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238th out of 475 books
—
296 voters
How to Survive a Horror Movie
Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid.
From ghosts, vampires, and zombies to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films. Readers will discover:
• How to Perform an Exorcism
• What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer
• How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheri...more
From ghosts, vampires, and zombies to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films. Readers will discover:
• How to Perform an Exorcism
• What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer
• How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheri...more
Paperback, 176 pages
Published
May 1st 2007
by Quirk Books
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I saw this book reviewed here...and felt strangely compelled to reserve it at the library. Just after picking it up and reading the opening chapter on how to tell if you actually are trapped in a horror movie....I discovered a box of very old books I hadn't realized I even owned??? Upon finding them I went searching out shelf space for the dusty old volumes (oddly as soon as I went into the dark bed room to shelve the books my cat screamed and leapt from one of the shadowy shelves right at me. S...more
Horror movies and I? We go way back. I've been a voracious consumer since I was eight and my enthusiasm for the genre hasn't diminished with ... ahem ... maturity and wisdom. So yeah, it's been a lifelong love affair, one I don't hide, or feel I need to apologize for. Because even amidst the dreck, there exists some awesome cinematic gems, and amidst the classics there are film moments of hair-raising, heart-stopping, enviable genius.
The naysayers who decry: "how can you watch that garbage" are...more
The naysayers who decry: "how can you watch that garbage" are...more
4 likes · like · see review
i had to read this when i saw that he has a jane austen/zombie book coming out soon. this was a good way to kill time until the release date. but now i am finally going to have to read pride and prejudice!! dammit!
16 likes · like · see review
Nov 09, 2008
Gary
added it
Well, now I know that all I have to do to survive is whip my junk out since full-frontal male nudity does not exist in horror films. Cheers!
Perhaps capitalizing on the zombie survival trend, this book attempts to cover ALL manner of horror films and tells the reader how to tell if you're in one and what to do next.
I found it humorous enough, but it felt like the author was rather stretched for material. He seemed to bounce back and forth between two vantage points - one being that there actually is a Horrorverse and you are in it, the other being that you are just on a movie set. The advice for what to do in the actual Horrorverse w...more
I found it humorous enough, but it felt like the author was rather stretched for material. He seemed to bounce back and forth between two vantage points - one being that there actually is a Horrorverse and you are in it, the other being that you are just on a movie set. The advice for what to do in the actual Horrorverse w...more
Jan 05, 2009
Laura
rated it
5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
horror movie fans
Recommended to Laura by:
no one
Shelves:
adult
Hilarious! Takes a lot from classic, easy to recognize horror movies and compiles advice in humorous and bizarre lists. This author has a great sense of humor and the book is pretty short which is the perfect length to end before the jokes get stale. Anyone who enjoys the older horror movies like Nightmare on Elm street, Halloween, Friday the 13th, the Shining, Children of the Corn, Pet Sementary, etc. will have fun with this book.
This book wins the award of MOST impulsive buy! But the laughs I...more
This book wins the award of MOST impulsive buy! But the laughs I...more
This was a delightful piece of meta-fiction. The book provided a distinctly tongue and cheek analysis of the horror movie genera. Although only hitting popular horror movies villains such as slashers, the undead, and aliens he covers them very well though dragging in some areas. Most notably when the book discusses "twist endings". There are a few parts that are like this and feel drug out and the humor falls a little flat when that happens. However the humor throughout the book keeps a good pac...more
This is by far one of my most favorite sardonic horror books of all time! I mean who doesn't love a good guide on the horror genre!? I know I do!
This little book also packs a lot of punch with in the first few chapters. The artwork throughout the book is awesome and stands true to what is being described in each section of each chapter. I love chapter #2 the most, because it's called 'Slasher Survival School - Masks, Gloves, and Motels'. I feel that the second section called 'Surviving Summer Va...more
This little book also packs a lot of punch with in the first few chapters. The artwork throughout the book is awesome and stands true to what is being described in each section of each chapter. I love chapter #2 the most, because it's called 'Slasher Survival School - Masks, Gloves, and Motels'. I feel that the second section called 'Surviving Summer Va...more
This is honestly and truly one of the most hilarious books I have ever read in my life. And to think, I just happened upon it by accident! I was walking through Hastings one night, searching for James Bond books when, suddenly, I saw this one. And I bought it.
