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Miss Manners on Painfully Proper Weddings

really liked it 4.0  ·  Rating Details ·  84 Ratings  ·  19 Reviews
The doyenne of American etiquette experts now turns her undivided attention to weddings. In her trademark bossy, witty, and authoritative way, Miss Manners gives advice that will make the big day more pleasant for one and all, including the bride. 15 line drawings.
Hardcover, 208 pages
Published January 26th 1999 by Crown (first published December 26th 1995)
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Feb 27, 2009 Rachel rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: ugh
Miss Manners has gone musty. She appears to be stuck in a past century (not necessarily the last one) and vehemently sticks to rules of propriety that are realistically no longer feasible in this day and age. Take the response card for example, which she opposes because everyone should know to rsvp for a wedding. However, how many people would actually take the time to write a proper rsvp and put it in the mail in a timely manner? In this day of cell phones, blackberries, email, text messages, a ...more
Jan 20, 2009 Jennifer rated it really liked it
Shelves: nonfiction, wedding
This is a very entertaining little book- it's not simply an etiquette book, but a series of anecdotes loosely arranged around the parts of a wedding.

I did learn quite a bit from this slim volume, but some of the real rules of etiquette, I fear, we will not be following. Response cards? Totally not necessary, in the world of etiquette. But I have a hard time seeing some people responding without them. I guess it's a sign of the times.

No matter! I am well warned against being a bridezilla, and am
Jul 18, 2008 Beth rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Brides looking to follow the rules
Miss Manners has both her fans and critics, but this book is a must-have resource for brides in the first camp.

The book was published in 1999, meaning that brides have been committing all sorts of internet sins in the absence of her guidence, but most of her instruction still rings true: only invite the amount of guests you can afford, handling family issues, etc.

She offers a bevy of advice, including examples, on various wording for wedding invitations. A helpful read for most brides.
Jun 23, 2013 Hannah rated it liked it
Shelves: letters
I've been a fan of Miss Manners, the etiquette advice columnist, for some time. This entertaining and sometimes hilarious book (written in 1995) is still applicable today, and mixes short essays with re-prints of her advice to bemused brides, families, and guests. I enjoy her take on wedding etiquette, which debunks a lot of the supposed demands of wedding etiquette, such as matching bridesmaids dresses and multiple showers.
Sep 01, 2010 Melissa rated it liked it
I actually read a newer version entitled, Miss Manners Guide to a Surprisingly Dignified Wedding, but that wasn't on goodreads.
This book caught my eye in the library and it was enlightening to read. I realized things I did wrong (I have never forgotten that I forgot to mail my thank you notes). I have also learned the importance of teaching manners, because so many things that are "necessities" for weddings are actually in poor taste.
Apr 29, 2009 Marnie rated it it was amazing
This book saved my sanity during a very stressful process. It seems everyone has advice for you when you are planning your wedding. This book served as a very good guide and allowed me to politely explain why I was doing things the way I had planned them; Miss Manners is highly regarded as a woman who knows her stuff.
Sep 20, 2007 Magda rated it it was amazing
Shelves: non-fiction, own
The monkey part gets me every time.
Mar 11, 2009 Purlewe rated it it was amazing
Shelves: non-fiction
Last nite I went home and read more books. I am reading Miss Manner's Painfully Proper Weddings. I picked it up b'c when I saw the title I thought of Jackie. This book is SUCH a HOOT! I've been laughing my butt off and glad I picked it up. I might have to re-check it out before the wedding to get laughing about it again.

Right before bed, my new favorite was about a family we were refusing to come to the wedding b'c their MONKEY had not been invited. Yes, monkey. They are "training the monkey to
Mar 06, 2013 Kelly rated it it was ok
Miss Manners is kind of a snooty bitch. That said, this book was great for putting me to sleep and I enjoyed reading the outrageous letters from readers who felt they'd been slighted by brides and grooms, added by Miss Manners' outrage. I guess I violated some etiquette by sending response cards with my wedding invitation, but I am glad I now know bringing gifts to the reception is another etiquette violation.
Sep 12, 2011 Olivia rated it it was ok
That Miss Manners sure is a curmudgeon! This book is from like 1995...I found it at a used book store a few days after we got engaged, and thought I would check it out.

It's less of an "advice" book, per se, and more of a "making snide remarks at people you disapprove of" book.

Jan 11, 2011 Brittany rated it liked it
Shelves: nonfiction
Very useful, especially the opening section, "Things the Bride Need Not Worry Her Pretty Head About." It seems to boil down to remaining calm, rational, and not acquisitive. Also, a very entertaining read aside!
Richard White
Mar 28, 2013 Richard White rated it really liked it
Miss Manners is delightfully terse in her replies to people who are a little confused about wedding etiquette. As someone who was more than a little confused about wedding etiquette, this was a big help for me.
Feb 24, 2011 Whitney rated it really liked it
I love Miss Manners, even if I don't 100% agree with her somewhat old-fashioned etiquette rules. She's hilarious and a bit condescending but she lets you in on the joke. I want to read all of her books!
Dec 30, 2009 Kathryn rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Miss Manners always makes me laugh. Plus, it feels great to smugly agree with her - until you don't and you have to get all defensive. No reply cards? Really?
Kris Larson
Oct 25, 2009 Kris Larson rated it it was amazing
Miss Manners wields her pen with wit and venom. Genius. Come for the biting retorts, stay for the monkey.

Also, wedding registries are tacky. There, we said it.
Oct 12, 2007 Kate rated it it was amazing
Shelves: nonfiction, weddings
Indispensable for many reasons to anyone planning a wedding or remotely afflicted by one. Proper, brilliant, and funny enough to cause frequent and inappropriate snorting.
Jun 05, 2008 A. rated it really liked it
This is basically the only book you need to read before you get married, unless you want to read about how to spend lots of money, in which case, godspeed to you.
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Judith Martin (née Perlman), better known by the pen name Miss Manners, is an American journalist, author, and etiquette authority.

Since 1978 she has written an advice column, which is distributed three times a week by United Features Syndicate and carried in more than 200 newspapers worldwide. In the column, she answers etiquette questions contributed by her readers and writes short essays on pro
More about Judith Martin...

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“A small wedding is not necessarily one to which very few people are invited. It is one to which the person you are addressing is not invited.” 8 likes
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