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17 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do Anymore
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17 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do Anymore

3.83  ·  Rating Details  ·  904 Ratings  ·  257 Reviews
I had an idea to staple my brother's hair to his pillow. I am not allowed to use the stapler anymore.Here's a kid full of ideas, all day long. For example, in the morning, gluing her brother's bunny slippers to the floor sounds like a good plan. But now she's not allowed to use glue anymore. And what about when she shows Joey Whipple her underpants—they're only underpants, ...more
Library Binding, 32 pages
Published December 26th 2006 by Schwartz & Wade (first published January 1st 2004)
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(showing 1-30 of 1,475)
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sara sabry
what a funny book ! :)
I enjoyed reading about chilhdren's tricks ... they are so crazy..
they make alot of mistakes then they apologize about that by telling their mothers " Iam sorry"
then they make these mistakes again ! ...
children are so kind and they need more care and love ! :)
Skylar Burris
Mar 24, 2008 Skylar Burris rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: childrens
This is a funny story for the PARENT of an impish child, but I found it in the children's section of the library. I would never read this to my child again. It sends a very poor message. It gives her ideas of impish things to do she's never considered doing before -- and she's come up with plenty ideas of her own. But worst of all, it ends with the message that all you have to do is lie and say you're sorry when you're not, and then you can get away with it to do impish things yet again. Certain ...more
Amira Mahmoud
It is a funny story about a naughty kid
she always wanna to do a strange and disgusting behaviors
then she know that she mustn't do it!!

the caricatures are so funny and nice
but I think the story isn't suitable for children
it will give them more ideas to bother us :3 :D
Apr 06, 2010 Relyn rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: nobody
Recommended to Relyn by: spotted at the library
This is going to sound weird, but when I read this book it bothered me so much I put it away and came back to read it again several days later. I guess I was just testing my opinions from the previous reading. I wanted to like this book. I really did.

I wanted to like the book so much because of the incredible illustrations. They are why I picked it up in the first place and it never stops delighting. It's the story I have a problem with. At first it's a simply wonderful story about a girl who i
Amy Carr
Dec 22, 2008 Amy Carr rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: picture-book
I don't think I've ever given a book a 1 star rating...but I REALLY disliked everything about this picture book. It gives kids really bad ideas, I don't like the illustrations, the story line, the main character...yuck.
Aug 13, 2007 Molly rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: picture-books
I feel sort of mixed about this book. I really love the illustrations, and the story is pretty hilarious. It's not that I would worry that little ones would try to emulate the ridiculous mischief the character makes throughout the story; it's the tone upon which the story ends. The idea at the end is that she says she's sorry, but only because that's what her mom wants to hear; the stapler in her hand indicates that she's not about to stop doing whatever she wants. I just feel mixed. Any other t ...more
Jan 24, 2010 Tricia rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: picture, read-aloud
My 3 boys all enjoyed this book. They know how to tell right from wrong, so it's not like they're going to turn into juvenile delinquents or unholy terrors as a result of this book. And goodness knows, they come up with plenty of crazy ideas on their own. Books like this provide a reminder that not all impulses need to be followed up on. And that controversial last page? They decided that her last phrase should be interpreted in the opposite sense (not allowed to say the opposite).
Madeline Smoot
Jul 06, 2010 Madeline Smoot rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: picture-book
When this book originally came out it made a bit of a splash, but now days it seems to have been forgotten. And to me, that seems to be a shame because the book is very funny and very cute.

The books is centered around the little girl who decides to do various funny but socially unacceptable activities — like stapling her brother’s head to his pillow. Needless to say, she’s no longer allowed to do that anymore. It’s a clever, engaging book with wonderful illustrations that really highlight the ac
Feb 28, 2013 Pamela rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Pamela by: Alice Ann
Congratulations to everyone who took this book so seriously that you missed all the fun! More fun for me! For real, though--do you really think that a book about a kid doing quirky, irritating, and, yes, naughty things is really going to turn your child into some sort of rampaging psychopath overnight? This story is hilarious, and I'm sure a lot of people can relate to having done some pretty interesting things as kids ... just because! I know I had some things I wasn't allowed to do...

