Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It
Enlarge cover
Rate this book
Clear rating

Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It

3.77 of 5 stars 3.77  ·  rating details  ·  4,845 ratings  ·  333 reviews
Have you ever wished your partner came with an instruction booklet? This international bestseller is the answer to all the things you've ever wondered about the opposite sex.

For their controversial new book on the differences between the way men and women think and communicate, Barbara and Allan Pease spent three years traveling around the world, collecting the dramatic fi...more
Paperback, 272 pages
Published June 19th 2001 by Harmony (first published January 1st 1999)
more details... edit details

Friend Reviews

To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up.

Reader Q&A

To ask other readers questions about Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps, please sign up.

Be the first to ask a question about Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps

Next Time Lucky by Siggy BuckleyWhy Men Love Bitches by Sherry ArgovMen Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus by John  GrayHe's Just Not That Into You by Greg BehrendtFrom Hurt to Happiness by Mike Van
Best Relationship Non-Fiction
13th out of 143 books — 286 voters
North and South by Elizabeth GaskellLittle Men / Little Women Boxed Set by Louisa May AlcottMoll Flanders by Daniel DefoeWar and Peace by Leo TolstoyThe Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien
Polar Opposites
89th out of 100 books — 14 voters


More lists with this book...

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 3,000)
filter  |  sort: default (?)  |  rating details
Idle Hippo
wew, cepet juga ternyata bacanya. kurang dari sehari udah kelar. tanda2 kepulihan dan membaiknya napsu membaca kah? :D

Men forget everything; women remember everything.


Inti dari buku ini adalah... laki-laki dan perempuan itu beda!
ya iya lah, nenek-nenek juga tau soal itu mah

Secara keseluruhan bukuna lumayan menarik. buku ini mencoba mengurai perbedaan2 mendasar antara laki2 dan perempuan dari sudut ilmiah . kenapa laki2 suka begini? kenapa perempuan begini? seperti itulah.
bacanya sambil cengar...more
Jennifer
I received it as a gift. I hated it! If I could give it zero stars I would.

The husband and wife who wrote this book claim to be social scientists. Their style of writing is not in the least bit scientific. They do the reader the grand favor of presenting "facts" backed up by hard science and sifting through the information on gender differences so the reader doesn't have to.

In my opinion, what they really did was start out with a theory and discard anything that didn't agree with it. Some of th...more
Hosna
I probably should not be reviewing this book now because I am going to sound like a raging bitch. However, I realized I would never be able to review this book with any amount of respect given its content. So, I might as well review it now. This book is full of “facts” of the modern day sexual clichés popularized by the media - Men are from Mars, women are from Venus. They are different. They THINK different, they ACT different and they WANT different things.

Right. Now, there is nothing wrong w...more
mahatma
saya beli buku ini untuk lucu-lucuan saja, menyelingi buku lain yang makin bikin bingung...
tapi memang buku ini ditulis denga lucu, dengan menyenangkan, sehingga kita ingin terus ingin tahu.
terus terang,
banyak yang baru saya tahu tentang hubungan laki-laki dan perempuan, perbedaan dan persamaannya [`same species, different worlds` demikian judul salah satu babnya:], di usia yang sudah senja ini.
cara menjelaskan perbedaan dan persamaannya itu si penulis mengandalkan informasi dari dunia psikologi...more
Temee Tapiheroe
Aug 27, 2007 Temee Tapiheroe rated it 3 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: women who desperately need explanation about men, and men who need good point of views about women.
Well, because I am a woman, so I learned lot of things about men from this book. And I got so much explanations why sometimes women (like me) just couldn't understand men. Hahaha.. I think, men should read this book too. If they were reading this, good for them. With this book, men would much more understand us. Like my boyfriend, he finds so much familiar things (that happened between us) in this book, and he said : "I understand you better than before, cause this book gave me how-to-think-wome...more
Jen
In our modern society, it is not politically correct to assume that men and women are anything but equal, and equality is defined as exactly the same. Same desires, same goals, and same needs. Allan Pease and his wife Barbara write that this is anything but how it really is. Neither sex is superior to the other, but they assert we are unquestionably different. From an evolutionary psychology perspective, our brains have been wired for different priorities based upon thousands of years of unique...more
Alvina

Asal muasal saya menemukan buku ini sebenernya karena aki hippo yang udah ngereview duluan. Ngek, baca review dia kok merasa tergugah (ceile bahasanya) untuk menamatkan buku ini juga. Kenapa?
Soalnya ada kasus yang sama persis kejadiannya dengan saya dan Si Ayah.

