How to Win Friends and Influence People

How to Win Friends and Influence People

3.98 of 5 stars 3.98  ·  rating details  ·  74,184 ratings  ·  2,940 reviews
YOU CAN GO AFTER THE JOB YOU WANT...AND GET IT! YOU CAN TAKE THE JOB YOU HAVE...AND IMPROVE IT! YOU CAN TAKE ANY SITUATION YOU'RE IN...AND MAKE IT WORK FOR YOU! For more than sixty years the rock-solid, time-tested advice in this book has carried thousands of now famous people up the ladder of success in their business and personal lives.

Now this previously revised and upd...more
Paperback, Special Anniversary Edition, 288 pages
Published October 1st 1998 by Gallery Books (first published 1936)
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How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale CarnegieThe 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. CoveyThink and Grow Rich by Napoleon HillGood to Great by Jim CollinsEmotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry
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1st out of 238 books — 399 voters
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303rd out of 8,132 books — 38,228 voters


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Community Reviews

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Brent
This is an incredible book. I've heard people mention it for years and years and thought the idea of it was so stupid. The way some people talked about it made it seem like it was a book for scoundrels or for socially awkward people. I didn't want to be either, so I didn't want to read it. Finally, a great friend of mine recommended it to me and I started reading it. This is a book for people. It's not about being evil or admitting you're nerdy; it's about how to get along with people. Anyone wh...more
Mark  Landon
Wonder if he knew people would be reading this 75 years later, I doubt it, but when you tap into fundamental aspects of human nature in a way that helps people that's what happens. Like another book I just read Emotional Intelligence 2.0, it's one of those titles that have become part of the cultural lexicon (like CATCH-22). How to Influence was written in 1936, it is based on courses in public speaking that had been taught in adult education courses by Dale Carnegie since 1912 (and to put to re...more
Ivan
Sep 27, 2007 Ivan rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: people
Three things about this book surprised me and I liked it a lot more than I thought I would.

One - it seemed pretty much timeless. Not much anachronism here, because language still serves the same purposes as ever, and people still want basically the same things they've always wanted. I liked the examples taken from Abe Lincoln, etc.

Two - the techniques described in the book aren't duplicitous. We all try to do what the title says, just like everyone else, whether we're admitting it to ourselves...more
Conrad
Dale, saying people's names often when you're talking to them, Dale, doesn't make you popular, Dale, it makes you sound like a patronizing creep.

This book is probably really handy when you're trying to befriend kindergarteners, not as much adults. It's also aimed at salespeople and not regular humans.
A.
It's considered corny to read books like this, but that kind of cynicism is ultimately limiting and counterproductive. My dad forced me to read this book and it was one of the main things that pushed me out of my shyness and made me an amicable person.
Viraj
Jun 29, 2008 Viraj rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Everyone who is even slightly motivated and wants more in and from life...
Recommended to Viraj by: Dr. Gadgil
Shelves: self-help
Overall:
A well written book with a lot of examples, including many of good folks from the history and many without any citation, but none-the-less seem real. The examples are written so that the message goes across well. Repetition is avoided. The stuff mentioned is pretty obvious and simple, but important and often ignored. Worth reading multiple times as the preface recommends.

TEXT DELETED

105 SIX WAYS TO MAKE PEOPLE LIKE YOU
PRINCIPLE 1: Become genuinely interested in other people.
PRINCIPLE...more
Jared Smith
At the end of the Great Depression, Dale Carnegie wrote one of the benchmark self-help books of American literary history. He encapsulated the formula to “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” in the midst of a market downturn, to put it mildly. His title, How to Win Friends and Influence People, was probably used to win and influence book sales rather than cleverly and accurately describe the content of his book. Simply, it is a misnomer. With chapters on considerate social intercourse and since...more
Catherine
Nov 16, 2007 Catherine rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: everyone and their dog
Shelves: instructional
This book is a guide to life. I think several people should be required to read this book at least once. Teachers, emotional teenagers, employers, employees, husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, friends, neighbors, politicians etc...

I truly found this book oddly entertaining. Although it is a self-improvement type book, I couldn't put it down. Through the examples of many famous and successful people throughout history, this book teaches us how to work with others and be nice. I sincerely believe...more
Dave
Sep 07, 2007 Dave rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition Recommends it for: Anyone
Shelves: non-fiction, classics
I have read this book many times over the years. As I was looking through my bookshelfs this afternoon, I found a very old copy of this classic. It must have come from my father's library as it is marked as a 77th printing - probably printed in the early 50's. I LOVE old books...

