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Jay's Journal

by Beatrice Sparks (as "Anonymous")

3.25 of 5 stars 3.25 · rating details · 2,017 ratings · 245 reviews

Jay's journal reveals his growing involvement with Satanism before his suicide at age 16.

Paperback, 192 pages

Published November 15th 1990 by Pocket Books (first published December 1st 1978)

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Jan 17, 2008 Laura rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: ya-literature, fiction

There is a possibility -- and not a faint one -- that this is the stupidest book ever written. To begin with, as with all Ms. Sparks' books, she did not "edit" the book; unless there happened to be some central office in Pueblo, Colorado or somewhere, teaching all the teenagers of the day to write in precisely the same voice with precisely the same stylistic tics, she wrote it herself, as any seventh-grader (as I was when I read this book) can glean from a three-second comparison of this one to...more

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Feb 09, 2010 Lynne rated it 1 of 5 stars Recommends it for: nobody

Recommended to Lynne by: some Mormon college friends (I was a practicing Mormon at the ti

Shelves: complete-and-utter-bs, killed-some-brain-cells, ya

I probably should add a "Mormon Propaganda" shelf for this book.

Alden Barrett was a sensitive young man, a leader on his high school debate team, a poet (his own poetry is on his headstone) with a genius level IQ who suffered from depression and committed suicide at the age of 16. He was also politically left-leaning and against the Vietnam War, unforgiveable in a small Utah town. Since that wasn't interesting enough for Beatrice Sparks, she took excerpts from only 21 of Alden's 226 journal entr...more I probably should add a "Mormon Propaganda" shelf for this book.

Alden Barrett was a sensitive young man, a leader on his high school debate team, a poet (his own poetry is on his headstone) with a genius level IQ who suffered from depression and committed suicide at the age of 16. He was also politically left-leaning and against the Vietnam War, unforgiveable in a small Utah town. Since that wasn't interesting enough for Beatrice Sparks, she took excerpts from only 21 of Alden's 226 journal entries and made shit up for the rest. The shit she made up was that "Jay" (Alden) was deeply embroiled in Satanism, mutilating animals and drinking their blood, engaging in rough sex from which his girlfriend emerged with cuts and a black eye, and stealing prescription drugs. Teen depression apparently wasn't interesting enough, and Sparks had already published a novel on teen drug abuse, so Sparks fabricated the premise that Alden and his friends were involved in Satan worship. Alden's brother Scott published a book refuting Sparks's treatment of Alden's journal. I think it sold about 100 copies and is no longer in print. People would rather believe Sparks's fake story. Alden's mother, having heard about "Dr." Sparks and Go Ask Alice, entrusted Alden's journal to Beatrice, hoping Alden's story would heighten awareness of teen depression, which was not really recognized in the 1960's. Instead, awareness of Satan worship was heightened, to the point that, once local people found out Jay's Journal was about Alden, Marcella Barrett and her family were vilified and hounded and shunned by her good Xtian neighbors and fellow church members.

Sparks commits many offenses here. First has to be the betrayal of Marcella Barrett's trust in making the story of "Jay" completely different from Alden's true story. Sparks managed to demonize young Mr. Barrett, and to this day, many wild rumors circulate around Alden's home town of Pleasant Grove, Utah; so much so that the Barretts' marriage ended and they had to move away, all so Sparks could make a few bucks.

Sprinkled liberally through the book are Mormon platitudes and, because the protagonist and the author are both Mormon, much more overt preaching than in Go Ask Alice. "Jay" recounts counseling sessions with youth leaders. The last line of the book is "Tomorrow I'm definitely going to call the Bishop (local ecclesiastical leader, similar to a parish priest or pastor.)" The afterword stated that, for "Jay," there was no tomorrow--he was found dead by self-inflicted gunshot wound that very night. Big surprise--this isn't in the journal either.

Sparks said she "fleshed out" the story using interviews with Alden's friends and family members, an assertion Scott flatly contradicts. He was the one who discovered Alden's lifeless body, and he was never interviewed by Sparks or anybody else. Unfortunately, several of Alden's friends died tragic deaths in their later teens and early 20's, most of them having to do with motorized vehicles, not Satanism; however, people will believe what they choose to, so these deaths served to fan the flames of rumor about the occultic dabbling. I guess it's plausible that Stan could take over somebody while they're driving and cause them to slam into an abutment. Without many living witnesses, aside from Scott, people swallow this book like Jell-o salad.

