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I Still Have It . . . I Just Can't Remember Where I Put It: Confessions of a Fiftysomething
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I Still Have It . . . I Just Can't Remember Where I Put It: Confessions of a Fiftysomething

3.56  ·  Rating Details ·  192 Ratings  ·  47 Reviews
I bought a new wrinkle cream.
If you use it once a day, you look younger in a month.
Twice a day, you look younger in two weeks.
I ate it.

As the years go by, and the decades begin to pile up, people will do just about anything to reverse the signs of aging: LASIK surgery, industrial-strength hair dye, seven consecutive forty-ninth birthday parties. Rita Rudner is no excepti
Hardcover, 272 pages
Published May 13th 2008 by Crown Archetype (first published 2008)
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Jul 02, 2009 Lain rated it it was amazing
I often pick up books by comedians and are disappointed -- often something is lost in the translation from spoken word to page. But in Rita Rudner's latest book, that is far from the truth. I actually was not familiar with her at all (though I recognized her name) so I was taking a big chance...would I even like her humor at all?

I found that the book was not only hilarious, it was well-written. Funny, touching, honest... like a conversation with a dear friend who just happens to have an extremel
Jul 01, 2009 Karen rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2009-book-club
Casey's MIL loved this book so we decided to make it our book club pick for this month! I am looking forward to it. Thanks Paula for the recommendation!

Ok read this in Vegas and have a new love for Rita! There were so many fun quotes that I found myself reading them out loud to my family. Just a fun light book, chocked full of things I could relate to! I am hoping to be able to remember some of the funny things she said for days when I feel a little down.
Enjoyable and entertaining!
Jun 04, 2017 C rated it really liked it
I laughed, I teared up, I just wish the essays were a little longer because I couldn't get enough of this book.
Roni Blanche
Aug 26, 2013 Roni Blanche rated it it was amazing
Rita Rudner, you deceived me! I have been on a kick lately of reading books about navigating the turbulent waters of hitting mid-life since I'm not doing it so well on my own. I thought this was one of those books from reading the flap blurb. This is SO not one of those books. But I ain't mad, I got nothing but love for you (a fave quote from "Independence Day" I just had to throw in here, in case there are any other "ID" fans out there), because I needed this book way more than more how-to-turn ...more
Deb Carlson
Feb 25, 2017 Deb Carlson rated it it was amazing
Funny, truthful, emotional. A very good read.
Connie N.
Oct 05, 2012 Connie N. rated it it was amazing
Very funny book by comedianne Rita Rudner. This is a series of stories, 4-5 pages each, on various subjects such as her daughter (whom she adopted later in life), her dog, her home, her shopping experiences, etc. Lots of fun and a very quick and enjoyable read.

Favorite quotes (and these are not really jokes but ways of looking at life in a humorous and optimistic way, I think): "...I shall impart to you my secret to happiness. It can be summed up in two words: low expectations. If you expect to
Dec 16, 2014 Chantel rated it liked it
Recommended to Chantel by: Library Display
I enjoyed this book. It was part memoir (not much) and part funny stories about what it is like to get older (mostly). It was a good way to pass the time.

While there are people who actually embrace getting older (although we confess not to know any) most try to deny it. Rita Rudner is no exception. When she reached 50, she couldn't even bear to admit it: "It was more comfortable getting a laugh and telling people I was filthy than having to say the word fffiffffty," she writes. In her hysterical
Feb 28, 2016 Paul rated it liked it
I have always loved Rita Rudner, and I especially liked Naked Under My Clothes. This book started out making me laugh out loud; the middle few essays made me broadly smile; the last few essays made me want to sleep. Rita has a great wit and ability with words, but she ran out of gas toward the end of this book and those essays seem to me to describe ordinary days in her ordinary life.

