Pack of Two: The Intricate Bond Between People and Dogs

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Pack of Two: The Intricate Bond Between People and Dogs

3.99 of 5 stars 3.99 · rating details · 1,113 ratings · 130 reviews

At the age of 36, Caroline Knapp, author of the acclaimed bestseller Drinking:A Love Story, found herself confronted with a monumental task: redefining her world.She had faced the loss of both her parents, given up a twenty-year relationship with alcohol, and, as she writes, "I was wandering around in a haze of uncertainty, blinking up at the biggest questions: Who am I wi...more

Paperback, 272 pages

Published June 8th 1999 by Dial Press Trade Paperback (first published 1998)

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Jan 20, 2008 Meave rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: people with hearts

I want my Hoover back. This stupid book is so emotionally affecting, it's all giggles and fond memories and a thousand tissues remembering your life with your first dog. Seriously, I am crying now just typing this and it has been two years since I read the book and 12 years since the dog in question went to puppy heaven.

Living on your own is never as good as you want it to be without a dog.

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Jun 03, 2012 Jane rated it 5 of 5 stars

The first few pages made me wonder whether I hadn't written it myself, so accurately did it describe my relationship with my own sweet one. But her writing is far more beautiful than I could have managed. I still remember the day a friend loaned me this book and at the end of the first paragraph of the prologue I cried. It was that intense and cathartic crying that happens with grief. I really could not stop. It had touched a very deep and solemn corner of my psyche. And later I cried at regular...more The first few pages made me wonder whether I hadn't written it myself, so accurately did it describe my relationship with my own sweet one. But her writing is far more beautiful than I could have managed. I still remember the day a friend loaned me this book and at the end of the first paragraph of the prologue I cried. It was that intense and cathartic crying that happens with grief. I really could not stop. It had touched a very deep and solemn corner of my psyche. And later I cried at regular intervals, every few pages. I had to re-read the book later without tears to enjoy it at a less emotional level.

I didn't think anyone in the world felt as I did or had the type of relationship I did with my dog (and had had previously with my horse). Not only had she encapsulated it in a lovely phrase, "pack of two," but she had also described moments I had cherished such as the way my dog used to stand and stare into my eyes if he wanted to wake me up: so discrete, but so intimate. Like a good and dutiful dog, he would never look me in the eyes unless to request something. He would not be so bold as to stare for no good reason. And although he didn't curl up against my stomach, as another girl dog was later to do, because he would have been too hot and anyway, he was male and not at all sentimental, he did sleep in my bed, just as Lucille did with Caroline. We were not the only ones!

There were so many parallels with our lives: the simultaneous sigh as we drift into sleep, my hypnotic gaze that grows heartstrings to every limb and strand of fur; the pictures – I loved the chance to show 'baby photos' of my darling, knowing it was silly but revelling in both the similarity to more normal familial relationships and the dissonance of this ironic ritual. And she knew the way I had given up on attempting a normal human social life: I once shocked a fellow-dog-lover by telling her I had not even been to the cinema since I had found my dog, which then was around 6 years (now it's 13).

The first chapter is called, "The colour of joy." Do you get that? I used to think that my horse had taught me love and my dog had taught me joy. And she said it!

I could go on for a long time, but I don't want to spoil the book for you. Read it, for your soul.(less)

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Feb 19, 2010 BarkLessWagMore rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: dogs

I found this book all too easy to put down, I'm afraid. I'm not sure why, I guess the reason is the fact that I wasn't a fan of the writing style or the author's extremely neurotic personality. The book, for all of its love of everything dog related, is rather a dreary read and somewhere around the midway mark becomes more of a collection of vignettes about dogs who become neurotic because their owners make them so. It almost makes one feel that to love a dog much makes one incapable of having a...more

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Feb 28, 2013 Nancy rated it 4 of 5 stars

This was a fairly short book, and as a devoted dog parent, I found that it went quickly. This audiobook was narrated by Hilary Swank which added a lot to the listening experience. Pack of Two is a very personal account of the author's relationship with her dog, Lucille, and how it enriched and deepened her life. However, it provides both sides of the dog/human bond, including some of the very special benefits as well as darker aspects that, in some unfortunate cases, became pathological.

