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Truth and Beauty

by Ann Patchett

3.85 · rating details · 8,996 ratings · 1,356 reviews

Ann Patchett and the late Lucy Grealy met in college in 1981, and, after enrolling in the Iowa Writers' Workshop, began a friendship that would be as defining to both of their lives as their work. In Grealy's critically acclaimed memoir, "Autobiography of a Face," she wrote about losing part of her jaw to childhood cancer, years of chemotherapy and radiation, an

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Paperback, 257 pages

Published April 1st 2005 by Harper Perennial

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Best Memoir / Biography / Auto-biography

52nd out of 1,161 books — 1,028 voters

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou

Little House on the Prairie by Laura Ingalls Wilder

Memoirs by Women

46th out of 618 books — 891 voters

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Community Reviews

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Jul 03, 2009

Barbara rated it

· review of another edition

Recommends it for: no one

I didn't care for it, for several reasons. First of all, I didn't think much of the quality of the writing--certainly nothing like Lucy Grealy's in her own memoir. Second, I found both women's behavior in the friendship really strange. Ann seems completely blank in the relationship, never asserting any real personality, and completely enabling Lucy's neediness and selfishness. Lucy just sounded like a black hole, sucking up every bit of attention, affection, needing more and more extravagant ...more

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Nov 07, 2007

Khaya rated it

· review of another edition

Shelves: memoirs, favorites

Wow -- what a fascinating experience, to read "Truth and Beauty" after "Autobiography of a Face" and then to follow up with Suellen Grealy's angry article. I actually thought "Truth and Beauty" was the better book of the two, although perhaps it's not fair to say that because much of my fascination with "Truth and Beauty," at least initially, stemmed from having read "Autobiography of a Face" and the unique, stimulating opportunity to read one p...moreWow -- what a fascinating experience, to read "Truth and Beauty" after "Autobiography of a Face" and then to follow up with Suellen Grealy's angry article. I actually thought "Truth and Beauty" was the better book of the two, although perhaps it's not fair to say that because much of my fascination with "Truth and Beauty," at least initially, stemmed from having read "Autobiography of a Face" and the unique, stimulating opportunity to read one person's memoir and then to read how that person was remembered by a close friend.
First of all, I loved the writing. I forgot I was reading a book half the time; I felt like I was experiencing the friendship and the people myself. Also, while "Autobiography of a Face" was well-written, the story gripped me more than the writing. With "Truth and Beauty," the writing was more singular than the story although I enjoyed both. "Autobiography" explored the dynamics of growing up looking like a freak, while "Truth" described a uniquely intimate? codependent? almost physical? unhealthily close, or just unusually close? friendship -- a more universal topic, but written about in such a fascinating and provocative way.
This book made me think a lot about friendship. When does unique closeness become dysfunctional and unhealthy? When friends fall into the roles of "the sick one" and "the well one," even legitimately, how do they break out of that? And should they? If so, at what point?
It also made me think about sociable, charismatic, life-of-the-party people and whether they're just good at masking and filling (or trying to fill) an inner emptiness. Is it better to be introverted?
Then, reading Suellen Grealy's article (not printed in the book, for obvious reasons) raised even more questions for me. I could empathize with Suellen's feelings of exposure and her sense that her private grief had become something public and marketable. At the same time, at the risk of sounding callous, there's another way to look at this. For example, concerning "Autobiography," she expressed irritation that Lucy had selected her vantage point -- but what do you expect a memoir to be?
In describing Ann Patchett's afterword to "Autobiography," Suellen quoted her sister Sarah as saying, "Where are we in this story?" Ann Patchett was describing her memories of Lucy, which didn't include her sisters, whom she never met while Lucy was alive. I tried to understand -- is she angry about the exposure of Lucy, or about the fact that she wasn't included in this expose?
Then, Suellen reacted to the fact that one reading guide for "Autobiography" questioned her mother's parenting skills, and reported that this was blamed on an inexperienced intern. It's true that this may be insensitive to the family, but once you're going to go there, maybe the book shouldn't have been published at all!
Suellen said that, while she respected Ann Patchett's need to write the book as an artist, she would have preferred that she write it and then bury it somewhere rather than publishing it. Right. I sympathize with Suellen's feelings of exposure, but to hold it against Ann that she spent years writing an excellent book, a book that contributes to the literature canon, and then actually wanted to publish it, is not fair.
This happens to be a problem, as I know because a friend of mine is a writer and a journalist and sometimes angers people who appear in her writings (directly or indirectly) because they feel their privacy has been invaded. It's not that I don't sympathize with Suellen's feelings. I can't imagine what her grief must be like, and then to have it bared so publicly outside of her control. However, "Truth and Beauty" was such a worthwhile book in my opinion that I have a hard time relating to her particular complaints. I guess that any book has the potential to expose and hurt people, especially a memoir. Does that mean it shouldn't be written? Does that mean it shouldn't be read? (less)

