The night before a big meeting, Jack Eisley is sitting in an airport bar in Philadelphia, chatting up a pretty young blonde. Sure, Jack has a wife...
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reviews
Feb 06, 2012
Steve
rated it: 
Duane Swierczynski has quite an imagination. His books are unusual, and unpredictable. Such was the case with “The Blonde” (2007).
I previously read two of his other books, “The Wheelman” from 2006 and “Severance Package” from 2008.” “The Blonde” would be in the same league as “Severance Package,” both of them dealing an ordinary guy caught up in the machinations of a super-secret government agency which specializes in assassinations. But whereas “Severance Package” takes place in one b More...
I previously read two of his other books, “The Wheelman” from 2006 and “Severance Package” from 2008.” “The Blonde” would be in the same league as “Severance Package,” both of them dealing an ordinary guy caught up in the machinations of a super-secret government agency which specializes in assassinations. But whereas “Severance Package” takes place in one b More...
Nov 23, 2011
Kelly
rated it: 
Jack is on his way to Philadelphia to meet his wife's divorce attorney, so he was pretty sure that his life couldn't get much worse. Turns out, it can. He meets a blonde at the airport bar and they're chatting. He thinks it's going pretty well until she tells him that she poisoned him. He's like, "Yeah, sure, hahaha," but turns out she really did. So now he has to find her again. And when he does, the story she tells him? Well, it gets even weirder from there.
This is More...
This is More...
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Mar 10, 2011
Amanda
rated it:
The Blonde is a quick read, a fast-paced, farcical, nutty and ultimately irreverent tale written in the crime noir style of pulp fiction. You won't come away from the story hoping for a sequel to experience these characters again, but you'll enjoy the madcap thrill ride while it lasts. The comedic story at times requires a good dose of "suspension of disbelief" although it does have one of the best opening lines I've ever read that is sure to hook readers: "I poisoned your drink."
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Dec 29, 2010
Duane Swierczynski seems to have carved out his own niche of crime stories with a twist. If Expiration Date is time-travel noir, The Blonde is femme fatale sci-fi. Not hardcore sci-fi, mind you. More the Michael Crichton kind, since this story revolves around self-replicating nanobot parasites that live in the blood and can be tracked by satellites. They are also able to somehow sense proximity to other people, which is why the title character has to stay within 10 feet of someone else, otherwis
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Jun 01, 2010
Debbi
rated it:
Following on the heels of THE WHEELMAN, Duane Swierczynski spins the literary equivalent of cotton candy, if such a confection were made with acid. THE BLONDE is a non-stop thrill ride. The kind of reading that goes down so easy the reader will gobble page after page. A story so wild and over-the-top, it feels like a guilty pleasure.
From the opening line – "I poisoned your drink" – the reader hangs on every word. The line is spoken by the titular woman to Jack Eisley, a man More...
From the opening line – "I poisoned your drink" – the reader hangs on every word. The line is spoken by the titular woman to Jack Eisley, a man More...
Dec 31, 2010
Johnny
rated it:
Big, silly fun. An over-the-top premise told within an over-the-top storyline. THE BLONDE is a quick read, but consciously skims along the surface.
While a small effort is made to create more of depth to the characters, the action moves so quickly that the reader can only latch onto the broad strokes. It feels conscious, but limits the connection to any of the characters.
Where the story really dropped the ball for me (and for the most part I went along with it) is that it n More...
While a small effort is made to create more of depth to the characters, the action moves so quickly that the reader can only latch onto the broad strokes. It feels conscious, but limits the connection to any of the characters.
Where the story really dropped the ball for me (and for the most part I went along with it) is that it n More...
Apr 27, 2009
Kevin
rated it: 
I was looking for a quick read to cleanse my palette from the non-fiction, career-building reading binge, and I suppose I found it in The Blonde, Duane Swierczynski's Philadelphia-based paranoia thriller.
Unfortunately, the central premise of Proximity, interesting idea that it is, failed to sustain my interest even to the end of this brief book. Perhaps it could have been stronger if the author had resisted the urge to split the titular blonde and the journalist-protagonist so quickl More...
Unfortunately, the central premise of Proximity, interesting idea that it is, failed to sustain my interest even to the end of this brief book. Perhaps it could have been stronger if the author had resisted the urge to split the titular blonde and the journalist-protagonist so quickl More...