Me : "Yah, makan di luar yuk."
A: "Nanti sore ya."
Me: "Yes..", (kegirangan)
-sore datang-
Me : "Katanya mau makan di luar, Yah?"
A : "Ya udah digelar aja sana karpetnya deket kolam, nanti Ayah bantu usungin piringnya."
Me: "Lah.. deket kolam?"...more
Fahim
This book is very useful. It is a must for every person to read this book in order to learn about differences between men and women. This book talks about different tastes between men and women in cloths, social activities and other things. The author shares real life and practical examples that you can see in yourself and your partner in everyday life. There are explanations about men/women differences that if you take them into account you can learn a lot about your partner and improve your re...more
Svetla Angelova
Много се смях, докато я четох, защото съвпаденията са абсолютно точни. Апропо, има чудесен тест за мъжките, женските и "средните" мозъци. Аз се оказах от тези, средните. Препоръчвам Ви я!
Sebah
لطيف. انتصفت به و لم أكمله، مادته شبيهة إلى حد كبير بالكتاب السابق الذي قرأتها للكاتبين. لكن هذا الكتاب موجه نحو الحقائق الحيوية و الدماغية التي تشكل هذه الاختلافات.

--

اقتبست:

"Men and women are different. Not better or worse - just different."


"Those who resist the idea that our biology affects our behaviour often do so with the best of intentions - they oppose sexism. But they are confused about the difference between equal and identical which are two completely different issues." (italics in o...more
Sarah Potter
This is a most illuminating, fascinating, and potentially life-changing read. I only wish this book had been available when I was young, so I could have been more patient with people generally, whichever sex they were. I'd no idea how at the mercy of hormones we all are, even before we're born.According to this book, male and female brains are wired up so differently that it's amazing that the two sexes get on as well as they do.

There's a must-do quiz that measures on a scale how male or female...more
Mjaballah
I read this book a long time ago, however I remember the style of writing being very entertaining and informative. Although it's written by a male author, he confirms the theory by drawing numerous examples from his wife, family and friends. Just and FYI, he has published numerous books in the past with his wife, including their most successful book "The Definitive Book of Body Language".

The book covers numerous topics, from social interests and spacial capabilities to love and marriage. But per...more
Joevarian
Cukup banyak buku-buku psikologi populer yang beredar di luar sana tidak memiliki kerangka ilmiah yang nyata. Bahkan, seringkali buku-buku dengan label psikologi di toko-toko buku terdekat sebenarnya bukanlah buku psikologi, melainkan hanya sekedar buku self-help yang ditulis tidak berdasarkan kerangka ilmiah psikologi. Namun, tidak demikian dengan buku ini. Memang, buku-buku psikologi populer ditujukan untuk mereka orang awam yang tidak mengerti kejiwaan manusia, namun bagusnya buku ini adalah...more
Sazlin M. Aini
I read this book and all titles in the series several years ago. At the time, I found them to be “enlightening” and “revealing” about gender difference to my then inadequate, uninformed self. The writing has a certain charm and an aura of openness that is inviting and non-threatening, with enough photos of brain scans and charts and “scientific data” to sound well-researched and knowledgeable, that it made me comfortable enough to accept its claims as reasonable and true.

Here’s the thing — when...more
Ali Garawi
الكتاب في المجمل رائع في تقسيمه وتسلسله ، لا يخلو من التكرار والإعادة والزيادة على بعض النقاط والمحاور ، يعرض الكاتبان أفكارهما ومعتقداتهما بقوة ويؤكدان عليها ، يستعرض الكتاب الفروقات الفسيلوجية والنفسية والفكرية بين الجنسين وتأثير التنشأة والمجتمع والدين والمعتقدات والسياسة على تفكير وتصرفات الجنسين ، كما هو غني بالمعلومات والحقائق

يعجبني انصاف الكاتبين في الطرح والاستناد على الحقائق العلمية والإحصاءات والدراسات الموثقة بالأرقام والمراجع .

