6th out of 60 books
—
40 voters
Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood
by
Jim Fay,
Charles Fay
Parenting little ones can be exhausting.until you discover Love and Logic. Take the exhaustion out and put the fun into parenting your little one. If you want help with: . Potty training. Temper tantrums. Bedtime. Whining . Time-out. Hassle-free mornings. and many other everyday challengesThen this book is for you!This book is the tool parents of little ones have been wait...more
Paperback, 200 pages
Published
January 1st 2010
by Love & Logic Press
(first published 2000)
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Wow.... Okay, so there are a couple (I mean literally two) of key points that work for my parenting style. However, there are some big red flags that come up for me personally. I know this is a popular method with many people so will keep my opinions close this time. Happy to talk individually w/ anyone about it though.
**Sorry, had to add a note after reading the reviews and some
great information on Psychology Today's website / magazine. I feel that I took a bit of a cowardly exit by keeping my...more
**Sorry, had to add a note after reading the reviews and some
great information on Psychology Today's website / magazine. I feel that I took a bit of a cowardly exit by keeping my...more
This book has a lot of great ideas. I think the technique is pretty good, and they write it in an easy-to-use way. However, it was so obnoxious to read that I could barely stomach the first half of the book. After that I got over the annoyance and just gleaned the good techniques. The Fays seem to be high on their own theory. They even make comments such as "Is it possible that there would be no such thing as the United States of America if King George had known about Love and Logic?" Barf! The...more
I'm not even done yet, but it's life-changing. I really love this book. Take it with a grain of salt and some prayer (like any parenting advice), but for quite a while I feel like I've been running into a brick wall with my parenting - it's not quite what I want (I get angry and frustrated way to easily and just plain don't like who I become in those moments), but I had no exact strategy to change my parenting/discipline techniques, so always ended up back in the same boat.
Enter this book, and...more
Enter this book, and...more
Jun 05, 2008
Meg
rated it
5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
ANYONE
Recommended to Meg by:
my dad (marriage and family counselor)
That's right! Another book that receives a rare 5-star rating from Meg! If you have children, or if you work with children, or if you've heard of children before, do yourself a favor and read this book NOW. All the Love & Logic books are amazing, but this one is packed with concrete examples and conversations with young kids... instead of just a bunch of theoretical mumbo-jumbo. I'm terrified to think how much worse a parent I would be if I hadn't read it.
Great parenting book! I agree with a lot of what they advocate. A few things I gleaned from it:
-Replace anger and frustration with empathy.
-Replace threats and warnings with simple actions (stop talking the talk so much and just walk the walk).
-Set limits you can enforce.
-Give away the control you don't need (give your kids lots of opportunities to choose).
-Point out your kids' interests that you notice, and resist the urge to follow it up with "That's great!". Let them have their interests with...more
-Replace anger and frustration with empathy.
-Replace threats and warnings with simple actions (stop talking the talk so much and just walk the walk).
-Set limits you can enforce.
-Give away the control you don't need (give your kids lots of opportunities to choose).
-Point out your kids' interests that you notice, and resist the urge to follow it up with "That's great!". Let them have their interests with...more
What I liked about this book:
- its clear outline and need for enforcable statements and rules, and the need to set limits and boundaries for your child
- its emphasis on staying calm, being positive and loving, even in a difficult situation
- its emphasis on teaching consequences and helping your kids learn to think
- suggesting to give lots of choices and sharing power/control where you can
What I didn't like:
- pretty much everything else. I particularly hated the tone of the Authors. They sounded...more
- its clear outline and need for enforcable statements and rules, and the need to set limits and boundaries for your child
- its emphasis on staying calm, being positive and loving, even in a difficult situation
- its emphasis on teaching consequences and helping your kids learn to think
- suggesting to give lots of choices and sharing power/control where you can
What I didn't like:
- pretty much everything else. I particularly hated the tone of the Authors. They sounded...more
[update after thinking about this a long time and worrying that I gave the wrong impression to everyone who got this email update originally]
So I have a really hard time assigning a rating to this book. The philosophy itself should get a five, because I think it is a fabulous philosophy. But the explaining of the philosophy should get a one or two, because this is hands down the most disorganized book I've ever read.
