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Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child's Attitude, Behavior & Character in 5 Days
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Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child's Attitude, Behavior & Character in 5 Days

3.78 of 5 stars 3.78  ·  rating details  ·  1,776 ratings  ·  363 reviews
Shows parents how to reverse negative behavior in children - fast. Author Biography: Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known psychologist, humorist, and bestselling author of The Birth Order Book and Making Children Mind without Losing Yours. He is former consulting psychologist for Good Morning America and a frequent guest on The View, The Early Show, and Focus on the ...more
Paperback, 300 pages
Published March 1st 2008 by Fleming H. Revell Company
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Lisa Topp
Sep 11, 2008 Lisa Topp rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: all moms/dads
Recommended to Lisa by: Focus on the Family
Shelves: non-fiction
By the end of the summer I was losing my mind with my older daughters, ages 9 and 7. This book suggestion popped up in a weekly e-mail, and I really needed new kids by Friday - if not sooner! A few chapters in, (I read more than one a day - I need to get the program going!)I really like the common sense approach, and the fact that you are shaping attitute, behavior and character - they are all intertwined. I started changing my approach already today, and we made it all the way to bedtime with n ...more
Thanks to my MiL for getting this book for me. She was right...some of the ideas this guy uses are excellent. He is practical and has a down-to-earth approach to problems we all face as parents. That being said, I did NOT like all of his personal examples. They read a lot like this, "My children are so angelic. We are such awesome parents. We have never made a mistake and our children are perfect. Just listen to what my daughter/son did..." It was HIGHLY annoying! Common sense says that parents ...more
Dr. Leman makes some good points about setting the appropriate tone for a parent-child relationship, about boundaries and respect. In fact, I agree with most of his broader statements about kids and their needs. His "talk and walk away" approach is probably only effective with some kids, though. I think my personality is far to direct to get involved in child psychology. I've probably formed my parenting habits from my Mom, who was a pretty no-nonsense person. (She spoke as though our not doing ...more
Confession--this was a book my husband INSISTED that I read, not one that I picked out by choice.

I have to say that overall, I felt that Leman only made two valid points throughout the entire book, and that the rest was just filler (or letters from "grateful" readers, plugging this book). The first point that I felt merited some thought was to not encourage/engage in arguing with your child. Later, when they want some favor or treat, you say "no"--if they ask why, you explain--once--that you di
Christie Hagerman
Jun 03, 2008 Christie Hagerman rated it 3 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: any parents
Shelves: family
This has some good pointers overall, but most of it didn't apply to our particular family, since we're homeschoolers who don't have the typical American family/schedule. I liked the suggestions for practical consequences to unwanted behaviors but was disappointed at how many don't apply to us.
Adriane Devries
Dr. Kevin Leman’s title, Have a New Kid By Friday, fools parents into thinking that this book will change their kid’s rotten behavior, when in reality it is the parent who must change first. He knew no one would buy a book called “I’m a Lousy Parent, I Need A Fast-Track Remedial Course.” This hilarious book is a wonderful source of practical, easy-to-remember gems like, “Say it once, turn your back, and walk away;” and “B doesn’t happen until A is done.” Leman’s primary premise is that kids are ...more
Laura G
Jun 27, 2008 Laura G rated it 4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: parents, teachers
In surfing bestsellers this came up. The title seemed so funny that I had to get more info.

After reading the book and testing out some of the ideas in a modified way in my classroom, I have to say that this stuff really does seem to work as far as getting difficult kids to see that it is time for them to change. Not only did it give me some new techniques for working with kids, but the advice that really helped me was that of not feeling guilty about offering true guidance to kids, which sometim
Excellent resource that every parent should read! Even if you do not have a "trouble" child, this book gives excellent ideas of how to build good attitudes, behavior, and character in your children. It also helps you discover what kind of parent you are and what changes you can make in yourself to be a better parent!

It is a helpful resource for anyone working with children as well. The techniques and lessons can be applied to the children you work with.

