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Getting Even

4.03  ·  Rating Details  ·  4,445 Ratings  ·  172 Reviews
The classic, with 316,000 copies sold to date.
Hardcover, 151 pages
Published September 12th 1971 by Random House (first published 1966)
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Fahd It's just adding a german or maybe austrian accent to the character's way of speaking - It would just mean "And Mama and I laughed at it."
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Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 3,000)
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Paquita Maria Sanchez
I dedicate this review to my friend David Vicsotka. Here is a man that LOVES engaging in those early-in-the-dating-process, sprawling conversations about art, literature, and film that either A) get you laid, and ideally lead to further discussions concerning the wonders of the creative process coupled with additional sexual encounters or B) lead to awkward conversations, reconsideration of sexual interest, fears that this person is a boorish dumb-ass, fears within that potential dumb-ass that y ...more
Mohammad Ali

نمره ی واقعی: 2.5

نیمه ی اول کتاب پر از تکه های خنده دار و جذاب بود اما در نیمه ی دوم به ندرت چیز خاصی پیدا می شد. اگر کل کتاب مثل نیمه ی اولش بود سه ستاره واقعا حقش بود. همچنان مشکلات در تلفظ اسامی وجود داشت - چیزی که نشان از ویراستاری ضعیف یا نامطلعه

این کتاب رو بیشتر از "عوارض جانبی 1" خنده دار یافتم. یعنی کتاب زیر
عوارض جانبی 1 by Woody Allen

بخش هایی که جذاب تر یافتمشان، "لیست های لباسشویی مترلینگ"، "خاطرات اشمیت"، "بله، اما آیا ماشین بخار قادر است این کار را بکند؟" و "افسانه های حسیدیک" ( به جز آخریش ) بودند
Dec 23, 2010 Mariel rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Hermit the frog
Recommended to Mariel by: Gonzo style
Review #1: The Lists

I would do a list of my favorite Woody Allen films but I've already done so elsewhere on goodreads. I know it happened in 2003 (or maybe it was 2004. I remember the pain if not the exact date) that these asshole Wes Anderson fans made fun of me for having such a long list of favorite Woody Allen films.

Times that Wes Anderson made me look like an idiot:
1. His stupid fans ganged up on me for having a long list of favorite films. Okay, if my favorite filmmaker was Wes Anderson m
May 01, 2009 Punk rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Punk by: Sab
Shelves: short-stories
Humor. These absurd little pieces read like they were written by a computer program that learned to write from Mad Libs. The humor is completely random and utterly dry. The stories aren't laugh-out-loud funny -- they're more likely to surprise an admiring snort out of you -- but they are funny (if sometimes funny-strange), crafted with skill and fearlessness (comedy: the one thing Woody Allen isn't afraid of?).

Some favorites: "The Schmeed Memoirs" - Hitler's barber; "Death Knocks" - Death plays
Rosa Ramôa
Jan 09, 2015 Rosa Ramôa rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Sim, mas a máquina de vapor é capaz de fazer isto?
Podemos fazer uma reflexão filosófica.Podemos ver nisso uma
interpretação do distinto erudito.Boletim da Primavera?
Podemos acabar de vez com a cultura?Será a morte que chama ou é a minha filosofia?
Num dia normal na vida do lendário Conde Drácula que espera pelo anoitecer para não levar com os raios de sol que certamente o matariam. Cai a escuridão.Drácula sai.Tratava de um eclipse.
E ainda:
-As listas de Metterling
-Uma vista de olhos pelo cri
É cómico, absurdo, bastante irónico e sarcástico, apesar de eu ter cabeceado algumas vezes a lê-lo, mas pronto, estava cansada e cheia de sono. Ando a reler Contos do Gin-Tonic e não posso deixar de notar algumas semelhanças. O Woody também tem o seu quê de surreal. Enfim, um clássico incontornável que eu mais tarde ou mais cedo havia de ler. Next.
Aug 10, 2013 Amene rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2013
(وودی آلن)"فرقی نداره توی کدوم گروه باشی ، قطعا توی اون یکی گروه بیشتر خوش می گذره"
وودی از نوابغه بازهم میگم شک نکنین!
این کتاب در فارسی دو تا ترجمه داره یکی کنت دراکولا و داستان های دیگر و ترجمه ی دیگر که ترجمه نگار شاطریان است با نام "حالا بی حساب شدیم"نمی دونم توی ترجمه دیگر هم این مقدار حذفیات و سه نقطه داخل کروشه که نشانه ی سانسور هست وجود دارد یا نه. ولی با تمام این احوالات این هم یکی دیگر از کارهای معرکه ی وودی آلن نابغه ی دوران ما بود خصوصا دو داستان "عقاید فلسفی من"و"اطلاعیه های بهاری"
Jane Stewart
This was ok, but I didn’t smile as much as I hoped. My mind wandered at times.

