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61st out of 616 books
—
1,006 voters
Real Vampires Have Curves (Glory St. Clair #1)
by
Gerry Bartlett (Goodreads Author)
What - did you think all vamps were pale, thin and brooding? Don't I wish.
Gloriana St. Clair is an eternally "full-figured" vampire-she just happened to be bloating when a sexy Scotsman sank his teeth into her. She and said Scot- Angus Jeremiah Campbell III, aka Jeremy Blade-have been on and off again for centuries, currently off. A couple hundred years has taught them h...more
Gloriana St. Clair is an eternally "full-figured" vampire-she just happened to be bloating when a sexy Scotsman sank his teeth into her. She and said Scot- Angus Jeremiah Campbell III, aka Jeremy Blade-have been on and off again for centuries, currently off. A couple hundred years has taught them h...more
Paperback, 330 pages
Published
March 6th 2007
by Berkley Books
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This was an amazingly uneven book. It was okay, I guess. Some of the characters were cute, and the author made a valiant attempt at a "sassy" voice for her main character, but all in all it was just uneven. And kind of sloppy.
The mind-reading schtick was cute for a couple pages, then it just started to look like sloppy writing. The book's written in first person POV, and throughout the book, other characters would comment on the POV narration because they were reading her mind. After a while, wh...more
The mind-reading schtick was cute for a couple pages, then it just started to look like sloppy writing. The book's written in first person POV, and throughout the book, other characters would comment on the POV narration because they were reading her mind. After a while, wh...more
You know all the novels about the stick thin supermodel type vampires? Well, Glory St. Clair isn’t one of those. She’s got those curves and she knows how to use them. In the first installment in this refreshing series about a curvy vampire, Glory has decided to uproot and take charge of her life - taking that hourglass shape of hers to Austin, Texas. Why Austin, you ask? With being alive for centuries, you tend to accumulate a lot of great stuff over the years so Glory is opening her own little...more
Jun 22, 2008
Jini
rated it
3 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
anyone wanting sappy vampire chick lit
Recommended to Jini by:
amazon's "other customers who bought X also bought Y
I need some fluff to decompress after a long day of work and school. This kind of fits the bill. The first in a series, it's already got quite a lot of backstory that I feel I've missed, but it's still kind of fun. Glory, a 400yo vampire decides to give up the Vegas showgirl life and move to Houston to open up a 24-hour consignment shop - which, of course, is instantly a hit. Plus, she's juggling two super sexy men, a dog that communicates telepathically, and a rogue vampire hunter. And I'm only...more
Chick-lit at its worst! I bought this because I liked the cover and title and hoped for a Queen Betsy type read. Nope, no such luck. Glory is a pain in the butt who whines on constantly about her weight, moans about having the boyfriend who adores and protects her and is of course obsessed with fashion and describing everything she sees. Yawn. The talking dog was the only thing that got me through the first few chapters and by then I couldn't bring myself to care about anyone else introduced in...more
4 likes · like · see review
I actually bought and read this when it first came out. Apparently at that point it made some sort of impression on me because I bought the second book in the series. However, as I picked it up a couple weeks ago, I realized I really only remembered the premise almost none of the plot point.
Gloriana St. Clair, now Glory used to be an actress at the Globe Theatre, then she met the vampire Jeremiah Campbell, now Jeremiah Blade. She wanted eternal life with him; to her eternal regret, she didn't kn...more
Gloriana St. Clair, now Glory used to be an actress at the Globe Theatre, then she met the vampire Jeremiah Campbell, now Jeremiah Blade. She wanted eternal life with him; to her eternal regret, she didn't kn...more
Gerry Bartlett broke the mold when she came up with Glory St. Clair. Glory is a 500 years old plus vampire who has become a total modern girl. She is a "real" woman, meaning a size 12 and not a size 2 like most heroines found in romance whether they be historical, modern or paranormal. This first book in the Glory vampire series is funny, heartwarming and very erotic. It is also very refreshing to read about the potluck of characters that Glory surrounds herself with, including her creator and l...more
Cute book, and an inviting start to the series; it doesn't take itself too seriously, it's steamy enough to raise one's temperature, but not enough to cross the boundary into pornography, and the swearing is kept to a non-distracting minimum. (I don't mind the F-bomb, but it makes me wonder, when authors use it almost as often as the word 'the', if those authors are trying to compensate for something--either a deficient story or a deficient vocabulary.) Sure, there are some moments of idiocy whe...more
From : http://www.fantasticfiction.co.uk/b/g...