I repeat, though: the philosophy should get a five, and I'm looking into hiring...more
So I have a really hard time assigning a rating to this book. The philosophy itself should get a five, because I think it is a fabulous philosophy. But the explaining of the philosophy should get a one or two, because this is hands down the most disorganized book I've ever read.
I repeat, though: the philosophy should get a five, and I'm looking into hiring...more
Over all, I like the Love and Logic philosophy. I think it can be hard to apply without sounding sarcastic, and I don't think it fixes everything, but for the most part, I think it's good.
A word about the energy drain, which seems to be a major complaint of this book. When I think of natural consequences for temper tantrums, bickering, and general disrespect, here's the honest to God truth, when my kid acts that way, the natural consequence is that I don't want to be around him. And that's the...more
A word about the energy drain, which seems to be a major complaint of this book. When I think of natural consequences for temper tantrums, bickering, and general disrespect, here's the honest to God truth, when my kid acts that way, the natural consequence is that I don't want to be around him. And that's the...more
I don’t read many how-to parenting books, but Gage has some behavioral issues and another mother recommended this to me.
Here’s what I liked
This really will help make dealing with misbehavior easier. You let go of the anger by feigning sincere empathy for your toddler/hellion. After only a few days of trying some of these techniques my blood pressure hasn’t spiked once
I like the philosophy behind it. All that love and empathy has to be good, right?
Concrete examples of what to do in a (limited) n...more
Here’s what I liked
This really will help make dealing with misbehavior easier. You let go of the anger by feigning sincere empathy for your toddler/hellion. After only a few days of trying some of these techniques my blood pressure hasn’t spiked once
I like the philosophy behind it. All that love and empathy has to be good, right?
Concrete examples of what to do in a (limited) n...more
Parenting little ones can be exhausting...until you discover Love and Logic. Take the exhaustion out and put the fun into parenting your little one. If you want help with: * Potty training * Temper tantrums * Bedtime * Whining * Time-out * Hassle-free mornings * and many other everyday challenges Then this book is for you! This book is the tool parents of little ones have been waiting for. America's Parenting Experts® Jim Fay and Charles Fay, Ph.D., help you start your child off on the right foo...more
If you have a child between 0-6, READ THIS BOOK!!! Love and Logic is my favorite discipline program - and I've read quite a few books in an effort to not be stressed all day with my 3 kids under 4. I've had to read this book twice and listen to the audio version for me to finally start "getting it" enough to actually implement their ideas. There's really only about 4 concepts to use: Uh Oh Song, Energy Drain, Delayed Consequences, and Empathy. It takes some initial training on my part (to not lo...more
My sister gave me "Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood," and I found the book had a lot of positive concrete suggestions for parenting young children. While I never agree 100 percent with any parenting book, I found myself agreeing with the basic concepts: effective parenting comes from empowering children to make positive choices, underscored by a relationship of trust and loving reinforcement.
