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14th out of 285 books
—
291 voters
Games People Play
by
Eric Berne
We think we're relating to other people;but actually we're all playing games. Forty years ago, Games People Play revolutionized our understanding of what really goes on during our most basic social interactions. More than five million copies later, Dr. Eric Berne's classic is as astonishing;and revealing;as it was on the day it was first published. This anniversary edition...more
Paperback, 162 pages
Published
by penguin
(first published 1964)
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i'm currently reading the 1960-something edition of this book although there is a 1996 edition. it really doesn't matter. i feel like i've found the holy grail. i know y'all's games bitches! that means ima gonna win! fuck yea! eat my metaphoric, insinuating, quadruple entendre shorts!
...no really, i'm learning some heavy shit about human relationships...
...no really, i'm learning some heavy shit about human relationships...
Oct 12, 2007
Beth
rated it
5 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
everyone who likes to understand social interaction
how to recognize patterns of behavior and
motivation inin relationships and conversations -
puts a name on various ambiguous manipulation methods
motivation inin relationships and conversations -
puts a name on various ambiguous manipulation methods
smart. Falls into the category of books that give you the secret reason for why things happen the way they do.
This a an excellent readable and practical explanation of destructive social interactions, He breaks down common patterns (this is from the 60's so there are variations now) and shows easy ways to identify games that people are acting out , and what it looks like to live game-free
Berne is funny and insightful. It is a shame that so few people I know really are willing to look deeply at these kinds of issues. Sort of like feminism I find an attitude of "we're past that", but then i see all the pr...more
Berne is funny and insightful. It is a shame that so few people I know really are willing to look deeply at these kinds of issues. Sort of like feminism I find an attitude of "we're past that", but then i see all the pr...more
I've read this book two times, this is the third book written by Prof. Eric Berne, which I've read up to now, and I believe this is the best one. It's hard to explain how much i've learned from this book, I think I should read the book once more to learn some new things.
This book shows you the "Games" which are behind the human's relationships, it believes that a great number of human's relations are a kind of "Game" indeed. But at the end of the book, Prof. Eric Berne explains that the highest...more
This book shows you the "Games" which are behind the human's relationships, it believes that a great number of human's relations are a kind of "Game" indeed. But at the end of the book, Prof. Eric Berne explains that the highest...more
Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships is a 1964 bestselling book by psychiatrist Eric Berne. Since its publication it has sold more than five million copies. The book describes both functional & dysfunctional social interactions. In the 1st half, he introduces Transactional Analysis as a way of interpreting social interactions. He describes three roles or ego states known as the Child, the Parent & the Adult & postulates that many negative behaviors can be traced t
...more
This book describes what is now known as transactional analysis, a psychological approach where a lot of relations between people are seen and catalogued as ´games´, which are situations where the conscious communication says something but the unconscious says another. Some or all of the participants gets some ´reward´ as confirmation of inner beliefs, interaction with other people, protection from inner fears, recognition, etc, etc.
Besides the unfamiliar description I just gave, Eric Berne, fou...more
Besides the unfamiliar description I just gave, Eric Berne, fou...more
Had to choose between Game People Play and Reviving Ophelia for Personal Growth class when I was at MSJC (2002-2006). I choose Games People Play and I'm so glad I read this back then. What a great psychology book. You have relationships with people, but do you know if it is parent to adult, or parent to child or child to child? This book will give you examples of what a adult to adult relationship will look like as well as the others. The second half of the book goes into the games that we play...more
I’m glad I read it, but it wasn’t ultimately everything that I wanted it to be.
The theory at the beginning was absolutely fascinating and, even though the books itself is from the 1960’s, it has significant value for being the start of the field of transactional psychology.
However, the description of the games themselves was where I found the book lacking. Mostly, this is where I also felt the impact of the book being so dated. Some of his descriptions of games were based on stereotypical gend...more
The theory at the beginning was absolutely fascinating and, even though the books itself is from the 1960’s, it has significant value for being the start of the field of transactional psychology.
However, the description of the games themselves was where I found the book lacking. Mostly, this is where I also felt the impact of the book being so dated. Some of his descriptions of games were based on stereotypical gend...more
Like anything else in life, *Games…* has both assets and liabilities. On the negative side: TA was in its infancy when the book was written; some of the material is dated; the inescapable, tireless fury of psychobabble lurks within; there is a certain mechanistic rigidity (the "cookie-cutter curse") to the approach; and much of it is gender-specific. (This apparent defect is also an advantage. See below). On the positive side, Berne's method is both substantive and -- most importantly -- workab...more
A great theory for human behavior that fundamentally changed the way I look at social relationships. Berne lays out his theory that individuals are divided into 3 fundamental subselves, the child, adult, and parent, and these subselves are activated and engaged by subselves of others. Games are unhealthy or non-functional patterns we fall into based on how we interact with others. Berne's games were also the basis for many of Edward Albee's plays.