What, did you think all vamps were pale, thin and brooding? Don't I wish.
Gloriana St. Clair is an eternally "full-figured" vampire-she just happened to be bloating when a sexy Scotsman sank his teeth into her. She and said Scot-Angus Jeremiah Campbell III, aka Jeremy Blade-have been on and off again for centuries, currently off. A couple hundred years has taught them how to press each other's buttons-in good ways and bad.
Glory's headed for Austin...more
What, did you think all vamps were pale, thin and brooding? Don't I wish.
Gloriana St. Clair is an eternally "full-figured" vampire-she just happened to be bloating when a sexy Scotsman sank his teeth into her. She and said Scot-Angus Jeremiah Campbell III, aka Jeremy Blade-have been on and off again for centuries, currently off. A couple hundred years has taught them how to press each other's buttons-in good ways and bad.
Glory's headed for Austin...more
I've heard so many great things about this author, so I was so happy when I saw this one just sitting on my library shelf. I love the pnr genre, and one of my favorite subsets is the funny/lighthearted ones. Glory is a plus-size vampire and is grousing about her on again off again vampire boyfriend (Blade) for the majority of this book. She is moving on with her life and starting a new business in Austin, and he doesn't want her on her own because of a vampire hunter that's in that area. Glory,...more
1 like · like · see review
I thought this story started out kind of slow. At first I didn't think I was even going to like it. Yet the farther into the book you go, the more you want to keep reading. It's really fun to watch Glory "live" and learn. She might be 400+ years old but she still has A LOT of learning to do. The main character is trying very hard to separate herself from the man who changed her into a vampire, it's like you're watching her fall out of love only to keep falling in to it again, like an old married...more
I found out about this series from some of the lovely ladies on our Facebook page and I couldn't be more happy about it. This book was great and I can't wait to read more from this series. If you guys haven't read it yet, then you definitely need too.
Glory is a vampire that's just trying to live her life. She's working and trying to figure out her love life. She just moved to Austin, Texas and she is starting a new business. Just your regular woman. Except for the fact that someone is trying to...more
Glory is a vampire that's just trying to live her life. She's working and trying to figure out her love life. She just moved to Austin, Texas and she is starting a new business. Just your regular woman. Except for the fact that someone is trying to...more
It took me an age to get through this book. I spebt a whole week dodging it. But finally buckled down to finish this.
It started out promising, but I didn't see a running plot apart from moving to Austin to open a vintage fashion shop, then it sneaked it, then walked out the back door only to reappear dozens of pages later. It was like the author was trying to focus on Glory's life rather than the storyline. It was way too long and could have done with editing things out, many scenes that didn't...more
It started out promising, but I didn't see a running plot apart from moving to Austin to open a vintage fashion shop, then it sneaked it, then walked out the back door only to reappear dozens of pages later. It was like the author was trying to focus on Glory's life rather than the storyline. It was way too long and could have done with editing things out, many scenes that didn't...more
1 like · like · see review
The title and the cover of this book made me expect a funny paranormal chick-lit but overall what I got was a silly story with awful details, specially Damian.
Real Vampires Have Curves starts really well with Glory, our heroine in this first person narrative, laying out the facts of a vampire's life. She does a fast summary of her five hundred years in a way I could imagine a fast-talking woman who gives too much information per second superficially going through very determining facts. Very en...more
Real Vampires Have Curves starts really well with Glory, our heroine in this first person narrative, laying out the facts of a vampire's life. She does a fast summary of her five hundred years in a way I could imagine a fast-talking woman who gives too much information per second superficially going through very determining facts. Very en...more
3 likes · like · see review
Real Vampires Have Curves introduces Gloriana St. Clair, a plus size vampire with a larger than life attitude. Glory has just moved to Austin, Texas to open up her very own vintage clothing store, Vintage Vamp’s Emporium. The name obviously has a double meaning. Shortly after Glory arrives in Austin, a crazy vampire hunter comes to town and starts murdering her fellow fanged friends. Glory’s on and off boyfriend, Jerry (aka Blade), starts becoming even more overprotective than usual as a result,...more
This is a contemporary fantasy with a chick-lit tone, which I generally like. I finished it, but never once felt any enthusiasm for the book as I read. I think one of the the problems was a lack of character development by the author. The first half of the book introduced a new character every couple pages, so there was never any time spent getting to know each of them.
