Storms Can't Hurt the Sky: The Buddhist Path Through Divorce

by Gabriel Cohen

book data

5 ratings, 3.80 average rating, 3 reviews (more data...)

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5		20%
4		60%
2		20%

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published

March 1st 2008 by Da Capo Lifelong Books

binding

Paperback, 256 pages

isbn

1600940501 (isbn13: 9781600940507)

description

Personal, practical, down-to-earth--and the first book on the subject of using Buddhist insights to heal the anger and grief of romantic break-ups. ...more

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other reviews (showing 1-13 of 13)

All ratings | 5 stars (1) | 4 stars (3) | 2 stars (1) | avg 3.80

all | this edition

Mazola1 rated it:

07/11/08

The only bad thing about this book is the misleading subtitle. Cohen sells himself short by implying that his book is intended for and only useful to those undergoing the breakup of a relationship. Actually, the book has wonderful, clear and useful insights for anyone who wants to be happier and wants to learn how to cope with the inevitable traumas and disappointments that life throws at us all. While much of the book is centered on dealing with the anger we may feel when a relationship sours, ...more The only bad thing about this book is the misleading subtitle. Cohen sells himself short by implying that his book is intended for and only useful to those undergoing the breakup of a relationship. Actually, the book has wonderful, clear and useful insights for anyone who wants to be happier and wants to learn how to cope with the inevitable traumas and disappointments that life throws at us all. While much of the book is centered on dealing with the anger we may feel when a relationship sours, its wisdom applies across the board. The subtitle caused me to put this book down three times before I finally decided to read it, intrigued by the main title, I guess. I'm glad that happened, because this is a wonderful, helpful, inspiring and down to earth book.

It could be summed up as a manual of practical advice on how to "transform adverse conditions into the path to enlightenment." Cohen poses the question, how can we move from our usual anxious, self-cherishing, relationship-sabotaging orientation toward a lighter more compassionate way of relating to someone else? He goes on, however, to acknowledge that this question is not just how we can love one other person better -- it's how we can relate better to everyone else in the world.

In other words, this is about how to become free of suffering and find true happiness. Particularly helpful is Cohen's treatment of what makes relationships work, and how we can make them happier by taking the focus off ourself, thinking about what is good for "us" rather than what is good for "me," and learning to let go of resentment and anger. And Cohen is wise enough to admit that his book does not offer a get-enlightened quick scheme. Rather, the techniques he describes, although simple sounding, obviously require attention and practice before they will really pay off.

Cohen shows in simple terms how to stop treating relationships as a "happiness-for-me machine," and how to achieve inner peace by accepting that for the most part, it is we ourselves who are the cause of our unhappiness, and that happiness or unhappiness really is something that takes place between our ears. He shows us how we can gain serenity and learn to control mental agitation by using patience, compassion and generoisty to counteract the "poisons" of anger, self-love and selfishness. While this may sound totally sappy and impractical, in fact, in the real world this type of practice does bear good fruit. While the goal may seem impractical and impossible to achieve, the steps are small and sensible. This is a book that could make a difference in the lives of those who read it. I'm glad I picked it up....less

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Peggy added it

03/05/08

Read in March, 2008

i love this book, it's been much more helpful in many ways than books by long time holy men and teachers. It's very immediate and speaks to a specific issue. Though not going through a divorce, I applied the info to other difficulties i have had with friends, family etc. this book gave me inspiration for my meditation practice, and life in general,Fed my ongoing interest in Buddhism. highly recommend.

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