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Get Me Out of Here: My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder
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Get Me Out of Here: My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder

3.87  ·  Rating Details  ·  4,375 Ratings  ·  247 Reviews
With astonishing honesty, this memoir, Get Me Out of Here, reveals what mental illness looks and feels like from the inside, and how healing from borderline personality disorder is possible through intensive therapy and the support of loved ones. A mother, wife, and working professional, Reiland was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder at the age of 29--a diagnos ...more
Paperback, 436 pages
Published August 4th 2004 by Hazelden (first published June 1st 2002)
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Alicia It's very honest. A rare look into the thought processes of someone with a disorder that is difficult to understand. I recommend reading it.

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 3,000)
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Petar X
Reading this I raged at the author, well not quite rage, at it was the author's rage that infected me. She spread it like stinking manure on a field. Everyone, medical professionals, family, fellow patients and readers got enveloped in the stench.

The author wrote the book from the 1,000 page journal she kept of her progress through therapy and it is only on reflection you see through the madness to the woman suffering terribly from Borderline Personality Disorder. She wavered between pyschosis
Dec 31, 2011 Sara rated it really liked it
I thought about not putting this on my reviews, because my penchant for mental health recovery memoirs is getting embarrassing, but -- this one was really good. Not falling into the fallacy of the "moment I was saved" nor falling into the "but I was a victim of my bad brain chemistry/ abusive childhood," Reiland narrates rather unemotionally what it takes to get from crazy to sane. In her case what it took was a loving, patient partner, a committed, ethical therapist who didn't buy into the heal ...more
Jan 17, 2012 tee rated it liked it
I guess this is why there aren't many memoirs written on Borderline Personality Disorder. This book was hard to read; Reiland being entirely unlikeable and frustrating for the majority of it. However, it was written fairly well and it did end on an uplifting and inspiring note.

Besides Reiland constantly pissing me off which began in the first quarter of the book when her therapist "threatened" to send her to a state psych ward and she in turn wrote a horrid little paragraph of how rotten that wo
Huong Doan
Jun 12, 2013 Huong Doan rated it it was amazing
“What is it like to have Borderline Personality Disorder?” It is like having a different person inside you whom you have subconsciously neglected for a long time.

It is true that I have Borderline Personality Disorder. It is true that I have been gone through what Rachel had suffered: self-destructive thoughts and actions, depression, abuse, manipulation, black and white thinking, hatred, and disintegrated personality. Tiredness, emptiness, chaos, and intense passion, I’ve had them all.

Sep 30, 2008 Jennifer rated it it was amazing
This was probably the best book I have ever read on Borderline Personality Disorder. Told from the perspective of someone diagnosed with it, it did not pull any punches and gave a very honest, revealing look at what the disorder is like for the sufferer and for those around him/her. Best of all, it went into great detail about the relationship between therapist and patient that eventually led to the CURE. BPD is commonly called the "garbage ground" of psychiatric disorders - professionals do not ...more
Mar 14, 2016 Lily rated it really liked it
Among the ideas from this book that are likely to stay with me:

"For all these years, you’ve lived under the illusion that, somehow, you made it because you were tough enough to overpower the abuse, the hatred, the hard knocks of life. But really you made it because love is so powerful that tiny little doses of it are enough to overcome the pain of the worst things life can dish out. Toughness was a faulty coping mechanism you devised to get by. But, in reality, it has been your ability to never
Jan 05, 2013 Katherine rated it it was amazing
I read this book having been recently diagnosed with borderline personality disorder myself. To begin with, I was honestly unsure whether I wanted to read it, incase it made me feel worse about my diagnosis. However, since it was about someone's "recovery", I thought that it would be worth reading, in the hope it may inspire me.

