemoaning the trials of new motherhood, of how it negated her identity.
I liked the conversation between her and a friend who had a baby the same age as hers. They were talking about all t...more
It's also of course the story of an upper middle class married woman bemoaning the trials of new motherhood, of how it negated her identity.
I liked the conversation between her and a friend who had a baby the same age as hers. They were talking about all t...more
This book would be completely disturbing to someone without kids... but wow, I found it so refreshing. I clutched it to my chest in a dramatic hug upon completion. Cusk put all of my most terrible thoughts on motherhood into words, and I love her for it.
A lot of her language feels needlessly complicated. I found some of her experience reassuring, but mostly found it hard to sympathise with her. Thought the introduction was the best bit of the book.
Aug 13, 2007
Maya
rated it
4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
Anyone thinking about becoming a mother, particularly someone young, David
This is a memoir by Rachel Cusk about her first year being a mother. It was not nearly as depressing and tragic as I thought it would be, but it was relentlessly realistic and gave me a good idea of how much time a child would take from your life. I think this is as close as I've seen anyone come to saying, "I should never have been a mother." Nevertheless, you definitely see some positives and it really just made me think, wow, once you become a mother you can't go back, so I should put this of...more
A Life's Work is brutally honest about the joys and sorrows of motherhood, and maintains a sharp sense of humor throughout with unexpected moments of hilarity.
She's very smart. Still, I finished the book feeling that I'd been kept further than arm's length from her and her experience, even though this is a memoir.
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RACHEL CUSK is the Whitbread Award–winning author of two memoirs, including The Last Supper, and seven novels, including Arlington Park, Saving Agnes, The Temporary, The Country Life, and The Lucky Ones. She lives in Brighton, England.
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03 fév. 09:08