Tracy was ok. The author's attitude was a bit off-putting. And while I love the idea of natural consequences, I think it is somewhat difficult to implement because not every situation really has a tidy resolution like this author implies. Still, it was a good common sense guide and a reminder to not play into my children's dramas.
Great book with strategies that work to restore order, calm, and RESPECT to a family. Some of the ideas in certain situations strike me as a little harsh, but I also understand that the purpose is to get the child's attention and quickly change negative attitude, character, and behavior. I really like the strategy "B doesn't happen until A is complete." I also like the reminder to not warn/remind children continually: they are smart people! If I don't nag them, there's a greater chance they'll l ...more
May 23, 2008 Beverly rated it 4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: everyone
I truly enjoyed this book. It was plainly written with some good ideas that are easy to implement. A no nonsense approach. Wish it had been around when my kids were young. A great shower gift for the new mom!
Tiffany Allen
This is a good book to help you see what you need help on as a parent...oh I have so much to learn!
Years ago I spied a friend reading a book titled, "How to Make Kids Mind Without Losing Your's." I was intrigued ;D, but I never got around to borrowing it.

A few weeks ago I saw this book, by the same author, lying in our Library Sale stack. What a gem! Mr. Leman is clear and to the point. A few things I especially appreciated is the way he placed focus on the need your children have for time with you (building relationship.) They might not be conscious of this, either because they are 2, 12, or
Very good, but also VERY difficult to put into practice. Goes against a lot of the general ideas of how a lot of us parent today. I never thought of praising my kids as doing them a disservice, but after reading his thoughts, I agree. Encouragement is good, but that is different than praising, which is what most of us do.

The first chapters are about the general principles of his parenting theory, which I would sum up as parents need to stay in control, not get angry, say it once and walk away,
Came close to giving it 1 star because parts of it were SO bad I almost didn't finish it. But I must reluctantly admit that his main message is powerful enough to be of help to many people:
-say it once, then walk away
-B doesn't happen until A happens
-don't get angry (but apologize if you do)

However, his main points are buried in a book dominated by so many flaws that I found it painful to read. The most important of these flaws are covered by other reviews, but to list a few that bugged me:
Becky Giovagnoni
I didn't care for this book. He's a little too conservative for me, although that's not my main issue. My main problem with his parenting advice is that much of what he recommends to correct or change a child's behavior shame-based. He says if you allow your child to be in a situation where he is ashamed or embarrassed in front of his peers, he will quickly change his behavior.

The LAST thing I want to convey to my children is a sense of shame. The main purpose of how I parent is to teach them t
On my quest to improve my parenting, I have read many, many, many, many books. A lot were really good, some were just ok.

I just read Have a New Kid by Friday by, Dr. Kevin Leman. It was pretty good. I would give it 4 or 5 stars. Easy to read, simple steps to implement, reminders of what really I already know, but it is often so hard to DO what we know we should.

I guess I don't know for sure if it works yet, because as we all know, it means I need to change, in order for it to work.

Jenn is doi
Adrian Charles
This book is brilliant in its simplicity and rooted in sound principles. It's a good, quick read for anyone struggling with a strong-willed child, and has the potential to be very helpful. However:
- It's strongly rooted in American Christian Conservative cultural values, and may be less palatable to those of other backgrounds;
- It makes false assurances of 100% effectiveness that make it sound unnecessarily like snake-oil.

