Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read.
Start by marking “I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!: A New Understanding of Mother-Daughter Conflict” as Want to Read:
I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!: A New Understanding of Mother-Daughter Conflict
Enlarge cover
Rate this book
Clear rating
Open Preview

I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!: A New Understanding of Mother-Daughter Conflict

3.78  ·  Rating Details ·  76 Ratings  ·  9 Reviews
Almost without exception, the teen years are tumultuous for both girls and their mothers. Teen girls, who are socialized to stifle their anger and avoid confrontation, frequently take out their frustration on their mothers as the only safe and available targets. The good news is that with patience and the right guidance, mothers can transform the teenage years into positiv ...more
Hardcover, 288 pages
Published March 1st 1999 by Viking Adult (first published 1999)
More Details... edit details

Friend Reviews

To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up.

Reader Q&A

To ask other readers questions about I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!, please sign up.

Be the first to ask a question about I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!

This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Add this book to your favorite list »

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30)
filter  |  sort: default (?)  |  Rating Details
Julia
Mar 17, 2009 Julia rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Don't laugh, this was an excellent book! The main point I got from this book is that I am not alone- mother/daughter conflict is a universal problem. It was helpful to realize that the teen years are very volatile for girls, and their mothers are the only people in the world who will love them unconditionally. Hence, they take out their frustrations on us. Thank you. But, the authors have great tips on working through issues, great examples, etc. I learned a lot and I know our relationship is be ...more
Mindi Bennett
This book arrived in my mailbox and I was completely puzzled b/c I didn't order it! I figured someone was trying to give me a hint. Turns out my mom's book club was reading this and she sent me a copy she found for a penny on Amazon. With three daughters, I certainly need a book titled "A New Understanding of Mother-Daughter Conflict: Surviving and thriving during your daughter's teenage years".

Now that I finished the book, I'm super grateful that my mom sent it to me. I need to reread the chapt
...more
Sheela Word
Helpful, but could have been shorter and deeper. Too many early pages describing what will be discussed later, and how the reader will eventually benefit. Not enough meat in the later pages.

The authors' basic message is "pick your battles." They assert that the right kind of conflict can enhance a relationship. This is heartening and refreshing. Most other parenting books I've read have advocated a higher degree of patience, calm, and reasonableness than I've ever been able to achieve.

The author
...more
Rebecca
Nov 15, 2007 Rebecca rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: moms with teenaged daughters
I bought this book the day after my teenaged daughter told me that she hated me and slammed the door in my face. I had spent the evening in tears, and the next day I turned to Amazon.com for some therapy! My daughter and I later patched things up, and I promptly stopped reading the book, but it sure was great to know that it was a common enough occurrence to have a book with that title!!! :)
Rachel
May 03, 2009 Rachel rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Great help for those mommies with upcoming teens-I'll reread it in about 5 years. I really liked how it made me aware of the challenges teens girls face and reminded me to communicate better when we hit that "stage." UG!
Angela Coleman
Jun 04, 2015 Angela Coleman rated it really liked it
Great book! Heartbreaking time for a sensitive mother with a tender heart but this book helped to put things into perspective. Nice to know that I'm not the only one feeling this way and nice to get some ideas to improve the situation.
Melissa
Mar 10, 2016 Melissa rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This is by far and away the best book I've read relating to my teen daughter. It is so spot on it is scary.
Debbie
Jul 04, 2012 Debbie rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
excellent.helpful.
Rachel
Aug 06, 2010 Rachel marked it as to-read  ·  review of another edition
No, my mother and I have no problems. Why do you ask?
Mandy Skala
Mandy Skala rated it it was amazing
Feb 16, 2017
Shelleyrae at Book'd Out
Shelleyrae at Book'd Out rated it really liked it
Jul 29, 2010
Ruth Stern
Ruth Stern rated it liked it
Oct 05, 2012
Natasha
Natasha rated it really liked it
Sep 28, 2008
Leslie
Leslie rated it liked it
Oct 15, 2009
Andreea
Andreea rated it really liked it
May 04, 2016
Jessica
Jessica rated it it was amazing
Mar 18, 2014
Jennifer
Jennifer rated it really liked it
Jan 14, 2012
Janice
Janice rated it really liked it
Jul 16, 2014
Anita
Anita rated it really liked it
May 28, 2009
Jimmie
Jimmie rated it it was amazing
Jul 06, 2014
Gwen Haaland
Gwen Haaland rated it really liked it
Mar 07, 2009
Deb
Deb rated it liked it
Dec 11, 2008
Jenny B
Jenny B rated it really liked it
Jan 06, 2015
Rhona
Rhona rated it really liked it
Jun 21, 2014
Tkutz
Tkutz rated it liked it
May 15, 2015
Kathy Guilbert
Kathy Guilbert rated it liked it
Nov 30, 2010
Kelly
Kelly rated it really liked it
Dec 16, 2012
Ann Marie Hartung
Ann Marie Hartung rated it really liked it
Dec 29, 2013
Cindy
Cindy rated it really liked it
Mar 31, 2017
Lisa Clifford
Lisa Clifford rated it it was amazing
Jun 01, 2014
« previous 1 3 next »
There are no discussion topics on this book yet. Be the first to start one »
121725
Roni Cohen-Sandler, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, nationally recognized author, and educator whose various professional roles enhance her ability to help teens, adults, and families. She has written three parenting books, I’m Not Mad, I Just Hate You!, Trust me—Mom, Everyone Else is Going, and Stressed-out Girls: Helping Them Thrive in the Age of Pressure, and is current writing a book about ...more
More about Roni Cohen-Sandler...

Share This Book