The best tidbit to share from this book, is if you want people to like you, emulate a dog. Carnegie says: "When you get within ten feet of him, he will begin to wag his tail. If you stop and pat him, he will almost jump...more
Ashlie
Aug 09, 2008 Ashlie rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Everyone
This is one of the most profound books to understand others behaviors and in teaching you skills to communicate effectively with others. A lot of the information is quite basic, but the examples and the message is quite profound. It has certainly made me stop and reevaluate my responses with others in the past few weeks when needing to work through difficult professional and personal situations. I think this book is a must read and will continue to be timeless classic book.
Kendel Christensen
Mar 09, 2011 Kendel Christensen rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition Recommends it for: All human beings that care about their relationships with others
Save the gospel itself, and my mission president, this book has been the single most influential thing in my life. Insightful? Yes. Timeless, Absolutely. But for someone who had no social skills to speak of until his mission? Transformative.

Here are just a FEW of the nuggets in this amazing book:

“Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him.”
(Emerson, As quoted by Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People, p. 31)

“You will never get into trouble by admitting t...more
James
Why did I read this book?

We’ve all heard of it. But none of us have ever really read it.

And I know why. It was originally published in 1936. How can it possibly be relevant in 2009?

Plus these types of advice, self-help, new-agey textbooks reek of banal, trite, clichéd, stereotypical drivel. We’re too good for that. They seem a little cheesy at least. They’re all like The Secret, right?

We don’t want to sip on watered down hotel iced tea and listen to Zig Ziglar. We want to take a toke of a high-...more
Daron
Sometimes I felt this book was a bit too . . . "used-car-salesmanshippy". There are some good ideas in it, but there are also some things which felt like they were extremely disingenuous. I don't like FAKE people. There are some ideas in here which are quite fake.
Paul
Jul 13, 2009 Paul added it
Utter dreck! Anyone who thinks this book offers important wise advice on friendship is an idiot.

Dale Carnegie was nothing but a huckstering sophist, and a very repulsive one at that. For those of you who may not know, Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People is a handbook on how to exploit friendship for the sake of financial and political gain. Now fans of this book (why such people are allowed to read, much less vote, I do not know) will say this book helped them overcome their shyne...more
RC Langilll
I've read this book through several times over, but I carry it with me on my daily commute so that I can go back and read another chapter if it's been a while.

This book has been out there for some time, but its advice still applies today. This is my best example of how his advice helped:
I was arguing with a bank branch manager who was telling me that the check I was depositing was going to be subject to special holds. At the time, not being able to use the money wasn't critical, but it was incon...more
Shelly
When discussing a problem with my husband he said, "If you're just venting, that's fine. However, if you are looking for me to give you a solution I have this book you could read that would help." I sarcastically replied, "What is it? "How to Win Friends and Influence People?". He said, "Yes!". So... later in the week I grabbed the book and started reading it. It's going slowly, but so far a very good book. It's going to be the kind of book that needs to be read over and over again to fully appr...more
Frank Cardenas
The writer did not get it wrong when he chose the title 'How to...', an amazing timeless book you can read to help you in your everyday life.
No matter what your profession is, you will find that the principles described by the author apply to any situation you find yourself in.
I read this book a long time ago and I still remember the satisfaction I experienced on each page I was devouring: easy-to-read, with very realistic examples and full of simple techniques, this book should be made mandat...more
Arminius
This book lays out a plan you can use to succeed in life.

To make friends:
Never criticize, show sincere appreciation, find out what others want and show them how to get it, become interested in them, smile at them, and know their name.

To Influence:
Praise and appreciate, ask questions instead of giving a direct order, give the other person a reputation to live up to, and make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.
Molly Cecile
As corny as the title might sound, this book should be a must-read on everyone's list. After reading this book I am so surprised that schools don't teach the simple methods for people to get along with each other and have less conflict. On top of it, any person going into any sort of business must read this. The advice that this book gives is more valuable than a college education on business. While reading this book, I've already had a lot of success, whether it's dealing with work, friends, or...more
Nathan
My dad gave me this book when I was a teenager and it changed my life. It comes off to some people as a book on how to manipulate people, but that is really far from it. In my experience there's really no way to put the practices this book preaches into effect with your life and not become someone who actually treats people better as a result. Funny how treating people better leads to leadership, friends, and influencing them. It's not an accident.