For the first 300 pages or so, I didn't like it. It was one of those books that I didn't want to continue reading, but I couldn't put down. I couldn't bear to think that
Janet Morris
Get Me Out of Here is a brilliantly written book about Rachel Reiland's struggles with Borderline Personality Disorder. Reiland does a great job of verbally expressing the pain and anger that this disorder caused her, as well as helping to explain why she developed the disorder (her childhood experiences). Some may be shocked by the intensity of her anger and outbursts, but one must keep in mind that these outbursts are just a sign of her problems with BPD. She was lucky that she had an understa ...more
Unfortunately there was a gap between my reading this on a long, half-focused plane ride and my managing to find the time to sit down and write a review. Also regrettably, there was an even longer gap between my reading of this book and my reading of The Buddha and the Borderline: My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder through Dialectical Behavior Therapy, Buddhism, and Online Dating, which would have been a great compare-and-contrast. Like Kiera Van Gelder, Rachel Reiland writes a raw ...more
Christine Olson
Aug 14, 2007 Christine Olson rated it it was amazing
Realistic, hopeful, compassionate, and validating....Good read for anyone who has loved and/or lived with someone who struggles with Borderline PD inclinations or anybody who has BPD. Its autobiographical nature prompted me to feel more empathic for (and forgiving of) those with BPD, but alsomade me more keenly aware of the need for establishing clear limits or boundaries as a means of establishing healthy, enduring connections with family members, friends and co-workers who have BPD tendencies. ...more
Jun 28, 2007 Debra rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: Anyone interested in psychology/clinical work
I found this to be a very compelling memoir by a woman who had successful therapy for borderline personality disorder, a disorder that is frequently stigmatized and thought to be "untreatable." As someone training to be a clinical psychologist--but largely unfamilar with BPD--I found this a very good book from which to learn more about the disorder in general and about a particularly powerful therapeutic relationship between Rachel and her therapist.
Feb 04, 2015 Kristi rated it did not like it
Dreadful. Don't read this if you have BPD or know someone who does. The author sounds like she has narcissistic personality disorder as well as BPD and her behaviour is extreme - not like the 'average' borderline. The so called therapy she describes as well is very old fashioned and dated so I feel this could be dangerous to people trying to get help with the disorder. It also perpetuates the myth that BOD sufferers are awful people which is very harmful, I wish this book could be taken off the ...more
May 03, 2011 Erica rated it it was ok
Shelves: nonfiction
This memoir is less about BPD than it is the narrator's weird obsessive relationship with her therapist. Not recommended.
Gabriel Azevedo
if you have borderline personality disorder, pick this book up now. you need this. this is the book youve been looking for. this is it. the journey from start to definitive finish. not all of us will have a happy ending like rachel. but reading this now has given me some fresh hope, knowing that it IS possible, that this is not a death sentence, that this is not a cancer in remission, that it has a beginning and that there can be an actual end to it all.

this book is emotional. it doesnt hold bac
Jul 23, 2015 Sarah rated it liked it
I have so many mixed feelings about this book. Of course I found it hard to read because I suffer from BPD myself and this book was written from the perspective of a person that had a lot of anger issues and suffered a lot of trauma in her childhood. There was a lot of similar content for me and that is why it took a little bit longer to read, but I did come out with this gleaming bit of wisdom : IT TAKES A VILLAGE TO HELP A PERSON WHEN THEY ARE DOWN AND IN NEED, ESPECIALLY WHEN SUFFERING FROM M ...more
Hannah Wingfield
Apr 20, 2013 Hannah Wingfield rated it liked it
Mental health memoirs have been one of my favourite (sub?) genres for at least a decade now, but this is only the second I have read that specifically addresses Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I’ve always been more than a little cynical about whether mental health diag-nonsenses (to paraphrase Girl, Interrupted, which is of course the other book I have read on BPD) are nothing but a label for a set of symptoms – after all, unless you can pinpoint a condition as having one underlying cause ...more
Jun 13, 2012 Jessica rated it liked it
I was recommended this book by a friend at uni. We're all student psychologists and are obviously fascinated by everything to do with mental health.

Add to this the fact that I currently work with a young man with BPD, and I couldn't wait to read this one.

I enjoyed this book, I really liked hearing about the individual experience of BPD, from her perspective, rather than more externally as if from a text book, I thought it was a great way to show people what it's really like, that it's an experi
Ellie [The Empress]
Jun 02, 2015 Ellie [The Empress] rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: Anyone with some interest in BPD and mental problems and memoirs
4.75 | No Spoilers

The following quote is from the epilogue of the book and it speaks about it in general terms.

Tempting as it may be to draw one conclusion or another from my story and universalize it to apply to another's experience, it is not my intention for my book to be seen as some sort of cookie-cutter approach and explanation of mental illness, It is not ab advocacy of any particular form of therapy over another. Nor is it meant to take sides in the legitimate and necessary debate withi
Aug 06, 2011 Ron rated it really liked it
A harrowing tale of one of the worst illnesses that can strike any human being, Reiland's account strikes me as accurate--I dated a BPD once--but it fails a bit in terms of literature. It is a fairly quick read that is often as compelling as the best novels, has a very powerful emotional affect on its readers, yet manages just as often to be a bit tedious and dull (which may just be a part of the pathology). The repetitive pattern of anger and violent outbursts and self-loathing became a bit too ...more
Aug 02, 2010 Ev rated it really liked it
This book opens a lot of doors to a better understanding of what exactly a Borderline Personality Disorder is. The author lets the reader in on her private life, reveals her struggles, the good, the bad and the ugly. You learn how a wife and a mother deals with a mental illness and how it can be cured. When you are reading that amazing story you feel like you are really there, like you are really going thru it. She could not have been anymore open with her struggles than in this book.
This book i
This is an amazingly well-written and brutally honest book of one woman's courageous journey from the breakdown and hospitalization that brought about her being diagnosed with Borderline Perosonality Disorder and then through two more hospitalizations and the four years of intense therapy (with an amazing psychiatrist) to begin to see and acknowledge the reality of her past and the "why" of how she got to be who she is and the painful, slow (one step forward two steps back) and grueling hard wor ...more
Jun 27, 2011 Jeannie rated it liked it
Recommends it for: anyone who has or knows someone with this disorder
Recommended to Jeannie by: Alexandra Simpson
This is a very heartfelt and deeply personally written book. I struggled through the middle of it though, it felt like she wasn't making any progress and I found that painful. This is probably the best book I've ever read on Borderline Personality Disorder. I found it fascinating, scary and enlightening all at the same time.
Jun 28, 2015 Cindy rated it did not like it
Having completed this book, I am convinced that it was partially or wholly fabricated. Rachel Reiland lacks a personality and drive and comes across as a wooden vehicle for showcasing every symptom of Borderline Personality Disorder and the medications she tries. She is a vehicle to try to convince mentally ill people that they either don't need medication or that medication is an easy step to take. She is a tool meant to assuage families that their loved one won't be a burden forever. She tells ...more
Nov 29, 2008 Meno rated it really liked it
Fascinating story about the years long struggle to overcome Borderline Personality Disorder. A case study for the validity of Attachment Theory.
Feb 17, 2016 Stephanee rated it it was amazing
This book was incredibly informative. Reiland fearlessly relates her struggle and is able to guide the reader along during her four-year transition toward a healthier mind. The transitions are not awkward and choppy as I might have expected - Reiland gives enough detail to help the reader understand her actions and thoughts. I'm interested to know how she recounted the story if she had no further contact with her therapist - perhaps from her journals. I recommend this book to anyone interested i ...more
This was such an incredibly sad but hopeful story.