Basic idea: Female vamp (Glory) moves to Austin and opens a vintage store, only there's a nasty vampire hunter around that's at...more
Basic idea: Female vamp (Glory) moves to Austin and opens a vintage store, only there's a nasty vampire hunter around that's at...more
Cute cover. Especially how it shows Glory in her antique shop. "Vintage Vamp's Emporium", don't you just love that store name? It sounds so cool! I think for this review I'll tell you what I hate and like about a couple of the characters.
Glory: She's creative. She's strong. Except when it comes to Blade. Or Damen.
Blade(Jerry): I like that he's protective of Glory. But, seriously, give her a break! You can't always protect her.
Damen: *shudders* I hate his character, but in a way, he kind of had...more
Glory: She's creative. She's strong. Except when it comes to Blade. Or Damen.
Blade(Jerry): I like that he's protective of Glory. But, seriously, give her a break! You can't always protect her.
Damen: *shudders* I hate his character, but in a way, he kind of had...more
I liked this one! Wouldn't say I loved it to pieces and I am going to move on to another series until I find one that I just can't put down but it was a good story line and I will probably pick this series back up again later. It had a "down to earth" feel complete with self consciousness about being overweight and how to pay the bills ... not TOO much "smut" but had some steamy scenes... The only thing that really bugged me was - you would think after being a vamp for hundreds of years you woul...more
It wasn't spectacular, but it was a fun little light read. Honestly, I'm just getting sick of vampires, so I don't know if I'll finish the series, but I'll keep it in mind next time I need a beach book. And the whole "curvy" girl thing-- the main character is supposed to have a bit of extra jiggle, which is fine, but there are so many mentions of it that it gets distracting. That said, she isn't a typical damsel in distress OR creepy classic horror movie trope, which is a nice change of pace (as...more
This is book one in the series. Wildly entertaining. One of the best vampire romance novels I've read in recent history. Glory, our heroin, has been a vampire for a very very long time. She was turned by the love of her life, Jeremiah, who has an on-again off-again relationship. She decided to move to Austin and open up a vintage clothing store when the killings start. A hunter is out to kill as many vampires as possible and wear their fangs as a badge of honor. Glory learns to get in touch with...more
I enjoy these reads for what they are-quick, fun fiction that I can read on the train without using too much brain power. I think the author has a fun premise and isn't trying to be something she's not BUT could do more with a little fleshing out of her female characters. But it's a mindless good time and I've already read three of the books in the series. I'm not hooked but I could definitely see myself finishing them all. it's a good brain break and definitely a good beach read if you're looki...more
This book was a quick and enjoyable read. Think Sookie Stackhouse (Dead Until Dark) meets Bridget Jones (Bridget Jones's Diary) with a love interest in the vein of Jamie Frasier (Outlander) and another love interest that makes Eric Northman's manipulations (i.e. in All Together Dead) look downright innocent. Win! It isn't high literature, but the writing is pretty solid and it was a fun concept with good characters and interesting details (running a vintage store, going to night vampire church,...more
Being a huge Sookie fan, I found the first Glory book to be a fabulous, fun read. I've read some of the critiques here and some of them have merit but I have this thing for people who complain about books not being very realistic in this genre. Um, we're talking about Vampires and talking dogs and shape shifters. The read is for fun. It made me smile and made me laugh out loud and kept me turning the pages. For all those reasons, it not only gets a full 5 stars from me but I will be going out th...more
For me something was lacking in this story, maybe it is because I did not really take to Glory St Clair who has been a vampire for a few centuries but refuses to embrace the new skills she acquired - such as the ability to heal wounds and to change shape. She also has her maker who cares for her but it a bit arrogant (as are most male vampires) who she has an off on relationship with. In this story I don't feel that I chance to get to know Blade very well.
