Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read.
Start by marking “Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me” as Want to Read:
Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me
Enlarge cover
Rate this book
Clear rating

Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me

by
3.35 of 5 stars 3.35  ·  rating details  ·  1,981 ratings  ·  330 reviews
The Emmy award-winning former executive producer of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report has assembled a stellar lineup of men who have one thing in common: all have been dumped...and are willing to share their pain and the lessons learned.

Relationships end. And in most cases, even the most callow among us, even men, learn something from the experience. Now in this smart...more
Audio CD, Abridged
Published by Hachette Audio (first published February 1st 2008)
more details... edit details

Friend Reviews

To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up.

Reader Q&A

To ask other readers questions about Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me, please sign up.

Be the first to ask a question about Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 3,000)
filter  |  sort: default (?)  |  rating details
Justin
Anthologies can be kind of repetitive, with entry after entry harping on the same tired theme. The theme for Things I’ve Learned From Women Who’ve Dumped Me feels particularly uninspired, as the topic of men bitching about women is arguably the most prominent in the history of literature. But the credentials of editor Ben Karlin (co-editor of America: The Book) combined with the book’s impressive list of contributors (Andy Richter, Stephen Colbert, Neal Pollack, more) piqued my interest all the...more
Jennifer
I know what you're thinking and no I am not and was not a lesbian, not that there is anything at all wrong with that. I picked up this book at ye old Costco, simply because of some of the writers names on the cover: Nick Hornby, Stephen Colbert, Bob Odenkirk, Andy Richter, and Dan Savage, to name a few. Also, I secretly wanted to know what relationships were like for men. As a straight woman, you never can tell. Men are simple in their thoughts and emotions - NOT SIMPLETONS - just not as complex...more
Hannah  Messler
Eh. I'd hoped this was going to be hilarious and insightful, but all the humor was pretty much the same thing all the way through--low-grade irony and drab self-flagellation. Buncha weinerdogs.
Chloe
I heard this in its Audiobook format, which probably led me to appreciate it more than I otherwise would have. Having each author read their short essay was perfect, especially with such instantly recognizable voices as Patton Oswalt, John Oliver and Will Forte. It's a very short read, even the audiobook was barely over three hours long, but one that will have you chuckling all the way. I particularly liked Dan Savage's ode to the vagina that scared him out of the closet and Larry Wilmore's "my...more
doreen
Feb 15, 2008 doreen rated it 3 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: single guy friends, or any guy friends in general
Shelves: memoir, collections
This is a great read. The writing from most of the contributors is funny, interesting and enjoyable; I think there was only maybe one or two works that were sort of "meh" for me. On the whole, I found myself very engaged in the writing, having finished this book in two days (I took a break to watch the first disc of Pee-Wee's Playhouse).

The formatting of each essay/anecdote differs, including comic-strip contributions and and illustration (Marcel Dzama!). My favourite entries include "Lesson #9:...more
Valerie
I was expecting much more from this book. Edited by Ben Karlin - former editor of The Onion, former executive producer of The Daily Show and co-creator of The Colbert Report - this book should have been a rip-roarin'-romp through male inadequacy and insecurity. It started out strong, but somewhere along the line it became the male version of chick lit: dick lit. And boring to boot.

At first, it was good for a few laughs. But then I laughed less. And got bored. And maybe started to skim a bit. And...more
Jamie
This is a pretty weak collection. I ended up skimming over several of these essays.

I expected better from Dan Savage (his books about his family are very good). David Wain's entry composed entirely of cellphone conversations was good. I also liked Patton Oswalt's essay where he explains how a past relationship with a crazy stripper puts his minor quibbles with his wife into perspective. And Ben Karlin's mom's forward was better than Karlin's essay.
Books Ring Mah Bell
done. chucklelicious. I was not sure who half these people were, very funny men. easy and quick. just like your mom.
Elevate Difference
I have a love/hate relationship with liberal publications, like the New York Times, that discuss progressive issues and at the same time print articles that seem to use stone age mentality to “prove” the differences between women and men. I am forever intrigued by science’s never-ending love affair with sexual dimorphism, and articles with the headlines “What Do Women Want?” and “Varying Sweat Scents Noted By Women” seem to fill the pages of publications every day.

I have a similar love/hate rel...more
Anastacia
Dec 31, 2008 Anastacia rated it 4 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Those who enjoy short stories, essays, humor.
Shelves: humor
This was one of the funniest books I have ever read, and it's one I will reach for many times to read again. A collection of humorous short stories by some of the funniest, wittiest men of our time, this is a book that never fails to cause me to laugh out loud until the end.

