Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence
by Rosalind Wiseman
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Queen Bees & Wannabees should be every teenager and parent's Bible: My first impressions of Queenbees & Wannabees by Rosalind Wiseman were, after seeing the 'Mean Girls' film. I thought it could be a fiction novel in the same witty vain as 'Confessions Of A Teenage Drama Queen' by Dyan Sheldon, and movie that is just as fabulous, which I both loved with Lindsay Lohan. <br /> <br />However, what I found to my great relief was a non-fiction book about teenage life for both girl...more
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Read in September, 2006
This is a book I read after seeing the movie Mean Girls, which is a fictionalization of this actual book, although it is a nonfiction book, not a novel. I soooo wish this book had been around when I was in school. It was a revelation to me and explained the grand majority of social interactions that happened to me back then. The language is easy to read and precise without being technical or psychoanalytic.
Good suggestions for getting out of bad situations -- bullying, gossiping, dri...more
Good suggestions for getting out of bad situations -- bullying, gossiping, dri...more
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Read in June, 2008
recommended to Andrea by:
Desi & Katie!recommends it for: everybody!!!
I thought that this book started strong. But my problem with self-help books is that I grow bored of the topic. This book kept me until the last couple of chapters that I felt was pretty much common sense. But I feel strongly to urge every woman with or without daughters to read this book. It applies to those raising daughters and those still trying to grow up (which, let's be honest, is most of us). It helped me take a good look at myself and my "growing up as a girl" experience....more
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Read in May, 2008
I enjoy pop psychology, and I liked the movie Mean Girls (which was based on this book), so I thought I'd give it a try.
Reading this did not give me horrible flashbacks to my middle-school years. :-) But it did give me some interesting insights on roles girls play. Queen Bee, Sidekick, Wannabe, and Target are all pretty obvious, but Banker was a surprise to me. I assumed she was a girl who tried to buy popularity or friendship. Actually, she is someone who collects embarrassing or dam...more
Reading this did not give me horrible flashbacks to my middle-school years. :-) But it did give me some interesting insights on roles girls play. Queen Bee, Sidekick, Wannabe, and Target are all pretty obvious, but Banker was a surprise to me. I assumed she was a girl who tried to buy popularity or friendship. Actually, she is someone who collects embarrassing or dam...more
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Read in March, 2007
I (obviously) am not the parent of an adolescent girl, but one of my colleagues recommended this book to me since we are starting to see some clique-ishness in the older girls at the school where I serve. The book has a very particular audience (parents), and sometimes the author's preachy tone and manner of simplistically classifying types of girls or situations rubs me the wrong way. I also tend to think that much of this is common sense. However, I suppose for some parents, this would be a...more
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Read in January, 2005
Since there isn't a synopsis let me type it.
"Helping your daughter survive cliques, gossip, boyfriends and other realities of adolescence. Parents can make a difference in girl world. Do you feel as though your adolescent daughter exists in a different world, speaking in a different language and living by different laws? She does. This groudbreaking book takes you inside the secret world of girls' friendships, translating and decoding them so parents can better understand and help t...more
"Helping your daughter survive cliques, gossip, boyfriends and other realities of adolescence. Parents can make a difference in girl world. Do you feel as though your adolescent daughter exists in a different world, speaking in a different language and living by different laws? She does. This groudbreaking book takes you inside the secret world of girls' friendships, translating and decoding them so parents can better understand and help t...more
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Read in January, 2005
The book is well written though, and helpful in accepting the reality that my daughter is going through the reality of gossip and cliques, and other potentially destructive issues teen girls face.
In my own middle school years, I chose to not belong to a clique, which is the choice that I have been helping my daughter navigate as well. My son (now in college), who also went to a private school, shared his advice that the most important thing to do for our daughter was what we did for him -...more
In my own middle school years, I chose to not belong to a clique, which is the choice that I have been helping my daughter navigate as well. My son (now in college), who also went to a private school, shared his advice that the most important thing to do for our daughter was what we did for him -...more
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Read in April, 2008
I enjoyed this book, even though it gave me an ulcer every time I picked it up. ;)
My adolescence was not tumultuous. I was a typical teenager, but perhaps more grounded than some, and immune to some of the drama that went on. Reading this book was a walk down memory lane, the worst parts of it--it reminded me of the times when I felt least secure in myself.
Because my children are clearly prepubescent, I think the book was easier to read than if we were in the throes of 14/ 15 year old girl r...more
My adolescence was not tumultuous. I was a typical teenager, but perhaps more grounded than some, and immune to some of the drama that went on. Reading this book was a walk down memory lane, the worst parts of it--it reminded me of the times when I felt least secure in myself.
Because my children are clearly prepubescent, I think the book was easier to read than if we were in the throes of 14/ 15 year old girl r...more
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Read in January, 2008
Enlightening. I was hesitant about this book's thesis. But after refection I agree that a girl's position in the social heirarchy can affect whether she becomes a perpetrator, bystander, or victim first among her relationships with girls and then later among her relationships with boyfriends.
I also now see the limitations of a "just say no" campaign.
And besides just scaring parents by iluminating the realities of Girl and Boy World in Adolescence, Wiseman also offers tips, tech...more
I also now see the limitations of a "just say no" campaign.
And besides just scaring parents by iluminating the realities of Girl and Boy World in Adolescence, Wiseman also offers tips, tech...more
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Read in March, 2006
I think this should be required reading for anyone who has teenage daughters, works with girls, talks to girls, has anything to do with girls at all, or ever plans to. With extraordinary honesty, clarity, fairness, and accuracy, Wiseman reveals the hidden heights and depths of "Girl World," a messy battleground where emotions and risks run at extremes. When I picked up my 8th grade journal after having read this book, I was shocked to find all of the scenarios Wiseman describes in thi...more
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Hahaha.