Sparks's final offense is in not being a very skilled writer. Her voice and style are similar in both Jay's Journal and Go Ask Alice, something I didn't notice as a teen reading the books, but upon revisiting the books in a YA lit class, the fabrications were obvious. I have not read any of her other "real diaries" (I'm not a masochist, after all); one is about an anorexic girl, another about a teenaged girl pregnant out of wedlock, and I don't remember what other issues she's written about; but I hear from those who have read them that the voice and style are similar in her other books as well. Supposedly these stories were culled from her experiences as a clinical psychologist or something, but the only information I can find on her is that she has a degree in music therapy, which doesn't exactly qualify her to work in clinical psychology. My guess is that she had a church calling as a leader in the Mormon youth group and padded her resume from that.

I read this book for the first time while still a practicing Mormon. The one scene that stands out for me, because so many of my Mormon friends pointed it out as validating Mormon dogma, was the scene where a demon introducing himself as "Raoul" appears in "Jay's" bedroom. Wide-eyed, my friends would gasp, "See? The Church is true!" because Raoul told the story of the war in heaven exactly the way Mormon teens are taught it in Seminary. Even then, cognitive dissonance was taking root. My question was, "why would a demon show up in a kid's bedroom to validate stuff he'd been taught in church?"

Sparks's exploitation of the Barretts and her sullying of Alden's name and reputation to fatten her bank account are unforgiveable.(less)

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Feb 11, 2008 Wendy rated it 1 of 5 stars Recommends it for: no one

I'd wanted to read this since I first heard about it--Go Ask Alice, now with more SATANISM!--but it was awful. Unlike GAA, this one has an actual kid's journal behind it--but the real one had nothing about the occult in it. Sparks took a much sadder, more valuable story about depression and instead has the devil make him do it.

It doesn't even have the vague readability/camp value of Go Ask Alice. It's just sad. Especially sad is that I'm certain the editor/author really believes in occult powers...more

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Feb 29, 2008 Jay Gowen rated it 5 of 5 stars

I read this when I was in high-school and remember being so engrossed in the story I could barely put it down. It's a favorite with many of my students (once they get past the initial girlfriend plot and into the second witchcraft one). I feel as though I need to read it again to update my initial reaction. Especially knowing that most of the story is fabricated....

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Sep 29, 2007 Suede rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: burnit

Oh Beatrice, if only Go Ask Alice wasn't soooooo goooooood. But your "editing" of Jay's Journal, quite frankly, SUCKED ASS. Plus now I'm scared that just by having read the book I am also a devil worshipper, and I can't turn out the lights because of the little trolls Jay kept whining about are coming to take my soul too.
I'm a little lost lamb. baaa.

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Mar 04, 2011 Michelle. Tsunami. rated it 2 of 5 stars

Lemme just get one thing straight to some people out here. The main chracter, Jay, WAS NOT ADDICTED TO DRUGS.
Sure he was a user during some moments of his life, but he was not addicted.

SO I am going to talk about some things that happened, o occures, or came up, or annoyed me from this book. This is a lesson. Not a review, but a lesson.

First thing to know. Do NOT immatate the rituals done in this book. If you do(and you're human) than you are just CRAZY. Completely insane. If you ever decide to...more

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Jul 24, 2007 Carly rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: young-adult

This one is hilariously bad. An obvious work of fiction, Jay's Journal describes the downward spiral of a teenage drug addict/Satanist who descends into madness & finally kills himself. Published in the late '70s, when an unfounded fear of Satanism was plaguing middle-class Americans, the book played off these concerns & became almost as successful as editor/Mormon youth counselor Beatrice Sparks' other "diary," Go Ask Alice. The real Jay, Alden Barrett had committed suicide, but there's...more

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May 18, 2008 Abby rated it 4 of 5 stars

I read this book in high school, I am pretty sure more than once. I just glanced through other's reviews of it, and it appears that if you read it in high school, you think it's awesome, and if you read it as an adult, you think it's totally stupid. So maybe my 4 star rating should be only for teenagers. Which none of my friends are. Man, I'm old.