Berne enjoys communicating, as evidenced by the...more
Berne enjoys communicating, as evidenced by the...more
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Was alerted to this while reading “Payback” by Margaret Atwood, in which this book is referenced several times. The subtitle is “The Psychology of Human Relationships”, and in reading it I certainly recognised some folk who I have human relationships with, and more disconcertingly, I recognised myself!
An interesting and entertaining enough read, and I can well imagine how it has influenced the study of human relationships since 1964, when it was first published.
However, the social situations, an...more
An interesting and entertaining enough read, and I can well imagine how it has influenced the study of human relationships since 1964, when it was first published.
However, the social situations, an...more
Nov 22, 2011
Imaginary
added it
Нет, определенно, Эрик Берн сейчас пришелся очень вовремя :)
Больше всего меня успокаивают его описания человеческого взаимодействия через "трансакции" (соглашения/сделки), а также пояснения, что люди во многое действительно играют. Потому что в последнее время чем дальше, тем сильнее росло и крепло у меня параноидальное ощущение, что все вокруг действуют согласно неким договоренностям, в которые меня почему-то не посвятили. Таким образом, его книга действительно многое мне объясняет.
Однако, на м...more
Больше всего меня успокаивают его описания человеческого взаимодействия через "трансакции" (соглашения/сделки), а также пояснения, что люди во многое действительно играют. Потому что в последнее время чем дальше, тем сильнее росло и крепло у меня параноидальное ощущение, что все вокруг действуют согласно неким договоренностям, в которые меня почему-то не посвятили. Таким образом, его книга действительно многое мне объясняет.
Однако, на м...more
I don't know if this is a reliable textbook for day to day human interaction. This might be better retitled "Familiar Film Noir Tropes" or "Perceived and Imagined Slights from Women I've Never Met" or "Interpersonal Dilemmas in the Sunday Funnies." When was the last time you found yourself embroiled in the classic "Now I've Got You, You Son of a Bitch" or "Let's Pull a Fast One on Joey"? Can you solve the riddle of "The Frigid Woman"? This book is mildly amusing but there are too many grievous o...more
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Excellent book. The author starts with the concept of "strokes" that every basic interaction between people is like petting a cat. If the strokes in a conversation are even, and appropriate, the conversation goes well. Then he incorporates the idea that every person has an inner parent, adult and child. There are certain interactions that go well (adult-adult, parent-child) and those that go poorly (adult adressing adult, but the second person responds as a child, forcing the first person to act...more
Feb 18, 2013
Megan Ross
rated it
4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
ms. durbin
Recommended to Megan by:
stephanie ross
"Games people play is a psychology book that sees conversations as games, and the style written in this book, exposition, it is very effective. Eric Berne, the author of this book, purpose is to explain all of the psychological games we are playing and how it affects our minds. The theme of this book was "Self Help" as it was explaining and analyzing this topic that would be very helpful to the reader so that he or she can handle his self or her self better in these psychological games. I think...more
I read this book because I was curious about the various ways people interact with each other in social situations. The book was fairly interesting, but I found many of the descriptions to be very outdated and the author overused acronymns for the various "games." I don't think that most people recognize that they often use little tricks and play these games in their social interactions with their friends, co-workers, and family. The names the author gave the games were pretty amusing, e.g. "fri...more
This book is excellent for people who have been stuck in problematic interpersonal communication relationships. The basic information about the different kinds of transactional games that are used for people to attain whatever they want illuminates the traps that I have fallen into over and over again. While our society provides an emphasis on production at any cost, the importance of the information shows that the cost of production is the very psyches of the people within an organization. I ha...more
I've known much of the material in this book most of my life without realizing it, since my father made an effort during my childhood to make me aware of these "games people play". Berne outlines Transactional Analysis and examples of games people play in order to analyze why they are played and what can be done to make the games played constructive instead of destructive. The most important part of this book is to become aware of the games in order to pay attention to them in real social situat...more
گويا اين كتاب به فارسي ترجمه شده. دري بود به دنيايي كه براي من ناشناخته است. اين جور بهتره: از وجود و اندازه هاي چنين دنيايي خبر روشني نداشتم.
In opening, I'll just say that Courts should order this book read by alcoholic offenders rather than sending them to AA. Definitely.