Best. Purchase. Ever.
I've always loved horror movies and so I think it's safe to say I've seen my fair share of them. Reading this book is honestly one of the greatest experiences of my life. All of the silly things that happen in horror mo...more
Best. Purchase. Ever.
I've always loved horror movies and so I think it's safe to say I've seen my fair share of them. Reading this book is honestly one of the greatest experiences of my life. All of the silly things that happen in horror mo...more
If you are a horror movie fan (you don't have to be a guru) you will def enjoy this book. It's not a 'horror movies for dummies' but rather a 'OMG I am stuck in a horror movie, how do I survive?!' 12 step guide LOL.
SGS covers all your basic genres from evil dolls to alien invasion to possession, and the penultimate... Satan himself LOL. He also offers tidbits of last chance escape plans in case you are about to get eaten, slashed, or demonized. Smith has a great sense of humor and I didn't feel...more
SGS covers all your basic genres from evil dolls to alien invasion to possession, and the penultimate... Satan himself LOL. He also offers tidbits of last chance escape plans in case you are about to get eaten, slashed, or demonized. Smith has a great sense of humor and I didn't feel...more
From ghosts, vampires and zombies, to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films.
Readers will discover many useful tips, from How to Survive a Haunted House, How to Kill the Living Dead, How to Perform an Exorcism, How to Stay Awake for a Week, What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer, How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheriff, How to Vanquish a Murderous Doll, How to S...more
Readers will discover many useful tips, from How to Survive a Haunted House, How to Kill the Living Dead, How to Perform an Exorcism, How to Stay Awake for a Week, What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer, How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheriff, How to Vanquish a Murderous Doll, How to S...more
Mar 18, 2009
Robert Chartrand
rated it
4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
Fans of horror movies and/or sitirical survival books
Being a huge fan of the comical "survival guides," there was no way that I was going to pass this one up. As the title clearly gives away, the book takes you on a step-by-step journey on how to survive being in a horror movie.
It starts off with how to tell that you are in a horror movie, and then how to figure out what kind of horror movie you are in. From there is gives you advice on how to survive and handle various situations.
The majority of the book goes through all of the stereotypical hor...more
It starts off with how to tell that you are in a horror movie, and then how to figure out what kind of horror movie you are in. From there is gives you advice on how to survive and handle various situations.
The majority of the book goes through all of the stereotypical hor...more
How to Survive a Horror Movie is a goofy little tongue in cheek collection of stuff we wished could happen to add spice to our lives. I would enjoy fighting evil dolls and being chased by serial killers than going to work and school any day. This book is a great look at horror movies in general but is also a good reminder to the fans of the genre that every type of horror movie has its cliches and flaws. The "tips and tricks" offered in this book are just basic logical things to think about whil...more
Seth Grahame-Smith obviously spent a large part of his childhood (and much of his adulthood) watching horror movies. I can totally relate to this, as I have spent most of my life watching horror movies as well. Clearly, those of us who are not in jail or mental institutions have learned to channel (or divert) our love of horror movies into something healthy. With me, it's heavy drug use. For Grahame-Smith, it's writing books. In "How to Survive a Horror Movie", SGS has written the ultimate survi...more
Este libro describe de manera graciosilla qué cosas se deben hacer y qué cosas se deben evitar en el caso de encontrarnos en una película de horror con el objetivo de salir vivos de ésta.
Está organizada según los tipos comunes de películas de horror, y se basa principalmente en los clichés conocidos por todos.
Se entiende que es una lectura muy ligera, sin embargo se limita a señalar las situaciones que se esperan en las películas con muy poca creatividad y esto impide que el libro tenga gracia....more
Está organizada según los tipos comunes de películas de horror, y se basa principalmente en los clichés conocidos por todos.