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Feb 10, 2008

Colleen rated it

I picked up this book because I read "Bel Canto" and loved it, and loved Ann Patchett's writing style. I also think that, in general, friendship does not get enough respect in our society. There's a lot of attention payed to family and lovers, but not much to friends.
This is the story of a friendship between the author and a woman she went to college with. They both end up at the University of Iowa's Writer's Workshop at the same time, and a beautiful, life-long friendship ensue...more

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Oct 31, 2007

Charlotte rated it

I learned how not to treat friends.

I couldn't believe that Ann didn't end her friendship with Lucy after so many irritating incidents on Lucy's part. I would have backed out of sharing an apartment with Lucy if she had jumped up on me when I first arrived at the apartment.

When Lucy demanded that Ann tell her that she (Ann) loved her most, why did Ann cater to her wishes?

The author did not explain to my satisfaction why Lucy continued t...more

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Oct 03, 2007

Carla rated it

Recommends it for: girlfriends

My best friend Audrey gave me this book at the same time she gave me the book "Autobiography of a face". What a great present. I would read them in the order they are written (autobiography) first. The first book is just an interesting story which is well written. I really liked this book b/c it was mostly about the power of friendship. We all know the power of a good relationship with a significant other but rarely is the power of a female friendship written about. I can relate ...more

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Mar 29, 2009

Kate rated it

· review of another edition

Shelves: memoirsbios, favorites

I can't help but contrast this with Anne Lamott's "Operating Instructions", although totally different premises, but both are primarily novelists who venture into non-fiction to chronicle a relationship. Patchett's clean and crisp writing makes Lamott's simile affection all the more vulgar. And unlike Lamott, Patchett manages to be seem modest despite her success, and largely un-martyred by tragic circumstances. I didn't even mind the patches of one of my very least favorite topics, w...more

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Sep 24, 2008

Kellie rated it

Shelves: 2007-reads, non-fiction, bookclub-books

This was an incredible book about friendship. Lucy Grealy had cancer when she was young, which resulted in several surgeries to remove parts of her jaw. These surgeries left her with a deformed face. Ann met Lucy in her early 20’s. She immediately befriended Lucy and “felt chosen by Lucy and was thrilled.” Lucy had a lot of friends. But it never seemed to be enough. Ann beautifully describes her friend in these words, …”Lucy’s loneliness was breathtaking in its enormity. If she emptied o...moreThis was an incredible book about friendship. Lucy Grealy had cancer when she was young, which resulted in several surgeries to remove parts of her jaw. These surgeries left her with a deformed face. Ann met Lucy in her early 20’s. She immediately befriended Lucy and “felt chosen by Lucy and was thrilled.” Lucy had a lot of friends. But it never seemed to be enough. Ann beautifully describes her friend in these words, …”Lucy’s loneliness was breathtaking in its enormity. If she emptied out Grand Central Station and filled it with the people she knew well, the people who loved her, there would be more than 100 people…If you added to that number all the people who loved her because of her book, all the people who admired her, all the people who had heard her speak or had seen her on television or listened to her on the radio and loved the sound of her odd little voice, you could pack in thousands and thousands of more people, and still it wouldn’t feel full, not full enough to take up every square inch of her loneliness. Lucy thought that all she needed was one person, the right person, and all the empty space would be taken away from her. But there was no one in the world who was big enough for that. She believed that if she had a jaw that was like everyone else’s jaw, she would have found that person by now. She was trapped in a room full of mirrors, and every direction she looked in she saw herself, her face, her loneliness. She couldn’t see that no one else was perfect either, and that so much of love was the work of it. She had worked on everything else. Love would have to be charmed.” To me, this described Lucy the best. I commend Ann for being such a great friend. I am not sure if I would have the patience to be a friend to someone as hard on life and on love, as Lucy. Very moving. I would never had read this if it wasn’t for book club. I am so glad I did. I am going to add Autobiography of a Face to my wishlist. (less)