I like his quirky mind. Woody Allen was ok as narrator of the audiobook.

Narrative mode: mostly 3rd person. Unabridged audiobook length: 2 hrs and 43 mins. Swearing language: Jesus used once or twice. Sexual content: nothing explicit. Book copyright: 1971. Genre: humorous thoughts.
Ivan Damjanović
Priličan sam ljubitelj Allenovih filmova (nekih više, nekih manje*, kao, uostalom, i tekstova iz ove zbirke), a ovo je prvi njegov tiskani uradak kojeg sam se dohvatio. Tradicionalno najuočljivija tekstualna struktura, naslov knjige, veliki je upitnik ovdje. Ne uočavam nikakvu vezu između „Getting Even“ / „Milo za drago“ i dotičnih tekstova. (Ni na netu nisam našao razjašnjenje, ali nije da sam se ubio tražeći). Uglavnom, ova kompilacija objavljena ’71. na mahove vrlo zabavno parodira biografski ...more
Oct 16, 2013 Fernanda rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Hacía tiempo que no releía algo, pero es que realmente necesitaba hacerlo.

Es la clase de libros que sólo alguien acostumbrado a su manera de escribir, de su clase de chistes y su humor snob-intelectual, puede disfrutar. De otro modo puede verse como un montón de palabras pegadas y lanzadas al azar. Sin mencionar que los contenidos culturales que poseen son de alto calibre y sin tener un conocimiento previo, al menos de nombres, puede volverse algo tedioso o confuso, o idiota. Lo que más les gus
Rich Meyer
Feb 13, 2014 Rich Meyer rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: read-in-2014
Woody Allen's three books are some of the funniest stuff I've ever read. I. thoroughly enjoyed them as a child, though I did spend a lot of time in the library looking up some of the more obscure references. This Take the Money and Run- and What's Up Tiger Lily-Allen, not the much more serious leaning director of Manhattan or Interiors.

Getting Even is the first collection and probably the most sublime of the three. Definitely worth a read for any fan of erudite comedy.
Jeff Crompton
Aug 08, 2012 Jeff Crompton rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I picked this one off the shelves a couple of days ago. I've read it a couple of times over the years, but not recently. This time, more than ever, it struck me as brilliant. The humor is a mixture of the intellectual and the ridiculous, and that mixture appeals to me strongly. I particularly enjoyed the final piece, "Mr. Big," which reads like something Mickey Spillane would have written if he had been a philosophy major.
It's a gem of a book.

A collection of hilarious and slightly jarring stories told from different view points including a philosophical detective investigating the death of god, a member of a revolutionary uprising in a south american republic...

Well worth a read.
Sep 02, 2013 claire rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
honestly, i have no idea why such a small book took me so long to read. especially considering how much i enjoyed it. more than likely, i just didn't want it to end.

it's difficult to explain the magic of woody allen's writing. if you've seen a few of his films, then you will at least understand the nature of his humour - dry, witty and at times so sarcastic it almost comes across as sincerity.

