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Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships

3.81  ·  Rating Details ·  17,553 Ratings  ·  501 Reviews
Do you realise you, and all the people you know, play games? All the time? Sexual games, marital games, complex games that you're not even aware of as you go about your usual life? You might play games like 'Alcoholic' or 'The Frigid Woman' at weekends, or perhaps 'Ain't it awful' or 'Kick me' while you're at work. First published in the 1960s and recognized as a classic w ...more
Hardcover, 0 pages
Published December 1st 1964 by Grove/Atlantic (first published January 1st 1964)
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Sep 17, 2007 Holly rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
i'm currently reading the 1960-something edition of this book although there is a 1996 edition. it really doesn't matter. i feel like i've found the holy grail. i know y'all's games bitches! that means ima gonna win! fuck yea! eat my metaphoric, insinuating, quadruple entendre shorts! really, i'm learning some heavy shit about human relationships...
اریک برن بنیان گذار "تحلیل تبادلی" با این کتاب به صورت مختصر به مباحث همین موضوع پرداخته: " حالات نفسانی" که به سه دسته ی والد، بالغ و کودک تقسیم می شوند ،"تبادل" و انواع اون از گونه های مکمل، متقاطع و نهفته و در نهایت تعریف "بازی ها" و انواعش. با توجه به اسم کتاب انتظار میره مبحث سوم مبسوط تر باشه و بیشتر بهش پرداخته شده باشه که در مقایسه با دو مبحث اول، همین طور هم هست ولی باز هم طبق تصورات و انتظاراتم نبود

با توجه به آشنایی مختصری که با مبحث اول و دوم داشتم بیشتر برای آشنایی با مبحث دوم به خون
Farnoosh Farahbakht
با خوندن این کتاب متوجه شدم که چقدر توی زندگی به بازی گرفته شدم و خودآگاه یا نا خودآگاه دیگران رو بازی دادم!!
در این کتاب "اریک برن" فرضیه ای به نام "حالات من" در خصوص حالت های روانی فرد رو مطرح می کنه که شامل "والد"،"بالغ" و "کودک" است و بعد نظریه بازی ها رو بر اساس همین حالات معرفی میکنه که هر شخص با کدوم حالت خودش وارد این بازی ها میشه.بازی رشته ای حرکت است با دام و کلک که تا رسیدن به نتیجه پیش می رود و در آن حتما برد مطرح است.
در بخش دوم کتاب نویسنده به بازی های معمول بین آدم ها می پردازه که ج
Nov 17, 2011 Mandi rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I’m glad I read it, but it wasn’t ultimately everything that I wanted it to be.

The theory at the beginning was absolutely fascinating and, even though the books itself is from the 1960’s, it has significant value for being the start of the field of transactional psychology.

However, the description of the games themselves was where I found the book lacking. Mostly, this is where I also felt the impact of the book being so dated. Some of his descriptions of games were based on stereotypical gend
Aug 22, 2007 Seth rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
smart. Falls into the category of books that give you the secret reason for why things happen the way they do.
Behdad Ahmadi
از کتاب هایی که خوندنش بر هرکدام از ابنیاء بشر واجب تاکیدی ست.
تمام زندگی انسان رو دسته بندی می کنه، و یکی از زیر-زیر-بخش هاش رو که تبادل های مضاعف یا بازی های اجتماعی نام داره، شرح میده.

برن توضیح میده که انسان سه وجهه شخصیتی داره. کودک، که تمام رفتار های خلاقانه و قانون شکن و ساده ازش منشا میشه. والد، که جنبه شخصیتیه که نصیحت می کنه، بزرگسالانه ست و درواقع اثریه که والدین ما توی ما به جا گذاشتن و ما هم اون رو به بچه هامون منتقل می کنیم. و بالاخره بالغ، که جنبه کاملا منطقی و تاثیرناپذیر از احساسا
Apr 26, 2016 Alireza rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: psychology
بخونید تا بفهمید:
اول با بقیه چه رفتاری را در پیش گرفته اید
دوم، بقیه با شما چه رفتاری می کنند
Candace Dempsey
Aug 04, 2014 Candace Dempsey rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Games People Play has a good chapter about dealing with alcoholics, but Berne's ideas (and I do mean ideas) about women and homosexuals are disgusting and sexist. This book was published in the 1960s and it shows. Scary to think modern psychologists might actually use it as a text or that college students would have to listen to Berne's ugly ideas about women and gays. Nowadays we use research, not "ideas."
James Rye