There w...more

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Mar 09, 2009 Michelle rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2009-book-challenge, dogs, training-and-behavior

I wasn't quite sure what to make of the book at first. I thought it was going to be along the lines of the McConnell books I've read: trained animal behaviorist giving anecdotes and scientific fact to back up her claims. That turned out to be far from the truth. The book is more about the journey one woman takes after getting her dog, a journey into a discovery of what being a "dog person" is all about. She does explore the bonds between humans and dogs, but from an entirely personal way. It's a...more

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May 23, 2012 Liesl rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: animals, adult-nonfiction, memoir

I wanted to like this book--the premise of a single-woman whose closest confidante and relationship was with a dog and struggles with confidence/self-esteem mirrors my own life. However, despite the book being only around 250 pages, it seemed to drag on and on and repeat the same comments. She constantly worries about what her dog is thinking about her and what others think about her based on her dog's training. She is so worked up over the idea of being the pack leader and showing her dominance...more

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Feb 28, 2013 Nancy rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

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Nov 20, 2009 B rated it 2 of 5 stars

This is the creed one must take whenever one begins to read a dog book, The I’m-beginning-to-read-a-dog-book Creed:

I realize that the lifespan of dogs is significantly less than the lifespan of humans. I accept that when reading a dog book, the chances of me falling in love with the dog and the author then documenting the dog’s death are very high. I affirm that this dog book will make me cry while riding the T. Thus concludes the I’m-beginning-to-read-a-dog-book Creed.

Surprisingly, the dog did...more This is the creed one must take whenever one begins to read a dog book, The I’m-beginning-to-read-a-dog-book Creed:

I realize that the lifespan of dogs is significantly less than the lifespan of humans. I accept that when reading a dog book, the chances of me falling in love with the dog and the author then documenting the dog’s death are very high. I affirm that this dog book will make me cry while riding the T. Thus concludes the I’m-beginning-to-read-a-dog-book Creed.

Surprisingly, the dog didn't die in this book, so that was nice. It still made me almost cry a few times. My issue with this book, and I did like it, I did, but... OK, I own a dog. I love my dog. My dog is my best friend. I like thinking about my dog and talking about my dog and talking to my dog and walking my dog. I'm not obsessed with my dog though. I don't know when her birthday is and don't buy her special doggy ice cream treats on such occasions. Caroline Knapp got her dog shortly after she quit drinking. As when most alcoholics quit drinking, they end up filling that void with another obsession. Most of the time, this is their "higher power", they become super Christian and religious and annoying. I much prefer her route, become obsessed with a dog. I got the sense reading this book though that I was peering inside this intensely aggressive obsession.

There were parts of it that were really nice though regarding the psychology behind our relationships with dogs. I found myself going home and looking at my dog in a different way, our relationship in a different light. I don't know that I agree with all of her ideas about our own psychosis being projected on our dogs though. I think dogs are dogs and sometimes are weird in ways that they are weird, not because we train them to be that way.

Knapp used to write for the Phoenix and lived in Cambridge, so it was cool hearing her talk about all the places she took her dog knowing that I've taken my dog to those same places. The real sad part of the story is not in the story. She died of cancer not too long ago. I wonder if her dog out lived her. I bet she was sad if she did. (less)

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Feb 28, 2013 Nancy rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This was a fairly short book, and as a devoted dog parent, I found that it went quickly. This audiobook was narrated by Hilary Swank which added a lot to the listening experience. Pack of Two is a very personal account of the author's relationship with her dog, Lucille, and how it enriched and deepened her life. However, it provides both sides of the dog/human bond, including some of the very special benefits as well as darker, aspects that, in some unfortunate cases, had become pathological.