Se entiende que es una lectura muy ligera, sin embargo se limita a señalar las situaciones que se esperan en las películas con muy poca creatividad y esto impide que el libro tenga gracia....more
If you are a horror fan, you are familiar with a number of the scenarios in this book. Written with a healthy dose of humor, this book is the perfect gift for your horror fan.With advice for people who find themselves int he terrorverse, this book offers advice for surviving summer camp, demonic dolls, haunted houses, and more. It includes helpful tips like ten things to NOT put into a child's room (beds taller than 4 inches, closets...) I found myself alternately nodding my head and laughing ou...more
“How to Survive a Horror Movie” is a satirical book that plans out, in detail how to survive every possible scenario for horror movies. The humor and wit in this book is something that I wish to translate into my own writing. By asking rhetorical questions like, “Does the music crescendo every time you open a door?” as a way of determining if you are in a horror movie, the book points out several stereotypes involved in horror movies that you may have never thought about, but are amusing to real...more
If you are a fan of horror movies, in any sense, this book is for you. I was surprised to find it cynical yet comical, and realistic yet imaginative. The chapters are divided into different horror movie types (slasher, inanimate objects, the undead, etc.), and graphic comic like art is provided throughout to give you visuals of the insanity that ensues. It's a quick read so the pages keep on turning, and more importantly it reminds us that it's ok if not recommended to tackle the subjects that w...more
"How to Survive a Horror Movie" is in the vein (if you will) of "The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead" although a bit less deadpan in its humor. It is uneven, an unavoidable part of the genre but very funny in parts and worth reading.
Some of the advice it gives is obvious--altough probably hard to recall when faced with a gruesome death from a horrible monster: "Never wait to you need a gun to check if it is loaded" or "If a giant shark is chasing your family don'...more
Some of the advice it gives is obvious--altough probably hard to recall when faced with a gruesome death from a horrible monster: "Never wait to you need a gun to check if it is loaded" or "If a giant shark is chasing your family don'...more
Nov 17, 2007
Jesse
rated it
4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
Fans of Horror movies and humor
Shelves:
non-fiction-about-sci-fi-fantasy
This was a very fun take on horror movies. I'm sure most fans of horror movies have thought, "I would kick the horror movie world's ass". Well this author thought it (or at least thought he could survive the horror movie's ass if not kick it) and he wrote it up with colorful illustrations. From how cabins are the most deadly location in the world, to how your junk just might save you from the devil; this book is loaded with fun facts. The humor is good, if a bit raunchy at times (but come on, yo...more
The title says it all, How to Survive a Horror Movie: All the Skills to Dodge the Kills.
This is the type of stuff Seth Grahame-Smith should stick to. Humor! He pretty much pegs every single horror movie cliche, and some I had never picked up on. I found myself laughing out loud to several sections of this book. And hey, I'm pretty sure if I ever get trapped in a horror flick, I'm going to at least make it to the sequel.
Very funny book.
This is the type of stuff Seth Grahame-Smith should stick to. Humor! He pretty much pegs every single horror movie cliche, and some I had never picked up on. I found myself laughing out loud to several sections of this book. And hey, I'm pretty sure if I ever get trapped in a horror flick, I'm going to at least make it to the sequel.
Very funny book.
Seth Grahame-Smith is a gentleman and a scholar. I hear his brain is insured for $10,000. I met him last weekend -- and it was amazing.
Anyway, this book is a must-read for ANY horror fan/B-movie afficionado/gorehound. Cleverly written, with plenty of fun references and cheeky puns, this is a book that clearly caters to its audience and is a laugh-out-loud piece of metafiction.
A+, would read again (and again and again).
Anyway, this book is a must-read for ANY horror fan/B-movie afficionado/gorehound. Cleverly written, with plenty of fun references and cheeky puns, this is a book that clearly caters to its audience and is a laugh-out-loud piece of metafiction.
A+, would read again (and again and again).
