Friendkeeping: A Field Guide to the People You Love, Hate, and Can't Live Without
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Friendkeeping: A Field Guide to the People You Love, Hate, and Can't Live Without

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3.18 of 5 stars 3.18  ·  rating details  ·  552 ratings  ·  149 reviews
From the beloved and bestselling memoirist comes a funny and affecting look at making the most of our friendships in an age of isolation.
With her inimitable wit and disarming warmth, Julie Klam shares with us her experiences, advice, and insight in "Friendkeeping," a candid, hilarious look at some of the most meaningful and enjoyable relationships in our lives: our friend...more
ebook, 224 pages
Published October 1st 2012 by Riverhead Books (first published April 10th 2012)
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Jaclyn Day
I’ve yet to find a book that really gets its hands around the complexity of adult friendship, but Friendkeeping is a valiant effort. (It’s still better than the frustrating MWF Seeking BFF.) Klam goes the anecdotal route, discussing various aspects of friendship in a funny, memoir-ish way that doesn’t tie things up neatly into a bon mot, self-help tone at the end of each chapter. That’s fine—but the book seems to be marketed differently. The tagline for example: A Field Guide to the People You L...more
Ciara
i don't know. it was okay? a lot of the less positive review on goodreads say that it was fluffy & lacked substance. can't say i disagree! i was kind of relieved by that, because i have so little time or brainpower for reading thick, heavy books these days (i've been working on andrew solomon's "far from the tree" for literally months). so it was kind of pleasant to just tear through a book in a few hours, like i used to before i had a baby. but i just read it a couple of days ago & i al...more
David
potentially interesting subject but a boring book. "one of the funniest writers I know" per the Dayton Daily News blurb, but I guess my taste differs. I didn't dislike her, and I could tell there were phrases or sentences meant in a lighthearted or facetious manner, but I can't say that I laughed even once.

As to the "field guide" part, it's modest. Some people are good at keeping up with long-distance friends, and some are not. The author's mom was closest to her sibs, but the author is not clos...more
Holly
Did I, despite often (constant?) moaning about not having enough time to read, really finish THIS? Yes - so you don't have to! A slapped-together collection of random anecdotes and observations about friendship, especially the author's friends. Nothing particularly deep; nothing particularly interesting, for that matter. The author is incredibly inconsistent; she contradicts herself multiple times. And soo smirky/punny; someone needs to tell her to dial down the "humor." A little of this goes a...more
Rachel Hall
"You come into this world alone and you die alone, but there's a really long stretch in the middle that can be extraordinarily meaningful and even fun with the right people. And when it's not fun, they'll be with you, too." Friendships <3
Shalyn
When I bought this book at the airport gift shop so I'd have something to read on the plane for a few hours, I thought it would be more of a discussion on the psychology of human relationships -- not necessarily a scholarly discussion, but at least something that would rise to the level of pop-psychology or something that could have been published in Psychology Today magazine at least. It wasn't. The author rambles on for 200+ pages about her friends, how great they are, how they haven't always...more
Michele Harrod
This is a very cute read. I have enjoyed it - Julie Klam has a razor sharp wit, and a self-honesty I found very refreshing. I'd thoroughly enjoy being her friend, because she has enough of them that I wouldn't fear being overly needed. I don't cope well with being needed. I love her confession that she is at the lousy end of the "keeping in touch" scales, famed for making dinner dates, and then cancelling them. And when people move out of town, she considers that a form of abandonment and betray...more
Stefanie
This was a fairly light read, which is about all I can manage at this particular moment in my life, but I can't say that I was impressed. The author's tongue in cheek sarcasm and efforts to poke fun at herself fell flat, and instead of making me laugh, I closed the book feeling like she was rather shallow and perhaps a little neurotic. She goes from one vignette to another, when what I'd have preferred was a deeper exploration of friendship. I didn't really feel like knew anything about anyone i...more
Carley
*I won this in a Goodreads First Reads Contest*

There are all types of friends; childhood friends, school yard friends, friends that you've had forever, the friends that got away and the friends that drain every last ounce of life from you. Julie Klam covers it all. This is a step by step guide how to navigate, keep and let go of the people that come into your life forever, for a season and/or for a moment.

