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The New Bottoming Book

3.84 of 5 stars 3.84  ·  rating details  ·  596 ratings  ·  36 reviews
Almost a decade ago, the first `Bottoming Book` taught tens of thousands of people that bottoming - being a submissive, masochist, slave, `boy` or `girl,` or other BDSM recipient - is as much an art as topping. Since then, the growing popularity of BDSM, and the blossoming of the Internet as a source of information and connection, have created a whole new universe of possi ...more
Paperback, 2nd (revised & updated) edition, 200 pages
Published January 12th 2001 by Greenery Press (first published February 1st 1994)
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Domination & Submission by Michael MakaiScrew the Roses, Send Me the Thorns by Philip MillerSM 101 by Jay WisemanThe Loving Dominant by John  WarrenDifferent Loving by Gloria G. Brame
Best BDSM non-fiction
6th out of 56 books — 49 voters
Opening Up by Tristan TaorminoThe Ethical Slut by Dossie EastonSex at Dawn by Christopher  RyanThe Good Vibrations Guide to Sex by Cathy WinksGuide to Getting It On! by Paul Joannides
Best Nonfiction Sex Books Ever!
10th out of 87 books — 47 voters

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Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 1,345)
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I'm having so many emotions right now after finishing this, and I hope I can reign them in a bit during the following series of anguished ramblings. Actually, I think I might let loose a little, just because reading this was a personal experience and I don't know how else to talk about it without feeling weird.

I really should have read this earlier. If I ever become some kind of kindly kinky elderly mother figure, I will pass this book out to anybody who I think needs it. There's so much vital i
Joe S
Dec 28, 2007 Joe S rated it 4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: all of my future boyfriends, from now on
Shelves: nonfiction
If you want a how-to book, this isn't it. If you want a why-for book, this is your baby. I wish I would have found this book years ago. For people who are already in the game, it's a quirky, fun reaffirmation and reminder of the basics. And while you won't learn the practical importance of, say, different commercial-grade leathers, I think the authors do a pretty good job of guiding readers to the psychological space you'll need to find once you do snag a good top who knows his way around a dung ...more
mary k
Although I appreciate Easton's work, I feel that I run into the same wall every time I read something by her. Every point she makes are ones I already know, in a way; it's all common sense, lessons learned through living, and epiphanies we all come to at some point. We all know that in order to be the best bottom we can be, we must communicate with our top. We must respect our top. We must respect ourselves. Etc. We all are very aware of these things, but every now and then, we need reminding. W ...more
Mark Stone
Jul 29, 2007 Mark Stone rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: tops, bottoms, switches, and anyone else interested in BDSM sexuality.
Shelves: sex
When my girlfriend and I took our questions about our burgeoning interest in BDSM to our more experienced friends in Washington D.C., they recommended that we start with this book, and it's sister The New Topping Book. The authors write with wit and compassion, making this a fun, sexy, and comforting read.

It's important to remember, however, that this isn't a 'how-to' manual. It won't tell you how to play BDSM games with your lover - at most, there are a few scenes you might find interesting. I
The best thing about this was the former subtitle (removed in this edition): How to Get Terrible Things Done to You By Wonderful People. Astonishingly boring, I thought, given its subject matter.
Hope McCormick
Helped me understand the psychological side of submission better than anything else I've read on the subject. Very good book for the curious.
Kristina Kopnisky
The companion book to "The Topping Book". The next level after reading SM101 & Screw the Roses. Silly illustrations. Amusing anecdotes. Good advice.
Angel S
This book is really good for someone interested in bottoming that is still new to it. I'm not new to it, but it was still a good read.
Dec 29, 2007 Sienna rated it 4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: anyone who has sex
Shelves: sexuality
Again more validation and a new insight into my own personal power dynamic in a sexual relationship.
Beautiful, easy-to-read, vivacious prose; it almost seems like you're face-to-face with Dossie and Janet (the authors)!

Great introduction to playing submissive/bottoming roles in sex and BDSM. Great tips on where to start, what kinds of sensations and scenes you could explore, the healing and spiritual potential of BDSM, and what to look for/look out for in yourself and your sexual partners.

Additionally, the updated introduction and additional section about online communities and cybersex reall
Nicoll Campbell
Aug 22, 2012 Nicoll Campbell rated it 4 of 5 stars
Recommended to Nicoll by: Internet Research
Very Interesting - Whilst I learnt a lot about a many different aspects of Bottoming. I found Part 1 to be the most beneficial. Preconceptions vs Truth. The Net. Getting in touch with you.My copy has just about every second page highlighted or annotated in Part 1.