I didn't really enjoy the storyline eith...more
I didn't really enjoy the storyline eith...more
Nothing better than a book about vampires protecting the incredible interesting (and long) lives! This steamy book is a real page turner that will leave you wanting more. Glory is pursued by her on again/off again lover (and maker) the handsome (and Scottish) Jeremy Blade. His only goal? To protect Glory, not by her choice. Blade friend,the wealthy (and Italian) Damian, puts the move on Glory. Between two sexy vampires and a crazy billionaire hunter bent on killing Glory, how will she ever pull...more
I was really impressed with this book. Okay, at the beginning, it was a bit on the boring side, but once it got going, it was very funny and exciting. I think seeing a curvy woman who still had issues with her body made it much more real. I felt a lot better about my own body reading this and seeing hot men drool over her was something of a confidence boost. I think it was better than her being completly fine with her body. If Glory can live for hundreds of years and still feel insecure, then I...more
Originally posted here as part of the 30 Day Book Challenge.
Heh. Listen. I'm about to talk about something that I'm sure will just SHOCK you guys. And not in a good way. But I am playing to the letter of the law, or something.
I don't know, I've had a glass of wine and haven't eaten much today, so you know.
A Guilty Pleasure Book
I am TOTALLY passing the buck on this one. I don't generally read a whole lot of paranormal romances or erotica, but Em was talking to me a few years ago about how she'd...more
Heh. Listen. I'm about to talk about something that I'm sure will just SHOCK you guys. And not in a good way. But I am playing to the letter of the law, or something.
I don't know, I've had a glass of wine and haven't eaten much today, so you know.
A Guilty Pleasure Book
I am TOTALLY passing the buck on this one. I don't generally read a whole lot of paranormal romances or erotica, but Em was talking to me a few years ago about how she'd...more
In Real Vampires Have Curves, plus sized vampire Glory St. Clair fights for her independence as a woman by opening up an antique store, fighting off the advances of both her ex-lover Blade and casanova Damian. The male vampires’ protective instincts kick into high gear when Westwood, a vampire hunter, starts making his presence known, and Glory becomes one of his future targets.
I have a lot of things to say about this book, and unfortunately, most of them aren’t positive. Here’s the good-bad-u...more
I have a lot of things to say about this book, and unfortunately, most of them aren’t positive. Here’s the good-bad-u...more
What - did you think all vamps were pale, thin and brooding? Don't I wish.
Gloriana St. Clair is an eternally "full-figured" vampire-she just happened to be bloating when a sexy Scotsman sank his teeth into her. She and said Scot- Angus Jeremiah Campbell III, aka Jeremy Blade-have been on and off again for centuries, currently off. A couple hundred years has taught them how to press each other's buttons-in good ways and bad.
Glory's headed for Austin and a new business venture: Vintage Vamp's Em...more
Gloriana St. Clair is an eternally "full-figured" vampire-she just happened to be bloating when a sexy Scotsman sank his teeth into her. She and said Scot- Angus Jeremiah Campbell III, aka Jeremy Blade-have been on and off again for centuries, currently off. A couple hundred years has taught them how to press each other's buttons-in good ways and bad.
Glory's headed for Austin and a new business venture: Vintage Vamp's Em...more
Normally I am a fan of this type of stuff, as stereotypical as the whole vampire genre is, but this one I just couldn't figure. Sticking a couple hundred year old guy with a Scottish accent with a slighly overweight woman that he 'sired' was not that entertaining. I knew from the first page that they were going to end up together and the whole story was just very predictable. I learned that I want to shock readers, and send them thinking in a way they wouldn't have thought a way they would befor...more
I have read this book before. Ok, not this exact book. Yet so many parts of this book are in others I have read from this genre. Here’s the jist: Glory, a fuller-figured vampire, owns a vintage clothing store in Austin. She is becoming immersed in the town’s local vampire community and enjoying her new store and apartment. Then vampires start turning up dead, with arrows or crosses through their hearts. The killer has caught sight of Glary and seems to be targeting her as his next victim. Now he...more
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Gerry Bartlett figures that vampires are pretty much like everyone else except for the liquid diet.
Eternity or Mexican food? Tough call.
Then there’s the whole problem with sunlight. When would she treasure hunt for her own antiques business on the historic Strand in Galveston ?
Gerry’s a native Texan and lives halfway between Houston and Galveston with her own wonder dog, a Bedlington Terrier na...more
More about Gerry Bartlett...
Eternity or Mexican food? Tough call.
Then there’s the whole problem with sunlight. When would she treasure hunt for her own antiques business on the historic Strand in Galveston ?
Gerry’s a native Texan and lives halfway between Houston and Galveston with her own wonder dog, a Bedlington Terrier na...more
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Jul 03, 2008 05:44am
Oct 13, 2011 07:24am