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Blind Date mit einem Vampir (Dark Ones #1)

3.70  ·  Rating Details  ·  10,377 Ratings  ·  559 Reviews
Als Joy sich von ihrer Freundin Miranda die Zukunft voraussagen lässt, erfährt sie zu ihrer Freude, dass sie bald den Mann fürs Leben kennen lernen wird. Doch was soll sie davon halten, dass ihr Traumprinz angeblich ein Vampir ist? Kurz darauf fährt Joy zu einem Gothic Festival nach Tschechien und wird dort Zeugin rätselhafter Vorgänge.
Paperback, 480 pages
Published February 15th 2008 by Egmont LYX Verlag (first published October 28th 2003)
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Sh3lly ✨ Guardian of Mermaids with Broken Tails ✨

Wow, this is boring. I've been trying to read this since January and I am officially giving up. I like Katie MacAlister. She's a good writer. I liked You Slay Me. But this one just didn't work for me.

Too much sitting around making cutesy jokes about the skinny BFF's fast metabolism and the MC not getting laid. Not enough VAMP action. I mean, come on, I thought I was getting a vampire book. They don't even KNOW if any of the male characters ARE vampires for sure and that was after 146 pages. DNF.
Oct 19, 2011 chucklesthescot rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: fiction, uf-pnr, abandoned
I didn't get far with this book at all.The story sounded good-a couple of American friends who love vampires decide to go to the setting of their favourite books to see if the vampires actually exist. I thought this sounded fun but the two idiot vacant headed bitches and their stupid comments all the time really bugged me. They were immature and annoying with all their playground taunts. I was waiting for 'You smell!' 'No YOU smell WORSE poopy pants!' or something similar! And then the caveman b ...more
The title is false advertising! If you want an actual satisfying VAMPIRE story, this ain't the book to quench that thirst. You will be waiting and waiting and waiting for actual vampire action...and then the book ends. I tried really hard to get into this plot, but by the 50% mark it took a complete nose dive for me and never recovered.

Between the insufferable main character and her b-f-f, their utter stupidity, the unfunny dialog, the lame plot lines, the ridiculous NON-VAMPIRIC sex scenes...I
Title of the German edition:
Blind Date mit einem Vampir

As much as I love Katie MacAlisters "Aisling Grey – Guardian"-Series I cant say the same about this book. I didnt like the heroine Joy and her best friend Roxy very much. I kow this book and the constant bickering between the two friends is supposed to be funny but thats just not my sense of humor. I wished sometimes Joy would just shut up and go on with her investigation because the plot per se wasnt uninteresting.
Okay, there were some funn
Apr 04, 2010 Morgan rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Katie MacAlister’s A Girl’s Guide to Vampires is to put it mildly a disappointment. The transparent plot, one-dimensional characters and simple story form a perfect trinity of hackneyed and trite elements to take this novel crashing down. The writing style was okay until the reader gets to sentences like “The cheerleading team in my nether parts kicked into overdrive,” or “ ‘You’re going to be the death of me,’ ‘I’m not going to kill you baby. Just take you to heaven and back.’ Oh Lord did he!” ...more
Heather  book whore & shifter slut extrordinaire
This book was totally a 5***** star read for me! FUNNY as hell and I think I probably laughed in my head every second page and out loud at least once a chapter. The heroine and ber crazy sidekick - best friends who can tell each other anything and call each other on anything - have very interesting senses of humor and both use them defence when they are nervous or uncomfortable. Although sometimes Joy was just plain lippy!

Raphael is your true alpha male - domineering and possessive and protectiv
Aug 15, 2008 Ruby rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Honestly, I wasn't really stirred one way or another when I was reading the book - it was a way to pass the time at work. The obvious spoof on Christine Feehan's Carpathian novels was funny (because you know how formulaic those are), but the two main female characters irritated the absolute ever-loving shit out of me. I could tell Katie MacAlister was going for the type of wisecracking camraderie and pull-no-punches tell it like it is antics that other writers have done much better, but Katie di ...more
The is the first book of Katie MacAlister's Dark Ones series. It's a wacky contemporary paranormal romance that spoofs Christine Feehan's Carpathians series, but in a friendly sort of way. I've also been reading MacAlister's Aisling Gray Gardian series, and all MacAlister's heroines seem to be impervious to embarrassment, even as they charge ahead with foolish actions. They are brazen women and yet strangely endearing, quirky characters. I've also noticed that the "mysteries" in her books withho ...more
A Girl's Guide to Vampires was a nice and pleasant surprise. While I do get tired of Katie MacAlister's same heroine in every book I read, I could tolerate Joy more that most others. But lord can they be moronic, and not in a good way. I do wish she could expand her female leads to be different in both of their physical and mental aspects, and not be the same old monotonous ones over and over again. Always my gripe.