I found the general concept an interesting metaphor (rather than a scientifically proven social reality). However, I struggled to finish the book. It felt like a series of scribbled notes thrown together - a set of index cards with brief information on 'games'. I needed further explanation and an attempt to engage me rather than having a series of ideas thrown before me.
J.J. Rodeo
Dec 07, 2014 J.J. Rodeo rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: psychology, favorites
پس از خواندن این کتاب حس کردم که یک عمر سر کار بوده ام و گویا دیگران (و حتی خودم)، یک عمر من را به بازی گرفته بوده اند
این کتاب از آن دسته کتاب هایی به شمار می آید که بهتر است همیشه به عنوان یک مرجع در دسترس آدم باشد
Nov 26, 2011 flannery rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I don't know if this is a reliable textbook for day to day human interaction. This might be better retitled "Familiar Film Noir Tropes" or "Perceived and Imagined Slights from Women I've Never Met" or "Interpersonal Dilemmas in the Sunday Funnies." When was the last time you found yourself embroiled in the classic "Now I've Got You, You Son of a Bitch" or "Let's Pull a Fast One on Joey"? Can you solve the riddle of "The Frigid Woman"? This book is mildly amusing but there are too many grievous o ...more
Mar 18, 2010 Meg rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This book is a fascinating psychological journey into the minds of everyday people (including, and probably ESPECIALLY, your own). Berne's list of psychological "games" we all play with each other is fascinating, as is what you learn about yourself by analyzing which games you tend to revisit regularly.

One little warning: When you learn to recognize these games, you will be forced to eliminate at least 95% of the B.S. in your life and frequently find yourself disgusted by 100% of the B.S. in eve
Apr 14, 2007 Ali rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Highly recommended
I've read this book two times, this is the third book written by Prof. Eric Berne, which I've read up to now, and I believe this is the best one. It's hard to explain how much i've learned from this book, I think I should read the book once more to learn some new things.
This book shows you the "Games" which are behind the human's relationships, it believes that a great number of human's relations are a kind of "Game" indeed. But at the end of the book, Prof. Eric Berne explains that the highest
Oct 15, 2010 Sarah rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonfiction
Basically, you're manipulating everyone and everyone you know is manipulating you!

Admittedly, this book is flawed. Because the author is primarily concerned with interpersonal games, he tends to put every possible scenario within that context. Some of his ideas are now dated, bordering on offensive. Nevertheless, I found the book to be all kinds of enlightening and tremendously useful. I recommend it under the assumption that wise readers will be able to sort the good from the bad.
Oct 12, 2007 Beth rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: everyone who likes to understand social interaction
how to recognize patterns of behavior and
motivation inin relationships and conversations -
puts a name on various ambiguous manipulation methods
Babak Habibi
کتاب خوبی بود
از نظر روانشناسی و تا حدودی جامعه شناسی به نکته های خوبی اشاره کرد
البته به زبان ساده نبود از دید منِ، چند بار میخوندم یه صفحه رو بعضی اوقات که دقیق متوجه شم منظورش چیه
کاشکی فصل های آخر که راه های مقابله و درمانش بود رو بیشتر توضیح میداد خیلی خلاصه بود
Arash Kamangir
Feb 19, 2013 Arash Kamangir rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
گويا اين كتاب به فارسي ترجمه شده. دري بود به دنيايي كه براي من ناشناخته است. اين جور بهتره: از وجود و اندازه هاي چنين دنيايي خبر روشني نداشتم.
Nov 07, 2015 Deny rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction
Лесно може да се объркате и да посегнете към "Игрите, които хората играят" с идеята, че тя изследва ролята на играта в човешката култура и какви социални нужди се изразяват чрез някои от популярните игри. Не го правете, защото ще останете разочароване. Книгата не стои чак толкова далеч от теорията за игрите, но все пак в същността си е психоанализа на типове човешко поведение, което се среща толкова често, че може да се определи като вид игра, която индивиди с определен тип проблеми прилагат, за ...more
Tony duncan
May 06, 2008 Tony duncan rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: everyone who isn't perfect
This a an excellent readable and practical explanation of destructive social interactions, He breaks down common patterns (this is from the 60's so there are variations now) and shows easy ways to identify games that people are acting out , and what it looks like to live game-free

Berne is funny and insightful. It is a shame that so few people I know really are willing to look deeply at these kinds of issues. Sort of like feminism I find an attitude of "we're past that", but then i see all the pr
Danni Green
The basic idea behind this book -- that human interactions often follow patterns, and many of these patterns can be described in the manner of games and understood better if analyzed as such -- is fundamentally sound, and a really useful paradigm. The book contains a lot of victim-blaming and creepy gender constructions, which detract from the overall message. But I found the basic concepts to be valuable, and would be really interested to read more contemporary, less misogynistic perspectives o ...more
Oct 25, 2014 maha rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: psychology
ملخص أهم فكرة في الكتاب في فيديو
transactional analysis
والأدوار التي نلعبها

