Living Islam Out Loud: American Muslim Women Speak

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Living Islam Out Loud: American Muslim Women Speak

3.62 of 5 stars 3.62 · rating details · 104 ratings · 18 reviews

Living Islam Out Loud presents the first generation of American Muslim women who have always identified as both American and Muslim. These pioneers have forged new identities for themselves and for future generations, and they speak out about the hijab, relationships, sex and sexuality, activism, spirituality, and much more.

Contributors: Su'ad Abdul-Khabeer, Sham-e-Ali al...more

Paperback, 224 pages

Published August 15th 2005 by Beacon Press

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Mar 04, 2009 Bruce rated it 4 of 5 stars

"It has been said there are as many paths to God as there are individual souls. Living Islam Out loud is a collection of essays written by American Muslim women about their experiences in searching for God. The editor’s intention is to “humanize American Muslim women to our fellow citizens of the world.” For many of the essayists, including the editor, “alienation from the mainstream Muslim community was a perquisite to our personal transformation.” She notes that each culture comes with its own...more "It has been said there are as many paths to God as there are individual souls. Living Islam Out loud is a collection of essays written by American Muslim women about their experiences in searching for God. The editor’s intention is to “humanize American Muslim women to our fellow citizens of the world.” For many of the essayists, including the editor, “alienation from the mainstream Muslim community was a perquisite to our personal transformation.” She notes that each culture comes with its own interpretation of Islam but these women are all looking for “a more gender equitable and humanistic Islam.” In many of these ‘soul journeys’ the contributor is also “searching for the divine feminine in Islam.”
Three criteria had to be met for an author to be included: 1) “she must have been raised as a Muslim in America,” 2) she must be “contributing to public life in an extraordinary way,” and 3)”she must possess the will and the courage to share honestly the experiences that shaped her life.”
The editor leads off with her own story of her parents’ conversion to Islam and being raised a Muslim. She was raised with cultural baggage that caused her to endure a bad marriage for longer than necessary.
One young woman writes of being raised in the Desi culture and finding out that “our parents’ affiliation with Islam” about which some had little knowledge, was a way of holding onto their homelands of South Asia. Is that any different than most immigrant cultures which have congregated around ethnic churches until the second and third generations have moved away? She discusses the establishment of a dichotomy, “God’s Way or Satan’s way” which really meant parent’s way or Satan’s way, as “militant Islam in the kindest and most innocent of ways.” She continues with “[m:]y understanding of Islam was limited to my community’s teachings,” which essentially meant women being treated as chattel. This woman also had failed marriages, fell away from Islam and then returned to a more inclusive Islam.
The “Black, American, Muslim” historian tells of being raised in the Nation of Islam and then running into Muslim gender discrimination when she first left home.
In the introduction to the section on Love the editor notes that no one wants to talk about sex and sexuality and this attitude breeds dysfunction. A poem on interracial marriage begins the section. A Palestinian American woman tells of how she internalized the community’s attitude that a “being a quiet and demure girl was the path to being a respectable and pure woman.” This led her into a traumatic first marriage. However, since her divorce she realizes she has been given a second chance. This essay is followed by one that goes against the ideology is that a Muslim man can marry a non-believer but a Muslim woman can only marry a Muslim man. It is about a Muslim woman who is happily married to a non-believer, i.e. non-Muslim.
In ‘Fumbling Toward Ecstasy’ the essayist discusses sexuality and the problem of not discussing it. She doesn’t believe the ‘reality of many Muslim women [male primacy:] is true Islam which is one of gender equity. A lesbian’s essay concludes the section and provides insight into that which is not discussed.
A poem thatt starts as a woman is trying to pray leads into a discussion of hijab and is a good link between the sections on sexuality and faith. An activist from Harlem is the next essayist. She uses a quote from the Prophet Mohammed to set the theme – if one sees an evil action do something to correct it. Her essay is one of constant activity to improve herself, her community and humanity. Morgantown, W.Va. is the scene of the next essay. Betrayed by her Muslim boyfriend, this contributor faced the stigma of being an unwed mother and fought for the ability of women to enter the mosque by the front door and pray in the main hall, just like the men. This essay is a discussion of her fight against gender discrimination. It is followed by two Islamic Bills of Rights for Women, one for the Mosque, the other for the Bedroom.
The last section is entitled ‘Soul Journeys.’ In the lead essay the writer is asking “Where and what is Islamic purity? Where and what is the truth?” and “how does it relate to my searching soul?” She reviews her childhood experiences that “emphasized punishment, ritual for ritual’s sake, and superstitution misunderstood as religion.” She notes the obvious reference to patriarchy in the Qur’an. Eventually she finds a ‘clearing’ that frees her from her past while retaining Islam. In ‘Siren Song’ a performer who had believed that “my desire to share my creativity with others was at odds with my identity as a Muslim woman” because she had been taught that ‘women and performance do not mix.’ She found her voice by a different interpretation of Islamic strictures. A poem about one of the divine women in Islam’s history separates this from the last essay. ‘My Son the Mystic.’ This essay is by the mother of an autistic boy. The meaning for this woman’s life “originated from the maternal womb.” She had strictly followed conservative Islamic requirements, complying with the teaching that anything that might attract a man, including the voice, should be concealed. Why, she wondered, after following all the rules was her son autistic? She turned to the ‘outside’ community when her local Muslim community provided only the common clichés to her question. The book ends with another poem, “My Sister’s Prayer.”
Unlike the book “American Islam,” this book is a collection of essays written by different women. Each has her own story but with a common thread, a search for God. It is a must read for all desiring to understand issues American Muslim women face and how some young women addressed them."
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Dec 05, 2010 Yousef M rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: islam, women