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Sep 22, 2007

Kim rated it

Recommends it for: Ann Patchett fans

I have just read two books about female friendship back to back--one was the annotated letters of Eleanor Roosevelt and Lorena Hickok and the other was this one, novelist Ann Patchett's memoir of her all-encompassing and troubled friendship with poet Lucy Grealy, who is insecure, needy, and self-destructive, but also incredibly gifted. It is no spoiler to say that Lucy dies at the end, which is given away on the dust jacket and dedication page.

Both books were similar in that one par...moreI have just read two books about female friendship back to back--one was the annotated letters of Eleanor Roosevelt and Lorena Hickok and the other was this one, novelist Ann Patchett's memoir of her all-encompassing and troubled friendship with poet Lucy Grealy, who is insecure, needy, and self-destructive, but also incredibly gifted. It is no spoiler to say that Lucy dies at the end, which is given away on the dust jacket and dedication page.

Both books were similar in that one party to the friendship went on to great heights of fame and accomplishment while the other achieved some success, but not enough to soothe her troubled soul. Inevitably, the career paths of the four women in the two books diverged, and not surprisingly their friendships did too.

I enjoyed Patchett's book more than the Roosevelt-Hickok book simply because there was more text, more narrative, than with some footnoted letters (fascinating though they were). I've never read any of Patchett's novels, but I've read some of her articles and she's a wonderful writer. You get many intimations of her talent in this book, but this book ultimately left me cold. On one hand, Patchett purports to love Lucy, calling her the "pettest of [her] pets," yet to me this book (issued rather soon after Lucy's untimely death) smacked of exploitation. Ann reveals all of Lucy's faults and weaknesses in excruciatingly painful detail, and although I could sympathize with Ann's frustration, I felt betrayed on Lucy's behalf.

I can fully understand why Ann, as a writer, felt that writing would be the best way to work through her grief and make sense of her friendship with Lucy. Perhaps she felt she was honoring Lucy and giving her some of the fame that Lucy always craved. But part of me wishes Ann would have written this all down, stored it in a box, and kept it to herself. Or, at a minimum, disguised this story as a novel, which is Patchett's forte. I must admit that I thought about this book for days after I finished reading it, so it was obviously very effective in its way, but I also felt sad, very sad, that Lucy had to die and that her friend had to lay her soul so bare for the world to feast on. (less)

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May 11, 2008

Kate rated it

The friendship of Lucy Grealy and Ann Patchett was extraordinary and excruciating. I’ve had some remarkable friendships in my life, but this book forced serious introspection. I identify with Ann, and wonder: could I love someone as broken or needy as Lucy? Would I have the courage to stand up to a self-destructing friend? Do I have the fortitude to stick by a friend through gruesome surgeries/recoveries? Or maybe I am more of Lucy--searching for Perfect Love, drawing others in for my own ...more