Let me pu
Jackie "the Librarian"
Dec 14, 2007 Jackie "the Librarian" rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: everyone!
Hilarious! When the unrepentant protagonist of this book isn't busy tormenting her little brother by stapling his hair to his pillow and gluing his slippers to the floor, she is being passionate about beavers, so much so that she substitutes them for George Washington in her report. Beavers crossing the Delaware, a beaver on the dollar bill, yes!
Fun mixed-media art just adds to the wacky hijinks.
Kate Hastings
Apr 24, 2008 Kate Hastings rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: K-2
Very funny story about a mischevious young girl who makes BAD choices to staple her brother to his pillow, put a fly in the ice cube tray and to do several things that nobody could possibly have thought to make into rules... until now.
I did not like, and I mean Ireally did not like 17 Things I'm Not Allowed To Do Anymore. I thought it would be cute and possibly with a moral or lesson learned at the end of the book (it is a children's book after all) but it wasn't like that at all and the more I looked and read through it the more disturbed I was. I read through this at the library while looking for things for my cousin's kids - this will definitely not be shared with them.

First of all the concept of this book - not a reall
Mar 30, 2015 Hans rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Borrowed this from the library to audition it as a possible niece book.* The art is great--love Nancy Carpenter's combination of textures, drawing, and photographs. Jenny Offill's story is hilarious.

And then there is this from the title page: "The text of this book is set in Regula. To achieve the mottled look, the type was printed onto paper, which was crumpled and gently filed with an emory board. The type was then resecanned and manipulated in Adobe Photoshop. The illustrations are rendered
Dec 01, 2014 Andrea rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Awards: Parenting Magazine Best Book of the Year and Bank Street College of Education Best Children’s Book of the Year.

The young girl in this story staples her little brother’s hair to his pillow. She is not allowed to use a stapler anymore. At the dinner table she decides to give her brother the gift of cauliflower. She is no longer allowed to give the gift of cauliflower anymore. The star of this story is a hugely imaginative child that only seems to get into trouble with her creativity. Every
Anna Richland
May 23, 2014 Anna Richland rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: kids
This might as well be called "an illustrated version of my life."

My daughter is the main character of this book. No question. I still remember the thrill I felt the first time I read this out loud to the child who used to write apologies on notes so she could ball them up and throw them at me. At least I never had to say "You are not allowed to apologize anymore."

The main character of this book is trapped in the beaver-obsession phase we know so well ... although at our house it is a cow phase
This highly subversive book contains a lot of creativity, but ... it does get a tad repetitive, ideas are recycled and I wish the text had been a little more engaging. Some of the 17 things are certainly more funny than others. The end however ruined the general impression for me. I still decided to rate it with 3 stars because I'm quite smitten with the mixed media effects in the illustrations. But, if this one fell just short for you, there is a sequel you still might like: 11 Experiments That ...more
Brieanna Olsen
Nov 23, 2015 Brieanna Olsen rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 307
This book describes 17 things that a little girl is not allowed to do anymore because she did them and got in trouble for them all, until she finally does something right in the end. The rhythm of this book was very entertaining, yet predictable. Something unique about this picture book is that there were a few pictures that were photo-shopped into pages of original art work, such as the food on their plate is a picture of real food. The main character continues to have bad behavior, even though ...more
Michelle McBeth
The second star is for the illustrations which are quite stunning. They were created with mixed media and digitally rendered. There are pictures of real objects hidden among the pages.

A girl tells 17 things she is not allowed to do anymore. The book has a cute premise that takes a nasty turn. The girl is not allowed to do the following things anymore:
Staple her brother's head to his pillow,
Glue her brother to the floor,
Tell her brother's fortune because she told him he would be eaten by hyenas,
Brittaney Reed
Feb 21, 2014 Brittaney Reed rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Offill, J. (2007). 17 things I'm not allowed to do anymore. New York: Schwartz and Wade.

