Sign in with Facebook
Loading...
242nd out of 299 books
—
403 voters
Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart: Thirty True Things You Need to Know Now
After service in Vietnam as a surgeon in 1968-69, Dr. Gordon Livingston returned to the U.S. and began work as a psychiatrist. In that capacity, he has listened to people talk about their lives and the limitless ways that they have found to be unhappy. He is also a parent twice bereaved. In one thirteen-month period, he lost his eldest son to suicide, his youngest to leuke...more
Hardcover, 192 pages
Published
November 9th 2004
by Da Capo Press
(first published 2004)
Friend Reviews
To see what your friends thought of this book,
please sign up.
Community Reviews
(showing
1-30
of
1,243)
Chicken Soup for the Soul … but Missing a Few Noodles
Dr. Gordon Livingston, psychiatrist, imparts his 30 pearls of wisdom in this short pithy book. He has had his share of suffering and scar tissue. Within a 13-month period, one of his sons committed suicide and another died in an accident. Plus, the guy got run over by a riderless snowmobile while standing in a lift line. Talk about “bad things happening to good people”!
My main misgiving is that each chapter seems to consist of preachy platitud...more
Dr. Gordon Livingston, psychiatrist, imparts his 30 pearls of wisdom in this short pithy book. He has had his share of suffering and scar tissue. Within a 13-month period, one of his sons committed suicide and another died in an accident. Plus, the guy got run over by a riderless snowmobile while standing in a lift line. Talk about “bad things happening to good people”!
My main misgiving is that each chapter seems to consist of preachy platitud...more
I enjoyed this. Gordon is a psychiatrist that lost one son to suicide and one to bone marrow transplant complications. This book is the 30 things he feels are fundamental in understanding our human condition (i.e. finding hope in a world where everyone eventually ends up dead) that come from his own experiences with grief and his clients' stories. He says he's an agnostic that hopes "beyond reason" to see his sons again.
He has some good points. He says he finds most things to be a good news/bad...more
He has some good points. He says he finds most things to be a good news/bad...more
Dr. Livingston is a practicing psychiatrist. His book provide outstanding insights into recognizing our problems and improving our life situation. It would be virtually impossible for anyone to read his book without recognizing themselves in it many times over. I have included my Amazon review of the book below:
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Insights into The Problems of Life: Help Is On The Way..., September 24, 2008
By Lawrence J Danks (New Jersey) - See all...more
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Insights into The Problems of Life: Help Is On The Way..., September 24, 2008
By Lawrence J Danks (New Jersey) - See all...more
I have had this book on my to-be-read list ever since watching the Oprah Winfrey/OWN series Why Not? with Shania Twain. It was a fascinating bit of television exploring the music superstar's personal and professional collapse after betrayal and divorce (her husband cheated on her with her best friend and, in a truth is stranger than fiction move, Twain found comfort in her best friend's now ex-husband and ended up marrying him!). Part of Twain's road to recovery were meetings with the author of...more
I though this would be an inspirational book, and I guess to some people it probably is. However, I found it kind of confusing. The chapter titles appeared to be about one thing, but in many cases the supporting text ended up in another, only vaguely related place entirely. I didn't personally get anything out of it, but I don't think it was written for introspective people at all so that's probably why.
3 likes · like · see review
view 1 comment
Picked this book up off the B&N bargain table while killing time one evening and was hooked.
Written by a psychiatrist and former surgeon, (and I think you can really hear the no nonsense MD in his writing)Livingston offers some life coaching in the form of 30 pieces of advice. What I like about this book is you can digest it in little pieces. His philosophy seems very Buddhist to me, only without the gentleness of say, Thich Nat Hanh;s writing. This is not shlocky comfort food writing, it fe...more
Written by a psychiatrist and former surgeon, (and I think you can really hear the no nonsense MD in his writing)Livingston offers some life coaching in the form of 30 pieces of advice. What I like about this book is you can digest it in little pieces. His philosophy seems very Buddhist to me, only without the gentleness of say, Thich Nat Hanh;s writing. This is not shlocky comfort food writing, it fe...more
I bought the book on a business trip. I had run out of stuff to read (not a good thing), and saw this book on the shelf. It grabbed my attention: perhaps this was the type of book I could lend to my children for their own insights.