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Mar 24, 2008

Kang rated it

Couldn't get into this book because there was no real character development. The book is not so much a narrative as a portrait, a portrait both of Lucy Grealy and of the friendship between Ann Patchett and Grealy. But Lucy at the end of the book is pretty much Lucy at the beginning of the book--with more success and a drug addiction. And Ann doesn't really change either, though she arguably matures and is more comfortable in her own skin by the end. The friendship, to be sure, undergoes some...more

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Apr 13, 2009

Kate rated it

I'm adding this book to my shelf of books about writing. As much as it's about friendship and devotion, it's also about writing. I read the whole thing in a day. (Granted, I didn't get anything else done ... ) This is the story of two women who meet in college and become lifelong friends, until one of them dies. It's powerful and moving and awful and beautiful and I don't know what else.

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Mar 10, 2008

Erin rated it

Recommends it for: memoir enthusiasts

Recommended to Erin by: Wendy?

Shelves: nonfiction

I had a tough time deciding how many stars to give this book. On the one hand, after a false start, I read Truth and Beauty very quickly - so it must have been of some kind of interest to me. But when I try to remember what was compelling about it, I have to it admit that it's not much, really. Perhaps the larger-than-life personality of tiny Lucy Grealy? Surely it wasn't the dull reportage of events; the book travels in a fairly linear fashion from first meeting until Grealy's death. Patch...more

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Oct 30, 2007

Jhoanna rated it

Shelves: you-need-to-buy-this-book

I didn't know much about Patchett or Grealy before reading this memoir and I still don't, but I love how Patchett details this intense friendship between two writers and gives you a close look at the writing process, how people develop and why we keep writing. Here's what Patchett has to say of Grealy:

"What the story doesn't tell you is that the ant relented at the eleventh hour and took in the grasshopper when the weather was hard, fed him on his tenderest store of grass all w...more

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Nov 15, 2011

Anne rated it

I relished this book- not only for the beautiful writing but for the sentiment, the love between two best friends. I didn't want this book to end, though I had a sad feeling about how it would end. I now have Autobiography of a Face on my bedside table, but am somewhat reluctant to begin reading it, maybe because I feel like I liked Ann Patchett's side of the story and the way that she told Lucy Grealy's story better than I could like Lucy Grealy's way of describing her own life. I'll give it a ...more

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Nov 15, 2007

Laurel rated it

Recommends it for: women

Shelves: collection

Even though I had never read any of Patchett's novels, I read this when it first came out and was incredibly moved by it...the story of Ann and Lucy's friendship simply resonated with me. I think it would resonate with anyone who has had that one friendship that leaves a lasting imprint on one's life. The title says it all...truth and beauty. No sugar coating of character...no rose colored glasses...people are messy and sometimes we love them all the more for it. I would also recommend readi...more

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Feb 06, 2009

Lindsey rated it

· review of another edition

Shelves: 09-only-not, tru-lyfe, love-to-be-a-hater

I read the first page at the end of one of my breaks and was instantly hooked. This book definitely sucked me in and was well written. It held my attention even during the parts where I was like WTF?! Which there were quite a few parts.

Things were great for me when they were bonding and in grad school. Things didn't make as much sense to me when they were becoming famous authors. Like with the book Comfort I started to wonder if maybe this was a subject I couldn't wrap my brain arou...moreI read the first page at the end of one of my breaks and was instantly hooked. This book definitely sucked me in and was well written. It held my attention even during the parts where I was like WTF?! Which there were quite a few parts.

Things were great for me when they were bonding and in grad school. Things didn't make as much sense to me when they were becoming famous authors. Like with the book Comfort I started to wonder if maybe this was a subject I couldn't wrap my brain around. But then I came to the same conclusion that I did with Comfort: no, it's because these people are assholes that I don't get it. Mostly it was Ann that bothered me.

It seemed to me that Ann threw Lucy to the dogs, especially at the end. It was so easy for Ann to dissect and examine Lucy's feelings of inadequacy, her depression, her constant need for approval. I mean, I guess that's easy for friends to do with other friends. But what about Ann? Why didn't we ever get a dissection of her? In fact, there were a lot of parts of this book where I was like, wait, is this really "A Friendship" or is this Ann Patchett talking about Lucy Grealy?