Now on to the rest of the book...
The storyline was interesting, there was some hi
May 19, 2010 Sarah rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I absolutely loved this book - it had me laughing out loud from practically the first page. I'm just glad I wasn't reading it in public or I'd have received no end of strange looks. I just can't wait to read the next book in the series.

Joy & her friend Roxy are both hopeless when it comes to love so they ask for assistance from a wiccan friend to find their true loves. Miranda's prediction for Roxy is quite straightforward - she'll find her true love within a month. However, when it comes to
Mel (booksandsundry)
Twaddle. Absolute twaddle.
Jan 02, 2008 Amanda rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
a really good book...kinda of like twilight love triangle exept she falls in love with jacob instead of edward (that is not their real names in the story)and he is not wa werewolf...just a regular human! Oh and this book has some very detailed "dirty" parts that i had no clue were in there sophisticated!
Bark's Book Nonsense
Hmmm, maybe it's my mood but I'm finding the heroine in this book snarky and immature as opposed to "witty" and "fun" as I've seen her described elsewhere. Maybe I'm just a grouch but she's managed to lampoon Wiccan's and Goth's and romance reader's in a way that is more insulting than hysterical. Or maybe I've gone and lost my sense of humor again.

Later: I'm throwing in the towel at 100 pages. I'm just not finding this funny, the heroine is idiotic and so is her best friend who runs off to East
Finally I have read the first one in the Dark Ones series. I hate reading books out of order and for some reason I started with the second book with this series. With how the first book ends I have the strong urge to pick up the second book again and find out what went on again.

In this book we have the adventures of Joy and Roxy in the Czech Republic. They are spending two weeks there looking for A Dark One (Vampire) and checking the local sites. They luck out (don't characters in books always
Aug 22, 2011 Paige rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2011-books
It took me a while to get into this book. It was really long and felt like I would never finish it.

The story follow Joy Randall and her friend Roxy as they take a trip to Czech Republic. After their friend's vision that they will meet and Joy will be a Beloved to a vampire, they begin suspecting multiple men of being a vampire at the local fair.

I didn't care for the introduction of so many characters, but I did come to really like Raphael St. John and Christian J. Dante.

As a relationship bloom
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Aug 27, 2010 Monica rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: reviewed
This book is about a women and her friend traveling to a foreign country in search of the soul mates their witch friend predicted they would find. MacAlister's writing is smooth, witty, and freaking hilarious. I laughed out loud on so much of the dialogue and especially some of the monologue of the main character. The plot was strong, the romance was extra steamy, and the characters were wonderful. MacAlister has a strong command over vocabulary either, I loved the fact that she has written a ro ...more
Under the Covers Book Blog

I have read Ms. MacAlister before and frankly I'm not sure whey I didn't pick up this series before now because I've loved her dragon books so much. There's something about the over the top humor and totally unrealistic storylines (yeah, I'm saying unrealistic in a vampire book, don't judge some are believable!!)
A GIRL'S GUIDE TO VAMPIRES introduces us to a world of vampires that is, of course, sort of secret. Except for the fact that one author has written a series of paranormal romances that

Nov 28, 2015 Amelie rated it it was ok
... ist der typische Erotik Vampir Roman mit Humor. Starke Heldin, die nur durch das unglaublich gutaussehende Objekt ihrer Begierde schwach wird. Jede Menge ab und an doch recht flache Witze und eine Menge Erotik. In diesem Fall vor allem Gedanken an diese. Auch wenn ich Joy doch recht sympathisch fand, war das Buch leider ganz genau wie man das erwarten würde und konnte mich jetzt nicht überzeugen. Schade eigentlich...

Das ist wohl auch einfach nicht mein Genre *seufz*
I'm about 20% in and I just can't anymore. I'm trying so hard to remember that this is supposed to be a comedy but I've succumbed to the same repetitive eye-roll strain as the rest of the book club. This book is as tired & un-funny as a Leslie Nielsen parody movie. Urgh. Joy and (even more so) Roxy seem to be a 12 year old's idea of what grown ups must be like. Even if I could write off the infantile characterisations to simply being typical of chick-lit and PNRs, I can't cope with the chees ...more
Mar 14, 2016 Audrey rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I really wanted to like this book. The story line has so much potential, as do the supporting characters. The protagonist, Joy, however, does not. I could not relate to or sympathize with her in the least. To put it bluntly, she's an idiot and I wanted to slap her...often. Her melodrama had me rolling my eyes throughout the book. I found it difficult to finish the book and as a result I would be hard pressed to read anything else by this author.
Veronica Belmont
Thoughts on Vaginal Fantasy tonight.
18 March 2015: $0.99 on Kindle

10/27/2014: $1.99 on Kindle
Feb 23, 2014 Ariadne rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: kindle, vg-fantasy, 2014
I know this book was supposed to be a fun and hilarious romance story, but it didn't work for me. The main character and her friend made me want to throw my Kindle to the nearest wall several times! (but of course I didn't, I love my Kindle). There were so many impossible situations and silly decisions that I really thought every character in the book had a serious problem being sane.
I didn't buy the vampire story because for me it was loosely explained and seemed utterly absurd. And maybe I lo
Francesca the Fierce (Under the Covers Book Blog)
3.5 Stars

I have read Ms. MacAlister before and frankly I’m not sure whey I didn’t pick up this series before now because I’ve loved her dragon books so much. There’s something about the over the top humor and totally unrealistic storylines (yeah, I’m saying unrealistic in a vampire book, don’t judge some are believable!!)