Th...more

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Jan 22, 2011 Kelly rated it 5 of 5 stars

I wanted to read this book after reading "Let’s Take the Long Way Home," Gail Caldwell’s memoir of her friendship with Caroline Knapp, who died at 42 from lung cancer. And oh, also, because I love my dog so much and, in the past year and a half, she and I have definitely been our own little “pack of two.” Although Knapp acquired her pup, Lucille, on a bit of a whim to fill the void left by the recent deaths of both parents, the end of a long-term relationship and a newly-won sobriety after 20 ye...more

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May 06, 2012 Michelle rated it 4 of 5 stars

Not what i was expecting; but in a way, better. I didn't mind the neuroses, and I don't believe the author loved her dog 'too much' as others stated. I have experienced the absolute devotion of 'dog love' and like to think I gave as good as I got. I think the idea posed about unconditional love giving short shrift to dogs is right on. They deserve more than the the statement indicates.
I was surprised at how well the author handled the topic of her own journey thru dark times...it wasn't boring o...more

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Apr 19, 2012 Rebecca rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: dog

I liked this book a lot. I read it at a perfect time in my life. It was written by a women about her relationship with her dog. She interviews (mostly) other women and their relationship with their dogs. Most of them were also single, so I could relate on lots of levels. Just how hard it is, how your life stops, but it doesn't have to. Just lots of aspects of owning a dog as a women alone. Why some people got one (companionship and/or security) and just their life with it (does your life revolve...more

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Mar 31, 2013 Levi rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: dog owners past, present, and potential

Recommended to Levi by: my mother

Shelves: non-fiction-single-subject

You are either a dog person or you are not. Sometimes it does seem like you can simplify down to this level; dog people will never understand how some people cannot be into dogs, and non-dog people have trouble comprehending how dog owners can put so much energy into their pooches. As a dog person, I have some pity for you if you did not grow up around these animals, but I also understand why the dog world may seem strange and overblown. There is certainly no other human-other animal relationshi...more You are either a dog person or you are not. Sometimes it does seem like you can simplify down to this level; dog people will never understand how some people cannot be into dogs, and non-dog people have trouble comprehending how dog owners can put so much energy into their pooches. As a dog person, I have some pity for you if you did not grow up around these animals, but I also understand why the dog world may seem strange and overblown. There is certainly no other human-other animal relationship that comes anywhere close to the intensity of human-dog. But it is an intensity that is an absolute treat to be part of.

Caroline Knapp explores nearly all facets of the human-dog dynamic with chapters like "Fantasy Dog," "Bad Dog," "Family Dog," "Surrogate Dog," and my favorite, "Inscrutable Dog." That last is the most intriguing to me because it points to how there are limits to what we can know about dogs, as well as what they can know about us. Knapp does a wonderful job at illustrating how dog owners really do have important personal relationships with their pets and their dogs really do have unique, individual personalities. On the flip side, she continually reinforces that these animals are separate, other, apart, just outside of reach of true understanding. And that is okay. It is what makes the warm, happy mystery that much richer.

The book is very personal, and much of it is Knapp's own account of the effects of abrupt life changes that led her to getting a dog somewhat spontaneously. Because of this, there is a lot of focus on the "Surrogate Dog" and "Therapy Dog" areas. She goes to lengths to show that dog relationships are not delusional relationships (well, not for most people, and certainly not if those people take an interest in learning about dogs). She writes about her Lucille, "Out in the world with her, I have found a path to others. At home with her, I have found a way to be alone without the ache." She mentions another person in the book who says, "This is the only nonpolitical relationship I've ever had." As I look across the room at Luca, she chews a rope to shreds and regards me with eyes I can both interpret and misinterpret in an instant. What I can know is that I get pure honesty from her.

But does she give her owners unconditional love? Perhaps, although I liked Knapp scissoring into this over-used concept. It certainly feels right on some levels, but one man from the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals is entirely against it. Knapp sums and extends upon his view that unconditional love "implies that the relationship is essentially nonreciprocal, as though our only role with dogs is to stand there and absorb. In fact, I think the healing power of dogs has less to do with what they give us than what they bring out in us, with what their presence allows us to feel and experience." If a person is not changed for the better by being the master of a dog, then they are sadly not paying attention, or must simply be giving no effort. Relationships with dogs are different than relationships with humans, and it is exactly this reason that canines are so wonderful to touch, smell, praise, challenge, hold, accept, direct, and grow alongside.(less)

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Jul 29, 2009 Ginger rated it 4 of 5 stars

If Oprah picked a book club book on dogs this would be it! I found this book difficult to read at times--it's really a memoir about a emotionally troubled, recovering alcoholic who adopts a dog and discovers inner peace... But her evaluation of what it is to live with a dog as a single city-dweller is amazing. I just adopted my first dog two months ago and her explanation of how we bond and you become interconnected with your dog definitely resonate me. (I'm not sure they would have if I read th...more

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Feb 03, 2009 Christine rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: feeding-the-soul, memoirs

Okay, animal guardians with abnormally close relationship with their pets - read on! This is a lovely book about a woman and her dog. It's loosely based on the woman's life, with some dog trivia sprinkled throughout. Her dialogue regarding preferring the company of her pet versus some people in her life was refreshing.