May 20, 2010
Ethan
rated it:
Fast-paced, gritty noir fiction kind of stuff. The science-fiction theme was surprising and pretty cool, at first, but there were a few things that didn't make much sense, and the book ended without tying up the loose end of an impending armageddon from medical technology gone awry. I mean, you'd think someone would have figured out all the murders by now, or gotten an idea about the bots, or whatever. The logic of how the bots worked didn't seem completely consistent. Just a bit strange.
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Sep 29, 2009
Craig
rated it:
"The NEW Year of Mystery" continues!... After being blown away by Swierczynski's prior effort "The Wheelman", I had very high hopes for "The Blonde"... It certainly wasn't bad, and had many of the same elements that made "The Wheelman" so much fun - fast pace, lots of twists and turns, outlandish characters. But what worked so well in "The Wheelman" felt somewhat forced and contrived in "The Blonde", and I think it's because the central
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Jun 19, 2010
Adam
rated it:
Duane Swierczynski in The Blonde comes up with mean slice of revved-up modern Hitchcock thriller. An innocent man gets pulled into situations way beyond his understanding and mayhem and pitch black comedy ensues (with a blonde along for the ride of course). Amoral characters and run amuck nanotechnology keep the action lean and breathless. Pop references like to Jean Patrick Manchette and D.O.A.(the original not the remake) add to the fun . Manchette is a good reference point as he wrote similar
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Mar 10, 2008
Christy
rated it: 
This reminded me somewhat of the Julie Kenner Play.Win.Survive trilogy (except not as good!)...
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May 18, 2010
Will
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The Blonde is either a prequel or a sequel to Severance Package, it is never quite clear on the time line, however the novels do seem to interact.
Like Severance Package, this novel opens fast and holds the pace of blood, action, and cloak & dagger intrigue.
Imagine sitting in an airport bar when a very attractive blonde looks over and whispers "I just put poison in your drink". Kind of a lousy way to end a business trip eh?
Throw in a dose of a merc More...
Like Severance Package, this novel opens fast and holds the pace of blood, action, and cloak & dagger intrigue.
Imagine sitting in an airport bar when a very attractive blonde looks over and whispers "I just put poison in your drink". Kind of a lousy way to end a business trip eh?
Throw in a dose of a merc More...
Sep 11, 2011
Eric_W
rated it:
Fasten your seatbelts and prepare for a wild ride of Homeland Security assassins, clean-up men, a beautiful blonde who has to be within ten feet of someone or horrible death ensues, an evil man called “The Operator” (what else), nanotechnology creatures called “Mary Kates,” a Sybian Club, and a normal guy who gets caught in something way over his head.
Fun. Perfect for a cross-country plane ride or waiting for the doctor to be finished with the cute drug salesperson (ever notice how th More...
Fun. Perfect for a cross-country plane ride or waiting for the doctor to be finished with the cute drug salesperson (ever notice how th More...
Jan 22, 2011
Lennet
rated it:
Good, very good. I liked the over all theme. Well this girl/woman (whatever) she legit can't be alone, not because shes afraid but because it she is she'll die, like literally die! Her cells or something can sensor it, so she can't be more than a foot away from another human being, this man whos getting a devorce has the bad luck of running into her. They kiss at one point!! and well he gets the "disease" as well and so they both can't be away from people. ERR!!! i can't say anymore. b
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May 09, 2010
Nicole
rated it: 
This book so far is a cheesy crime? mystery? novel. I'm going to finish it because I want to know what happens but so far I'm not impressed. Why do I insist on trying out genre fiction when I know I often don't like it.
Incredibly crazy original concept. I emphasize crazy more than original. If you can overlook the many typos, and grammar mistakes, not to mention the few story inconsistencies, then this is an EASY dramatic read.
Don't recommend it though. Not that good. Althoug More...
Incredibly crazy original concept. I emphasize crazy more than original. If you can overlook the many typos, and grammar mistakes, not to mention the few story inconsistencies, then this is an EASY dramatic read.
Don't recommend it though. Not that good. Althoug More...
May 22, 2010
Boden
rated it:
I'm starting to think that nobody knows how to get pages turning in a crime novel quite like Duane Swierczynski.