A GIRL’S GUIDE TO VAMPIRES introduces us to a world of vampires that is, of course, sort of secret. Except for the fact that one author has written a series of paranormal roman
Apr 06, 2015 Irene rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I can't believe I've actually read this till the end. This is one stupidly hilarious and hilariously stupid book! With one asinine heroine! If there really are people like that in America then I can believe all the things I heard about Americans and their lack of not only common sense but any sense at all. And all dumb blond jokes are starting to make sense as well.

The only bright thing here is Raphael - he is a saint! And not just because he's St.John (pun intended). His patience with these lun
Jan 10, 2011 Archer rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Anyone
Blurb from

Joy Randall's Top 5 Tips for Vampire Hunters: 1. Location, location, location. Remember, if you wouldn't be there, neither would a bloodsucker. 2. Trust your eyes. You know the handsome, annoyingly arrogant, self-assured man in the shadows with long hair and a cleft in his chin? He's your vampire. 3. No matter how tempting it might be, do not "accidentally" acquire a paper cut and suggest YOUR VAMPIRE kiss your finger to make it better. 4. From here on out, play
heather ♥
Sep 27, 2011 heather ♥ rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: pnr-uf
This book annoyed the living shit out of me.

It's about two friends who love a particular book series about vampires, and travel to the place where the author lives in order to try to find vampires. They then proceed to use the books as an end all and be all of the "Dark Ones" as they call them. I cringed through half of the dialogue in the book, Joy and Roxy kept up with this whole "everyone's a vampire" thing and had no problems talking about it as though it was perfectly reasonable.

If that we
Sarah Dizon
Wow, I don't even know where to begin my review of A Girl's Guide to Dating Vampires. I thought I was completely over the whole vampire train because I have been bored with most of the vampire books I've read, but I guess I was just missing something. Katie MacAlister has totally changed that for me. I've already got the second book in the series on hold at the library. I think the best part of it was that it didn't completely revolve around vampires, and the vampires didn't make a large appeara ...more
Sarah Marie
I actually wanted to read the sequel "sex and the single vampire" first because I'd heard it was really good, but since they were both in the library I figured I'd read the first one, "a girls guide to vampires" first, just for something to do.

Like most reviewers I found most of the characters in this book extremely annoying. Joy seemed to be trying to be a strong independent woman asserting herself, but she came across whiny, paranoid, nosy and incredibly selfish. But most of all, apart from
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Piles of books: Newbee alert 1 2 Aug 12, 2014 10:43PM  
Vaginal Fantasy B...: * Official Discussion Thread for A Girl's Guide to Vampires *SPOILERS* 103 626 Feb 25, 2014 04:20PM  
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For as long as she can remember, Katie MacAlister has loved reading. Growing up in a family where a weekly visit to the library was a given, Katie spent much of her time with her nose buried in a book. Despite her love for novels, she didn't think of writing them until she was contracted to write a non-fiction book about software. Since her editor refused to allow her to include either witty dialo ...more
More about Katie MacAlister...

Other Books in the Series

Dark Ones (1 - 10 of 12 books)
  • Sex and the Single Vampire (Dark Ones #2)
  • Sex, Lies and Vampires (Dark Ones #3)
  • Even Vampires Get the Blues (Dark Ones #4)
  • The Last of the Red-Hot Vampires (Dark Ones #5)
  • Zen and the Art of Vampires (Dark Ones #6)
  • Crouching Vampire, Hidden Fang (Dark Ones #7)
  • Got Fangs? (Ben and Fran, #1)
  • Circus of the Darned (Ben and Fran, #2)
  • In the Company of Vampires (Dark Ones #8)
  • Much Ado About Vampires (Dark Ones, #9)

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“A compliment would be the last thing out of my mouth to a man who was so pigheaded that he could be served at a luau.” 32 likes
“Stay here til I come to fetch you."
I no longer recognize you in the Republic of Joy," I loftily informed him. "Our diplomatic ties are severed."
Unsever them," he growled, "or the Country of Raphael will be forced to declare your republic a protectorate."
Dictator," I muttered.
For life," he agreed.”
More quotes…