This book is very inspiring and motivational in its depictions of several Muslim American women activists and feminists and the obstacles they've had to overcome in voicing opinions that are often unheard or, worse, intentionally ignored by chauvinistic Muslims. I'm glad they came out with a book like this, especially one that is more reflective of the progressive outlook which many Muslims (myself included) would like to see more of.

However, I do think readers should be aware much of the conten...more

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Mar 30, 2010 Yoonmee rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: spirituality

This is a wonderful collection of essays by amazing, inspirational American Muslim women. Keep in mind that the book isn't entirely representational of all American Muslim women (but what book could possibly represent everyone?). The writers were chosen by editor Saleemah Abdul-Ghafur based on this criteria: must have been raised Muslim in America, must be contributing to public in an an extraordinary way, and must possess the will and courage to share honestly. In that sense, these are the essa...more

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May 02, 2012 Tinea rated it 4 of 5 stars

Recommended to Tinea by: Seyyedreza

Shelves: gender-sexuality, philosophy-and-religion

Powerful collection of life experiences written by American Muslim women, essays and poetry. Diverse life paths, religious convictions, and backgrounds are represented here, allowing space for different Muslim women to situate themselves, their struggles, and their desires (political, spiritual, and personal) within this US context of patriarchy, white supremacy, Islamaphobia, xenophobia, secular liberalism, and many things wonderful, empowering, and fulfilling which don't sum up into those neat...more

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Sep 03, 2011 Louise Dunlap added it Recommends it for: Anyone who is curious about Muslim women

Shelves: nonfiction, religion

What an awesome book! If you're curious about American Muslim women and want to encounter a variety of viewpoints on the topic, this is an excellent choice.

These essays by American Muslim women, cover a variety of topics: to hajib or not hajib, which can also have political connotations on top of religious ones; women fighting for the right to be equal members of mosques; marriage; American Muslim women who were born in the US or came here as immgrants; and a lesbian American Muslim who must wri...more

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Feb 14, 2008 Shaheena rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: All Muslim Women Living in the West

Recommended to Shaheena by: [Living Islam Book Club]

I learned so much and it is apparently so controversial but this is what I learned from it.

I was moved by this book by identifying so much with the women and admiring these women even if I don’t necessarily agree with all their viewopoints. It was mentioned in the book that each of these women came to some of this realization after feeling judged and outed by the community. I can identify with that. I'm still trying to find my way back and am inspired that they did so much. I'm not sure I have t...more I learned so much and it is apparently so controversial but this is what I learned from it.

I was moved by this book by identifying so much with the women and admiring these women even if I don’t necessarily agree with all their viewopoints. It was mentioned in the book that each of these women came to some of this realization after feeling judged and outed by the community. I can identify with that. I'm still trying to find my way back and am inspired that they did so much. I'm not sure I have the strength yet though to do all that..

To your point Sumi, I think we all figure it out when we are in that situation. I was brought up as the Muslim good girl for whom everything was black and white. I learned a few shades of grey in college and fought off arranged marriages for a while. Circumstances finally led me to an arranged marriage at age 25 after many issues (and a broken engagement before that). I am now 37 going on 38 so I was one of the first girls in the 'community' to get married. In fact after my broken engagement (again due to greediness and insaneness and black/white judgements by the guy's side), I was pitied by the community that I was damaged and needed to accept any offer that came to me. Well the marriage ended up being based on lies on their side and the whole Muslim community that was with me on my wedding day turned their backs on me. No one asked me about the abuse or issues but judged me that I was the woman and had to have made it work. Thank God my parents didn't feel that way and supported me and got me out of it. During that time, I questioned and actually fought with Allah about why this was happening to me. I also questioned the role of Muslims in our communities to support each other. I was deeply disappointed. Even the Imam I went to for help turned out to be a fraud and when I asked what to teach the children of the next generation he told me not to worry about the Ummah.