I was disappointed. The overall tone of the book, I find, is rather cynical. Perhaps all those years of hearing unhappy people talk about their problems rubbed off on Mr. Livingston? While much of what he says has value, the package in which he presents his advice was...more
I was disappointed. The overall tone of the book, I find, is rather cynical. Perhaps all those years of hearing unhappy people talk about their problems rubbed off on Mr. Livingston? While much of what he says has value, the package in which he presents his advice was...more
"Out of a lifetime of experience, Livingston has extracted thirty bedrock truths: We are what we do. Any relationship is under the control of the person who cares the least. The perfect is the enemy of the good. Only bad things happen quickly. Forgiveness is a form of letting go, but they are not the same thing. The statute of limitations has expired on most of our childhood traumas. Livingston illuminates these and twenty-four others in perfectly calibrated essays, many of which emphasize our c...more
2 likes · like · see review
Billed as "Thirty True Things You Need to Know Now," the one line chapter headers are usually more memorable than the narrative that follows. Some restate other popular sayings, yet bear repeating for the truth and wisdom boiled down into one line. My favorites: "The statute of limitations has expired on most of our childhood traumas;" "Any relationship is under the control of the person who cares the least;" "Only bad things happen quickly;" "If the map doesn't agree with the ground, the map is...more
Maybe it's because I'm a psychologist/counselor in training, but I didn't like this book as much as I thought I would, perhaps because it's from a psychiatrist's point of view? Psychiatrists don't usually do psychotherapy...so this book coming from a psychiatrist seemed odd to me. While some of what his chapter titles (or the 30 things you need to know now) were good and important, the actual chapters didn't always seem so related to what he was saying and were full of his own experiences. He ma...more
Sentimental blather. I read a review of this and thought it sounded interesting. It wasn't. Perhaps I should just give self-help books a wide berth -- they really seem to annoy me.
one of the (out of many) reasons i enjoy reading books is due to something I once read somewhere (sorry cant remember where, maybe a brian tracy book/audio) that books are the most valuable and cheapest method to get so much knowledge that took another a lifetime to figure out - and this is so true and has always stuck with me,
and this is especially one of them books, and one of my favs/5 stars! really gives yousome important wisdom and to think material that everyone has to del with in life, b...more
and this is especially one of them books, and one of my favs/5 stars! really gives yousome important wisdom and to think material that everyone has to del with in life, b...more
Best bargain bin book I've picked up at Barnes and Noble. Was hooked from the first chapter - If the map doesn't agree with the ground, then the map is wrong. Filled with bits of wisdom, Gordon Livingston, M.D. sorts through life's often complex moments. Using humor, practical advice and personal anecdotes, Livingston uses experience gained through age to address issues of relationships, love, grief, loss, parenting, fear and happiness. Simple truths expressed with compassion and understanding,...more
1 like · like · see review
Livingston provides provocative insights into 30 topics, drawing from his personal life history and his professional experience as a psychiatrist. The subtitle -- whether composed by Livingston or more likely his publisher -- "Thirty True Things You Need to Know" overreaches and even conflicts with what I take to be Livingston's outlook. His theses should not be read so much as "truths," but rather as psychological and philosophical ors d'ouerves to chew on before sitting down to the main course...more
I liked this book a lot and I found myself looking forward to my breaks so I could sneak in a few pages. The only issue I had was that some of the thought provoking ideas don't offer any solution but maybe there wasn't any. The one point that stayed with me is how my parents feel irrelevant, it made me want to listen to them more even though they do talk about mindless drivel most of the time. I found myself wanted to be more respectful and caring as I know I'm already feeling I'm soon to be "ou...more
Short read--but essential advice for living life well! I find myself reading parts of this to loved ones nearby, or even agreeing out loud when I'm alone. There is such profound yet simple wisdom in parts of this book that it should be required reading for everyone. Repeat: *everyone* should read this book. Truly wish I had the funds to buy a copy for each friend, family member and patient. A gem! In short, let go of the victim, external locus of control mentality and instead focus on being an a...more
As far as advice books go, this one has more moments of clarity and wisdom than any I have encountered. Its major flaw is also its major asset--Livingston does not shy from mixing his own polemics and life experience with bits of professional observation. This approach invites the reader to trust him, as he is confessing his own struggles throughout, and creates a contrast against books that take a tone of expertise and authority without individual perspective.
Read with your own sifter; keep th...more
Read with your own sifter; keep th...more
This book was loaned to me by a friend.
On the plus side, it was a quick and easy read. The title chapters were powerful, powerful, powerful and got me thinking and contemplating. Titles such as:
*The statute of limitations has expired on most of our childhood traumas
*Any relationships is under the control of the person who cares the least
*Not all who wander are lost
*It's a poor idea to lie to oneself
*We are prone to the myth of the perfect stranger
From looking at the title chapters, I thought I w...more
On the plus side, it was a quick and easy read. The title chapters were powerful, powerful, powerful and got me thinking and contemplating. Titles such as:
*The statute of limitations has expired on most of our childhood traumas
*Any relationships is under the control of the person who cares the least
*Not all who wander are lost
*It's a poor idea to lie to oneself
*We are prone to the myth of the perfect stranger
From looking at the title chapters, I thought I w...more
Good little read, nicely structured and cleanly written. Focuses more heavily than I needed on finding love, psychotherapy and treatment, and old age, but that doesn't make the points any less worthy. Some of the chapters that spoke to me most, and salient points (directly quoted):
2. We are what we do.
We get not what we deserve but what we expect.
Past behavior is the most reliable predictor of future behavior.
8. The perfect is the enemy of the good.
Control is a popular illusion closely relate...more
2. We are what we do.
We get not what we deserve but what we expect.
Past behavior is the most reliable predictor of future behavior.
8. The perfect is the enemy of the good.
Control is a popular illusion closely relate...more
some of my favorite quotes:
-the three components of happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to look foward to.
