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Es wird mir fehlen, das Leben.
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Es wird mir fehlen, das Leben.

4.18 of 5 stars 4.18  ·  rating details  ·  296 ratings  ·  34 reviews
"Chemo was vile," writes editor and freelance writer Ruth Picardie in an e-mail. "Imagine four days of the worst hangover combined with the worst flu, where you can hardly move, feel poisoned, and are half-asleep but not pleasantly out of it all the time." Before I Say Goodbye is a collection of columns and e-mails from Picardie in her last year before dying of breast canc ...more
Taschenbuch, 175 pages
Published August 1st 2000 by Rowohlt Tb. (first published 1998)
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I have honestly never cried so much, I had tears pouring down my face for most of this book. It's made me appreciate how short life is & to make the most of what I have. I can't imagine dying & leaving my babies. The final few pages written by her husband after her death really bring the reality of how undignified it is to die from cancer.

E-mails, articles & letters written by & to, Ruth Picardie, a journalist for the Observer, who finds she has terminal breast cancer at aged 32,
Ruth's story is not one of bemoaning her predicament. It is the story of her life before and after her horrendous diagnosis; life with her husband and her children, the love of her job, the silliness that is shared between her and her friends, and her crass view of cancer...its intrusion into her life.

Her lump, when first detected by Ruth herself, was determined by her doctors as being a "fibroadenoma", a non-cancerous lump of the breast. Pacified by the diagnosis, Ruth and her husband Matt wipe
A very moving account of one woman dealing with her cancer diagnosis and terrible prognosis. The book take the form of e-mails Ruth Picardie sent her best freinds in the year between her diagnosis and death, and the five articles she wrote for a British newspaper.

In the little pockets of her life visible through her correspondance with loved ones the magnitude of the loss her friends and family will face upon her death is heart breakingly obvious. It is not the grand gestures one misses when som
"Almost unbearable intensity" says the cover. That's about right. I never quite got over my awkwardness with reading other people's private correspondence but she laid herself so bare in her column that the voyeuristic aspect was eventually diluted.

What shines through so much in this book about, essentially, dying, is life and her determination to hang on to it. I wept openly at her letters to her children. The postscript by her husband was amazing too - what courage to be able to admit the real
Ruth Picardie was a journalist who was diagnosed with breast cancer in her early thirties, and then all kinds of secondary cancers, in her bones, her lungs, her liver, her brain, and learnt she was going to die. She wrote a column about it in The Observer - although she didn't have time to write many articles, due to the quick progression of the illness - so this book combines her articles with some of her email correspondence with various of her friends, and some of the letters readers wrote in ...more
Die Journalistin Ruth Picardie fällt aus alle Wolken als bei ihr Brustkrebs diagnostiziert wird. Ihre Krankheit schreitet rapide schnell voran. Schon bald hat sie nicht mehr die Kraft, ihr normales Leben fortzuführen und ihre vielen Freunde zu treffen. Stattdessen behilft sie sich mit E-Mails, um mit der Außenwelt noch einigermaßen in Kontakt zu bleiben.
Einige von diesen E-Mails sind in diesem Buch abgedruckt und veranschaulichen die letzten Monate von Ruth. Leider erlebt Ruth den ersten Jahres
Lisa Reiter
This is a really good book but a very difficult read if you do have metastasised cancer. So I recommend it to those who don't but not if you do. There's no hope in it, but an incredibly honest exploration of a terrible personal nightmare.
Absolutely wonderful! So moving. I had just lost my husband to cancer, and could not "right" myself or adjust to my new position in society Ms. Picardie gave me hope, even though she was no longer among us.
wow! found this to be truly insightful and truthful, something i have carried with during my practice as a healthcare worker! moving, honest, upsetting! great , profound read
Aug 17, 2012 Tima rated it 4 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: women, people who have lost someone to cancer
This book was heart-breaking. Not in the outright sad way that you would expect. The pain sneaked up on you like a sunburn. One minute your laughing - truly feeling the warmth Ruth Picardie has for her family and life, the next minute you feel the sting of a tear burning in your eyes.

It's unlike any memoir I've read. In that, it is not written to you, the reader. It is a series of notes, letters, email and various correspondence between Ruth Picardie and her family/friends during her fatal batt
Tracey Sinclair
I wept like a baby (in public!) when I read this. Heartbreaking.
As I am on a biog tip at the moment this was one I'd meant to read for ages. Everything you expect reallly... sad, funny, tragic, optimistic all rolled into one.

Her correspondence and 'inner most' thoughts are both funny, breathtaking and uncomprehensibly sad. The post script is one of the best bits, as her husband talks candidly about what it's like to lose somebody in the 'prime' of their life - how terminal illnesses takes over and robs you of the person you love, etc.

Highly recommended, if y
Heartbreaking, and so well written.
Elizabeth Simons
Sometimes the most meaningful books are not well organized or edited. This is raw, straight from the heart. It will stay with me a long time. Ruth Picardie was as honest as it is possible to be about her coming death. Reading between the lines, though you could see an absence of her feelings for her husband. Then in his afterword, he says that the cancer came between them and he could not reach her. The timing of her illness coming so soon after the birth of twins must have been partly the cause ...more
China Flanigan
This is an amazing book and as an American living in London, at the time of reading, it was a real life argument against Nationalized healthcare. What it is really about, is a young woman coming to grips with her imminent death. This book had a huge impact on me, even now, 13 years after I read it.
This book made me change my mind about my wish at death for it to happen in my sleep. This book made me rethink this. I now think that part of living is dying and to be aware would enhance living and dying.

Anyway, this is not a morbid book.
Arunita Sen
I was in tears when I was on the last page of this book. A brilliant read. After words from her husband, Matt are so well written too. This would make you realise what they face in a hard-core-bitter way! Must read!
Fascinating & moving idea - a journalist dying of cancer writes letters to her children to be opened over the years, coinciding with important moments she would have shared with them had she lived.
Funny and sad at the same time. The story of a women diagnosed with ALS and her journeys with her family after she finds out about her illness. Makes you appreciate the moments you have.
Not exactly uplifting, but the author writes truthfully about her impending death. We are watching "The Big C," right now, so I thought this would be a good time to pick up this book.
Sad yet funny, this book is in part a collection of columns wriiten by the author. It's also a completion of a life, which is the most tragic thing about the story.
I had to read this book for class, but I loved it! It's emails and letters that the author sent to friends the year before she died of cancer.
I read this a litttle while ago through tears. It was so sad, but the spirit of Ruth shone through. Wish I could say more.
The newspaper columns and emails of a journalist dying with cancer. Beautiful, sad and funny at the same time.
Un témoignage d'une émotion incroyable. C'est un livre m'a marqué pendant des mois et auquel je repense souvent.
Wonderfully touching account of the authors fight with cancer.
Also very funny in parts too
I found this to be a very difficult, sad read. I think I would have liked Ruth Picardie.
A reverent read...full of sadness and beauty.
Elisse Breugelmans
Made me laugh and cry. Very moving.
Alison Gray
A little difficult to read
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