In friendships there are times where you give and take and sometimes there are people who give more than take and that's cool if both people agree- but Ann Patchett really painted herself as the person who only gives gives gives, while Lucy is really only capable of taking. I don't buy it. Especially towards the end of the book. When Lucy is getting all successful from her novel, there's Ann on the sidelines all excited for her. Then at the end of the book when Ann is getting all this limelight she doesn't have time for Lucy's crap anymore. Would she have been fed up if she'd been getting less press? She didn't want Lucy stealing her thunder but when it was Lucy's time that's not what she was doing, she wasn't living vicariously or any of that she was being 'supportive'.

She told more of Lucy's story than was necessary. There were points where I was confused about what this book was a story about, a friendship? Or her famous friend?

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Dec 27, 2008

Kerfe rated it

Shelves: non-fiction

Addicts are not very likable. At best I found Lucy Grealy tiresome. That was at the beginning of Patchett's memoir about their friendship. By the end my feelings for Lucy had turned into active dislike.

I don't think this was the author's intent. When Lucy dies, she says: "I had thought I could let her go. But now I know I was simply not cut out for life without her. I am living that life now and would not choose it." But she never made me see why this should be. Why...more

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Jan 26, 2012

Sarah Stancato rated it

I had the following literary experience over a period of 10 years: I read Autobiography of a Face by Lucy Grealy, saw Grealy speak at a writer's talk just before she died, learned of her friendship with Ann Patchett when Truth and Beauty came out, read Patchett's The Patron Saint of Liars, and then found my way to finally reading this book, Truth and Beauty. The combination and ordering of these readings made for a rich reflection on the complexities of friendship and the torturous joy that is...more

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Jan 20, 2012

Nitya rated it

Ann Patchett and Lucy Grealey met when they were graduate students at the Iowa Writer's Workshop. Roommates and best friends, they went on to become successful writers. Lucy, first, with her memoir, Anatomy of a Face, documenting her childhood struggle with cancer, which left her face disfigured and led to numerous surgeries throughout her life. Ann was actually the first to publish a book, The Magician's Assistant, but she didn't win the kind of fame and celebrity Lucy had until much later.
...more

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Oct 02, 2011

Robyn rated it

Shelves: non-fiction

I just finished reading this book and while I loved Patchett's style and descriptions, like other reviewers here, I was conflicted about the seemingly dysfunctional nature of her friendship with Grealy. I was heartbroken over the struggles Lucy dealt with, but she clearly kept everyone around her entangled in her neediness and addictions. And to their credit, the various friends showed heroic and unselfish efforts to help her in many ways at every turn. Still, where is the line between enabling ...more

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Sep 09, 2011

Salwa rated it

Recommends it for: fans of Ann Patchett, writers

I'm a fan of Ann Patchett (I've ready the Magician's Assistant, Bel Canto, and Run and enjoyed them in that order) and I was looking for something to read the Saturday before Hurricane Irene was supposed to hit NYC. This seemed like a good one since I was in the mood for memoir/essay rather than fiction. At first Ann and Lucy's friendship is so much about writing and Iowa, the first flush of a deep friendship, grad school, and youth. Lovely. Made me want to write again (in a way that was inspiri...more

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Sep 07, 2011

Wyma rated it

I read this some time ago after I'd read Lucy's AutoBio of her face. It was a fascinating story of high octane friendship, and that friendship is expressed somewhere, even if only slightly in Patchett's novels. It is expressed in the author's love of her narrator in Magician's Assistant, which I just finished reading on my kindle. BTW, by allowing me to try a sample, kindle is assured of a sale of just about all well written books. I can't read a chapter, then wait to get it from the library...more

