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May 20, 2008

Micah rated it:

A common sense guide to avoiding the missteps committed by the novice. Its presented in a clear, fast-paced and entertaining way.
People who critique this book as "too basic" are probably still convinced that they have something original to add to the literary canon, or they are MFA's that are so inundated with literary criticism they couldn't recognize an interesting story if it bit them in the ass.

0 comments like (6 people liked it)

Jun 14, 2008

Ryan rated it:

A nice, light-hearted, & witty guide on some of the more disappointing mistakes beginning writers can make when writing a novel. Most of the sections were pretty obvious (duh, who would do THAT?), but others seemed eerily familiar. Problems include: "Where the author tells you what you think of his dialogue," "Wherein the author flaunts his vocabulary," "In which every single last solitary word of conversation is included," "Wherein there is a cat," " More...

2 comments like (3 people liked it)

Aug 25, 2011

Jeanette rated it:

I don't know why I find Mittelmark and Newman so entertaining, but they crack me up. My default setting is silliness, and these two are good at silly, while also providing a lot of very helpful information. I loved Read This Next, so I decided to give this one a go, even though I have no intention of even pretending to have novelistic aspirations. I enjoy books like this because they help me define why some books/authors work for me and others just make me want to stab someone.

The o More...

3 comments like (7 people liked it)

Feb 16, 2011

Rachel rated it:

I had so much fun reading this book and "laughed out loud" many a time, as my fellow BART train commuters will attest. I thought the book was going to contain examples of bad writing submitted in earnest, but actually it's a bunch of writing samples that the authors have concocted to illustrate the various nuances of bad writing style. At first I wasn't so amused, but eventually, I was won over by some of the uproariously hilarious passages. And I learned a lot about writing, too, a More...

2 comments like (3 people liked it)

Feb 05, 2009

Laura rated it:

This book is so funny and creative, I couldn't concentrate on any of the lessons. The examples were ridiculously amusing and so I really didn't get much out of it on my first reading (I will read it a second time to study it). I can tell that the writers are brilliant, knowledgeable and experienced, therefore I value this book immensely. Do all novices really write that badly?

1 comment like (3 people liked it)

Mar 09, 2011

Very rated it:

Practical advice smothered with a healthy amount of sarcasm. Even if you don’t really need their help, you’ll be completely entertained.

I especially liked this bit: “Deus ex machina, which is French for 'Are you fucking kidding me?'"

The sad part is that a lot of published novels fall victim to so many of the mistakes outlined in this book.

2 comments like (2 people liked it)

Mar 26, 2010

A.M. rated it:

Cleverly written, and quite original in its approach, telling readers what to avoid rather than giving them a prescriptive list of how to write a novel. My only complaint is the book is hard to dip in and out of, meaning I will have to reread this eventually and mark out the most interesting advice.

It's separated into 7 parts, each tackling a different aspect of novel writing, from plot and character development, to style, setting, and querying agents. Many of the examples were eeril More...

0 comments like (2 people liked it)

Feb 22, 2009

Hilary rated it:

Very entertaining for the reader - only a writer of novels will be able to tell if this is a valuable manual or not. The authors illustrate and describe their 200 worst sins of novel writing in a very amusing and eerily skillful fashion (it must take an advanced mastery of technique to get each of their examples of ineffective writing exactly right). I say ineffective writing, not bad writing, as their other piece of genius is to emulate a good writer making a mistake, rather than a doomed wri More...

0 comments like (2 people liked it)

Jan 19, 2009

Wilma rated it:

If you *don't* understand or appreciate sarcasm, run from this book. If you "get" sarcasm, you'll love it.

0 comments like (1 person liked it)

Aug 06, 2008

Tim rated it:

A hilariously well-written guide to common mistakes. You won't find all them applicable to what you're trying to do, but many of these are quite common to amateur writing. Even if you find yourself cringing at things you yourself do, you'll laugh as they point out why it doesn't work. It works better if you already have some experience writing, and it's most useful for those writing novels (as the title implies). It's not a one-stop guide, but it's a useful (and funny) addition to your "how More...