this definitely translates into his short stories. it gives him the ability to take the most mundane (a
Nov 16, 2008 Tony rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: essays
Allen, Woody. GETTING EVEN. (1971). ****1/2. This was the first collection of Allen’s thoughts, essays, and phantasmagoria. Most of the pieces were first published in the New Yorker magazine, and are all stand-alone. This is the second time I have worked my way through this book, not realizing that time was passing, and all of a sudden finding I was at the end. On the way I have been entertained and amazed at the variety of Allen’s turgid imagination. Pieces like, “Death Knocks,” and A Little Lo ...more
Leo Robertson
Aug 09, 2015 Leo Robertson rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
The absurd whimsy continues...
Sergiu Pobereznic
I am a huge fan of this man's thoughts, thought process, or musings, so my review is perhaps more than a little biased. In this review I am also including several of Mr. Allen's books because I feel the same about all of them: Without Feather's, Mere Anarchy, and Side Effects.
His style of humour is not for everyone, but it certainly works with me and many of my friends. His seemingly disjointed ideas have affected me positively for decades now. The way he offers an absurd, skewed perspective abo
Lukasz Pruski
Woody Allen's "Side Effects" is one of the funniest books I have ever read (I review it here and, of course, I rate it with five stars) Then I read "Without Feathers", expecting a repeat and getting rather a major disappointment (two and half stars, rounded up, my review is here ). Now I have just finished Woody Allen's "Getting Even", which is even weaker. It contains 17 very short stories (the total of 110 pages), of which I find only three really funny.

In one story, a sexy woman comes to M
A collection of Woody Allen humor pieces; the first of three that I grew up with. Getting Even mostly has the sort of short humor pieces that would run in the New Yorker.

Let's break it down:

Parodies of academic discourse:
The Metterling Lists (lit analysis of a guy's laundry lists)
My Philosophy
Spring Bulletin (class description)
Hassidic Tales (tales and folklore analysis)
Conversations with Helmholtz (interview with great psychoanalyst
The Discovery and Use of the Fake Ink Blot (history of pranks)

Dec 29, 2008 Carl rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
The best of a brilliant trio of Woody Allen's books -- this is humor writing at its best, most literate, most intelligent. When I was looking up the difference between "heuristics" and "hermeneutics" I realized how deep I was. This is probably the funniest volume of anything I have ever read. I can admit that he's got a formula that sometimes falls flat, but pieces like "The Gossage-Vardebedian Papers" and "Viva Vargas!" hit the perfect notes at the perfect pace.
Dec 17, 2014 Israel rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Woody Allen ha sido siempre un provocador y en esta entrega se sale con la suya, la verdad ¿Cuándo no?

La mayoría de los textos contenidos en “Cómo acabar de una vez por todas con la cultura”, fueron publicados en la revista The New Yorker durante su época de colaboración en la misma (finales de los 60, principio de los 70). “Memorias de los años 20” serviría como inspiración o esqueleto para la película “Midnight in Paris”.

En esta ocasión Woody quiere acabar de una vez con todas con la cultura,
Marcelo Dalannays
Getting even (título original) significa, literalmente, “ajustando cuentas”. No obstante, la edición en español ofrece el título “Cómo acabar de una vez por todas con la cultura”, que sin ser el más afortunado, logra informar sobre el contenido: un florilegio donde el autor se burla –con aparente seriedad– de asuntos tan diversos como el crimen organizado, la Filosofía, los folletos promocionales de cursos y talleres, la tradición judía, los revolucionarios centroamericanos o el psicoanálisis, d ...more
This first collection of Woody's New Yorker pieces, published in book form in 1966, raises a humorous fist at God, existentialism, sandwiches, phobias, the gumshoe mystery, etc.

As with most of Woody's writings, the plots are absurd: Dracula stepping out during a total eclipse; a meek shopowner playing gin rummy with Death; an anonymous narrator getting punched in the nose by Hemingway and, later, by Gertrude Stein.