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Sep 06, 2011

Emilie rated it

· review of another edition

This is Ann Patchett's memoir, sort of. The book details her friendship with Lucy Grealy, another author who she meets in college. The two have a deep abiding friendship that is so sweet; they really are extensions of one another. The jacket illustration on my version has a grasshopper and an ant, and that is the metaphor that Patchett comes back to repeatedly in the book (she being the practical ant, Lucy the carefree grasshopper).
Lucy had cancer as a child that left her lower jaw deforme...more

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Sep 04, 2011

Diann Blakely added it

Patchett’s sole work of nonfiction begins with the early days of the author’s tightly bonded, based-on-literature-and-writing relationship with the poet and nonfiction writer Lucy Grealy. Grealy’s AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A FACE, a memoir of her childhood and adolescence, recounts how she survives cancer and a series of crude, early treatments but is left with a jaw only two-thirds its normal size. Grealy pursues reconstruction via many gruesome failed experiments, and after forty surgeries, she develo...more

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Aug 05, 2011

Angela rated it

· review of another edition

I'm not sure how I feel about this memoir. It's definitely well-written and compelling, and I cared about Lucy and Ann and their friendship. But I'm conflicted about the nature of this book, too. Although Patchett is certainly allowed to write a memoir about a friend who has recently died, I was surprised how often I found myself getting uncomfortable, how often I wondered what Lucy herself would think of Patchett's characterization. This memoir came so soon after Lucy's death (perhaps too soon?...more

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Jun 01, 2011

Melinda rated it

· review of another edition

I have been putting this one off for a while because it's so sad about what happened to Lucy Grealy. But I read it over the weekend and there's so much I could say about it. I read Autobiography of a Face about a year ago and loved it, as sad as it was. And I knew about what the Grealy family (who had all probably been to the end of the ropes with Lucy as well) said about Truth and Beauty--that Ann Patchett was exploiting Lucy's success and death to further her own career, hitching her wagon to ...more

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May 20, 2011

Cyndy Aleo rated it

Shelves: non-fiction, favorites

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. I was absolutely stuck coming up with a title for this review. Sure, there are reviews that I don't have the easiest time titling, and some are better than others, but for this one I am absolutely stumped, because I know that in no way, either in the title, or this review, can I do this incredible book justice.

::: The Basics :::

The author, Ann Patchett, is the author of the New York Times best seller Bel Canto. In Truth and Beauty: A Friendship, she tells the story of her lif...moreI was absolutely stuck coming up with a title for this review. Sure, there are reviews that I don't have the easiest time titling, and some are better than others, but for this one I am absolutely stumped, because I know that in no way, either in the title, or this review, can I do this incredible book justice.

::: The Basics :::

The author, Ann Patchett, is the author of the New York Times best seller Bel Canto. In Truth and Beauty: A Friendship, she tells the story of her life as it involves her friendship with the poet (and author of An Autobiography of a Face) Lucy Grealy, who she met at the Iowa Writer's Workshop.

The memoir begins with the story of how their friendship actually started, as roommates of necessity in Iowa, and details how their friendship unfolds over the next 17 years as both vie for fellowships, move around the country, and finally both become published (and successful) authors.

::: An Incredible Friendship :::

The friendship of Ann and Lucy is extraordinary not only because of their history together, and their success, but because of Lucy and Ann themselves. The two writers were the quintessential Yin and Yang, with Lucy always the center of attention, always popular, while Ann seemed always in the shadows, always the practical one.

Lucy is a mesmerizing person, and as the centerpoint of this book, she is riveting. I can't ever remember reading a memoir as fast as I read Truth and Beauty: A Friendship, because I was unable to control the need to know what Lucy was going to do next. The survivor of childhood cancer, Lucy was forever having surgeries in attempts to reconstruct her face. Patchett's recounting of surgeries as well as the parties and places Lucy went seemed a story that must have a happy ending, even though I knew from the start that they would not: Lucy Grealy died in December 2002.

::: Why You Need to Read Truth and Beauty :::

I don't know of anyone who hasn't had (or at least seen) that friendship with that person that everyone wants to be friends with, and yet needs so much. Lucy Grealy is that friend who just can't be saved, no matter how hard you try, and yet is so dynamic and shines so brightly you can't drag yourself away.