It was about a Mormon kid (I recall that it never ever once specifically says he was Mormon, but man oh man, I sure seem to remember a bazillion refere...more

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May 01, 2013 Annie rated it 3 of 5 stars

I choose this book because a worker at Barnes and Noble suggested it to me when I asked for a good book. It is an anonymous journal written by a teenage genius who struggles with depression, drugs, and gets involved with witchcraft, which eventually leads him to kill himself. My favorite quote is at the very end when he says, "I don't want to be sad or lonely or depressed anymore, and I don't want to eat, drink, eliminate, breathe, talk, sleep, move, feel, or love anymore", because even though i...more

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Dec 06, 2007 Crisitna added it

this is a very very good book. i know it maybe a little wierd but it is a good book,because i know that alot of people out there have felt the someway he did at times. i know i have. this book talks about alot of things like love,hate,pain,and think about suicide. some people of there dont really have a good life and they think that the only way out is to commit suicide. if people reads this book and know that ther was someone out there that felt the someway they do then they would think the som...more

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Jun 08, 2013 Maria Contreras rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: 2012-2013

This book is one of those Go Ask Alice kind of books as well as Lucy in the Sky. I didn't really enjoy this one as much since it wasn't a lot of drama like a lot of girls have. Jay was a good kid and pretty smart during his education years. He even had the highest score of IQ so it made him a bit more special than the other kids. He fell in love with this girl and got really attached. She only used him since he was working at a pharmacy with his dad to get the drugs for her. Once he got into reh...more

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May 19, 2013 Pampa rated it 1 of 5 stars

This book was based on the journals of Alden Barrett, a teenager who killed himself at 16 1/2. The following information is more interesting then the book itself.

"Two years later, his grieving parents contacted a psychologist in Provo, Dr. Beatrice Sparks, editor of the allegedly "real-life" journal 'Go Ask Alice,' who told them she would edit and publish Alden's journal as a warning to other teenagers suffering from depression. The book's publication in 1979, as 'Jay's Journal,' shocked his fam...more

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May 16, 2013 Emma rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Jay's Journal is a true story about a 16 1/2 year-old boy named Jay. This book is all about Jay's life. Everything that he felt like writing he wrote about. He wrote about his addiction to drugs, his experience at a rehab center, and him getting into witchcraft. Jay experienced many things that eventually led to him taking his own life.
Jay was a normal teenager living a normal life, until he got addicted to drugs. Being sent to the rehab center got him into witchcraft. He felt free after leaving...more

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Apr 08, 2013 Samantha W. rated it 3 of 5 stars

As soon as I finished this journal, I felt the uncomfortable feeling of the unknown which the main character experiments with. Jay was raised in an religious household with two loving parents and younger siblings. He does was most teenagers do at 15 years old, such as trying to make the most noise in the hallway, having two close friends since kindergarten, and having an attractive girlfriend. However, Jay's new girlfriend is constantly asking Jay to get some pills from his dad's pharmacy, and...more

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Feb 10, 2013 Michael rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: young-adult, fiction

This is one of two books I read while in middle school (mandatory, of course), the other being "Go Ask Alice", so this shall be a double review, and some folks out there might not like what I have to say about them.

Upon first reading them at the tender age of 12, they scared the hell out of me, and I swore I'd never do drugs and give up that evil rock music, as did many of the kids in my class at the time.

As I got older, I noticed that many of my friends older brothers and sisters smoked some w...more

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Feb 19, 2012 Literary rated it 2 of 5 stars

I never knew there was a companion diary to Go Ask Alice until I went to Books-A-Million and saw Jay's Journal sitting beside Go Ask Alice on the bookshelf. I was curious, so I purchased Jay's Journal the same day I bought Go Ask Alice.

Let's make some quick comparisons between Go Ask Alice and Jay's Journal...