Simply, this is a fascinating, insightful book on self-improvement. More complicatedly, the author goes to great pains to help uncover the motives behind pretty much all human interaction, perhaps primarily to make money, but also that we might improve ourselves and tear down self-imposed barriers that have been holding us back! And he does it all in only 216 pages!...more
Simply, this is a fascinating, insightful book on self-improvement. More complicatedly, the author goes to great pains to help uncover the motives behind pretty much all human interaction, perhaps primarily to make money, but also that we might improve ourselves and tear down self-imposed barriers that have been holding us back! And he does it all in only 216 pages!...more
The author believes that people spend most of their lives playing games, which may or may not be fun or serious. We learn these games from our parents and others around us and pass them down through the generations. All games can be played in various degrees, ranging from social pastimes to deadly serious games which end in 'the courtroom or the morgue'. The games are classified into categories - Life Games, Marital Games, Party Games, Sexual Games, et cetera, and each category contains several...more
This book is a fascinating psychological journey into the minds of everyday people (including, and probably ESPECIALLY, your own). Berne's list of psychological "games" we all play with each other is fascinating, as is what you learn about yourself by analyzing which games you tend to revisit regularly.
One little warning: When you learn to recognize these games, you will be forced to eliminate at least 95% of the B.S. in your life and frequently find yourself disgusted by 100% of the B.S. in eve...more
One little warning: When you learn to recognize these games, you will be forced to eliminate at least 95% of the B.S. in your life and frequently find yourself disgusted by 100% of the B.S. in eve...more
Всем наверняка знакомы слова "Вся наша жизнь - игра". Но как правило мы очень редко осознаем как много же этих игровых моментов на самом деле происходят в повседневной жизни. Да и наверное не нужно очень уж усердствовать и всех их пытаться уловить и поймать, поскольку вашего времени практически больше ни на что не останется.
Автор создал очень хороший труд, и прекрасно описал то, что в нашей жизни то и делает, что постоянно пролетает неосознанно.
Но если всё таки мы изредка научимся фокусироваться...more
Автор создал очень хороший труд, и прекрасно описал то, что в нашей жизни то и делает, что постоянно пролетает неосознанно.
Но если всё таки мы изредка научимся фокусироваться...more
Jan 01, 2008
Yinmin thiha
rated it
5 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommends it for:
excellent
I guides you to learn about human"s reaction to response any situation arises.
I'm sure this was very innovative for it's time and it's still immensely insightful, but I can't help feeling that it could have been presented better. The style is a little quirky and confusing (disorganized at times), but the author purposely avoided technical terminology so the layman could utilize this knowledge.
You do not need to read Berne's previous book, Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy, to understand the concepts, but it could be helpful
You do not need to read Berne's previous book, Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy, to understand the concepts, but it could be helpful
I really enjoyed this one as it combines logic/science/systematic-approach to explain the often unpredictable psychology of human-relations. Explains a lot about how people interact and what they spend much of their time doing in conversation (gaining approval/validation, abdicating responsibility, etc). Very comprehensive coverage of the simple to the complex, as well as the different nuances and angles involved in how people converse, choose friends/mates, etc. If you're like me, you'll love i...more
Interesting, but I found the Transactional Analysis theory vastly oversimplistic. The idea of the Adult/Parent/Child paradigm just seemed very limited as a way of analyzing the complexity of human behavior, and I found it difficult to put much stock in that aspect of the book.
The games themselves were interesting and recognizable-that was easily the best part of the book, reading the descriptions and putting faces of people I know (sometimes my own) on the players, but I wish there had been more...more
The games themselves were interesting and recognizable-that was easily the best part of the book, reading the descriptions and putting faces of people I know (sometimes my own) on the players, but I wish there had been more...more
It's a book about visible and hidden interpersonal interactions in a social environment. But it seems to me that it's suites more for psychiatrists than for general public. The games and analysis of games are described from clinical therapy point of view. Almost all of the games in the book are negative ones or described in this way. I don't remember any positive game. Also it's not so easy to read it and sometimes simple concepts are too obscured.
Anyway it's a good introduction into Transactio...more
Anyway it's a good introduction into Transactio...more
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Eric Berne was a Canadian-born psychiatrist best known as the creator of transactional analysis. Eric was born on May 10, 1910 as Eric Lennard Bernstein in Montreal, Canada.He and his sister Grace, who was five years younger than Eric, were the children of a physician and a writer, David and Sara Gordon Bernstein.David Bernstein died in 1921, and the children were raised by their mother.
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“Awareness requires living in the here and now, and not in the elsewhere, the past or the future.”
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