Need a hook? Need a ticking clock? Need a conflict?
Page one,line one, "I poisoned your drink."
This is surely enough to get a story moving, but while most writers would allow that premise to coast, Swierczynski just uses it as a jump start before flooring it. Sequence by sequence, scene by scene, the conflicts get boosted, jacked, and blasted. More...
Need a hook? Need a ticking clock? Need a conflict?
Page one,line one, "I poisoned your drink."
This is surely enough to get a story moving, but while most writers would allow that premise to coast, Swierczynski just uses it as a jump start before flooring it. Sequence by sequence, scene by scene, the conflicts get boosted, jacked, and blasted. More...
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Nov 23, 2011
Jonathan
rated it:
[re-posted from my old blog]
Woo wee, that was a fun, fast, furious ride! I just finished up "The Blonde" by Duane Swierczynski, after just starting it a couple of days ago. Yeah, it is short but it is also in that "nearly impossible to put down" category. You just have to see what happens next. I think I'll have to pick up his debut novel, The Wheelman. I mean, you have to have high hopes for a mystery thriller that starts out:
"I poisoned y More...
Woo wee, that was a fun, fast, furious ride! I just finished up "The Blonde" by Duane Swierczynski, after just starting it a couple of days ago. Yeah, it is short but it is also in that "nearly impossible to put down" category. You just have to see what happens next. I think I'll have to pick up his debut novel, The Wheelman. I mean, you have to have high hopes for a mystery thriller that starts out:
"I poisoned y More...
Aug 25, 2008
Gary
rated it:
Warning: Do Not Open This Book...
...unless you've no plans for the rest of the day.
Trust me - this is about as good as modern pulp crime fiction gets - a frantic, dark, and cynical half day romp through a Philadelphia night that combines the lean, no nonsense tough guy style of the classic masters of crime with a neat pop science fiction twist. This is the bizarre offspring of Raymond Chandler, were he writing for the iPod generation, and Michael Crichton, without the te More...
...unless you've no plans for the rest of the day.
Trust me - this is about as good as modern pulp crime fiction gets - a frantic, dark, and cynical half day romp through a Philadelphia night that combines the lean, no nonsense tough guy style of the classic masters of crime with a neat pop science fiction twist. This is the bizarre offspring of Raymond Chandler, were he writing for the iPod generation, and Michael Crichton, without the te More...
Mar 28, 2008
Jamal
rated it:
The Blonde, an apparent attempt to transcend the tropes of the hard-boiled crime novel by indulging in the clichés of the genre is at the same time so bold it borders on satire and too timid to be satirical.
The femme fatale's motivations were only somewhat non-standard because of the existence of nano-bots, otherwise she's just another lusty sex kitten using her body to further her aims. I.e. just another femme fatale. The list of familiar crime elements is extensive, including jur More...
The femme fatale's motivations were only somewhat non-standard because of the existence of nano-bots, otherwise she's just another lusty sex kitten using her body to further her aims. I.e. just another femme fatale. The list of familiar crime elements is extensive, including jur More...
Oct 17, 2007
Alex
rated it:
This book is the second by a young up & coming (formerly)crime novelist. Like a great many second novels this one falls into the "sophmore slump" trap. The Blonde has a couple of very compelling characters which keep it from being a total pile of crap- but mostly it suffers from one the dumbest sci-fi premises ever concocted. And this is from a reader who loves sci-fi.
Remember in "Speed" how the bus would blow if it went slower than 55? Well - in this book the nanobot More...
Remember in "Speed" how the bus would blow if it went slower than 55? Well - in this book the nanobot More...
Apr 14, 2009
Aleta
rated it:
I read "Severence Package" from this author and really enjoyed it. So I thought I would give this one a shot. The story is interesting but like "Severence Package" you're kinda like 'isn't it over yet?' It reminded me of a "Die Hard" movie where you keep thinking he's got to be dead or he can't get back up but sure enough, here he comes with bloody feet! I'm going to read the rest of his books just because Duane has proved that he has a great imagination and does pr
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Aug 09, 2010
Jason
rated it:
If you are going on a trip that has a 4+ hour flight then you should definitely pick this book up! I started at 10pm just to get some reading in before I went to bed and I didn't stop reading until I had finished it at 2am. The action took off on page 1 line 1 and it never let up. So if your a fan of action\thriller plot lines then this is the one for you. What would you do to keep someone/anyone always 10 feet away from you and if they were to leave that area your head would explode?