I thought Part 2 whilst extensive in the types of play ,I felt that the authors reminiscing of their conquests detracted from the actual "playing". The mention of "waxplay" had me sit up but then there was nothing about it(I will have t
Christopher Munroe
There may come a time in your life where an, in hindsight, obviously abusive relationship leaves you completely disassociated from your body and sexuality.

In times like that, I should think, it is only right and natural to go back to your roots. Reconnect with yourself on a fundamental level, remind yourself who you are and what it is that you like. A person who tore you apart is one thing, allowing their influence to keep you from the fullness of life even after they’re gone is quite another. Y
I can see that maybe when this book first came out nearly 20 years ago that it was breaking through barriers that existed between kink communities and the mainstream world....but as a Millennial who grew up in a sex-saturated era with immediate access to the internet at all times, coupled with coming from a sex-positive family and peer culture, I have to say there wasn't a lot here for me.

This definitely wasn't a "how" book, but more of a "why?" The authors' insights into various aspects of S/M,
Paul Hampson
Absolutely essential, along with the Topping book, for anyone interested in exploring their sexuality in a BDSM manner. From finding partners, pre-scene negotiations to the first session, Dossie Easton takes us on a journey, with informative anecdotes, in acquiring the necessary skills to be an excellent bottom.

Can't recommend it enough!
One must start from the bottom and work one's way up.
May 03, 2011 Besha rated it 4 of 5 stars
Shelves: 2011
Read during a SFSI shift along with The Sexually Dominant Woman. The Topping Book is much better organized and offers really excellent theory. I’m skeptical of these two authors--The Ethical Slut put me off open relationships for years—but I really enjoyed reading this.
The New Bottoming Book is a good starter book for those interested in the sub aspect of a BDSM lifestyle, either as a bottom or a top. This is not the end all, be all, but gives a good idea of what can be expected, real life scenarios, and a basic understanding of the lifestyle.

I like the authors use of real life experiences to illustrate situations and expectations. I came with a better understanding of what I want from the lifestyle. Good way to begin.
I thought it was amazing. It got me thinking about my kink in a new way and allowed me to vocalize fantasies that I've had in my mind waiting to come to the surface. I would definitely recommend this to anyone looking to get into the world of BDSM and is interested in being the one receiving the "punishment." There's so many facets to the world of BDSM and some education is definitely a good idea.
Rich Daley
Seeing the other side was very useful, although I learnt little that I didn't get from the companion volume. As always, Easton & Hardy are confident, fun and responsible authors, although their need to include spirituality (thankfully in a dedicated chapter) in everything is sometimes a bit hard work.
May 23, 2013 Jasper added it
Definitely a good book -- a decent middle-line between a "newbie" guide and something that those of us further along into the scene can still enjoy. Very empowering, and it gives you a lot of specific things to think about!
♆ BookAddict ♨ ✒ La Crimson Femme❇ ♐
I decent how to book for newbies interesting in subbing. This is a start. The book is written in a light and easy manner. It explains scenes and the thought process to those who are just looking into this lifestyle.
Canice Brown-Porter
Another informative book about the D/s lifestyle that's geared towards the bottom, although Dominants may want to read and glean a little info from also.
Jun 28, 2012 Brady rated it 3 of 5 stars
Shelves: kink
A very respectfully-written introduction that is suitable for those just getting started. I wish they would write a book like specifically for couples!
Troublesome Bladderbag
Jul 14, 2012 Troublesome Bladderbag marked it as bagrat-topagwa
If you'd like to know what I thought of this book, please contact me directly and I'd be happy to discuss it with you.

All the best,

- TB
Aug 17, 2009 Barb added it
In order to be a well informed top, I felt I needed to continue to understand bottoming better...this book was so helpful...
Things that I already knew. Pretty basic. But the same writers of Ethical Slut. They make reading fun!
Mar 12, 2009 Tinea rated it 3 of 5 stars
Recommended to Tinea by: it was a gift!
Shelves: sex
A very light overview of BDSM practices, psychology, and culture, focusing on the why and what of subbing.
Pretty basic, but entertaining and left me wanting more, so I guess that's a good thing.
Eli Poteet
This book made me feel beautiful and powerful as a bottom, I love it.
decent tidbits, but felt like this could have been very compressed.
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