"17 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do" by Jenny Offill and illustrated by Nancy Carpenter, follows a little girl as she explains why she is not allowed to do certain things. She glues her brother's slippers to the floor, she is not allowed to use glue, and she staples her brother's hair to his pillow, needless to say she is not allowed to use a stapler. The little girl goes through such antics and so on and so on
Danielle Rhea
17 Things I’m Not Allowed to Do Anymore reminds me of myself when I was little. This picture book is a great representation of the life of being a mischievous kid. This book was too clever and too accurate. I loved reading through it because I just thought of myself growing up. Children can relate to this in so many ways, the innocence depicted is great. It’s hard to see this through an adults eyes but the book is proving that children are just having a good time and they are so innocent in thei ...more
Sandy Brehl
There are several reasons this book makes notable lists: humor, imagination, and believability. The idea that rules are as often a reaction to behaviors as they are arbitrary is delightfully portrayed. The central character's creative approach to everyday objects and activities inevitably generate the need for highly specific rules.
The final page avoids a saccharine conclusion that allows her to stay in character.
Mary Ann
Dec 23, 2010 Mary Ann rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Kayla Strand
First off, I loved the illustrations to this book. The mixture of real life objects and cartoon characters made everything pop and seem more real. This story is about a young girl who get scolded for everything that she does, and every page ends with her saying she is not allowed to do whatever she did anymore. Any students can relate to what this girl does, except maybe trying to set a boy on fire, but otherwise her situations are not that far off from real life ones. Not only do these events t ...more
Aug 04, 2015 Molly rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
In this book, a young girl lists 17 things she did that she is no longer aloud to do. Including using the stapler because she stapled her brother's hair to his pillow.

Many people seem to find this book hilarious, but I find it more disturbing than anything. The illustrations are great, but the story promotes being mean, disruptive and dishonest. It also promotes lying. The final line says, "I had an idea to say the opposite of what I mean to trick everyone. I am allowed to say the opposite of wh
Taylor Baker-Gower
One of the most hilarious books I have ever had the pleasure of reading.
Jul 17, 2015 Melle rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: naughty kids and the people who are trying to remember why they love them
Recommended to Melle by: Tami R.
I haven't laughed this hard at a book since Jason read aloud to me parts of the introduction to John McWhorter's Our Magnificent Bastard Tongue. This is a great book for kids who are habitually naughty, kids who have trouble following rules (or who are excellent at sidestepping rules), big sisters and their poor little brothers, kids who find themselves and their ideas being shot down, and their caregivers who still love them anyway (even despite the frustration). (Thanks to workmate Tami for th ...more
Liliana Piedra
The story, 17 Things I'm not allowed to do anymore, by Jenny Offill, is a funny story about a little girl who continuously finds herself getting into trouble. Her energetic and creative ideas are what result in a few restrictions on what she can and cannot do. Nevertheless, it doesn't stop her from being a kid.
I think that kids will find this story very funny. It's great for kids of all ages. it shows kids how sometimes creativity and imagination can go too far, but that shouldn't stop them from
Ally Copper
The precocious young female narrator of "17 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do Anymore" by Jenny Offill enjoys trying ornery and destructive pranks and exploits that try the patience of her mother and other adults in her life. As she tries new, creative ways of expressing herself and leaving her mark, such as doing her George Washington report on beavers instead or setting fire to her classmates' shoe using a magnifying glass, she soon finds out she is no longer allowed to do those very things. While ...more
Lisa the Librarian
I want to say that I absolutely LOVE the illustrations in this book. A mixture of fairly simple drawings, interesting objects in the background and photos of some key focal items this is a visual feast.

However, I am counting my blessings that I do not have this little girl in my life. She is pretty much a total brat! (I did have to smile about the beavers, though, because my kids have gotten into the whole obsessing about something mode).

I think this would be a good book to give to a parent of a
Oct 25, 2013 Shantelle rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
17 Things I’m not allowed to do anymore is about a girl who torments her brother, her pet, her classmates, and, of course, her mother. This story lists many inappropriate things that she has done and the things that she is not allowed to do anymore. “The text is short, spare, and fall-on-the-floor funny—not to mention utterly child-friendly” (1). This book would be perfect for somebody who is just learning to read, it has few words on each page but still creates a very entertaining story.

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Jenny Offill is an American author born in Massachusetts. Her first novel Last Things was published in 1999 was a New York Times Notable book and a finalist for the L.A Times First Book Award.

She is also the co-editor with Elissa Schappell of two anthologies of essays and the author of several children's books She teaches in the MFA programs at Brooklyn College, Columbia University and Queens Univ
More about Jenny Offill...

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