-we love someone when the importance of his or her needs and desires rises to the level of our own (i.e. "would you take a bullet for this person?").
-the motivations and habit patterns that underlie most of our behavior are seldom logical; we are much more often driven by impulses, preconceptions, and emotions of which we are only dimly aware.
- we require contracts...more
-the three components of happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to look foward to.
-we love someone when the importance of his or her needs and desires rises to the level of our own (i.e. "would you take a bullet for this person?").
-the motivations and habit patterns that underlie most of our behavior are seldom logical; we are much more often driven by impulses, preconceptions, and emotions of which we are only dimly aware.
- we require contracts...more
This book represents a gift, as so many of my books do. As always, there’s a story to the gift and I can’t tell the entire story here, but this book was presented as a going away present from a manager I really appreciated and respected. She gave me the book that she told me one of her managers had given her and it held a very special place in her life. I doubt with her busy schedule and young family, she possibly has time to read my blog, but while it took me a while to get to the book, I truly...more
Nov 18, 2007
Darga
rated it
4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
introspective people who want to change their life in subtle or large ways
Shelves:
how-to-be-human
i picked this up on a whim the other night, and had finished it before i went to bed. it's a very light read, but filled with some interesting insights.
"people often come to me asking for medication. they are tired of their sad mood fatigue, and loss of interest in things that previously gave them pleasure... Here is what i tell them: the good news is that we have effective treatments for the symptoms of depression: the bad news is that medication will not make you happy. happiness is not simp...more
"people often come to me asking for medication. they are tired of their sad mood fatigue, and loss of interest in things that previously gave them pleasure... Here is what i tell them: the good news is that we have effective treatments for the symptoms of depression: the bad news is that medication will not make you happy. happiness is not simp...more
Great book. I believe many people will feel they can relate Livingston's writing. It is a therapist in your pocket. Good for the old and young, Livingston calls people to be accountable for what they DO rather than what they feel, intend, or dream. For while these aspects shape our character, they do not define us as profoundly as actions. However, hope is a big overarching theme leading to an overall positive message. Livingston is slightly preachy at times, but that is the nature of this sort...more
Strange how some books arrives in your hand. I was travelling to Sweden with my son to get Stem Cell, arriving at Arlanda I was thinking it is 8 years no since we came to this place first for the Bone Marrow transplant my son gone through twice. Just grabbed this book as the title looked intresting. Strangley I found out when I started to read the book the author is a therapist as I am and had a son also ith leukimia. So I thought someone made my grab this book. Good book that everyone should re...more
I found some real clear rules for life I think are helpful. One was that personal qualities tend to exist as constellations of "traits", as Livingston explains it. So run when you feel; sadness, anger, betrayal, surprise ,and/or disorientation in a relationship. Plus the three components of happiness are: something to do, someone to love, and something to look forward to. You can read most of the big ideas from this book just skimming it in the book store.
There are some people who just read books to find meaning. There are others who live life to find meaning and then write better books. This is just someone living long and well and putting crumb trails along the path to help the rest of us. This is a guy who has risked, suffered and invested to the degree that wisdom pours out over chapter by chapter. I don't agree with everything that he has written, but then I haven't lived as much as he has yet.
Psychiatrist who lost 2 sons, one to suicide and one to leukemia. Some excellent perspectives on getting old. Of all the forms of courage, the ability to laugh is the most therapeutic. Chapter 12 The problems of the elderly are frequently serious but seldom interesting. Many of his chapters deal with the effects of the myth of unconditional love. M. Scott Peck clobbers the myth of unconditional love in People of the Lie.
You could read this book all the way through from start to finish. Or you could pick a chapter at random. Either way, it's a wonderful book. Not a blame everything on your parents or history, let me give you a hug type of book. Each chapter gives you something to think about. For example: chapter 13 Happiness is the ultimate risk. Or chapter 4 The statute of limitations has expired on most of our childhood traumas.
I wanted this book to be fabulous, but it fell a bit short of my expectations. It's basically comprised of 30 short chapters, each one a treatise on one of 30 "truisms" that Dr. Livingston has discovered through his life's work and experience. Within a span of 13 months, he lost two sons--one to suicide and one to leukemia. He speaks from a unique viewpoint, a cross between grieving parent and pragmatic psychotherapist. Some of the more interesting chapter titles were: "The statute of limitation...more
I have read this book twice. Full of wisdom, this collection of pithy observations on how we deal with the hard stuff in life was touching and heartbreaking. Livingston lost two children, one to Leukemia and one to suicide, and he shares the lessons he's learned from those losses as well as his knowledge as a psychiatrist. A wonderful book for anyone interested in creating a meaningful life.
There are no discussion topics on this book yet.
Be the first to start one »
Share This Book
No trivia or quizzes yet. Add some now »
“If the map doesn't agree with the ground the map is wrong”
—
9 people liked it
“It is our determination to overcome fear and discouragement that constitutes the only effective antidote to the sense of powerlessness over unwanted feelings.”
—
1 person liked it
More quotes…