I've read the book at least 3 times, with anothe...more
Monk
As the book jacket will tell you this has been on shelves for seventy some years for a reason. I suppose it's a good primer for people who lack some social skills, though I found it to be more of a refresher. It's all pretty much common sense and Carnegie definitely had insights, though I find the book to be dated in some respects. SOme examples he calls are very relevant in even the modern times we live in, but I find some of his opinions to be sunshine-tinted. The world has become in some ways...more
Krista
I loved this book, it should be required reading in high school. The book is broken down into four parts and the chapters are short and easy to read. Carnegie uses clear examples (true stories) of each principle to show how to apply them. I found the stories to be interesting as well as inspiring. If you want to be liked and understood, this book is for you! And it turns out that if you want to be liked, listened to and understood, you have to genuinely like other people, listen to them and seek...more
Nikki
I absolutely LOVE this book. I read it in college, and it was a great way for me to improve myself, but it didn't make me feel bad. It made me have more confidence and become a more well-rounded person. Highly recommended, no matter how introverted or extroverted you view yourself.
Johann
Like the book Bonds That Make Us Free, its one book that focuses our relations with other people and really puts the question of who you are and how we psychologically analyze ourselves. Really worth the read and doesn't get dry very easily.
Megan
I actually haven't finished it and don't know if I will. I've been listening to it at work, so I can't say how far I've gotten, but so far, it's nothing I haven't heard before: put yourself in his shoes, don't criticize, smile, and focus on the other person instead of yourself. These are all great and timeless principles as the other reviews have said, and the book isn't boring, so I gave it a three. I just don't know if I need to finish the book if I've already gotten the gist of it.
Jennifer
Feb 19, 2008 Jennifer rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Everyone
In high school feeling like a nerdy sophomore, I discovered this book on our bookshelf at home and thought it would hold the key to great recognition and popularity for myself, all my troubles would be answered. I immediately grabbed it and began reading. I was surprised in that it held no secret to great popularity at all, however I did find in it, one of the most enlightening, amazing books I had ever read, and still feel that way to this day. It changed my focus, it changed my heart, it chang...more
K.D. Oliveros
Apr 15, 2009 K.D. Oliveros rated it 3 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Jillian
Shelves: self-development
This is one of my life-changing books! The rules still apply even if this was written my decades ago. I read this when my former (first) company sent of to Dale Carnegie Seminar. Although the seminar did not require reading this book from cover-to-cover, I did and I like the short stories supporting each rule. I still remember the very first one: Do not criticise, condemn or complain. It is very true if you want to win a friend but it is different if you want to keep a friend for there are times...more
Micah Elliott
Paul Graham (Hackers and Painters) has mentioned that an important read for preparing to start your own business is How To Win Friends and Influence People. I'm happy to report that this gem from 1936 is timeless and truly life-changing. I believe Paul's reasons for the recommendation include: the importance of charisma, general rounding out one's personality, and finding ways to get responsiveness from people by making them feel good.

My real intent in making this review is to get you to pick up...more
Wijayanto
It is kind of a tips book, according to the way he wrote, it is also easy to be understood. You will even know the inside only by reading the page of contents. He divided it into 4 big chapters. The first one is “Teknik-Teknik Dasar Dalam Menangani Manusia”. “Enam Cara Untuk Membuat Orang Lain Menyukai Anda” is the next chapter, and it is followed by “Bagaimana Memikat Orang Lain Mengkuti Cara Berpikir Anda”, and the last one is “Jadilah Pemimpin: Bagaimana Mengubah Orang Lain Tanpa Menyinggung...more
Bailey Coleman
This book gives pointers and life lessons that help you to communicate with other people. It tells about how you can more easily handle people. This helps you to become more sucessful and have better realtionships. It says that someone that wants to be recognized for thier achicvements needs to have a true interest in other people. When yout truly interested in the other person, the other person feels important and wanted. They are more likly to enjoy your company. It also explains how each pers...more
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Dale Carnegie's Lifetime Plan for Success: How to Win Friends and Influence People & How to stop worrying and start living
How to Win Friends & Influence People (Paperback)
How To Win Friends and Influence People (Hardcover)
How to Win Friends and Influence People
How to Win Friends and Influence People (Hardcover)

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Dale Breckenridge Carnegie (originally Carnagey until 1922 and possibly somewhat later) (November 24, 1888 – November 1, 1955) was an American writer and lecturer and the developer of famous courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking and interpersonal skills. Born in poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People, fir...more
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“It isn't what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it.” 3,731 people liked it
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