0 comments like (3 people liked it)

Jan 15, 2012

Harper rated it:

This book is one of those which should be read by people who are convinced that they are good writers, but are actually relatively awful.

There are loads of people who make the mistakes in this book who DO get published. But that's writing in general. Plenty of people who can write get nowhere and people who can't do.

But as a general rule most people who are trying to write will find that they DO engage in some of these 200 mistakes. At that point the reader can at least c More...

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Jan 03, 2012

cαss нαngs wιтн тнє cool ĸιds rated it:

I'm a young, aspiring author so this was something I definitely needed. The reviews were higher than most books like this so I was pretty happy to see when it came in from a library a good forty miles away.

Anyway, I found this book very, very helpful. I realized just how many of the mistakes I've done and it actually encouraged me to go back and edit. I'll be going over my own writing and make sure to fix the problems.

I absolutely LOVED this book too! Yes that's right, More...

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Aug 31, 2009

Katri rated it:

This is priceless. The writers go through all sort of ways in which you can write a novel badly, from flat characters to non-existent or implausible plots to unintelligible or ridiculous writing, and illustrate each problem with an extract of writing which exemplifies and parodies these mistakes. Their style is so hilarious that I couldn't stop laughing out loud, and it was so addictive I gobbled up the book in one evening. You can definitely recognise many flaws that you have seen in bad writin More...

2 comments like (5 people liked it)

Jul 30, 2009

Martha rated it:

Do you take your writing self too seriously? Is there a chance that where others see rather monstrous gaps in your work relating to the concept or mechanics of your stories, you see unappreciated genius? Does the thought of laughing at your past errors make your lip curl in derision, because if politicians can so successfully deny any and all gaffs, so should any self-respecting writer like yourself?

If so, it's time for you to read How Not the Write a Novel: 200 Classic Mistakes and More...

0 comments like (2 people liked it)

Jul 19, 2011

Carole rated it:

This is a book which had me laughing out loud and grinning wryly while making mental notes on how to avoid appearing in Volume 2.

We’ve all done it as aspiring writers; written pages of characters’ inner thoughts and memories which don’t advance the plot at all, allowed our opinions and prejudices to slow the narrative down to a snail’s pace and then topped it all off with a nice, juicy info dump. So Doctor Von Tiffin, how does your doodleflap time machine work? The audience’ More...

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Feb 16, 2009

Sheila rated it:

I checked this out from the library, and about two chapters in, I decided that I needed to buy a copy of this book. Funny down-to-earth How Not To advice. I approve.

0 comments like (2 people liked it)

Aug 31, 2011

Anila rated it:

I was going to give this book two stars and call it basic, full of rookie mistakes, until I hit the last few chapters and realized that there are people making these mistakes and still getting published. (You may have heard of them. A great number of them are vomiting partially digested versions of Twilight into the YA market.)

Given that realization, I had to let go of the review I'd been planning. Here, instead, is the one I'm making up on the spot.

I, personally, didn More...

0 comments like (4 people liked it)

Mar 17, 2009

Lord rated it:

Hilarious, true, brilliant. The only thing I don't understand is despite all of the ways one will never get published, Stephanie Meyer was able to use tenfold. I guess sometimes you can't take everything for gospel...

5 comments like (4 people liked it)

Jan 22, 2009

Helene rated it:

Easy-to-read and straightforward, How NOT to Write A Novel made me laugh with each bad example, yet, through those examples, it gave me insight on how to improve my craft. The book helped me realize a lot of mistakes I had committed on the first drafts of my novels, but it was comforting (in a way) to know that I haven't been alone in committing these mistakes.

Definitely a good book to read for a budding novelist.

0 comments like (1 person liked it)

Feb 17, 2009

Katrina rated it:

Excellent read with great tips and examples on how NOT to write a novel.

0 comments like (1 person liked it)

Feb 25, 2010

Valerie rated it:

Great book that will have you chortling with laughter and feeling very good about your own ability to write...some of the exemplars the authors provide are so gosh-darn awful, that they will make you feel hopeful about the possiblitities for your as yet unpublished novel. Mittlemark and Newman provide useful tips delivered with enormous wit and style. If you're an aspiring novelist, you just must read it!