كما يوجد بعض التمارين والامثله والرسوم البيانية والصور ل...more
Jane Dee
Jun 26, 2008 Jane Dee rated it 2 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: people who want a book to back up their bad behaviour
According to this book, I am "more likely" to be a lesbian because I have a masculine brain. This book also supports evolution but says that "Nature wants us to procreate and uses powerful drugs to do so." Yuh-huh, okay and what is "nature"? And why does it have wants? The advice in this book is stupid. The female author claims that she still has trouble finding her way home - yeah maybe because she is stupid not because she is female. None of the authors are psychologists or psychiatrists or ev...more
Bárbara Hernandes
Feb 01, 2011 Bárbara Hernandes rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: Letícia, Natália
Recommended to Bárbara by: Lucila
Só não digo que bati o recorde (li o livro em 1 dia) porque o recorde foi um livro da Agatha Christie que li em pouco mais de 2h, sem parar)!

Muito divertido, adorei!

------------------------------

Comecei a ler esse livro sem muitas expectativas e me surpreendi! Tem vários dados científicos e biológicos, de forma bastante bem humorada, que explicam as diferenças entre homens e mulheres e os conflitos que essas relações envolvem.

Algumas passagens falam sobre habilidades típicas de cada sexo, difere...more
Ardyth
This was a gift from a family member, ostensibly to help me navigate marriage successfully (though I rather suspect "traditionally" is a better word). I'd hoped at least for some new/interesting science, but this was not to be. The book merely recycles cliches ("men aren't designed to multitask" sort of thing).

Sure it's no shock for you that my advice is to save your time and money...unless your relationship is really falling apart. In which case, maybe you've forgotten some of the obvious point...more
Elissa Anne
I want to give this book 7 out of 10 or 3.5 stars.
I believe in God and I'm neutral to evolution (don't care whether it happened or not). This book talked a lot about the sexes from an evolutionary and scientific perspective.

Some of the information seemed fairly straightforward and I felt like I'd heard it before. However, this book broadened my mind to how men view sex, love, marriage and intimacy. It also taught me plenty that I did not know about estrogen, testosterone, other hormones and ho...more
aTeh
Feb 19, 2008 aTeh rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: wira.broto@gmail.com
hmmmmm....
buku ini mengungkapkan perbedaan pikiran antara pria dan wanita agar sukses membina hubungan. Lupakan segala sesuatu yang dianggap benar tentang lawan jenis yang pernah anda dengar. Pria dan Wanita adalah tidk sama. memahami hal ini merupakan free ticket bagi anda untuk mampu menikmati kebahagiaan, menjalin dan mempertahankan hubungan.
so... enjoy this book...
Tedy
Jun 12, 2008 Tedy rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: cowok dan cewek, no bencong...
Recommended to Tedy by: my bebe..(jangan baca bebek ya)
wew..after you read this book you'll know exactly the reasons why are men and women have a different way in everything.

bis baca buku ini gua cuman bisa mikir sambil cengar-cengir sendiri...oh iya ya...oh gitu...baru tahu gua kenapa gua gak suka nemenin cewek gua ke mall...kenapa cewek gua suka cerewet kalo kumis ma jenggot gua dipotong, dll..dll..
Michelle
Can't we all just get along?! Nope. We, men and women, are wired differently from birth and trying to pretend that we are "equal" only widens the chasm between the sexes. We are different. Not better or worse, just different. The sooner we understand this, the more effectively we will be able to communicate and have healthy relationships.
Vera
É um livro interessante mas que deve ser lido com uma pitada de sal.

Antes de mais nem todos encaixamos na "caixinha dos géneros".

E em segundo lugar, lá porque estamos "geneticamente programados" para fazer algo não quer dizer que não tentemos amenizar essa nossa característica que, não só arrelia o outro género, como nos torna (a meu ver) seres menos inteligentes.

Se a ti te apetece falar mas ao teu companheiro do sexo masculino lhe apetece paz e sossego. Cala-te.