If she could have continued the pace she had set in the first few essays, I would have loved this, but the ending
Nov 23, 2011 Kathy rated it liked it
Shelves: autobiography
Having seen Rita Rudner on various talk shows and a few comedy specials over the years, I was curious as to what she would write about. It was refreshing to hear a comedian reflect on the oddities of life in a clean an insightful manner that was also funny. If you liked the original beginning to Seinfeld, you will like "I Still Have It, I Just Can't Remember Where I Put It." Rudner shares her thoughts on being a wife, mother, daughter and comedian who has lived in New York City, Los Angeles and ...more
Jun 02, 2008 Cindy rated it really liked it
Recommended to Cindy by: AARP
"If you expect to be excellent at something, you will no doubt be disappointed. If you expect to be terrible, you can thrill yourself by actually being almost competent."
A book of humorous essays Rita wrote about her life, including her childhood, parents, husband, home ownership, her daughter and her dog. She just can't bring herself to say she's fifty, so she says she's "filthy". I can relate and enjoyed the book. Easy to read. Easy to pick up and read a chapter whenever you get a minute.
Jun 28, 2008 MJ rated it liked it
Shelves: non-fiction
(Kathryn--DON'T READ THIS!) Well dang, this wasn't as good as "Naked Beneath My Clothes," but then these are the "Confessions of a fiftysomething," instead of the trials and tribulations of a thirtysomething. Rudner has a permanent show in Las Vegas as a comedian and I wish I could see her! Humourous bits abound to be sure but I was hoping for another "Naked" to read to my sister in Oregon during our upcoming vacation.
Mama K
Jan 11, 2016 Mama K rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
LOVED this book. as a "fiftysomething" myself I found Rudner's life observations not only humorous but also dead on. But the book is not just "funny." It is truthful and poignant. Most entries made me cry, either from laughter or sadness. Life is messy and unpredictable; Rudner showed us the truth of that as well as means to cope with it.
A very fun and easy read, it gives older women something to commiserate with and younger women something to look forward to. She has several humorous insights about aging, parenting, marriage and life in general. While her humor doesn’t translate perfectly well to the written word, it comes pretty darn close. I read it in about a day and was very glad I did.
May 26, 2010 John rated it really liked it
I remember when this book was released - Rita did a spot on NPR's Talk of the Nation w/ Neal Conan. She had me in stitches and I've had this book in the back of me head since then as a "To Read" luckily the other day I was in the right section of the library to find it.

After Reading - I laughed through most of the book, it didn't disappoint.
Cindy K
Aug 15, 2008 Cindy K rated it it was amazing
These essays often make you laugh. Even when you're not laughing out loud, you enjoy the trip.

For years, my husband and I would read the Dave Barry columns to each other. (Okay, I usually did the reading.) It was so much fun to share the essay and made it all the funnier. We're going to read this book out loud too.
Marcia's "Beach Reads" pick for 2008:

If you’ve ever seen Rita live in Las Vegas, or on one of her PBS fund-raisers you’ll know why this will have people nearby in their beach chairs looking at you laughing away as you read this. Seriously hilarious.
Lake County Public Library Indiana
"For a laugh-out-loud experience, read Rudner's take on being 50-something. I found myself reading portions out loud to my husband and then absolutely cracking up ... and he was laughing too ... but not as much as I."
Robert Scott
+A very funny look at the mind of a fifty plus comedienne. There are some real nuggets buried in this book. Funny things, poignant things, friendly Jewish mother advice and general insight to Rita Rudner. By the way, the advice is often something we would all do well to adhere to.
Hot Cup O'Monkey
May 31, 2009 Hot Cup O'Monkey rated it liked it
I really enjoyed this book and highly recommend it. It's a very fun read. Along with the humor, Rudner offers some pretty snappy insights about us middle-agers.
It is a great read for summer, or anytime you need a smile and a good story.

~meh~ It was okay and most of her stories are humorous but it wasn't laugh out loud funny. It was more a chuckle here or there. Although, in all fairness to Rita, I HAD just finished Carol Burnett's latest and you shouldn't really compare the two.

For a light piece of fluff, I'd recommend it.
Apr 09, 2009 Doneen rated it really liked it
Funny (not hysterical, laugh-out-loud) book for people over 50. Those under 50 would probably not enjoy it as much.
Nov 11, 2008 Janna rated it liked it
Funny essays about being over 50.
May 03, 2014 Ed rated it it was amazing
Rita always great fun to see and to read!
Rhonda Ricardo
Oct 29, 2011 Rhonda Ricardo rated it it was amazing
I saw Rita for my birthday, laughed till I cried! Then had our photos taken together... she still had mascara on.. not fair! LOL!! Funny lady, the book rocks!!
May 29, 2010 Mary rated it really liked it
Shelves: non-fiction
Perfect choice for a pick up-put down book that can be read in bits and pieces.
Apr 20, 2009 Deb rated it it was amazing
Talk about HILLARIOUS.....a GOOD READ!!!!!!!
Sep 10, 2008 Robin rated it really liked it
I love Rita Rudner and I was in the mood for this light and humorous look at turning 50 years old.
Nov 15, 2008 Margery rated it really liked it
Admittedly over fifty, Rudner has commentaries on the oddities that women deal with. It was a laugh out loud book that just had to be shared with someone who could also laugh at life.
Nancy H
Aug 22, 2014 Nancy H rated it liked it
Very funny!
Jul 26, 2009 Mom rated it liked it
Rita is a funny woman; most of this is fairly predictable, but there are a few laugh-aloud gems.
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Rita Rudner is an American comedienne, writer and actress.

Rudner and her producer husband, Martin Bergman, wrote the screenplay of the film Peter's Friends, in which she also acted. She is the author of the best-selling I Still Have It; I Just Can't Remember Where I Put It, Naked Beneath My Clothes, and the novels Tickled Pink and Turning The Tables. She has written several screenplays with her hu
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