For those of us who are unabashed horror film fans, this little gem of a book will seem almost like common sense. Grahame-Smith points out the obvious things like the Don't-Go-Exploring-on-Your-Own clues that we all yell at the completely oblivious characters on screen during a horror movie. Grahame-Smith also does a good job of covering all sub-genres of horror from the werewolf/zombie/vampire to the ghost/supernatural.
Perhaps what makes this little book worth the $15 is really the wry, self-aw...more
Perhaps what makes this little book worth the $15 is really the wry, self-aw...more
Consider how you stumbled upon this review. Is the universe trying to tell you something? Are YOU in a horror movie?
Are you sure it's harmless fun that you wandered into because of your sparkling sense of humor and...more
“Welcome to the Terrorverse!”
Quirk Books and Seth Grahame-Smith have done it again. Another book of theirs has won my heart. In Danse Macabre, Stephen King speaks of the fine line between horror and humor…this book manipulates the line in an undeniably fun way for a fan of the genre.
Are you sure it's harmless fun that you wandered into because of your sparkling sense of humor and...more
Clever but slightly repetitive, there is more gristle than meat on this corpse. Grahame-Smith explores the horror movie tropes we all know and love with a gallon of caustic wit and a heaping handful of monstrous puns. While i found the book fun (especially Nathan Fox's blood-tinged illustrations), I'm just not the horror aficionado this book is written for. The target audience, however, will find it dead-on.
Reading the title, and knowing Grahame-Smith's work, I expected this to be a pretty decent read. I am a huge horror fan and have a high standard on what is said on it.
Reading this was an amazing experience.
From Wes Craven's introduction to what you should do when your director is out to kill you, it was a fascinating read for anyone who has even the slightest like for Horror, let alone a huge love for it.
Reading this was an amazing experience.
From Wes Craven's introduction to what you should do when your director is out to kill you, it was a fascinating read for anyone who has even the slightest like for Horror, let alone a huge love for it.
1 like · like · see review
How To Survive A Horror Movie is a great companion book to a dark and stormy night. This is a fun yet serious guide to the horror movie universe. It even has a foreword by Wes Craven, one of the great creators in this genre. Seth Grahame-Smith took the rules we hear about in Scream a great step forward. This book describes all the different types of horror as well as what isn't horror. Not only are the different types recognized but they are also dissected in a very comical way.
As a horror afici...more
As a horror afici...more
This book had some real laugh out loud moments as well as cheeseball moments. I am an avid watcher of horror movies and I really think the combination of his humor AND trying to "name that horror movie" really captivated me. It's a quick/painless read and I'm grateful that this book happened to catch my eye. I enjoyed it completely!
This book has all the horror movie cliches down pat and, most importantly, what to do so you don't become dead meat before the credits roll.
Presented with a lot of tongue in cheek, this handbook walks the reader through the various horror movie scenarios and gives hints and tips on how to survive each one. I especially enjoyed the section on dealing with possessed dolls and what to do if your corn has children in it.
I'd say Grahame-Smith knows his stuff when it comes to the pitfalls that most h...more
Presented with a lot of tongue in cheek, this handbook walks the reader through the various horror movie scenarios and gives hints and tips on how to survive each one. I especially enjoyed the section on dealing with possessed dolls and what to do if your corn has children in it.
I'd say Grahame-Smith knows his stuff when it comes to the pitfalls that most h...more
Not anticipating anything (having picked this up on a lark), I must say I enjoyed it thoroughly. If a work makes me laugh out loud (which this did on several occasions), I appreciate it. Not literature, of course, but such amusing observations on the horror movie genre have never been lumped together quite like this.
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Seth Grahame-Smith (born Seth Jared Greenberg) is an American author, screenwriter and film producer. He is best known for his novels Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter which both hit the New York Times' best seller list. Seth Grahame-Smith lives in Los Angeles, California with his wife, Erin, and his son, Joshua.
More about Seth Grahame-Smith...
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“put the car in "d" set the compass to "n" and get the "f"out of there”
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