Some of the similarities:

Both books were copies of a troubled teenager's diary
Both teenagers lived in the 1970s
Both teenagers committed suicide
Both claimed to want to turn from their tro...more

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Jul 21, 2011 Owen Spencer rated it 4 of 5 stars

I wondered on multiple occasions while reading Jay’s Journal if it was true – if it was actually written by a teenager between ages 14 and 16-and-a-half. My skepticism did not stem from the story itself, but from how well some of the entries were written, and by the depth and profundity of several passages. If this is a real journal from a teenager (and there is a lot of evidence suggesting that it is) then that young man had an unusual gift of verbal intelligence. Jay’s Journal is peppered with...more I wondered on multiple occasions while reading Jay’s Journal if it was true – if it was actually written by a teenager between ages 14 and 16-and-a-half. My skepticism did not stem from the story itself, but from how well some of the entries were written, and by the depth and profundity of several passages. If this is a real journal from a teenager (and there is a lot of evidence suggesting that it is) then that young man had an unusual gift of verbal intelligence. Jay’s Journal is peppered with brilliant and poetic entries that a seasoned, professional writer would be proud to have written (in the vein of “Catcher in the Rye”). Of course, not all of its entries are equally impressive. In fact, at least half the journal sounds like what a typical teenager might write, thereby exposing the author’s youth, immaturity, and lack of wisdom. Jay’s autobiography is a cautionary tale about the dangers of sex, drugs, impulsivity, rebellion and, especially, experimentation with the occult. Although drugs played a large role in his decline, Jay’s eventual suicide was undoubtedly tied to his participation in black magic ceremonies. The most powerful entries occur at the end of the journal, where he describes his interactions with an evil spirit named Raul who successfully invades Jay’s mind and body. Raul explains to Jay that he (Raul) was cast out of the presence of God, along with Satan and a third of the hosts of Heaven. Most interesting to me is Jay’s physical description of Raul. He, reportedly, looked like a normal, attractive man in his late twenties, but the color of his skin was GRAY, and he wore a single piece of clothing that looked like a gray JUMPSUIT. That’s right, gray and with jumpsuit-like clothing… exactly how the majority of ALIENS are described in stories about UFOs and abductions. This is no coincidence, I am convinced. I see this as strong evidence supporting the hypothesis that most alien/UFO encounters are actually manifestations of “evil spirits” and demons, like those discussed in ancient writings (including the Bible). Unless you believe that this book is fictional, after reading it you will want to stay far away from anything having to do with “the occult”, because the explicit dangers of black magic are plainly exposed within its tragic and haunting pages.(less)

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Jan 22, 2011 Amccall rated it 2 of 5 stars

“Jay’s Journal” edited by Dr. Beatrice Sparks wasn’t one of my favorite books. After reading the book, “Go Ask Alice” (the companion diary) also edited by Sparks I began to further research the books. I realized that Sparks would take their diaries and twist the stories to make them more interesting. Although they’re non-fiction books they became fictional because Sparks was writing the details. Another reason I didn’t like “Jay’s Journal” is because it focused on witchcraft and evil demons.
Th...more

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Oct 27, 2010 Saira Gonzalez rated it 1 of 5 stars · review of another edition

I honestly hated this book so much that I would rate it 0.5 stars. I guess the theme of this book is insolence because in this book, fifteen year old Jay talks about how much his life sucks and how he regrets all the terrible things her has done such as stealing drugs for his girlfriend from his father's pharmacy and how he is obsessed with drugs. He commits suicide at age 16 because he "was tired of all the hassles and didn't want to do anything that living people do". Every time he is always d...more

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Apr 19, 2009 Annie rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: junior-year-2008-09

This book was written by the same author of a book I had read called 'Treacherous Love'. This book is also a non-fiction piece because it was written based on a 16 year old boy named Jay's life. Throughout this book, Jay was having troubles and turned to drugs. He used them and eventually became a Satanist. Jay gets involved in a Satan group and does some rituals. Eventually, he commits suicide on himself and dies because of his madness. I feel that this book was overall okay because it did give...more

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Apr 13, 2012 Nicole rated it 2 of 5 stars

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.

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Feb 18, 2013 Samantha rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: meh

I read this book a couple of years ago, and enjoyed it. The way it was edited was awful, however. After finishing it, I did a bit of research (on the Internet, for whatever it's worth) on who Jay used to be and his story, and what Dr. Sparks did was she took stories from several clients of hers and put little bits and pieces of it into the story of an actual boy who committed suicide (only about 20 entries were actually his). Apparently, people found out who it was that Dr. Sparks built the stor...more

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Aug 09, 2011 Jenny Young rated it 2 of 5 stars