While the tone of the authors is sometimes condescending, I appreciated the many examples. Not ev...more
While the tone of the authors is sometimes condescending, I appreciated the many examples. Not ev...more
Love and Logic books have some great detailed information on raising kids, especially teens, that I will definitely get into again when more details are needed. For the busy, frazzled mom, THIS was an easy, quick read and immediately applicable, helping me feel a little more equipped to patiently and lovingly guide my very young children through their choices. I felt like it could be called, "helping your children help themselves, for dummies (or the dummy mommy)" and not in a demeaning way. It...more
The central idea of this parenting book (and the Love and Logic system) is a good one: instead of solving all their problems, let your children learn from natural consequences, helping them develop logic on their own. For example, if Bear throws food at dinner, dinner should be over, and I should let him go hungry for a little while. Good plan. I just don't think it necessarily works for every single scenario, especially through toddlerhood. I don't think he's ready for adult-like logic, especia...more
aside from the overly and ridiculously (at least to me with MY kids) unrealistic examples of love and logic at work with young kids, i actually thought the basic principles of love and logic make a lot of sense. i especially liked the idea that actions speak louder than words -- you don't need to give a million warnings, just one and then act on the consequence. i also appreciated the concept that you don't need to act in anger or frustration, but just put the kid in their room for as long as it...more
I loved this book. It's message is short and sweet and the writing style is so easy to understand. I love how the authors include lots of real-life examples and stories to highlight the principles they teach. The four basic principles are (1) build the child's self-concept (by allowing them to struggle and solve their own problems and through learning and thinking), (2) let the consequence do the teaching (don't lecture--use fewer words and more simple, yet meaningful, actions), (3) provide a st...more
I agree with many other reviews. The style is obvious and patronizing. However, this is a short book with the examples repeated like in a school setting. "Hear one, see one (read the example), do one (act on it at home)".
I don't like the energy drain though. I feel like kids shouldn't have to opportunity to "act up" and then "buy" their way out of it with chores.
Some chores are part of being in our family. Everyone has a part of each, parents do the hard/dangerous chores, kids help with age app...more
I don't like the energy drain though. I feel like kids shouldn't have to opportunity to "act up" and then "buy" their way out of it with chores.
Some chores are part of being in our family. Everyone has a part of each, parents do the hard/dangerous chores, kids help with age app...more
I liked this book, but I think that the subtitle is totally off: "Practical Parenting from Birth to Six Years." More like from 3 to the teenage years. While there are a few things the authors address that are applicable to infants and anyone under the age of three, most of it is not.
Other problems I have with this book:
-It definitely reads like a cheesey self-help book. Complete with catch phrases, one-liners, and mantras. These kinds of things annoy me.
-There is a lot of emphasis placed on "se...more
Other problems I have with this book:
-It definitely reads like a cheesey self-help book. Complete with catch phrases, one-liners, and mantras. These kinds of things annoy me.
-There is a lot of emphasis placed on "se...more
This is a really great parenting book for those with young children. Applying a simple principle in this book has enabled me to see a big change in just a couple of days in my 1 1/2 year old son's behavior. The Uh-Oh song is an amazing conditioning tool... when I look at my baby who is touching or doing something he shouldn't, I look at him and say Uh-Oh and start the song... he quickly moves away from what is forbidden and finds something else to do.
This is a relief since he is such a curious...more
This is a relief since he is such a curious...more
I like the theories. I don't like the writing style. It felt very patronizing and manipulative at times-- especially with the examples they gave. (John and I would read some out loud and just laugh at how obvious they were.) It felt like the authors were writing to us parents as if we're complete idiots! True, I didn't get a doctorate in child psychology, but they don't have to completely dummy everything down! Oh well.
An elementary school I worked at had bi-monthly trainings on Love and Logic,...more
An elementary school I worked at had bi-monthly trainings on Love and Logic,...more
As with most "self help" books, there were things I agreed with, and things I didn't agree with. And I think I'm done with parenting books for a while... I'm starting to worry that I'm really going to mess up my kids... furthermore... screaming and yelling at my kids is just so much easier!!
Actually, this book did help me with the eating thing... it suggested sending the child to their room if they wouldn't eat... and that has proved to be much easier than nagging them for an hour. It's only tak...more
Actually, this book did help me with the eating thing... it suggested sending the child to their room if they wouldn't eat... and that has proved to be much easier than nagging them for an hour. It's only tak...more
yes it works with certin things... but not too good in getting them to bed. Where lies my biggest problem. It seems lately my almost 3 year old doesn't want to go to bed unless I lay with him for over an hour. sorry but this is my time with my husband and I dont want to lay with him... Does that make me a bad mom? Then there is my hubby who is fine with him in bed with us. Meanwhile Iam a need to sleep girl and it is hard when I have my sons foot in my back and his head on my head pushing me off...more
Our elementary staff is using Love & Logic for professional development this year so reading this book was two-fold. One, I thought it would really help me learn more "L&L" lingo and two, it might actually help me as a parent of a two year old.