0 comments like (1 person liked it)

Dec 21, 2011

La Stamberga dei Lettori rated it:

Di manuali di scrittura creativa gli scaffali di biblioteche e librerie abbondano: ognuno riporta la ricetta ideale per scrivere un romanzo di successo. Eppure qualcosa non funziona, perché se le ricette fossero efficaci ogni scrittore in erba diventerebbe autore da bestseller. Howard Mittelmark e Sandra Newman provano a svelare l'arcano: non è questione di cosa scrivere e come scriverlo, ma di cosa *non* fare.
Gli autori propongono quindi agli aspiranti scrittori una "guida per evitare More...

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Mar 13, 2011

Shannon rated it:

'How NOT to Write a Novel' is a very funny, witty, and effective guide for aspiring and published authors alike to better understand the creative downfalls that prevent a novel from being published.

The authors were delightfully entertaining as they outlined mistakes and issues they see when reviewing novels and share their insights with a sample piece for every issue. I was immediately drawn into the book and although I'm not at the stage for revision of my novel yet, I learned a lo More...

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Jan 15, 2012

Michelle rated it:

A very amusing and helpful book that reminds you of exactly what to avoid when attempting to write fiction. While many of the pitfalls are things most writers and prolific readers probably already know, some of them are so easy to slip into without noticing and this book serves as a good reminder.

My favorite part of reading this novel was the amusement at finding mention of the mistakes I either used to make (until I eventually realised or someone pointed it out) or the ones I sometim More...

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Jan 31, 2012

Emy rated it:

How Not To Write A Novel is an indispensible gem for aspiring writers. Instead of telling you what to write and how to write it, this book takes you through a variety of mistakes that will lead to editors promptly sending your manuscript to the rejection pile. Not only is it a useful reference point, it's also humorous and witty.

One of my favourite lines is: 'Giving a reader a sex scene that is only half right is like giving her half of a kitten. It is not half as cute as a whole kitte More...

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Oct 02, 2009

Molly rated it:

This book may be one of the best chance purchases I have ever made at a book store. Not only is it jam-packed with really excellent writing advice, it is also laugh-out-loud funny. Examples include references to Underpants Gnomes, Leonard Cohen, and characters who "go through the motions of the plot with the vacancy of bored minimum-wage employees". There were a few examples that could have been straight out of recent popular novels, dozens that I have seen time and again in fanfict More...

0 comments like (1 person liked it)

Sep 21, 2011

PoligirlReads rated it:

Well isn't that a welcome breath of fresh air: an instructional guide that is both useful and hilarious! The title is pretty self-explanatory.

The good news: it's a very useful book for first-time writers(and maybe even for the old hands too?). Sometimes the best way to figure out what to do right is through learning what is wrong and what should be avoided.

The bad news: it will ruin the reading experience for you. Now when I read my usually delightful collection of trashy pap More...

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Mar 16, 2011

Joseph rated it:

This book, as the title suggests, is a lengthy and humorous list of things you can do to make your novel unpublishable. Each item on the list is illustrated by an over-the-top example that, while exaggerated, definitely makes the point.

The Good: Very funny, and even experienced authors will benefit from some of the sections (like the one about not turning your novel into a polemic, for example). My personal favorites were the "The Crepuscular Handbag," for authors who use More...

0 comments like (1 person liked it)

Jul 30, 2010

Meaghan rated it:

Not only is this the funniest writing advice book I've ever read (the authors must be very gifted writers to write so hilariously badly) but it is also, I think, going to be one of the most useful. As it says in the afterword, if you follow all the advice on what not to do, "You could hold both Harper and Collins hostage without a chance of their employees ever agreeing to print a book on which your name appears. If Mr. Random were desperate to sleep with you, Mr. House would still step in More...

0 comments like (2 people liked it)

Apr 09, 2011

Michelle rated it:

Never have I found a writing book that was this useful and also so much fun to read. Most writing books are at least informative, but this was worth the second and third read. The examples were enlightening even if they were cringe-worthy.

0 comments like (1 person liked it)