"Just walk away— your child *will* back down" is advice that succeeds most
Despite the fact that I was irked by the audacious claim of a 100% guarantee this parenting method will work in 5 days, I liked this book. The first 1/3 introduced a new strategy for dealing with behavior issues for Monday through Friday. The next 2/3 of the book applied the strategies to specific problems from A-Z (allowances to youth groups). It seems like a version of Love and Logic. It sounds sensible to me and gave me some good tips for dealing with my preschoolers. A lot of this will be mo ...more
Think harsh...but very interesting approach. Straightforward, no nonsense. Not too harsh if implemented as soon as child starts to think for himself but pretty harsh if implemented later in life. But it is a really funny read and I actually implemented a few things and got immediate results. I'm waiting for Don to read because he says what I've told him so far goes against my total constitution.
I was falling into the trap of letting my teen rule the roost a bit. Things like him saying that he would do such and such when he got his own way and I sometimes let him. So this book was a good reminder that there are consequences to actions, and that yelling matches with each other just do not work. It's still a work in progress, for example when his allowance is dramatically cut next week because he hasn't done most things he's expected to do I'm sure there will be arguments but I will be ca ...more
I like his technique, but sometimes harder to pull off than suggested. Example: I am at home before taking the kids somewhere. The kids start being disobedient, very disobedient. I am feeling claustrophobic in my little house with momentarily disobedient kids. Am I likely to pull the we-are-not-going-anywhere-afterall card? Not likely!! But done right, his techniques are stellar!!
I'm still waiting for my new kid to arrive in the mail. My son saw the book and actually asked if we were going to get a new kid. I told him that yes, we were going to get a new replace the old ones....he thought that was so funny.

Good ideas, helpful info. In all actuality, after reading this book, I realized that my kids are actually GREAT kids afterall! :)
We were so needing a big change around here and my mother-in-law sent this one to us. It is a lot of commonsense information but sometimes we just need to be hit over the head with it for it to sink in. I read this in just a couple of days and started implementing the ideas. Surprisingly we are already seeing a change in our headstrong, difficult child.
Rebekah Sheppard
Main points:

Attitude creates Behavior and that determines Character. Character is the foundation for attitude and behavior.

Day #1 - 1) Observe what's going on in your house. What areas in your relationship with our child really bother you?
2) Think about how you'd like things to change.
3) Decide to take the bull by the horns.
4) Expect great things to happen.

How to break the cycle of kids not doing what you ask or treating you disrespectfully, do the following when they want something they expe
Kevin Leman is a psychologist who has 5 kids and has written 30 books. Here's his scenario: Kid behaves badly, Mum says no to cookies and milk:
'"Honey, I told you we're not having cookies and milk today." Matthew was stunned. He opened his mouth to argue, then walked away sadly.'
Here's what would happen in real life: Matthew was stunned. He screamed for 2 hours and threw a chair at the wall.
Or: Matthew was stunned. He argued all afternoon, all night, and continued arguing until his parents were
Paula Blanton
I really like Dr. Leman and he has some excellent ideas on raising kids. Only problem that I had was that my child did not always respond to the situation like Dr. Leman thought the child would!! Hence, I did not have a new kid by Friday!! I kind-of liked the kid I have anyway!! Dr. Leman is very entertaining!!
I read this book in what I thought might be the vain hope that it could help fix the issues we were having with our kids. I could not have been more surprised to find that the methods Kevin Leman discusses absolutely work! I wouldn't say we had new kids in five days exactly, but in the couple of weeks since I picked this book up and started using it, the dynamics in our family have changed drastically for the better. The kids are...just nicer and more respectful. They act quicker when we ask the ...more
Okay, I hate the title. I am all for accepting kids for who they are. But I have to say this parenting book was a good fit for me. I learned/was reminded of some very important things, especially how not to nag. AND it has really helped.
I dont have much of a problem kid but just went through the book to get a different perspective on raising kids. I think this book is culturally more suited for the western kids and their value system. I do take home some suggestions by Dr Leman on dealing with various situations and problem areas. His views are forthright and he I like his emphasis on a child learninig to take his own responsibility which rarely happend in a Indian upbringing.
Self analysis of impact of your own action is requir
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Do I need the workbook? 1 7 Oct 23, 2012 03:12AM  
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Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally recognized psychologist, author, and media personality. He was the first to popularize Adlerian psychological concepts in the United States, which are based on birth-order and family dynamics. Dr. Leman holds Bachelor's, Master's, and Doctorate degrees in clinical psychology from the University of Arizona.

Dr. Leman is the founder and president of "Couples of P
More about Kevin Leman...
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