The Things Between Us: A Memoir

The Things Between Us: A Memoir

3.38 of 5 stars 3.38  ·  rating details  ·  92 ratings  ·  27 reviews
The Montgomerys of Framingham, Massachusetts, are among the last of a dying breed -- New England WASPs who effortlessly combine repression, flamboyant eccentricity, and alcoholism. Fragmented by drink and dysfunction, the family had avoided assembling under one roof for more than a decade. But when Big Dad, the patriarch, was diagnosed with stomach cancer, the siblings all...more
Hardcover, 222 pages
Published August 28th 2006 by Free Press (first published 2006)
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Candace
It makes me said that I have to give such a bad review for a memoir, but it has to be done. I couldn't truely get into it until half way through the book. There was 220 pgs. and it wasn't until about pg 100 did the writting style start to get better, and able to follow. For the first 100 pgs she was going back and forth between past and present without any warning that she was having a flashback. At which point I had to reread parts in order to understand what was going on. She would go into too...more
Darlene
This memoir by Lee Montgomery was one of the most raw... most honest stories I have read in a long time. Her memoir begins with her return to her native New England to help her parents cope with her father's stomach cancer diagnosis. Her story alternates between the past and the present and through her very honest self-examination, we travel with her through the very complicated relationships which always exist in families... especially families where one of the members is an alcoholic. Her memo...more
Jessica
I picked this up looking for something lighter than my usual fare (memoirs & other non-fiction re: cancer, buddhism, hitting bottom & surviving the unthinkable). It's packaged as a dysfunctional family memoir with an emphasis on the drunk mother, but it's really a book about an adult daughter coping with the death of her father from cancer. Yes, the family is dysfunctional, yes the mother is drunk all the time, but that's not what the story is about at its core. For me, this book is abou...more
Lori
Jul 17, 2009 Lori rated it 3 of 5 stars
Recommended to Lori by: $1 bookstore shelf
Shelves: 2009july
The Things Between Is was billed as an addition to the "drunken mothers" genre. And it was, sort of. But the real story is how an adult child deals with her father's descent toward death. The drunken mom is present -- both in the "now" and in the flashbacks to childhood -- but she's not the central story. (A Q&A with the author even talks about how her mom hijacked the book -- right down to every review and her photo on the cover.)

I expected Things to be a painful read, and it wasn't, at all...more
Victoria


Lee Montgomery is absolutely brilliant in balancing truth/perception, anger/understanding, wisdom/emotional trauma in her memoir. She is a personal friend of ours--but you too will know her well after reading about her family.

"Here is an excerpt from the publisher's notes:
Montgomery's stunning memoir vividly evokes the often unspoken bonds between family members -- bonds made of memory, love, and disappointment. Heartbreaking, lyrical, and frequently hilarious, "The Things Between Us" hums with...more
Lori
If you've ever had a parent die of cancer, this book will really hit home. Funny, irreverent, touching, and, at times, profane; free-spirited Lee Montgomery takes us through diagnosis, treatment, hospice, and, ultimately, the passing of her beloved father, all while reminiscing about her crazy, mixed-up years with her alcoholic mother, her gardening dad, and her older brother and sister. A very well-written memoir; descriptive and vivid and highly engaging. You'll be left with a deeper appreciat...more
Shari
This should really go on my "tried to read it but couldn't make it through" shelf. I got about halfway through. I ultimately found the subject matter too difficult; I am getting ready to move about 500 miles away from my parents, and reading what it's like for someone when their father is dying just isn't my cup of tea right now, and probably not ever.