My friends from ninth grade can attest to the madness that ensued after I read this book. The movie "Mean Girls" was apparently based off this book, although there is little to no similarity to the screenplay of the movie. Attitudes may be the same, but I don't think the movie really had a right to consider itself based off the book.
I know it is odd, reading this book when I am a teenager myself, but I found it strikingly interesting. It was just so... true. After reading i...more
My friends from ninth grade can attest to the madness that ensued after I read this book. The movie "Mean Girls" was apparently based off this book, although there is little to no similarity to the screenplay of the movie. Attitudes may be the same, but I don't think the movie really had a right to consider itself based off the book.
I know it is odd, reading this book when I am a teenager myself, but I found it strikingly interesting. It was just so... true. After reading i...more
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I read this and informed my children that they are not allowed to age any more. It's too scary to contemplate.
I was inspired to read a few in this genre when Natalie's second grade group seemed to be already starting down this road. How depressing. I thought it would be later! What I learned is that while it is definitely starting, it's going to get a lot worse.
An interesting study of girl cliques, why they exist, their component parts. Given that the author runs a large education p...more
I was inspired to read a few in this genre when Natalie's second grade group seemed to be already starting down this road. How depressing. I thought it would be later! What I learned is that while it is definitely starting, it's going to get a lot worse.
An interesting study of girl cliques, why they exist, their component parts. Given that the author runs a large education p...more
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Read in June, 2008
Wow! Imagine watching a PBS Nature episode dissecting the social dynamics of a wolf pack, but instead of wolves, it's teenage girls. Instead of packs, its cliques. The complex social structure of boys is covered as well. I learned so much about what my daughter is going though, and so much about why I had the experiences I had! Every parent must read this book! The author gives the reader (parent) real tools to deal with bullying, dating, lying teens. The most fascinating point made by th...more
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Honestly, watch Mean Girls! This book was the inspiration for the film and I think Tina Fey hit the nail on the head with the Queen Bee dynamic.
Unfortunately, this book fails to address other groups besides middle/upper class white straight girls. There is little to no mention of any other racial demographic. I was disheartened that the author chose to relegate the topic of sexual orientation to a mere small chapter, sandwiched between heterosexual dating and sex.
Overall, it's quite obviou...more
Unfortunately, this book fails to address other groups besides middle/upper class white straight girls. There is little to no mention of any other racial demographic. I was disheartened that the author chose to relegate the topic of sexual orientation to a mere small chapter, sandwiched between heterosexual dating and sex.
Overall, it's quite obviou...more
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Read in October, 2005
This is a great book to help our daughters navigate their way through the psychological warfare they are sometimes exposed to by other girls in adolescence. I read it when some girls were giving my daughter a hard time at the beginning of middle school. It does a very good job of examining the inner working of a "popular" clique and how each personality fits and how they work to exclude others and often one of their own. I spent a lot of time discussing this book with my daughter an...more
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Read in January, 2007
you don't have to have a daughter to read this book. if you remember being a teenage girl, or if you don't, or even if you never were one (maybe especially if you're not female), this is an interesting read. Like looking in on an insulated culture and learning what it all means. and how it shapes adults and how they interact with each other. not having a daughter personally, that's what i took away from this book. although i have to say i'm not sure how anybody turns out alright!
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Read in February, 2007
recommends it for:
parents or people working with teenagers
This is a great book if you want an inside look at the lives or teenagers. This book focuses on girls, but is also helpful with boys. As a teenager, you would never want an adult watching out for you to read this. As an adult working with or parenting a teen it is extremely useful. Rosalind offers tips for interacting with your teen. She also provides a solid understanding of their world. Scary as it may be -- some things have not changed that much since we were in school.
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Read in August, 2008
Entertaining, no-nonsense and even some real common sense. Though I felt some of the book was really only relatable to older girls (middle and high school), there was some great information.
Useful for kids as young as first grade because some of the "girl crap" starts early. I liked the beginning of the book much more than the end but I highly recommend this book to any parent of a girl. I even gained some insight on those women who never grew out of girl world :)
Useful for kids as young as first grade because some of the "girl crap" starts early. I liked the beginning of the book much more than the end but I highly recommend this book to any parent of a girl. I even gained some insight on those women who never grew out of girl world :)
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Read in March, 2008
recommends it for:
parents of pre-teens; teenagers
I've been browsing through this book for a few weeks now. It's really not for me. It's more for parents of teenagers. I understand the tone of what the author is trying to say: talk to your kids if you see they are having problems with friends. Talk to your kids before they end up in social situations such as the ones listed here. But I can tell you, when I was 13 and 14 years old, I didn't want my parents involved in my social interactions with my friends.
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Nowhere near as good as Reviving Ophelia or SchoolGirls, but probably written for a different audience.
I enjoyed the insight into the individual girls, but felt that some of the parenting tips were a little off. If nothing else, it's at least a decent read for parents to start figuring out what is going on at school.
As a psych major, and an eventual teacher, I'm glad I read it, but I'm not sure how many of its tips I would take.
I enjoyed the insight into the individual girls, but felt that some of the parenting tips were a little off. If nothing else, it's at least a decent read for parents to start figuring out what is going on at school.
As a psych major, and an eventual teacher, I'm glad I read it, but I'm not sure how many of its tips I would take.
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