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Forgiving Ourselves: Getting Back Up When We Let Ourselves Down
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Forgiving Ourselves: Getting Back Up When We Let Ourselves Down

4.4  ·  Rating Details ·  113 Ratings  ·  38 Reviews
All sin, many repent, but few really forgive themselves and find peace. Too often we fail to fully claim the "amazing grace" of the Atonement. How can we help our loved ones-- and ourselves-- let go of past mistakes? Wendy Ulrich, an experienced psychologist, maps the journey from selfblame to self- forgiveness. She shows how the pure doctrines of the gospel, coupled with ...more
Paperback, 272 pages
Published February 29th 2008 by Deseret Book
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I had seen this book at several conventions and thought to myself, "I am pretty good at forgiving myself so I don't think I need to get it." I'm not sure what prompted me to finally purchase this book, but I am so glad I did! So glad!!

Wendy Ulrich is one of my all-time favorite authors. I love the way she writes. I love her analogies, her great sense of humor (which she adds at just the right moments), her honesty about her own experiences, her candidness and her willingness to be a tremendous c
Feb 14, 2009 Marilee rated it it was amazing
I thought this was absolutely one of the best books I have ever read. I have learned so much from it. I don't think the title does it justice. I think it is about so much more than forgiving ourselves. It has chapters about depression, anxiety, and over-working. It covers OCD, and abuse and other serious sin situations-- but it was personally helpful to me in little ways in looking at motives and if I am letting God do His part. I thought she really got right down to the nitty-gritty of why ...more
Jun 02, 2012 Talya rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: Any Christian
Recommended to Talya by: My therapist
Shelves: self-help, lds
This book should be required reading to every member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, particularly those in leadership positions. It is perfect mix of scripture, prophetic and secular quotes, and basic psychology. The author covers far more than forgiving ourselves. She reviews the how's and why's of sin and destructive cycles, deferentiating weakness from sin and explains clearly how to tackle these. Her voice is not overly sweet, or overly condemning. She realistically seeks ...more
Aug 23, 2008 jaime rated it it was amazing
ya know? we mormons can be pretty darn hard on ourselves.
May 12, 2016 Jodi rated it it was amazing
Shelves: lds
This book contains so much more than just what its title implies. This is one of the best books about the Atonement that I've ever read. It doesn't just explain how to receive forgiveness for sins and move forward in our lives, but explains the difference between sins and weaknesses and how to overcome both. All of us have weaknesses that aren't sins and don't need repentance, but we still need to be humble and ask for help in overcoming our weaknesses. This book is written by an LDS author who ...more
Heather Rindlisbacher
Jul 03, 2009 Heather Rindlisbacher rated it it was amazing
This is a must read for those struggling with perfectionism & doubts about one's self worth/worthiness. Exceptional, in particular, for those dealing with depression & other forms of dehabilitating mental illness. Not only did I buy the book for myself, I then went out & bought half a dozen copies to give away. It's one of those that I feel quite comfortable passing on to a friend, not too doctrinal and yet not too behaviorist based either. It is written for an LDS audience, but I ...more
Aug 20, 2013 Teddy rated it it was amazing
A practical and equally inspiring "how to" on forgiveness. It has opened my mind to the reasons behind why we make the mistakes we do, and especially how we can get trapped in a situation we desperately want to be free of. To me, this book is about UNDERSTANDING and opening my mind to the possibility of real change. Having seen the face of evil in my own life and coming to terms with the consequence of sin, this book was a refreshing guide, if you will, on how to come out the other side whole ...more
Jan 09, 2012 Eduardo rated it it was amazing
When I finished this book I wrote that I said goodbye to a good friend. There are things in the life of everyone that one say "I can never forgive myself..." and then you just feel the blank. She deals with that topic like the great professional that she is. I love her books and this is a masterpiece. Give it a chance if you ever find yourself in that situation. Maybe you are in that situation and don't even know. It is very interesting. I love intelligent people and this woman is one of the ...more
Mar 31, 2012 Debbie rated it liked it
I liked the premise of "Forgiving Ourselves: Getting Back Up When We Let Ourselves Down", but I'm not sure that the subject warrants an entire book. It often felt like the author was multiplying her words through redundant coverage of the topics. The examples used were interesting and, perhaps, the best part of the book. The exercises were not particularly useful. I liked the book, but I will probably not go out of my way to purchase another book by this author.
Jun 25, 2008 Chris rated it it was amazing
Wendy is my dear friend and her writing is amazing. This book is so helpful to anyone who has ever struggled to let go of the after-effects of sin and error. Her writing is beautiful and very "right-on" and the book is pretty dense, but packed with such energy and peace, it's absolutely worth the time and effort to read it well. Don't think novel...think something you're going to spend time with and work with. It's fabulous!
Jun 16, 2008 Emily rated it liked it
Read this for my Positive Psychology class, taught by the author of this book. The book is pretty good, but I don't think I would've read it if I didn't have to. Applicable to LDS people struggling to forgive themselves for sins & to accept their weaknesses. Includes interesting sections on the unique challenges that come into play with depression, perfectionism, anxiety, trauma/abuse, etc.
Apr 08, 2013 Catherine rated it really liked it
This book provides a lot of insight into what it means to be forgiven and how we should forgive ourselves. I learned a lot from the author (she is a psychologist). There were lots of good ideas about how we can handle hard things in life and to recognize what is actually our fault and in our control and what isn't.
Suzette Kunz
Jul 23, 2016 Suzette Kunz rated it really liked it
My aunt, who is a counselor, recommended this book at a workshop she was giving. So many great insights, I recommend it to all. She deals with serious issues like abuse and addiction, but most of the book focuses on everyday weaknesses that we want to get rid of. She offers very helpful ideas. I learned a lot.
Paula Soper
Apr 28, 2016 Paula Soper rated it it was amazing
Shelves: 2012, 2014, 2015
This is a great book combining self-help and the gospel. A friend said to me that she couldn't tell if it was a good book because she didn't understand all of the Mormon references. That makes sense to me because the book does such a good job of combining both.