Using first hand accounts, life stories and hilarious analogies such as the remora's, Frie...more
Ellen
I received this book in a Goodreads First-Reads giveaway. Thanks so much...I enjoyed the book! Julie Klam has a great sense of humour; it was fun, and easy to read. There were lots of great observations and insights about female friendships that I think most women can relate to, but I think I was looking for more. What about the loss of a friend? How to cope? When a friend ends your friendship with no explanation, how do you deal with that? How do women cope with the death of a life-long friend?...more
Rekha
I so thought this book would be right up my alley, because it touches on so many things that I spend a lot of time thinking about, caring about, trying to be better at: maintaining friendships as a central core of one's life, how to be a good friend, blah blah. Plus, it's a humor book, and me and humor? ARE LIKE THIS. But ultimately it was too meandering for me. Like, she has a chapter about maintaining friendships when you're in a different life stage than your pals (they have babies and you do...more
Erin
It's not really an advice book as I was hoping. It's more of a collection author's personal relationships with her friends. Some of the stories are repeated, which I thought was a bit odd for such a small book. Overall, as a woman, I can still relate and gather advice through her personal anecdotes. It definitely made me reflect on a few of my friendships, and made me feel better about one in particular that has really changed. The book made me realize that it's often no one's "fault" when frien...more
Josephine
I always feel bad when I have to review a book I don't have much good to say about... Although the tone is humorous, I didn't enjoy it. The front cover advertise the book as being "A field guide to the people you love, hate, and can't live without". In fact, it is filled with shallow generalizations on friendship and anecdotical examples from the author's personnal life. Maybe my expectations were too high but I found "Friendkeeping" to be a really boring read. I won this galley through FirstRea...more
Stacy
In a nutshell what I learned from Friendkeeping: A Field Guide to the People You Love, Hate, and Can't Live Without by Julie Klam is something I already know - I sort of suck at being friends with people; it's so much work. Seriously though, I don't know if there was really anything in here that wasn't obvious and it's really more of the author relating stories about her own friendships. It did force me think a bit more about the friends I do have and how to work them into my life.
Allie
This was a light, amusing read. It's definitely more of a memoir than a "field guide," but the author's tales about her friendships were entertaining, and there were parts I could relate to - and others I couldn't at all (like friends gossiping about celebrities.) Her little asides about her own insecurities were funny. This would make great airplane or beach reading. There's no need to read the chapters in order, so it's perfect for picking up and putting down on a whim.
Melissa Klug
I'm not a dog person, at all, yet I have read two dog books by Julie Klam because I love her humorous writing style so, so much. Now she has a book on friends--wait! I have friends! I love friends! I can read a Julie Klam book and relate to it! This book made me think about all of my own friendships, the new ones and the old ones, the ones forged by real life connections or online connections, and reminded me to be grateful for them. Love!
Char
I loved, loved, loved this book. Could not put it down. Almost missed my book club discussion because it was tempting to stay home to finish it. Some of the reviews were negative, but I am so glad I disregarded them. Before finishing the book, I phoned a friend I hadn't seen or talked to in over 10 years. We picked up righT where we had left off and it was a treat for both of us. It was also her birthday so the timing was perfect.
Melissa Lee-tammeus
Okay, it's cute. That's about it. Little snippets from the life of a NYer that lives what most of us would believe to be the jet set life. She knows people who know Madonna. That sort of thing. Sex in the City meets How to Make Friends. I learned really nothing from this book, but it was a good distraction for a few hours. Moral of the story? Friends are awesome - find a few.
Kaela
I loved this book & read it in about 3 sittings. It's just what I wanted it to be. A celebration and reminder of why friends matter & how to celebrate mine in big and small ways. And the surprising bit is the humor. Klam is funny. And her name is Klam which I delight in - in my dirty mind way. So I'm gonna go get in touch w. my friends now while the moment is ripe.
Monica
How lucky is Julie to get a bunch of stories about friends published and make some money from it? This book really didn't do much for me as far as being a field guide. I don't think she even wrote about people she hates or couldn't live without. Maybe one friend. I was hoping it would be more insightful.
Rhonda
loved this book.Julie had me laughing out loud and relating to her neurotic behavior while appreciating her love for her friends even though she would rather call or email then actually get together.really a beautiful book about women and the importance of friendship in our lives
Lynde
I loved this little gem! Julie Klam can be my friend any day. Funny, heartwarming, & truthful. Made me feel good about my own friendships past & present. I received this book free from Goodreads, but this review has no bearing on that--I really enjoyed it!
speciallyi
Anectodal, light and fun. Good if you were never aware of your own behaviour in friendships. For me, it serves as a reminder and confirmation of some things I do and reassurance that it's okay not to be perfect.
Amy
Short, fun book. Funny, insightful and relatable. This book makes you think about those special friendships throughout your life, and what a treasure they are.
Jeanette Benzie
I love all my friends even more after this book. I feel honored to call Julie a friend, everyone should read this and learn all you need to know about friendships.
Cathy
Through a collection of light-hearted stories, Klam paints a vignette of the friendships in her life. These little case studies are meant to elucidate the universal ups and downs of friendship. She succeeded in this with me, since I could relate her stylized friends to people I share my life with, and the myriad friendship situations she navigated occur in real life.

Unlike many other reviewers, I was indeed touched by Klam's "inimitable wit and disarming warmth." There were parts where I laughed...more
Amy
I think I liked this one best out of Klam's books, because she was writing about a great subject. She is funny, in her own self-deprecating way.
Lindsay Allen
This author's writing reminded me of a Real Housewife. Jill Zarin, from NY 'wives to be more exact. Her tag line at one point was something like "I run with a FABULOUS circle of friends". Ridiculous. I'm sure women like this are loyal to someone. If you have to describe each friendship you've ever had however, and how this makes you sound like such a great person that you can keep these friends, it's just weird. And I don't want to read about it. I already watch the Real Housewives on TV. I don'...more
Maureen Flatley
Another wonderful, funny, touching book from Julie Klam. I hope she's writing another one!
Ldrhc
Jan 27, 2013 Ldrhc marked it as unable-to-finish  ·  review of another edition
I just won this book in a book give-away. Can't wait to receive it and read it.
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Julie Klam grew up in Bedford, NY. She has been a freelance writer since 1991, writing for such publications as “O, The Oprah Magazine,” “Rolling Stone,” “Harper’s Bazaar,” “Glamour,” and “The New York Times Magazine”.
A graduate of NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts, she was a writer for VH1’s Pop-Up Video, where she earned an Emmy nomination for Special Class Writing.
A New York Times Bestseller, she...more
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“You come into this world alone and die alone, but there's a really long stretch in the middle that can be extraordinarily meaningful and even fun with the right people. And when it's not fun, they'll be with you, too.” 0 likes
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