I read this when I just adopted Ares. I was living with a guy who said Ares had to go after we just adopted him. I chose the dog over the man and we left that day. This book reinf...more

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Dec 10, 2012 Jami rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: audio-ipod-audible, animal-books, life-stories

I thought that this would be just a memoir about the author and her dog; while that was certainly a lot of the story, I was happily surprised to hear the psychological aspects of the human and dog relationship. Her life is woven in, as well as her fears and emotions about her dog and others. I could relate to her feelings about her dog, particularly her fear of being left alone once the dog was gone. I had (and still have) similar fears about my dog, so I can definitely relate to that. It was es...more

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Sep 16, 2011 FairHannah rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: biography, animals

On the brink of getting my own first dog, this was a sentimental look at the bond between dogs and owners. Knapp explored the meaning of the bond between herself and her dog Lucille, as well as the bonds of some dog owners around her. She talks about how the relationship with her dog has helped her to work through the issues with her own past relationships. I don't think this book will be for everyone, as a lengthy discussion of relationships isn't everyone's cup of tea. If you're looking for a...more

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Sep 07, 2012 Kari rated it 3 of 5 stars

I was drawn to this book because the cover featured a view of the back of a woman beside a pointy-eared shepherd mix. Author Caroline Knapp had written a memoir about her battle with alcoholism, called Drinking: A Love Story, and this purported to be a love story about her dog.

I was hoping for a narrative telling the story of her life with this dog, Lucille. Instead, I felt like I was reading a dog version of the early episodes of Sex and the City, when various women and men on the street addre...more

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Dec 23, 2009 Karen & Gerard rated it 3 of 5 stars

I read this book too just because my husband liked it so much but I really didn't care for it. There was very little about the dog, mostly about the owner's feelings and relationships in her life. A lot of it was short snippets about how other dog owners view their dogs as well.

I did agree with her though about how having a dog build bridges to people. When you walk your dog you meet other dog owners who are usually friendly and it seems that neighbors tend to talk to us more when we walk down t...more

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May 06, 2013 Jose M. rated it 4 of 5 stars

[Spanish] Novela/Experiencias/Reflexiones, son las tres palabras con las que puedo resumir este gran (y tan recomendado) libro, aunque abiertamente puedo decir que al final me quedé con esa sensación de carencia.

Tiendo a, malamente, tener expectativas superiores a las que normalmente debería, pero esto radica en que no hubo una diferencia abismal entre mis anteriores lecturas e investigaciones con lo que escribe Caroline Knapp. Es un libro sincero, sobre la vida de la autora, su transformación A...more

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May 04, 2013 Graceann rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: animals

Caroline Knapp, rest her soul, was a woman who worried a lot. She had a lot of problems which she overcame, but many remained, and they are evident here.

Shortly after quitting drinking, Caroline adopts Lucille, who is a brilliant companion and a great conduit to a larger life for Knapp. Knapp makes more friends through her wanderings with Lucille, and even makes some peace with painful issues from her childhood.

But the lady worried too much, and this makes me sad. Instead of saying "my dog and...more

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Apr 12, 2011 Sue rated it 5 of 5 stars

i can see now, why my dear friend in California sent me this book (to ensure that I wouldn't flit off to another book on my long list), and has been bugging me for a long time, to just READ IT!! I called her the day after I finished her, to thank her. There are only a certain group of people who would really "get" this book. Yes, it's well-written, and the only reason I've put it off is because SO many people thrust animal books upon me.
But this one is different. It's about the closeness that so...more

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Feb 17, 2009 Kelly rated it 5 of 5 stars

If you know me, you know I have a high regard for canines. My relationship with Abby, my rescue, is seldom understood; this book reinforced my conviction that people need dogs as much, but much differently, than dogs need people. Knapp infuses the book with anecdotes underscoring the tranformative power of a dog's unconditional love to help a damaged person trust again. I totally relate to Knapp, and mourn her death from breast cancer to this day.

