The Bitch in the House: 26 Women Tell the Truth About Sex, Solitude, Work, Motherhood, and Marriage

by Cathi Hanauer
The Bitch in the House: 26 Women Tell the Truth About Sex, Solitude, Work, Motherhood, and Marriage  
published September 16th 2003 by Harper Paperbacks
binding Paperback
isbn 0060936460   (isbn13: 9780060936464)
pages 304
description "This book was born out of anger," begins Cathi Hanauer, which seems appropriate considering the book's title: The Bitch in the House...more
date added
03-14-07



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other reviews (showing 1-20 of 631)



Ginnie
09/11/07

bookshelves: women
Read in January, 2006
So much better than the title. This is not just a whine by women writers who have it all. Because most women know we can't have it all and have to try to forge happiness anyway. Crack it open and you won't put it down.

My favorites include "Atilla the Honey I'm Home" about a woman who is ultra cool and competent at work and then comes home and takes out all her stress on her family. "How We Became Strangers" about the effect the arrival of a first child has on marital bl...more
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lithereed
lithereed rated it: 3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars
04/05/08

Read in March, 2008
This book provokes a range of responses from readers. Some reviewers call it the "whining of women who have it all," which makes me wonder whether they actually read the book. If having it all means that one has a career, friends, family, and (if one chooses) a partner, then I guess many of us "have it all." I was not aware that if one "has it all" one must not reflect on life and love. The mood of this book was honest, contemplative, and funny. Although the writers...more
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Sharilyn
Sharilyn rated it: 5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars
05/08/08

Read in April, 2008
A collection of 26 essays by women of all ages and life stages. The title comes from Virginia Woolf's concept of "an angel in the house", the traditional mother who sacrificed herself for everyone else in the family. This book condensed basically everything I've been struggling with in the last 10 years or so trying to balance jobs, family, community, etc. Most of the essays were very strong, and all of them were interesting. My husband is now reading it, I think in hopes he will glean...more
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Siki Dlanga
Siki rated it: 4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars
04/15/08

recommended to Siki by: got it from Andre
recommends it for: Pretty
i became interested in this book because a christian guy was raving about it. now i'm raving about the book because it is about women ditching the self-help books for honesty and their honesty about their lives is like thearapy. i love it because it is non-christian - this means that the temptation to hide behind what we should be isn't there. i also like it because it isn't one of those "self-help" books because there are 'no shoulds' or a pretence of having it all together. not every...more
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Lisa
Lisa rated it: 1 of 5 stars1 of 5 stars1 of 5 stars1 of 5 stars1 of 5 stars
11/25/07

Read in November, 2007
Did not really enjoy this. Its depressing to think that women can be so pathetic. Its all about learning from making mistakes or being in situations where you really wonder if these women had any respect for themselves in their past. I find myself wondering if they had been asked to write these papers during their previous life choices, if they would have been full of the same sort of optimism that the current papers have. I want women who are role models for confidence. Non-apologetic. Living L...more
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Laurie
Laurie rated it: 3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars
01/21/08

Read in January, 2008
While the focus is primarily on married people, working Moms and couples with kids, there were a few other voices (non-marrieds, non-kidded) as well.
There were a few one-liners that will stick with me, and generally it was a good for a moment of self-reflection.
However, nothing about any of the short essays was earth shattering, and since they all hit about the same note, it got a little redundant. But it was nice to hear all those female perspectives on living our contemporary life, and how...more
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Joanna
Joanna rated it: 3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars3 of 5 stars
11/04/07

bookshelves: nonfiction
Snippets of autobiographical vignettes, showcasing many different types of women and their various relationships. It was easy for me to empathize with the women and I found myself resenting the men, and in response, my own husband. This was fun while it lasted but I don't think it really was useful. In nearly every case, I wished for a continuation of story. I think I would really each woman to be made the main character of her own full size chicklit novel, complete with picture perfect happ...more
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  1 comments

The Cute Little Brown-haired girl
bookshelves: for-women
If you are a woman you MUST read this. Especially if you are even considering living with a man, getting married, or having children. This is the down and dirty of what all those "fairytales of having the perfect life" are REALLY like. If you have any misconceptions that your life will somehow be perfection if you were to get married and have kids, you need to read this first. And then, g'head and walk down the aisle and have all the little ankle-biters you want. Just don't say I didn'...more
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Inder
Inder rated it: 5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars
09/04/07

bookshelves: personalessays, women
Read in May, 2005
The raw, honest, painful truth is invigorating and scary! I loved this book, and continue to recommend it to my women friends. Several of them report feeling more scared and appalled than invigorated, so read this at your own risk. These women spare no gory details in describing their struggles with marriage, child-rearing, and careers. This book is gritty and real and shocking, and it's also easily the best anthology of personal essays I've read in the past couple of years.
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Paria
Paria rated it: 2 of 5 stars2 of 5 stars2 of 5 stars2 of 5 stars2 of 5 stars
08/08/07