Age:
Grades 7-12

Genre:
realistic fiction

Diversity:
Acceptance; drugs; witchcraft

Illustrations:
No illustrations

Personal response:
I read this book after reading "Go Ask Alice" and I did not like it as much. Again, this is another book that is supposed to be a real diary from a teen-aged boy from the 70's. Some of the witchcraft was difficult to believe and the lack of self-esteem from the character was quite bothersome at times. His mood was up and down throughout the book. He was an intelligent boy...more

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Jul 20, 2010 Lindsay rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: third-half

Jay's journal is a "real" journal about a boy who gets involved with Satanism. Most of the book is fictional, but some of it are actual entries by Jay himself.
Jay is a typical depressed teenage boy. He becomes interested in Satanism and joins a Satanic group. He soon has delusions, including the belief that a demon is following and haunting him. He quickly spirals downward until he commits suicide.
The book is interesting but, like Go Ask Alice and It happened to Nancy, also by Beatrice Sparks,...more

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Feb 04, 2009 Emily rated it 2 of 5 stars

I have to say that at the end I was totally disoriented by that fact that there was not an account of the kid’s suicide. I had totally forgotten that this was a diary, which is why he probably was not able to write the details of his own death. Also, maybe I was confused because I finished the book at about 2 am.

Sometimes when I read books about freaky stuff I get it confused with my own life. Like the kid got involved in animal sacrifice and then I had a dream that I tried to kill my own cat....more

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Feb 18, 2011 MaryBookSwarm rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: teen-review, young-adult

(Teen Review) Brian’s Thoughts: I would give this book a 97/A. This is probably one of the best books I’ve ever read, maybe because I can relate to it extremely well.

One dislike about this book was that the opening plot was extremely boring. I put the book down several times just because I couldn’t get into it. The book starts out with Jay obsessed with this girl—he keeps writing her poetry and drooling over her.

But then the book got exceptionally good, to where I never wanted to put it down! I...more

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Jun 21, 2008 Laura rated it 5 of 5 stars

i read this book with my teenage son. he was so into it, he read it in less than 3 hours and did not leave the couch until he was done. i really loved it as well- it was a great lesson for us all that a child does not tell you everything and that they can easily go down the wrong road even if they started off as happy children.

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May 01, 2013 Janel Rodriguez rated it 2 of 5 stars · review of another edition

I took interest in this book when my fellow classmate July Garza recommended it to me.Usually I love to read scripted diaries,but I had a hard time getting into this one.I was really disappointed and started putting it off hints why it took me longer than usually to read.I wasn't really interested in this book.
I do like the story line and his struggles as an teen falling into temptation.I was just disappointed; I feel the author portrayed him just wrong for my taste and it was a little unrealist...more

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Dec 16, 2010 Emily added it · review of another edition

Shelves: 7th-grade

Jay's Journal is about a boy who gets into drugs and learns about witchcraft. He and a bunch of his friends all start at the same time.

Jay was a nice Christan boy who played by the rules until one day he met drugs. Jay's 1st girlfriend in the book was in need of drugs badly. Since Jay's dad owns a drug store Jay could get her what she wanted.

Jay would sneak in and get her the drugs. One day he got caught by his father and his father was plenty mad.

Jay then got a new girlfriend who showed him wit...more

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May 22, 2013 Alexia added it

I don't want to rate this book because I don't feel right rating someone's diary.

I hated going through his ups and downs, I hated seeing him tormented with his struggles and not being able to reach out, I hated all the people that dragged him down and made him even more depressed - this book made me feel so much for this poor kid. There was a note at the end left by his mom that made me feel so genuinely upset for her, as well as the rest of his family - for him.

I hope that the mother was able...more

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About Beatrice Sparks

Beatrice Sparks was an American therapist and Mormon youth counselor who was known for producing books purporting to be the 'real diaries' of troubled teenagers. The books deal with topical issues such as drug abuse, Satanism, teenage pregnancy or AIDS, and are presented as cautionary tales. Although Sparks always presented herself as merely the discoverer and editor of the diaries, records at the...more

More about Beatrice Sparks...

Books by Beatrice Sparks

It Happened to Nancy: By an Anonymous Teenager, A True Story from Her Diary

Annie's Baby: The Diary of Anonymous, A Pregnant Teenager

Treacherous Love: The Diary of an Anonymous Teenager

Kim: Empty Inside: The Diary of an Anonymous Teenager

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“I am what I am for myself, to please myself and bring good vibrations to others.” — 2 people liked it

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