The book is a collection of essays written by hilarious men such as Nick Hornby, Stephen Colbert, Bob Odenkirk (who discusses why nine years is the perfect amount of time to be in a bad relationship ("by year nine you try eve...more
l
Bad. Disappointing. And further evidence that Stephen Colbert is not funny in print. A piece by Patton Oswalt was quite amusing, in which he realizes how awesome his wife is particularly in comparing her to his ex-girlfriend (a terrible, violent, uneducated stripper.) Actually, now that I think about it, Damian of Kulash, Jr. (of OKGO) had a pretty sweet (as in aww) piece, and Adam Schlesinger (of Fountains of Wayne. I know.) did an interesting and humorous breakdown of a cheesy love song. Oh, a...more
oriana
Meh and meh and meh. This is pretty much what you'd expect -- a bunch of moderately clever dudes being self-deprecatingly funny -- except less funny than you'd hope. Despite a whole lot of filler, there are some some great moments, like when Andy Richter calls the people who run television networks a bunch of "gutless cunts" or when Dan Savage describes his first time putting his finger in a vagina as it feeling like "a large, lukewarm piece of lasagna with hair". David Rees is funny. Will Forte...more
Patrick
Really funny collection of essays, including, but not limited to: Bob Odenkirk's transcription of part of his seminar: "9 Years is Exactly the Right Amount of Time to be in a Bad Relationship," Stephen Colbert's would-be heart-warming story that is all but completely blacked out by his wife's marker to keep things private, Will Forte's reminiscence of a girlfriend who kept riding off on another guy's motorcycle but kept insisting they were "just friends," Patton Oswalt comparing his wife at her...more
Ross Vincent
I don’t pretend to know my way with the fair sex- knowing that I am idiot and that they are in charge has made life SO much easier, at times. (Plus, it helps to have “Yes Dear” as a reflex response and well as being able to say “I’m sorry” and “You are right/ I was Wrong/ I should have listen to you”). Of course, given my history, there is a reason I have Ross Rule #63 (If a Woman is in love with me, there is a 75 – 90% chance that there is something unstable about them; finding that right minor...more
Marissa Morrison
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Trevor
I was hoping for more laugh-out-loud stories, and while there were many smiles, I ended up feeling a little down -- these are stories wrought with insecurities, damages, and regrets written within plenty of self-deprecation -- It had me, and will have others (guys and girls), reflecting on past romances that left their psychological welts and fond memories behind.
Katie
A collection of essays from male comedians and writers about dating, relationships and their issues with women. Some of the contributions were entertaining and others not so much. I laughed out loud a couple times, but not quite as often as I hoped. Overall a quick, light read with a little something fun for anyone who has ever dated anyone, ever.
R.
Highly recommend Paul Simms' "I'm Easy" which can be read at The New Yorker under the title "Four Short Crushes":

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/2007/0...

bup
It's an easy jab, but really the best thing about this book is the title. Twenty-some chapters, written by mostly comedians, and I expected more. Who understands hurt, and being dumped, better than a comedian? But most of these were trying to be clever, and ended up being neither funny nor touching. I didn't laugh out loud once, and I never even got sad, much less worried about crying.

OK, I'll tell you a bit worth reading - a few chapters that stood out- Ben Karlin's own chapter, which is perhap...more
Chelsea
Great audio book, with essays read by the authors (very funny men, with some witty observations on dating -- usually unsuccessfully).
clare
At first I was like, "oh, how cute. Men are sensitive and insecure etc." Eventually I found myself thinking, "Where are your huevos?"
Felicity
Eh.
I thought there was going to be something interesting or at least funny in this book. I really found neither.
Rob
I seldom read non-fiction essays, humorous or otherwise, 'cause they remind me too much of college - not exactly the happiest days of my life. Before I started reading the book, I looked at the other reviews here and as usual, some liked it - intensely, and not so intensely, and some did not like it - intensely and not so intensely. But one thing we can all agree on - the title is definitely eye-catching and very suggestive. I borrowed the book from the library and when the librarian saw the tit...more
Nyssa
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Josephus FromPlacitas
A mixed bag. I picked it up mostly to see what Dan Savage had to say, having enjoyed The Kid so much. His contribution was so-so, as were many of the more famous writers' contributions (Stephen Colbert's was particularly unengaging for me). Surprisingly, a lot of the best pieces seemed to the ones by musicians, while the comedy writers tended (although not unanimously by any means) to have the weakest additions to the book. Particularly puzzling was the inclusion of alleged war criminal Bob Kerr...more
Doug Stotland
I didn't expect much from this as it looked like a bunch of half-assed essays from a bunch of people who got drunk together and decided they should write a book about getting dumped by women. I only read it because I happened to have it with me when I was stuck without something to read.