Thanks, Wendy Ulrich and Suz, for writing and recommending this book.
Oct 16, 2011 Rochelle rated it really liked it
Shelves: self-help
I didn't ever quite get through this. I read through the first few chapters, nodded at the author's insight, decided I was pretty good at forgiving and self-forgiveness, and lost interest. I think it would be really good for people who need to work through forgiving themselves for past mistakes.
Apr 02, 2013 Kellie rated it it was amazing
I loved this book. Wendy is a LDS psychologist who brings much needed healing through the channel of psychology and the saviors atonement. I discovered many things about myself in this book that I had never noticed before. Gave me a lot of things to think about :)
Feb 01, 2010 Brittany rated it liked it
Really interesting read, helps to get into the nitty gritty of exactly what we're thinking that prevents us from forgiving ourselves, although I admit I never finished because it got too repetitive in the end.
Dec 01, 2008 Esther marked it as to-read
I picked up this book because its written by the wife of my friends' mission president. Also, my friend Melanie married her son. And this author happens to be from Michigan and taught at U of M.
I have met her on a few occasions, (friend's Mother in law) and was very impressed.
Jeannie Lee
Mar 15, 2009 Jeannie Lee is currently reading it
Shelves: religious
So far it has helped me move past some things I have done in the past. It really has helped me forgive myself of embarrassing moments and stupid things I done. It helps me see myself through my Heavenly Father's eyes.
Nov 20, 2009 Kevin rated it it was amazing
One of the best books I've seen in years about how we treat ourselves, getting past our expectations to be perfect and feeling inadequate, and what Christ's atonement can mean for us. I've recommended it to MANY clients already.
Mar 28, 2013 Danni rated it it was amazing
I went to time out for women last weekend and watched sister Ulrich speak. I decide that I wanted to try a few of her books and I was not disappointed. This is a very uplifting inspiring book about being able to let go of our mistakes and moving on with life.
Oct 18, 2008 Kristen is currently reading it
Birthday gift from a friend. So far, some very interesting discussions about weaknesses versus sin and that we should regard and approach them differently.
Wow, have read bits and pieces. It's a big book with tiny print, but the quotes, philosophies and teachings are eye/mind-opening and life changing. Really like what I've read so far.
Jun 24, 2008 Jenny rated it it was amazing
Shelves: spirituality
Such a great book! The author is an LDS counselor that does an amazing job teaching that because of Christ's love we can have confidence even as we struggle through life's trials.
Jen Jenson
Aug 04, 2014 Jen Jenson rated it it was ok
Difficult Read, at least in your head. I finally just gave up. What I read was good. Just difficult with tons of processing.
Mar 09, 2010 Melanie rated it liked it
This is a great interactive book that helps with your inner thought process and how we keep kicking ourselves when we do not need to.
Tina Ottley
Apr 27, 2008 Tina Ottley rated it did not like it
This book is awful! I bought it for a lesson I gave. Not much to use from it. It was written by a psychologist, and it is more about psychology than the scriptures.
Jan 16, 2009 Chris rated it really liked it
Shelves: non-fiction
A powerful book that teaches us how to forgive ourselves and how to receive the amazing power of grace.
Ian G
Ian G rated it it was amazing
Nov 16, 2010
Camille Robison
Camille Robison rated it really liked it
Jan 09, 2012
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Wendy Ulrich, Ph.D., was a psychologist in private practice for over fifteen years in Michigan before joining her husband to serve when he was called as president of the Canada Montreal Mission in 2002. They now live in Alpine, Utah, where she founded Sixteen Stones Center for Growth, LLC, offering seminar retreats on forgiveness, abundant life, loss, spirituality, and personal growth (visit www.s ...more
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