Grealy's life could have been portrayed as a train wreck waiting to happen; with psychological damage left as a result of the damage done to her face from her childhood cancer treatment, her need is overwhelming. And yet, Patchett never makes her seem unsympathetic. Never once do you want her to cut Grealy out of her life, instead, up until the very last page, you hope that she will turn her life around, that Patchett will be able to help her, that she will fulfill the potential that Patchett (and you) know that she has.

::: Overall :::

Truth and Beauty: A Friendship is a riveting read, and one that should not be missed. Even in retrospect, Patchett is able to show the truth of Grealy's life while still demonstrating how much she treasured her friendship. I don't think it is possible to have dry eyes as you reach the ending you already knew.
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Apr 18, 2011

Chanell rated it

it's impossible to not compare Truth & Beauty to Autobiography of a Face - so i'll get that out of the way first. in Autobiography of a Face, language was paramount: how the words described the process was far more important than the actual process. in Truth & Beauty however, the story (and development of the protagonist) is what feels critical, the language is a frame of the story. since Truth & Beauty is far more plot and character driven, it's enjoyable in that it can be a bit of 'escapist' n...more

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Apr 15, 2011

Ciara rated it

i liked this one better than autobiography of a face. this is ann patchett's take on her friendship with lucy grealy. & dude. they had a fucked up relationship. i'm not sure if patchett intends for us to think that she is the victim of grealy's controlling, manipulative behavior--i think not. which is good, because i think it takes two to tango & it was obvious that patchett was entranced by grealy in certain ways. they were close friends for well over a decade (until grealy's death), & you don'...morei liked this one better than autobiography of a face. this is ann patchett's take on her friendship with lucy grealy. & dude. they had a fucked up relationship. i'm not sure if patchett intends for us to think that she is the victim of grealy's controlling, manipulative behavior--i think not. which is good, because i think it takes two to tango & it was obvious that patchett was entranced by grealy in certain ways. they were close friends for well over a decade (until grealy's death), & you don't stay friends with someone for that long just because you enjoy the reflected glow of the popular girl. grealy clearly has her positive qualities that made up for her really fucking obnoxious qualities, at least as far as patchett was concerned.

in a scathing tirade against the publication of this book, grealy's sister suellen wrote something about how patchett was a lesser writer taking advantage of grealy's legacy. i don't know. i prefer patchett's writing. kind of a lot, actually. i blazed through this book in like two hours. i didn't want to put it down, as where grealy's book was a bit of a slog. i wrote in my review of autobiography of a face that this is just my personal subjective take...but that's what book reviews are, right?

because this is a memoir, it must be taken with a grain of salt. these are patchett's recollections & if grealy was still around to offer a counterpoint, maybe she would. but it sounds like this was a really messed up female friendship in a lot of ways--a lot of weird competition & enabling & controlling behavior. i could relate to it because i think patriarchy makes it difficult for women to have healthy, supportive friendships with each other. i have experienced a lot of the behavior patchett describes in my lady friendships. there's a bit about grealy becoming really jealous & insecure when patchett starts dating a poet. grealy is jealous of the poet's success, because she considers herself a poet, & she actually attempts to forbid patchett from dating him. that has happened to me quite a few times with some ladies i have been friends with, & it really sucks.

this book also made me think about how selective grealy was in her own memoir. which is kind of cool. she held back a lot of details that would have overwhelmed the story she wanted to tell in favor of throwing herself a pity party. it made me have a certain amount of added respect for the book she actually wrote, while disliking her a little bit more as an author. it's hard to explain. i think i am still kind of mulling over my feelings about these books, but i think it would be pretty impossible for someone to read one out of idle curiosity without seeking out the other. (less)

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Apr 08, 2011

Lori L (She Treads Softly) rated it

Truth & Beauty by Ann Patchett is a memoir of her friendship with author and poet Lucy Grealy. Grealy attained prominence in 1994 with her Autobiography of a Face, which chronicled her years of brutal radiation and chemotherapy for Ewing's sarcoma in her lower jaw, and the subsequent reconstructive surgeries that were largely unsuccessful. Their friendship begins in 1985 when they are in graduate school until 2002, when Grealy died of a heroin overdose at the age of thirty-nine.