بالاضافة الى محاضرة ستيفن بينكر، لماذا نراوغ نحن البشر بدلا من ان نقول ما نريده؟
Jan 19, 2015 Rebecca rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: pop-science
This was apparently a very big thing when it was published in the 70s, and I can see why. It’s a very interesting way of viewing the world. Unfortunately, like many psychology theories, it takes what is a clever conceit that explains some odd aspects of human interaction and then tries to apply it to everything regardless of whether it fits or not. Add in some very seventies thought processes (which are rather out of favor at the moment but the author probably thought of as universal without rea ...more
رؤیا (Roya)
بازی ها در مورد روابط انسانی به شکلی بسیار خلاصه صحبت میکند. آنقدر خلاصه که در بعضی از قسمتها هنوز معنای کلام را درنیافته باید رهایش کنیم و این یکی از ضعف های بزرگ کتاب است. از نظر اریک برن روابط انسانی بر پایه سه نقش درونی انسانها در قالب "والد", "بالغ", و "کودک" به شکل بازی به نمایش گذاشته میشود. به عبارتی تمام یا بیشتر رفتارها و عکس العمل های انسانی به شکل بازی انجام میپذیرد. بازیهایی که گاهی به قصد تفریح و گاه به قصد صمیمیت و در موارد حاد به قصد آزار رساندن بازی میشوند.

نیمه اول کتاب که به ت
Jan 05, 2013 Sandra rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Had to choose between Game People Play and Reviving Ophelia for Personal Growth class when I was at MSJC (2002-2006). I choose Games People Play and I'm so glad I read this back then. What a great psychology book. You have relationships with people, but do you know if it is parent to adult, or parent to child or child to child? This book will give you examples of what a adult to adult relationship will look like as well as the others. The second half of the book goes into the games that we play ...more
Erik Graff
May 02, 2016 Erik Graff rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: TA fans
Recommended to Erik by: no one
Shelves: psychology
This was a bestseller in the sixties, getting a lot of play in the media and in popular culture. I read it in the Park Ridge Public Library during the year I was dropped out of Grinnell College while facing draft resistance charges. I'd gotten two jobs at Forest Hospital, a proprietary psychiatric facility located in Des Plaines, and thought I should bone up on psychology. Except for a course in Educational Psychology and some reading of Freud, Jung and Rollo May I really had never studied much ...more
نوازش را مي توان اصطلاحا هر نوع حركتي به حساب آورد كه به رسميت شناختن حضور ديگري را نشان مي دهد. تبادل نوازش ها رفتار متقابلي را تشكيل مي دهد كه واحد آميدش اجتماعي است. ص

اساس سراسر زندگي اجتماعي، ياري دادن متقابل براي اجراي اين برنامه است كه آدميزاد اوقات بيداري اش را چگونه بسازد و شكل بدهد. ص

صميميت تنها جواب ارضا كننده و كامل به گرسنگيِ محرك و گرسنگيِ به رسميت شناخته شدن و گرسنگيِ ساخت است. اصيل ترين نمونه ي آن، عمل بارورسازي عاشقانه است. ص

"عاقل" كساني هستند كه قادرند "بالغ" را بيشتر اوقات تحت
Mar 16, 2016 Victoriano rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonfiction
Growing up, I more or less romanticized the idea of psychology being an exact science. I thought that, with a little effort, human behaviour could be observed in a very structured manner and condensed in a handbook to help with interpersonal relationships. I have since shed some of that wishful thinking, but sometimes I indulge in that fantasy from time to time.

Games People Play is the type of interpersonal handbook that I expected to exist as a child. In the book, Berne discusses the concept o
Navid Daaria
Mar 31, 2016 Navid Daaria rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: EveryOne
Recommended to Navid by: My MoM
این کتاب رو خیلی وقته که تموم کردم. اگه یه زمانی وقت داشته باشم بعضی از مطالبشُ این جا تایپ کنم باید خیلی خیلی از این کتاب اینجا بنویسم
اگه دوست دارید بفهمین چرا بعضی رفتارها با شما دائم تکرار میشه و چرا شما دائم با آدما بازی می کنین این کتاب رو بخونین
Jan 12, 2016 Farzane rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
ترجمه ی کتاب خیلی خوب نبود. اما روی هم رفته کتاب خوبی بود.
Jul 11, 2013 Aditi rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition

Games People Play, the book speaks of the Psychology of human relationships. It introduces the theory of Transactional Analysis. The author, Eric Berne, suggests that all the communication that happens between individuals is actually a transaction between the ego states.

An ego states as he defines is “simply the combination of a person’s feeling and his behavioural patterns” and any transaction or communication between individuals takes place through the communication these ego
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Goodreads Librari...: combine editions? 3 16 Jun 20, 2015 08:59AM  
Goodreads Librari...: Wrong Number of Pages? 2 18 May 29, 2014 12:53PM  
Goodreads Librari...: Combine 3 22 Oct 01, 2013 04:27AM  
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Eric Berne was a Canadian-born psychiatrist best known as the creator of transactional analysis. Eric was born on May 10, 1910 as Eric Lennard Bernstein in Montreal, Canada.He and his sister Grace, who was five years younger than Eric, were the children of a physician and a writer, David and Sara Gordon Bernstein.David Bernstein died in 1921, and the children were raised by their mother.

More about Eric Berne...

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“Awareness requires living in the here and now, and not in the elsewhere, the past or the future.” 43 likes
“The eternal problem of the human being is how to structure his waking hours” 25 likes
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