To this day (nearly 12 years later) people in the community remark on me as that girl who got divorced. I also have been branded as a divorcee and not marriageable even though our prophet married a woman older than him and also someone divorced. I lost a lot of faith in Muslims as a community but never lost may faith in Allah even though I questioned it. Later on when my mother died and being on the 'marriage circuit' up until age 37 as a Muslim divorcee, I have learned even more about judgement and the lack of support for women in our community. At one point I was actively volunteering for Manavi (an organization for South Asian battered women) and was told that I should no be volunteering for a 'hindu' organization when in fact the organization helped many Muslim women who were not being helped by the mosque but in fact being told to basically suck it up. One such woman was told to just go home and make it work by the mosque counselors after being hit with a horse whip!!!! In addition, I have found the attitude towards rape (I was told I could not be raped as a wife is never raped in Islam) and incest in our culture (the attitude that we don’t have it in Islam) is a crock!! We need to change those attitudes and by teaching by living our lives as the type of Muslims we want to see.

My friend Zeba took me to a Hamza Yousef lecture 2 years ago that finally opened my mind to an Islam that may be different from our parents' views. A uniquely American Islam. Up until then I was disgusted by Koranic translations by Maududi (who was very close to my family) when it came to women and although I didn't want to leave Islam or Allah, I didn’t know where to go. I think finding our own way and the 'greys' is what we will all end up doing and that is the only way to revolutionize this for us. Our community needs to rethink how we treat each other, especially women. I truly feel that currently they are not being Islamic. I'm not as courageous as the women in the book, but I hope to get there one day. In the meantime, I do love Islam and finally met a man who is outside of normal Islamic cultures and he converted after seeing my love for the religion. I have warned him that it is not what exists out there but I hope these types of groups help us fix that.
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Jun 28, 2007 Ay rated it 3 of 5 stars Recommends it for: all muslim women everywhere

Shelves: prettygood

i enjoy this book for many reasons. it's not the first muslim women's anthology of experience that i've read, but i think it is the first compiled by an american black muslim woman. ( saleemah abdul-ghafur also co-created Azizah magazine, which was on the cutting edge before alot of these other magazines, delving into topics such as female filmmakers and domestic abuse. ) in some ways can relate to the editor - growing up american, female, muslim and black and having to deal with some of these i...more

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Jan 12, 2009 Eunice rated it 5 of 5 stars

Anecdotes of those who have many number of identities: American, Muslim, Woman, Teachers, Wife, Mother, and more. They talk about struggles, joy, love, sex, job, education and family, and their lives. Cultural aspects and religious elements combined together, their struggles to synthesize their own identity. Very honest and strongly appealing stories.

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Oct 01, 2007 Roberta Davenport rated it 3 of 5 stars

I first came across this book when I attended a talk the author gave at a divinity school in Berkeley, CA. The book tends to focus on the negative and also devotes a lot of time to not-so-mainstream experiences, which may or may not mislead one into thinking that certain experiences are more common or usual than they are. That being said, I think that because this is the case, the narratives in this book are of a type too-often ignored by the mainstream Muslim community. Whether or not you agree...more

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Jun 26, 2012 Ariel rated it 3 of 5 stars

Some of the women annoyed me and others were very compelling; overall I'm glad I read this book. I don't know as much about Islam or about women's experiences in Islam as I would like to, and this was a good start. There were a lot of common themes in the stories, but each woman also had a unique perspective. Generally, it was well-written and illuminating.

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Sep 19, 2012 Waheedah Bilal rated it 5 of 5 stars

The voices of an eclectic group of young American Muslim women bring joy, tears, and insight as they share their lives.

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Mar 19, 2013 Miami University Libraries added it

Shelves: women-authors

King Library (2nd floor) | BP67.A1 L58 2005

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Aug 22, 2010 Mohamed rated it 1 of 5 stars

I really didn't like this book. I just reached a point in the book that could not read it any longer. Some of the narratives were extremely brave but some things are better unsaid. When Allah veils us and conceals our sins; it ungrateful to share them openly.

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Feb 28, 2009 Ellen Keim rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: religion

This wasn't quite what I expected. I thought it was going to be about American women converts to Islam. But in fact it was about women who were born Muslim and then had to find ways to reconcile their faith with their nationality. Still a good read. I recommend it.

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Aug 22, 2008 Amber Buchholz rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: everyone

Recommended to Amber by: Tasnim

I cried my way through this entire book. This is essential reading to anyone who takes seriously the Muslim woman's struggle to discover herself, reclaim herself, and walk with dignity on her spiritual path.

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Nov 22, 2007 Hafsa rated it 3 of 5 stars

A few powerful narratives, but the themes became a bit repetitive. Would have been nice to see more diversity in terms of ideologies of the contributors.

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Jan 23, 2008 Fatima marked it as to-read

Shelves: herstory, americanmuslim

not SS 297.082 LIV

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Oct 17, 2010 Akili rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Yes.

Sometimes I feel isolated in, what people call, progressive American Islam. I know that I'm not and this book reiterated that for me. The theme that every faith journey is different, that Allah is accessible to us even if we're not disposed to the most traditional interpretations of the Prophet's words and that Allah has given us the capacity to form our own blessed identity within His will was great.

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May 17, 2013 Kelly rated it 5 of 5 stars

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Apr 21, 2013 Heather rated it 4 of 5 stars

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Apr 20, 2013 Assata Ali rated it 5 of 5 stars

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