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Jan 31, 2012 Catherine rated it 3 of 5 stars

What can I say, I am loving these memoirs by middle-aged women from Cambridge. I've been walking a golden retriever at one of my jobs, and it's made me want to get a dog as soon as I don't live in a studio and have a steadier income. It was also interesting and moving to read this right after finishing "Let's Take the Long Way Home," a memoir by Knapp's friend Gail Caldwell about their friendship before Knapp's untimely death.

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Jan 01, 2009 Darlene rated it 5 of 5 stars

I recently thought of this book since Marley and me is currently getting so much attention. This book is much better. The relationship between Caroline and Lucille is expressed and analyzed so deeply that I felt someone finally understands the way I feel about my dogs. It is hard to put feelings into words. But I never thought it was overly sentimental just an honest account of the relationship between a human and a dog.

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May 31, 2010 Bill Breedlove rated it 5 of 5 stars

For anyone who has ever lived with a dog, or known someone who lives with a dog, this book is pure joy. The author fearlessly shines a lot on her deep love for her dog, and gives some backstory as well. It is all the more poignant as Ms. Knapp passed away (but her boyfriend took in Lucille, so not to worry). The exploration of the bond between humans and dogs is amazing. Probably the best "dog book" I have ever read.

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Oct 14, 2008 Jean rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: drugs-addiction-recovery, i-like-horses-dogs-etc, relationship-parent-child

Another Caroline Knapp book/memoir that is all in all pretty good - if you are a "dog person" through and through you may rate it excellent - and stems from her experience struggling to feel good enough/loved enough after the accompanying anorexia and alcoholism. Kind of scary if you are a parent, because it seems like this literate, pretty, well educated woman should have had ease and happiness throughout her life. The confounding factor (in all her memoirs/essays) seems to be her mom was lousy...more

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Sep 23, 2010 Laurie Machado added it

This is a terrific book about the personal growth one goes through when adopting a dog -- from the puppy training days to the relatioship she builds with her dog. There were chapters where I laughed out loud and then chapters where I may have gone through an entire box of kleenex. It is a wonderful read and I would recommend it for any dog owner or dog lover.

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Apr 05, 2012 Margaretflynn rated it 4 of 5 stars

This is the second time through this book. I appreciated it more this time around as I have a dog of my own now. The first time I read it, the author was alive and well. She has passed away since then at the early age of 42. Rest in Peace Caroline Knapp and thank you for the thoughtful reads.

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Apr 15, 2011 Amanda rated it 5 of 5 stars

It's no secret that I love my dog. And this book, Pack of Two, really explains everything about that. Is he a replacement for a baby? Do I love him more than I love my husband? Is he just a companion? Why do I watch TV and tell my dog not to do drugs? I don't know. But Caroline Knapp does.

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About Caroline Knapp

Caroline Knapp was an American writer and columnist whose candid best-selling memoir Drinking: A Love Story recounted her 20-year battle with alcoholism.

From 1988-95, she was a columnist for the Boston Phoenix, where her column "Out There" often featured the fictional "Alice K." In 1994, those columns were collected in her first book, Alice K's Guide to Life: One Woman's Quest for Survival, Sanity...more

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“I'm 38 and I'm single and I'm having my most intense and gratifying relationship with a dog. But we all learn about love in different ways, and this way happens to be mine.” — 11 people liked it

“Dogs possess a quality that's rare among humans--the ability to make you feel valued just by being you--and it was something of a miracle to me to be on the receiving end of all that acceptance. The dog didn't care what I looked like, or what I did for a living, or what a train wreck of a life I'd led before I got her, or what we did from day to day. She just wanted to be with me, and that awareness gave me a singular sensation of delight. I kept her in a crate at night until she was housebroken, and in the mornings I'd let her up onto the bed with me. She'd writhe with joy at that. She'd wag her tail and squirm all over me, lick my neck and face and eyes and ears, get her paws all tangled in my braid, and I'd just lie there, and I'd feel those oceans of loss from my past ebbing back, ebbing away, and I'd hear myself laugh out loud.” — 3 people liked it

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