Mar 25, 2010
galleycat
rated it:
Two-hundred-fifteen rapid-fire pages of non-stop, action-packed storytelling. Yeah, OK, over the top at times, but in a good way ... like one of those thrills-a-minute, out-of-the-fire-into-the-frying-pan scenes in an Indiana Jones movie ... and even if that's not your thing, man oh man, you certainly can't say it's not at least endlessly entertaining, with a big fat capital 'E.'
Nice twisty ending with an unexpected, smile-inducing poignant moment.
This is my first Swiercz More...
Nice twisty ending with an unexpected, smile-inducing poignant moment.
This is my first Swiercz More...
Jul 16, 2008
Christopher
rated it:
I don't know if I'm too snooty or something, but I rarely venture into the mystery/thriller section of my local bookstore. This was put into my hands by a guy at the bookstore, whose taste I'm not entirely sure I trust, but I figured I could give it a whirl.
And damn, but he was right. This book starts out mid-step and then breaks into a full-out run. It's completely ridiculous and insane and funny and thrilling. It's not 'important' or 'weighty' and there's no subtext because the te More...
And damn, but he was right. This book starts out mid-step and then breaks into a full-out run. It's completely ridiculous and insane and funny and thrilling. It's not 'important' or 'weighty' and there's no subtext because the te More...
Jun 13, 2011
Skott
rated it:
"I poisoned your drink."
Swiercynski's The Wheelman was a fast-paced straight crime novel, but The Blonde goes all SFNal on us. The Blonde has been infected with fatal, contagious nanotech that kills everyone she shares bodily fluids with. The premise is crazy for a straight thriller, but the pace is even crazier; the Reacher novels are Proust by comparison with the pace of Swierczynski's books. Violent and clever. Loved it.
Swiercynski's The Wheelman was a fast-paced straight crime novel, but The Blonde goes all SFNal on us. The Blonde has been infected with fatal, contagious nanotech that kills everyone she shares bodily fluids with. The premise is crazy for a straight thriller, but the pace is even crazier; the Reacher novels are Proust by comparison with the pace of Swierczynski's books. Violent and clever. Loved it.
Aug 21, 2011
Ray
rated it:
This one comes under the heading of "guilty pleasures" or "beach reads". I went through it in a afternoon and felt fairly satisfied by its quirky premise (opening line "I poisoned your drink.", noir-like style, and not-stop action. Pretty much the type of thing you don't mind hanging out with at the bar for an afternoon, but derinitely don't want to take home to Mother.
Dec 19, 2010
Talli
rated it:
The blurb detailing how a mysterious blonde woman informs a man that she's poisoned him and he will die if she doesn't do exactly what she says? That got me right there. Not only because it resembled a premise idea I'd had myself, but simply because that's the kind of mystery I can get in to.
Overall, the story was interesting, funny, and a good read. Enjoyed it very much.
Overall, the story was interesting, funny, and a good read. Enjoyed it very much.
Aug 05, 2011
Larry
rated it:
Awesome book! This was like reading a book on speed. I'd never read anything by DS before but now I definitely will need to again. Terrific concept, great characters and while the storyline required significant abandonment of reality, it grabbed me from the first page and held me through the last, even through the extra "sequel short story" at the end of the copy I bought. This could be a Tarantino movie. Suspend your belief at the door and pick this up!
May 07, 2009
Jason
rated it:
"High-octane" would be a good word to describe this book. Very fast-paced from the very start. The ending wasn't necessarily disappointing, but it certainly didn't end the way I would have written it. Then again, he's the paid professional and I'm not! A very fun read -- I'm now reading his next book, Severence Package and enjoying it so far.
Sep 20, 2011
Monica
rated it:
His The Wheelman was one of the best books of 1995. This one is equally good - weird, noir, hilarious. Boy meets girl. Girl kidnaps boy. Boy loses girl. Boy is pursued by government assassin with severed head in a duffel bag. Evil scientist has implanted girl with self-replicating lethal nanomachines. You get the idea.