As a lot of you know, I am interested to the point of obsession in memoirs about mental health. This is my first encounter (reading-wise) with borderline personality disorder, a very confusing and frustrating mental illness. It's a huge interest of mine because this is what my best friend's sister suffers from.

Though seemingly less destructive than bipolar disorder (just given the experiences of the author in this book compared to Marya Hornbach
Diane Yannick
Jul 08, 2014 Diane Yannick rated it really liked it
This memoir, written under an alias, is a great account of living with Borderline Personality Disorder. The narrative flows smoothly and the honesty of the author is commendable. She does not shy away from her suicidal ideations, bed-wetting episodes, sexual struggles, anorexia, or her personally shame-inducing behaviors as a mother, wife and daughter. She gives us insight into how she tore down her life in order to rebuild it.

Growing up with abusive family members contributed to her feelings o
Amy Arsenault
I usually try to avoid reading any reviews of a book before actually delving into the book but from the very first page I had a bad taste in my mouth that I couldn't quite put my finger on so I read some of the reviews around here. I think I finally figured it out- From the very start she sounded like she was trying to play the victim card way too hard and just seemed completely bitter and sarcastic in the worst way possible. I have BPD too and I have had many many problems in my life caused by ...more
Jan 06, 2015 Isabel rated it it was ok
I can't believe why there isn't too much criticism to this book, as having BPD myself, this is painful to read.

First of all, the title, "My RECOVERY from BPD"? I'm pretty damn sure people with BPD can't possibly "recover" from it, it's part of who we are and we somehow learn to live with it.

It is a memoir, but an awful one, through the entire book, it described how she coped her mental "problems" by going to mental hospital, talk to therapist and finally 'recover' from it, sorry this just seems
Apr 10, 2014 Noha rated it really liked it
heartaching memoir that resembles the life of many people around us...
considering the dysfunctional families and the story of being brought up in such conditions is almost a typical scenario for most of the familes.
I wept a lot reading through this book, for I was able to read through my own childhood on many occasions.
the parts related to how she used to view God is very similar to my vision, though until now I haven't made real peace with him. my realization to matters didn't reach that state
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“You survived by seizing every tiny drop of love you could find anywhere, and milking it, relishing it, for all it was worth. And as you grew up, you sought love, anywhere you could find it, whether it was a teacher or a coach or a friend or a friend's parents. You sought those tiny droplets of love, basking in them when you found them. They sustained you. For all these years, you've lived under the illusion that somehow, you made it because you were tough enough to overpower the abuse, the hatred, the hard knocks of life. But really you made it because love is so powerful that tiny little doses of it are enough to overcome the pain of the worst things life can dish out. Toughness was a faulty coping mechanism you devised to get by. But, in reality, it has been your ability to never give up, to keep seeking love, and your resourcefulness to make that love last long enough to sustain you. That is what has gotten you by.” 106 likes
“I couldn’t trust my own emotions. Which emotional reactions were justified, if any? And which ones were tainted by the mental illness of BPD? I found myself fiercely guarding and limiting my emotional reactions, chastising myself for possible distortions and motivations. People who had known me years ago would barely recognize me now. I had become quiet and withdrawn in social settings, no longer the life of the party. After all, how could I know if my boisterous humor were spontaneous or just a borderline desire to be the center of attention? I could no longer trust any of my heart felt beliefs and opinions on politics, religion, or life. The debate queen had withered. I found myself looking at every single side of an issue unable to come to any conclusions for fear they might be tainted. My lifelong ability to be assertive had turned into a constant state of passivity.” 88 likes
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