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The Friendship Factor: How to Get Closer to the People You Care for
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The Friendship Factor: How to Get Closer to the People You Care for

4.10  ·  Rating Details  ·  513 Ratings  ·  44 Reviews
At the heart of each relationship, says McGinnis, is the friendship factor - the essential ingredient of warmth and caring. With captivating case histories and anecdotes about such famous people as George Burns, Howard Hughes, and C. S. Lewis, McGinnis shares the secret of how to love and be loved. The first edition of The Friendship Factor, published in 1979, has sold mor ...more
Paperback, 224 pages
Published January 1st 2004 by Augsburg Fortress Publishing (first published 1978)
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Daniel Taylor
Aug 05, 2011 Daniel Taylor rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: Anyone who wants better friendships
I still remember the day I found a copy of this at Word Bookstore across the road from Flinder St Station in Melbourne. At the time, I had no deep friendships and I craved for that to change or I knew I'd kill myself. This book literally changed my life as it gave me practical, rather than theoretical, tips and tools on how to build deep relationships.

Since then, many friendships in my life have come and gone, but I'm also proud to say that I now have a small number of close friends whom I have
Apr 02, 2012 Abbey rated it liked it
This book sounded like it would be right up my alley because I am a robot who is incapable of simulating a basic interpersonal connection.

Awesome. Sold.

The book started to lose me around the part where he talks about the woman with low self esteem, and he's like, "and then SEVERAL people told her she was pretty, and she was cured forever!"

The chapter on touch didn't sit well with me either, because after citing all this research about how good touch is for your brain, he's like, "so men, you
Apr 17, 2015 Omnia.AH rated it it was amazing
Shelves: favorites
من أروع ما قرأت في تطوير الذات.. الصداقة شيء مهم في حياتنا ولولا الصداقة لما استطاع أي شخص الاستمرار في حياته بشكلٍ طبيعي. هذا الكتاب يتيح لنا الفرصة بكل بساطة من تعلم قواعد وعناصر الصداقة الأساسية لنزداد قرباً ممن نحب فعلا وممن نهتم بأمرهم.. شكرًا سيد ماكجينيس على هذا الكتاب الذي أعده حاليا مرجعاً لي
Ashish Goyal
Sep 03, 2012 Ashish Goyal rated it it was amazing
reading this book will tell you how much complicate we make our lives or how easy it is.....
1. Talk about every problem and there's none, believe me.
2. Go easy. That's it.
Sara Rassler
Mar 09, 2011 Sara Rassler rated it really liked it
It has been some time since I have written a review for lack of time to read for pleasure anymore. However, in my Basic Communication class we were required to read The Friendship Factor by Alan Loy McGinnis. I’ll admit I started the book reluctantly even though my instructor reassured us that it would be a “keeper”. Now that I’ve finished it, I’m glad I did.

No matter what one has been through, chances are he or she has been through hardships in some sort of relationship, and I am no exception t
Nov 13, 2008 Donabilla rated it really liked it
Recommends it for: نظرة قارئة
لأن الصداقة تمثل نقطة الانطلاق لكل علاقة تتسم بالحب و الحميمية..
من أكثر ما أعجبني ما يلي:
إن من أفضل الوسائل لتعميق الصداقة تناول الطعام سوياً, فقد كان الانبياء عليهم السلام يتناولون الطعام مع رفاقهم, ويتجاذبون أطراف الحديث معهم. فهناك إحساس رائع عندما يتقاسم إثنان طعامهما, ولعله من المستبعد أن تتناول طعامك مع عدوك و تظل بينكما نفس مشاعر العداوة لبعض.


من الغريب أن نتحدث عن العلاقات بين الآباء و الأبناء في ضوء كرم الضيافة , لكن من الأسس النهنة لعقيدتنا أن أطفالنا ليسوا ممتلكاتنا الشخصية لنتح
Aug 03, 2010 Mandy rated it really liked it
This book was amazing! A friend suggested it to me after he read it and said it would help me with what I was going through. He was right! this book helps you understand things that may be happening with your friends, and how you can help your relationship with your friends. I would suggest that everyone should at least skim through this book. It makes very strong points that would help any friend become a better one. :)
Nov 28, 2013 Gretchen rated it it was amazing
An oldie but a goodie.

I reread this book after learning that one of my pastor friends uses this as a textbook for the Friendship Seminars he gives. I had forgotten how good it is.

Table of Contents (abbreviated)
—5 Ways to Deepen Your Relationships
—The Art of Self-Disclosure
—Neglect This and Watch Your Friends Flee
—The Art of Affirmation
—When Tears are a Gift From God
—Ways to Handle Negative Emotions without Destroying the Relationship
—Six Techniques to Help You Get Angry without Becoming Destruc
Rebecca Waring-Crane
Simple and practical, McGinnis's guide remains accessible despite the 1979 copyright date and his distinctive Christian framing. I dog-eared more than a couple of pages on this library copy to find the quotes below and a few more.

"All of us, at one time or another, have periods of temporary insanity. A fine line divides our functioning mental system from the world of unreality, and all of us cross over it occasionally."