Se estás "geneticamente programad...more
Galih.nurlaela
Buku ini mengupas secara detail keterhubungan otak pria dan wanita dengan sikap,pikiran, karir, dan kemampuan keduanya. Sangat menarik untuk dibaca sehingga pria dan wanita bisa bersosialisasi dengan baik baik di keseharian ataupun dunia kerja.
Pria dan wanita harus mampu memahami potensi terbaik mereka sehingga tidak ada lagi kaum yang menuntut kesetaraan gender karena secara biologis pun mereka diciptakan berbeda.
Hal yang menarik menurut saya adalah penulis mengupas secara detail kemampuan otak...more
Ayu Puspita Sari
Usually self-help books bores outta me. They're just, well, popular book, with no basic scientific research and basen on just plain observation. But this book is good, give me the right thing, a scientific fact without being as plain as a textbook. I like it.
Arlene
If you have read 'Men from Mars,Women from Venus' then you should look at this. Easy to read and understand. Written humorously and you will find yourself nodding along with some of things said.
Lina Kama
Selain dari bab berkaitan homoseksual, lesbian dan manusia wujud kerana evolusi alam, saya hampir bersetuju dengan apa sahaja yang dibentangkan dalam buku ini.
Nicole G.
Ugh, where to begin with this one? The title was sexist, but I hoped it was ironic. It's not. Men and women are different. Did you know this? Women talk too much and men don't show their feeling. It's all biological. Let's name-drop some studies to back it up, but not give footnotes to actual papers or studies should the reader wish to investigate further. The authors are supposedly for equal treatment of the sexes, but they certainly like to constantly reference that life was so much easier whe...more
Tim Williams
Very interesting and very thought provoking. After reading a couple of the other reviews that really seemed upset with this book, I have to wonder if their reaction isn't more about this book not conforming to their view of the world as opposed to the other reasons they give. If nothing else, you could debate the information presented as correct or not, but regardless it doesn't make sense to get all worked up over it and angry. An overly emotional response seems to align more with not applying...more
Katja
No, the title wasn't meant to be ironic. They were actually being SERIOUS. I don't know if reading about 20 pages of a book before throwing it across the room counts as "reading" it, but that's what I did. As a psychologist, my bullshit radar was off the charts from page 1, in response to sentences like (I'm paraphrasing), "we read thousands of research studies, and they all said one thing - men and women are different." Firstly, you'd be hard pressed to find ONE psychological research paper tha...more
« previous 1 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 99 100 next »
topics  posts  views  last activity   
ayo bincang soal pria dan wanita 1 32 Apr 28, 2008 09:24PM  
  • Mars and Venus in the Bedroom: A Guide to Lasting Romance and Passion
  • Make Every Man Want You: How to Be So Irresistible You'll Barely Keep from Dating Yourself!
  • Why Him? Why Her?: Understanding Your Personality Type and Finding the Perfect Match
  • The Manual: A True Bad Boy Explains How Men Think, Date, and Mate- And What Women Can Do to Come Out on Top
  • Ten Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives
  • The Modern Girl's Guide to Life
  • The Enneagram Made Easy: Discover the 9 Types of People
  • Don't Sweat the Small Stuff in Love: Simple Ways to Nurture and Strengthen Your Relationships While Avoiding the Habits That Break Down Your Loving Connection
  • How to Read a Person Like a Book
  • The Personality Code: Unlock the Secret to Understanding Your Boss, Your Colleagues, Your Friends...and Yourself!
  • The Multi-Orgasmic Man: Sexual Secrets Every Man Should Know
  • Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them : When Loving Hurts and You Don't Know Why
  • The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships
  • Grammar Girl's 101 Words to Sound Smart
  • How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less
  • Personality Plus. Florence Littauer
  • Women Who Love Too Much: When You Keep Wishing and Hoping He'll Change
  • Der Dativ ist dem Genitiv sein Tod: Ein Wegweiser durch den Irrgarten der deutschen Sprache (Der Dativ ist dem Genitiv sein Tod, #1)
75844
Allan Pease is an Australian author and motivational speaker. Despite having no education in psychology, neuroscience, or psychiatry, he has managed to establish himself as an "expert on relationships".

Originally a musician, he became a successful life insurance salesman, he started a career as a speaker and trainer in sales and latterly in body language. This resulted in a popular sideline of aud...more
More about Allan Pease...
The Definitive Book of Body Language Body Language: How to Read Others' Thoughts by Their Gestures Why Men Lie And Women Cry Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love: Solving the Mystery of Attraction Why Men Don't Have a Clue and Women Always Need More Shoes: The Ultimate Guide to the Opposite Sex

Share This Book

“Men, however, shouldn't despair. They are excellent at identifying and imitating animal sounds, which would have been a significant advantage for the ancient hunter. Sadly, that's not quite as much use today.” 8 likes
“Femeile nu se descurcă bine în spaţiu, pentru că în evoluţia lor n-au vînat altceva decît bărbaţi.” 1 likes
More quotes…