The foundation of what would become vintage Woody is in place, but there's not en
Jan 12, 2016 Karen rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Todos los libros de Woody Allen son el mismo libro de Woody Allen. Perhaps I've had enough.
Oct 21, 2014 Mike rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Glad I read it to round out that early trilogy of his, but in large doses it reads like a modern-day erudite McSweeney's piece interspersed with Mad-Libs. The absurdist/intellectual "balance" it strikes becomes rhythmically tedious; the randomness and non-sequiturs wear out their welcome and devolve into a conspicuously repeated technique. You hope that another tool comes out of the toolbox eventually, and it does, with an excellent back-and-forth over a convoluted over-mail chess game. It's sor ...more
Vinícius Reginatto
Textos humorísticos com elementos de paródia e de humor absurdo. São comuns as justaposições de grandes temas (morte, Deus, sentido da vida, etc.) com elementos banais ("O universo não passa de uma ideia passageira na mente de Deus - o que é um pensamento duplamente desagradável se você tiver acabado de pagar a entrada de sua casa própria"). As temáticas das paródias: psiquiatria, erudição, pretensão artística, gêneros literários e outros. Humor absurdo, humor referencial. Textos engraçadíssimos ...more
Aug 24, 2009 Rozonda rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Una obra maestra. Uno de los libros más divertidos que existen. Un feroz ataque a la cultura de alguien extremadamente culto y con mucha mala uva :D

Me encanta.
Am Jam
Apr 20, 2014 Am Jam rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
"How could you, Kaiser?"

She was fading fast, but I managed to get it in, in time.
"The manifestation of the universe as a complex idea unto itself as opposed to being in or outside the true Being of itself is inherently a conceptual nothingness or Nothingness in relation to any abstract form of existing or to exist or having existed in perpetuity and not subject to laws of physicality or motion or ideas relating to non-matter or the lack of objective Being or subjective otherness."

It was a subtle
Apr 17, 2014 Tecni rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Vuelvo a repetir algo que dije hace bien poco (¿ayer?): últimamente solo caen en mis manos libros con contenidos absurdos y que pretenden hacer gracia; primero fue Un general confederado de Big Sur, después Moscú-Petushkí y ahora este; pero este viene con trampa, porque al autor ya le conocemos todos. La verdad es que el libro me llegó de rebote porque otra persona había decidido que ya no lo quería y a mí me da pena decir que no a un libro. Es comida rápida, de pocas páginas, letra gorda y capí ...more
Jun 27, 2009 Lausº rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Woody Allen es todo un personaje; es un conocido director, actor, escritor y guionista. Este libro es una compilación de sus primeras colaboraciones con el diario The New Yorker.

Nadie se salva, ni la filosofía, ni el arte, ni los revolucionarios, ni el psicoanálisis, incluso la propia muerte... Allen está decidido a enfrentarse a todos, en ocasiones a manera de ensayo, en otras como un dialogo o desde las disparatadas memorias de algún personaje. Debo destacar que para atacar de esta manera se n
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Which story was your favorite? 2 12 Dec 29, 2013 08:44AM  
  • Westward Ha!
  • Pure Drivel
  • Fierce Pajamas: An Anthology of Humor Writing from The New Yorker (Modern Library Paperbacks)
  • The Late Night with David Letterman Book of Top Ten Lists
  • The Lazlo Letters
  • Conversations with Woody Allen: His Films, the Movies, and Moviemaking
  • The Thurber Carnival
  • Memoirs Of A Mangy Lover
  • The Doonesbury Chronicles
  • The Benchley Roundup
  • How to Talk Dirty and Influence People
  • Encyclopedia of Bad Taste
  • Monty Python's Flying Circus: Just The Words (Volumes 1 & 2)
  • Nonsense Novels
Heywood "Woody" Allen (born Allan Stewart Konigsberg) is a three-time Academy Award-winning American film director, writer, actor, jazz musician, comedian and playwright. His large body of work and cerebral film style, mixing satire, wit and humor, have made him one of the most respected and prolific filmmakers in the modern era. Allen writes and directs his movies and has also acted in the majori ...more
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“She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak.” 28 likes
“These modern analysts! They charge so much. In my day, for five marks Freud himself would treat you. For ten marks, he would treat you and press your pants. For fifteen marks, Freud would let you treat him, and that included a choice of any two vegetables. Thirty dollars an hour! Fifty dollars an hour! The Kaiser only got twelve and a quarter for being Kaiser! And he had to walk to work! And the length of treatment! Two years! Five years! If one of us couldn’t cure a patient in six months we would refund his money, take him to any musical revue and he would receive either a mahogany fruit bowl or a set of stainless steel carving knives. I remember you could always tell the patients Jung failed with, as he would give them large stuffed pandas.” 12 likes
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