Underwhelming. The stories in this book presented a fairly predictable litany of female complaints about men (they're self-centered, they don't help with the housework, they cheat on you). It was a really oversimplified (not to mention bleak) view of male-female relationships. And not one story featured a proactive heroine! The women in these pieces just put up with the crap their husbands/lovers dished out to them! Which didn't strike me as very feminist at all. Blech.
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Mo
Mo rated it: 4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars
07/16/07

bookshelves: currently-reading
recommends it for: all women
I am not even half-way finished with this book but, so far, it is wonderful! It provides accounts from the lives of a diverse group of women - the single, the married, the divorced, the "willingly other woman" type, the maternal, the childless, the heterosexual, the bisexual, the young, the wise. Very insightful. I was able to identify with a few of the women, whether their feelings are those that I am feeling now or those that I felt in the past.
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Tiffany
Tiffany rated it: 4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars
01/11/08

bookshelves: womens-issues
Read in January, 2008
recommends it for: adults
I read this book last year, and it has stayed with me all this time. Each essay a different woman's perspective on the types things woman are expected to do. I can so relate to many of the voices - why, for example, am I the only one in the relationship with an internal clock that tells me it's time to change the sheets or mop the floor? Reading this made me think about my struggles with being a wife on mother on a societal level. Fascinating read.
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Tonya
Tonya rated it: 4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars
01/15/08

Anyone under 50 who doesn't relate to the issues raised in these essays--work, marriage, children, and compromise--is living in a bubble.

Don't be put off by the title--or by the common misrepresentation (like by Katie Couric on the Today Show) that it's the whining of women who seemingly "have it all." The point is, you CAN'T have it all, and have to try to forge happiness anyway. Crack it open and you won't put it down.
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Aimee
Aimee rated it: 4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars
05/12/08

Read in May, 2008
This was a short story collaboration. I thought there were a nice variety of women from all walks of life talking about their experiences of what it's like to be a woman. The stories that seemed to intrigue me the most were ones that talked about the juggling of career vs. family although I thought the perspectives were all rather interesting to hear. Kind of an insider look at each woman's life. Well worth the read.
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Lisa
Lisa rated it: 4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars
09/19/07

Has a copy to sell/swap — Read in September, 2007
recommends it for: women
My mother-in-law likes to say this sort of book describes "ages and stages." I agree. Read as part of my book club for the September 07 meeting; I enjoyed discussing the different short stories and what they meant for life, love, and relationships over time; things all women struggle with. I really learned from this book that relationships don't have to fit into a pretty box; do what works FOR YOU!
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Cj
Cj rated it: 4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars
04/21/08

Read in March, 2008
I learned a lot from this book. It offers a broad array of life-experiences of women, each essay providing a subtly different perspective.

I believe that any of the reviewers who wrote it off or tried to pigeon-hole it must have failed to read it all the way through. There's no way to synthesize a tidy summary from so many different voices.

This book is a terrific discussion and thought piece.
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Paula
Paula rated it: 5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars
01/24/08

bookshelves: personal
Read in September, 2006
Well, this book tells it like it is. There is no sugar coating in this book which really impressed me. Rarely have I seen a book that I can really relate to in regards to motherhood and marriage and work ect. The stories are brutally honest. These woman talk about things that you can't even tell your friends sometimes. It's nice to know that I am not the only one who is pretty much a bitch.
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Kathryn
Kathryn rated it: 5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars
08/01/07

Read in July, 2007
recommends it for: Lisa, Jessica, and everybody else
Beth recommended this one to me, and let me tell you- it was brilliant. Some of these essays are just so honest and full of fabulous insight on the dynamics of male/female relationships and the choices we make as women. I wish Justin would read several of the essays, since they encapsulate the complexity of emotions I either have felt or currently feel about the path my life has taken.
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Jill
Jill rated it: 5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars5 of 5 stars
06/29/07

Read in January, 2003
recommends it for: All Women Everywhere and Others Who Wish to Understand Women's Experiences
This book is a collection of essays about women and their life choices (of all sorts, traditional marriage and parenting, singlehood, open marriage, single parenting, etc), and the frustrations that can accompany them. The book is wonderfully honest and refreshing. It's been awhile since I have read it, and I am contemplating rereading it, as I thought it was a fabulous read.
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Jennifer
Jennifer rated it: 4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars4 of 5 stars
11/18/07

bookshelves: greatreads
I read this book many years ago and am now rereading it 6 years later as a married woman in my late 20s. It means much more now, as I can actually relate to the entries, where as before, I had no point of reference. It kind of makes me feel normal in my rolls of wife, future-mother, woman, and woman in the working world!
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book data (includes all editions)

avg rating (all editions): 3.68 (460 ratings)
avg rating (this edition): 3.70 (435 ratings)
number of reviews: 86






other editions

The Bitch in the House (Paperback)
The Bitch in the House: 26 Women Tell the Truth about Sex, Solitude, Work, Motherhood, and Marriage (Hardcover)
The Bitch in the House CD: Women Tell the Truth About Sex, Solitude, Work, Motherhood, and Marriage (Audio CD)