This a...moreTruth & Beauty by Ann Patchett is a memoir of her friendship with author and poet Lucy Grealy. Grealy attained prominence in 1994 with her Autobiography of a Face, which chronicled her years of brutal radiation and chemotherapy for Ewing's sarcoma in her lower jaw, and the subsequent reconstructive surgeries that were largely unsuccessful. Their friendship begins in 1985 when they are in graduate school until 2002, when Grealy died of a heroin overdose at the age of thirty-nine.

This account of their friendship, beginning when they were roommates in graduate school, is told in chronological order through memories, dialogue, and parts of Grealy's letters to Patchett. Patchett compares their friendship to the fable of the grasshopper and the ant. Grealy is the fun-loving, care-free grasshopper while Patchett is the hardworking ant. (But the grasshopper relies on the hardworking ant to save her.)

I have not read Grealy's Autobiography of a Face, but understand that this account shows a different side of her life and her personality. She was a deeply needy, self-absorbed woman who demanded to be the center of attention, either Patchett's or others in her circle. But Grealy also continued to undergo painful reconstructive surgeries. She had a difficult time eating. She lacked self esteem. She was constantly in search of love, or sex. After the great success of Autobiography of a Face she was unable to settle down and write another book. She was disorganized and irresponsible. She was in debt and ignored her bills (or allowed others to pay them).

Admittedly I would not have the patience or tolerance that Patchett had for Grealy, an insecure friend who threw herself into Patchett's arms or sat in her lap, constantly demanding to be the absolute center of attention like a spoiled child. While Patchett does allude to the strain this one-sided neediness could cause, especially when Grealy became a heroin addict, she was also more accepting of all of Grealy's demanding behavior than should be expected.

I actually think this is a deeply moving and totally honest portrayal of Patchett's friendship with Grealy and their relationship. Apparently Lucy Grealy's family was quite upset about Ann Patchett's account of her friendship with Grealy in Truth & Beauty, going as far as to attack Patchett's writing ability, which is absurd. Patchett is a very talented writer who is most certainly not riding on Grealy's fame. (Personally, I knew of Patchett's writing before I even heard the name Lucy Grealy.)

While I understand that the honesty in this account may be hard to read, seldom do people know all sides of a loved one. I'm sure that Grealy showed one side of her personality to her family, while her friends knew a decidedly different aspect of her personality. It may simply be difficult for her family members to accept this side of her life. If anything, Patchett down plays her own successes and accomplishments in comparison to Grealy's.
Very Highly Recommended; http://shetreadssoftly.blogspot.com/

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Cafe Libri: January: "Truth and Beauty: A Friendship" by Ann Patchett	12	9	Jan 30, 2012 10:12am
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About Ann Patchett

Ann Patchett is an American author. She received the Orange Prize for Fiction and the PEN/Faulkner Award in 2002 for her novel Bel Canto. Patchett's other novels include The Patron Saint of Liars, Taft, and The Magician's Assistant, which was shortlisted for the Orange Prize. She is the recipient of a Guggenheim Fellowship and received the Nashville Banner Tennessee Writer of the Year Award in 199...more

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“Writing is a job, a talent, but it's also the place to go in your head. It is the imaginary friend you drink your tea with in the afternoon.” — 85 people liked it

“I was starting to wonder if I was ready to be a writer, not someone who won prizes, got published and was given the time and space to work, but someone who wrote as a course of life. Maybe writing wouldn't have any rewards. Maybe the salvation I would gain through work would only be emotional and intellectual. Wouldn't that be enough, to be a waitress who found an hour or two hidden in every day to write?” — 36 people liked it

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