I ended up loving most of the book. I solid majority of the essays are hilarious, many were touching, several were thought provoking and a couple were nearly profound. As with any collection of essays there are s...more
Paul (formerly known as Current)
This book is much improved by listening to the audio-book version as the many voices--in most cases, the reader is the author of the story--gives better nuance to the words and provides some further distinguishing of the stories. However, like many reviewers, I found that overall the book fell flat. Certainly there is humor here and in some cases, some actual underlying depth and thought beyond simply being humorous. The main failing in this book is that when strung together, the works all dampe...more
Graceann
Books of essays can provide you with a hit or miss experience, and thisis true of Things I've Learned from Women Who've Dumped Me. Some of the essays, such as Patton Oswalt's deep appreciation for his thoroughly lovely wife thanks to having dated someone who was awful, was perhaps the best of the bunch. Larry Wilmore's essay - "Women are Never Too Young to Mess with Your Head" was another standout, as was Stephen Colbert's heavily redacted piece on his past.

But as is always true with these sort...more
Lulu
Andy Selsber "Unless you want someone to hate you forever, don't ever tell him yo love them 'as a person'. It's like a consolation prize you don't want that leaves you with an unwieldy tax burden. If you absolutely have to love me as something, love me as a walking dildo.// The grudge is a way to show you care, a way to stay connected. It would have been an insult to let what we ahd be downgraded to a mere polite acquaintanceship or even worse, nothing. The grudge requried embarrassing, accusato...more
Sarah
This "eh" of a book, weirdly, is a really good example of a particular, baffling sort of thing that pops up culturally from time to time: a thing, usually a "text," that the career feminists (on feministing.com, for instance) get really riled up about and assume that all thinking women must ipso facto deplore the execution, content, and existence of, but whose feminist significance I... just... totally... miss. I'm all ready to get rambunctious with them, as usual (Down with the imposition of re...more
« previous 1 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 99 100 next »
There are no discussion topics on this book yet. Be the first to start one »
  • Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, But Some Actual Journalism!
  • Decoding Love: Why It Takes Twelve Frogs to Find a Prince, and Other Revelations from the Science of Attraction
  • And Here's the Kicker: Conversations with 21 Top Humor Writers on their Craft and the Industry
  • Savage Love: Straight Answers from America's Most Popular Sex Columnist
  • Requiem for a Paper Bag: Celebrities and Civilians Tell Stories of the Best Lost, Tossed, and Found Items from Around the World
  • Love Is a Four-Letter Word: True Stories of Breakups, Bad Relationships, and Broken Hearts
  • The Day I Turned Uncool: Confessions of a Reluctant Grown-up
  • You're a Horrible Person, But I Like You: The Believer Book of Advice
  • Loser Goes First: My Thirty-Something Years of Dumb Luck and Minor Humiliation
  • Why I'm Like This: True Stories
  • The Big Rewind: A Memoir Brought to You by Pop Culture
  • Housekeeping vs. the Dirt
  • My Custom Van: And 50 Other Mind-Blowing Essays that Will Blow Your Mind All Over Your Face
  • Free-Range Chickens
  • Depth Takes a Holiday
  • Microthrills: True Stories from a Life of Small Highs
  • I Want You to Shut the F#ck Up: How the Audacity of Dopes Is Ruining America
  • Mr. Funny Pants
Foreword: I Think My Son Is A Catch: Selection from Things I've Learned From  Women Who've Dumped Me Introduction by Nick Hornby: Selection from Things I've Learned From  Women Who've Dumped Me Closing Announcements: Selection from Things I've Learned From  Women Who've Dumped Me You Too Will Get Crushed (An Essay from Things I've Learned From  Women Who've Dumped Me) Don't Leave Too Much Room for the Holy Spirit (An Essay from Things I've Learned From  Women Who've Dumped Me)

Share This Book

“4. The whole Icarus-flying-too-near-the-sun-and-plummeting-out-of-the-sky thing? That's real. Same with the Sirens who lure you to death with their irresistible song, and the odalisque so beautiful anyone who looks at her dies. And remember: as badass as Grendel was, Beowulf hadn't seen anything until he went up against Grendel's mother. I know, I know - I thought they were just myths too. But the fact is, sometimes, if you don't want to meet a tragic end, your only option is to avert your gaze, tie yourself to the mast with cotton in your ears, or ascend a little less close to the Vault of Heaven.” 4 likes
“Effectively we become the DVD of Elf that you ignore at nine o'clock on a Friday night, on the presumption there will be something better (at least, something more fulfilling, more complex, and that you haven't seen twice before) on the shelves somewhere. And guess what you end up going home with? Well, that's what we are to these beautiful, fantastic women: Elves.” 2 likes
More quotes…