But I would also say that this book just wasn't gripping. I've read books with difficult subject matter before, and when the story pulls you in, y...more
Tamara Greenleaf
Loved this book, especially since I'm an ex-pat New Englander. Montgomery writes with such a compelling sense of place that her characters are infused with it. They could not exist anywhere else. A beautiful, sad and wise story that will resonate with anyone who is facing the death of parents with whom they had troubled relationships.
Erika
The book was written with honesty, and it was an interesting look into one episode of this writer's life. I got the feeling there was much more the author could have said, but she stayed on topic instead. Not the kind of book you just can't put down but not the kind of book you can't even finish either.
Diana
Not a great read, but a good one--it is about the author facing the death of her beloved father, with her alcoholic mother in the background wringing her hand, and in the mix her beautiful, somewhat detached sister, and her analytical brother.
Featherbooks
Well-written, sad family story of the cancer death of author's beloved father and the reactions & recollections of other family members, including her long-drunk mother, clutching a mayo jar of gin & mint as she shuffles along on her purple walker, singing her heart out.
Jennifer
Memoir is not my preferred genre, and with so much great fiction on my to-read list, I rarely read more than 1 memoir a year. With that said this is highest rated memoir on my list - I highly recommend it. For myself, I tore through it finding it engaging and true.
Kim
Montgomery grew up in Framingham around the same time I did...familiar places, and happenings...
Leslie
This book is described on the cover as being a memoir about a drunken mother. It's not. It's a memoir about the author losing her father to cancer.
Megan
Touching, sad story of a woman losing her father to cancer. Not your run of the mill dysfunctional family memoir.
Laurie
True story about a woman who returns home to help her father dying of cancer amidst the drama of her alcoholic mother. Decent read, but not a memorable read for me.
Karen Bradbury
Helping me to understand the family life of denial in an alcoholic home ......
Serena
really searching for reasons to actually finish this book. it seems remarkably unspecial to me--not that it's badly written, but it's very unfocused...nor is it actually about the things it purports to be. i can't see trying to buy this as an editor and actually getting past the review board. perhaps standards have changed...perhaps i need to finish it.
Jobie
Good if you're into the "My father is dying of cancer" books.
Seriously, I got about halfway through and then skimmed the rest. Tough subject matter. Quotable. And that Mom! Man! She reminds me of my grandmother, Toots.
karen
This book was good, but very hard to read. It made me very emotional to think about my parents ever passing. I don't recommend this if you don't want to confront these issues or have to use a hanky while you read!
eliza
Very moving account of a Framingham WASP family falling apart as the patriarch dies. I just lost my grandfather, a neighbor of the Montgomery's, and grew up spending a lot of time in this world.
Micaela
A humorous and endlessly quotable memoir, despite its seemingly-depressing subject matter. It had me rolling on the floor with laughter at certain points.
Linda
I am a fan of the memoirs of ordinary people from dysfunctional families and while this is not A Girl Called Zippy or The Glass Castle, it was a good beach read
Karen
Dec 02, 2007 Karen marked it as to-read
Winner of the 2007 Sarah Winnemucca Award for Creative Nonfiction (Oregon Book Awards). I like the cover. I definitely want to read this one.
Jennifer
Good memoir- explores seeing your parents as "people" versus just parents-I cried
Jennifer
Downright depressing, but I stayed with it.
Mary
Hiding problems is never the best way to deal.
Mary Pat
May 08, 2013 Mary Pat marked it as to-read
Susan
May 06, 2013 Susan marked it as to-read  ·  review of another edition
Alicia
Apr 12, 2013 Alicia marked it as to-read
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The Things Between Us: A Memoir (Paperback)
The Things Between Us: A Memoir (ebook)
The Things Between Us: A Memoir (ebook)
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Lee Montgomery is the author of The Things Between Us, A Memoir (Free Press, August 2006), Whose World Is This? Stories (University of Iowa Press, September 2007), and Searching for Emily: Illustrated (Nothing Moments Press, October 2007). The Things Between Us received the 2007 Oregon Book Award in creative nonfiction and Whose World Is This? the 2007 John Simmons Iowa Short Fiction Award.

She has...more
More about Lee Montgomery...
Woof!: Writers on Dogs Whose World Is This? Absolute Disaster: Fiction from Los Angeles Glimmer Train Stories #82 Transgressions: The Iowa Anthology of Innovative Fiction

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