“In ways we do not fully understand, self-disclosure helps us to see things,
Afton Rorvik
Feb 19, 2015 Afton Rorvik rated it it was amazing
I first read this book shortly after it came out in 1979. I loved it then, and I still love it today. Lots of practical ideas for building friendships using Jesus as the model for learning to love. The author writes this in his preface to the second edition: "While doing the original research, I read the New Testament several times (and have done so once again while doing this revision), trying to understand the principles and techniques Jesus demonstrated in each of his encounters with people." ...more
Jan 06, 2013 Chelsea rated it it was amazing
I've always stayed away from books of this genre because I thought they would be cheesy and laughable, but this book was actually very interesting. There were many points that I had already thought of on my own, but the explanation and examples helped me to understand different aspects of relationships more fully. It is also done with a Christian foundation, in that it is not bogged down with scripture or preaching, but instead uses the Bible and Christian faith to support its arguments, which I ...more
May 05, 2014 Cindy rated it it was amazing
Shelves: favorites, finished
Biblical based advice on friendships. Advise that may surprise you that at once you thought was beneficial only to find detrimental to your relationships. Highly recommend to my friends and my children!!
Kelly Murray
This is one of the most important books I've read. I picked it up a few years ago at the second-hand bookstore at my local library. I think it was 10 cents or so. It's really remarkable. It re-teaches everything we figure is already implicit within us...and then I realized how you can never have too much knowledge on how to properly care for people. The bottom line is that relationships with those close to you HAVE to be cultivated and nourished in order to survive. We may think we're already a ...more
Apr 29, 2014 Eabdolelah rated it really liked it
This book is so inspiring. What I like about this book is that the author combines many of the good books for famous authors within it. It is amazing.
Chris Priestley
Jan 05, 2015 Chris Priestley rated it did not like it
Humanistic pop-psychological self-help only made worse by quotes of Jesus proof-texted in alongside Freud and Jung.
Mateusz Zań
Jun 10, 2014 Mateusz Zań rated it it was amazing
To przyjaciele czynią Cię szczęśliwymi, nie bój się być wobec nich szczery i mów im co czujesz. Przede wszystkim jednak poświęcaj im czas i słuchaj ich uważnie.
Kyle Horton
Feb 25, 2016 Kyle Horton rated it really liked it
Seminary book - fair - some helpful tips, fast read
May 15, 2014 Stephanie rated it liked it
Decent book on developing relationships.
Jun 15, 2016 Rick rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Practical self-help book. It will help folks [even if shy or introverted] to form strong relationships.
Jun 23, 2010 Carlie rated it it was amazing
Wonderful book. Not the kind of thing I usually read, its honestly a how-to/self help manual on relationships. But, truly, the author is engaging, funny, insightful and for its genre its very enjoyable to read. I'm keeping it on my shelf as a handy reference. The author pointed out a couple of areas where I can learn better friendship skills and did so with aplomb and keen wit. McGinnis has inspired me to read How To Win Friends And Influence People, the classic tome on the subject.
Venessa Martens
Jun 06, 2012 Venessa Martens rated it it was amazing
This book gave me a new perspective on relationships and how they work. As a teenager, I had a very selfish expectation of the relationships I was involved in. I expected my needs to be met and didn't think about what I could give. This book taught me to look to others and meet their needs before thinking about my own. Sounds like something I was taught in Sunday School :) True principles, no matter which source they come from, are the most timeless. Great read!
Oct 08, 2008 Ashley added it
Great book on relationships! Sometimes you dont even realize the dumb things you are doing in your relationships and why things dont work out. The longer you have a relationship with someone the more you should talk, not less. There was a study in the book that talked about a married couple that onle talked a TOTAL of 17 minutes out of an entire week. This is a great book and recommend to anyone who has friends or would like to ;)
Todd Miller
Jan 06, 2014 Todd Miller rated it it was amazing
I've read this a couple times now and always leave learning something new. I'm going to write a more complete review later but this book is a must read for anyone wanting to understand how to develop a deeper relationship with wife, children, and friends.
Mar 25, 2012 Julie rated it it was amazing
This was a great book talking about relationships and friendships. The author is a counselor who deals with many types of people with many different stories. He talks about how important friendships are and how it's important to love and be loved and even to love yourself. Another great thing about this book is that he relates a lot to Christ and how he had the friendships and was able to love everyone.
Anita Byrne
Jul 12, 2011 Anita Byrne rated it it was amazing
Aside from the Bible, this has been the most helpful book I've ever read. It taught me how to reach out to other people and allow them to reach out to me. There are many books about gaining friendships but most of them smack of manipulation. This book bases friend-making on the life of Jesus. How did He make interpersonal connections?
Jan 19, 2013 Amy rated it it was amazing
I First read this book when I was a teen.... It made such an impact on me that It has been with me ever since!! I am so delighted to know that it is still in print. If you have a soon-to-be-Graduate in your life, this is an excellent gift!! A great book to start one's life library. Or for that matter, it is a fantastic read for anyone of any age!
Jemimah Lieow
Apr 21, 2013 Jemimah Lieow rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Found this book in a church library; it caught my attention once I started reading it.
This book gave a lot of useful tips to improve friendship, it puts a lot of facts that are happening, but I've never read it in words, into words.
Thanks for putting effort into writing this book Mr Alan Loy McGinnis.
May 05, 2010 Kimberly rated it really liked it
Recommends it for: Everyone
Recommended to Kimberly by: Ida Hood
Shelves: 2010-list
I'm loving this book, though its taking me forever cause I read it in small chunks. My friend Ida loaned it to me and it contains a ton of valuable information of relationships.

My full review at:
Dec 11, 2013 Karen rated it it was amazing
Sometimes my memory is incorrect, but I believe we read this in our Marriage and the Family class in college. My fiance (and now husband) and I read it. We still refer to it from time-to-time when talking to young couples about marriage and relationships.
Apr 26, 2012 Grace rated it it was amazing
Haven't read this in a few years, thought it was time for a re-read. A good decision, I think - I'm learning so much from this book that I don't even remember reading the last time.
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