Overall, I found the book really useful. I think being familiar with Love & Logic helped-- and I might recommend reading a more basic L&L book before this one. I felt like this book assumed that the reader had some prior knowledge of L&L...more
Overall, I found the book really useful. I think being familiar with Love & Logic helped-- and I might recommend reading a more basic L&L book before this one. I felt like this book assumed that the reader had some prior knowledge of L&L...more
I got this book from one of my baby showers (Thanks Egnews!) and I've read just about half of it and probably won't pick it up again for a few months until it starts getting more relevant. But what I'm really curious to know is if there are any parents out there who have used this theory/attitude with success? I have some doubts about some of their problem-solving solutions. They say that you should always give your kid a choice about things. "Would you like a banana, or would you like an apple?...more
I quickly skimmed over this book and found a few helpful tips. I know several friends who use the Love and Logic system in their home. I've always heard positive things. I'm trying to give my children more options throughout the day so they have more choices. I feel like such a dictator most of the time. This has helped them feel more in control and then they seem to recognize when it's my choice, they need to agree to it since I've agreed to their choices throughout the day. I also feel like I...more
I read this because my cousin is an amazing mother to five kids. And when I say amazing, I really mean it. Patient, loving, kind, soft-spoken, etc. (Basically, all the things I'm not!) I asked her how she does it, and she said she owes it all to this book.
I read this book to find out her secrets. I may lower or raise my rating after I try the method on my kids. I've used it a little, and so far the results have been VERY challenging. I don't blame the method, though, I blame myself for not star...more
I read this book to find out her secrets. I may lower or raise my rating after I try the method on my kids. I've used it a little, and so far the results have been VERY challenging. I don't blame the method, though, I blame myself for not star...more
This little book is the clearest introduction I've found to the Love and Logic parenting system, an excellent system that is adaptable to situations including parenting, step-parenting, co-parenting, teaching, and counseling.
The system is based on empathy, natural & logical consequences, and helping kids make age-appropriate decisions on their own---so that they take on increasing levels of responsibility for themselves and move towards healthy interdependence. Although this book uses examp...more
The system is based on empathy, natural & logical consequences, and helping kids make age-appropriate decisions on their own---so that they take on increasing levels of responsibility for themselves and move towards healthy interdependence. Although this book uses examp...more
Hmmmm, I have to say I have a love/hate relationship with this book. I was given this book when my 1st child was a baby, and I remember reading it and thinking so much of it made sense. When I saw other parents doing things love and logic warns against, such as counting to 3, I felt like I was so much smarter than them. I wasn't going to adopt the Fays' practices in entirety, but I thought it was a useful guide. I had it all figured out. My kid would be so great.
Fast forward 7 years and add 2 m...more
Fast forward 7 years and add 2 m...more
While I think that some of the points are good ones (e.g., empathy and consequences rather than acting in anger/resentment), I was turned off by their Love and Logic Experiment #4: Have Some Fun with Temper Tantrums, where they tell parents to just "walk away" from a temper tantrum or "encourage the art form". They say to say something like, "Nice tantrum, but I think you are losing your touch. Last time you screamed a lot louder and kicked your feet a lot harder. I'm really disappointed. Show m...more
This book makes a lot of sense; so much sense, in fact, that is seems like it should be common sense, yet I hadn't ever thought of this stuff on my own. I know plenty of other parents that use Love and Logic techniques on their children with great success, and I look forward to using it on my own child. My daughter is still a bit too young for me to utilize some of the techniques, but we're already starting on as many as we can. This is a must-read for any parent.
For my own benefit, and for futu...more
For my own benefit, and for futu...more
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“happiness comes from doing great things-rather than getting great things”
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Sep 22, 2012 04:31pm
May 19, 2013 06:49am