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I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus: A Breathers Christmas Carol

3.95  ·  Rating Details  ·  305 Ratings  ·  82 Reviews
“One of America’s best satiric novelists” (Kirkus Reviews), S. G. Browne seamlessly gift wraps this horrific and hilarious sequel to his “extremely strong” (Publishers Weekly, starred review) zombie novel Breathers.

He sees you when you’re sleeping . . . he knows when you’re undead.

How does the leader of a failed zombie civil rights movement from California rescue a group
ebook, 208 pages
Published October 30th 2012 by Gallery Books
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(showing 1-30 of 1,193)
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Shamus McCarty
I'm not much for Christmas stories, but the title of this one caught my eye so I entered a contest to win it. And then won it.

I never read the first book, because I typically stay away from books with a heart on the cover, so there were some parts that I didn't really get. However, S.G. did a good job of filling in most of the blanks. Behind the story of a thinking zombie is the story of what Christmas is like for the child of a single alcoholic mother. It tugged at the heart strings a little, a
Kathy Worrell  ツ
Zombies? Santa Claus? Combined together can they form a respectable Christmas story?

Yes, yes, and surprisingly enough......yes!

Ok, I bought this book last year because it was on the clearance table at Hastings book store for $1. No, I'm not a fan of zombies....not even a little bit. Just too gross and messy for me. But, I am a fan of huge discounts. (90% off) woo-hoo! (All Life of a Book Addict members know what I mean.)

Somehow the fingers just picked the book up and the eyes took over.

Frishawn Quinn
Andy's story is one that will tug at your heart, make your flesh crawl, have you seeing red, and tickle every funny bone in your body. It seems that our undead narrator has had one hell of a year; going from a voice in the dark for zombie rights to a lab rat for tests unfit for the smarmiest of rodents. It's a good thing that he can still manage some snark with his lips sewn shut...right?

This is a zombie read with real brains. In fact, in most cases the zombies are not only smarter than the "bre
Anna Motteler
Nov 07, 2012 Anna Motteler rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: favorites
I read this book in about two hours. If even that. I took it with me to the bathroom for a bubble bath, while I made dinner, etc. This book was AMAZING. & I can't say that enough. Not just for the fact that its about zombies, which is enough of a reason to want to read it, but it's a story about a father's love for his daughter. You really need to pick up this book & read it, because you will be hooked on it. I can promise you that. It's hilarious, well written & heartwarming. I love ...more
Nov 11, 2012 Rachel rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I really enjoyed this book. I don't think it's a prerequisite to have read Breathers, even though this is a sequel. There are some characters and parts where it might help to better inform the reader. This is a light, funny read that I'd recommend to anyone who likes zombies or just wants a unique Christmas story.
Oct 19, 2015 Cyndi rated it really liked it
Above average outing. Nice to check in with the non-breathers again. I feel the secondary tale is what made this short a good read....
William Bentrim
Dec 02, 2012 William Bentrim rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus by S. G. Browne
My initial reaction to this book was less than stellar. I made an assumption (you can guess where this is going.) that is was going to be roughly in the sheer idiocy category. Well, imagine my surprise when I enjoyed the book. The story is the deprivation of zombies by society and the zombie side of the story.

Andy Warner portrays a poignant, abused figure in this tale of discrimination. I’m not sure black humor aptly describes the book or the plot.
Jason Donnelly
Jul 02, 2013 Jason Donnelly rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Andy's back!

If you loved Breathers: A Zombie's Lament, you're going to love this one. It's written with the same fast wit and imagery that we've grown accustomed to with S.G. Browne's work and I couldn't be happier having the chance to read it before the release date on October 30th, 2012.

We start off the story with Andy, in a zombie research facility in Portland, Oregon. He was the leader of a zombie uprising, after which a lot of new zombie laws were put into place. There's a tip of the hat to
Dec 16, 2012 Karissa rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I got a copy of this book in exchange for a honest review through the Goodreads First Reads program. Thanks to Gallery Books and Goodreads for allowing me the opportunity to review this book. I read Browne’s book Breathers when it was released a few years ago and really enjoyed it. I was really looking forward to reading this book as well. This ended up being a fun, yet short, zombie Christmas read. It was gory, disturbing, entertaining, and even a bit heart-warming.

This book picks up where Brea
May 14, 2013 Nicole rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: fiction, zombie
"If I Only Had Some Brains
lyrics by Andy Warner

I could gnaw away the hours
Delightfully devour
Digesting Johns and Janes
And my mouth I'd be fillin'
While my hands were busy killin'
If I only had some brains

I'd faddle and I'd fiddle
Fat fry you on the griddle
Sauteing your remains
On you flesh I'd be snackin'
And your skull I would be crackin'
If I only had some brains

Oh, ever since I've died
I've longed for blood and gore
Just to sit and eat the brains that I adore
And then I'd sit and eat some more

I would
Joseph Parker
Jan 19, 2015 Joseph Parker rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
4 Reasons that you should be reading “I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus”

Today, instead of defending my love for witty low-brow literature, I'm going to jump right into the review and tell you why YOU, early fan and follower of Blake before he gets famous, lets fame get to his head, and buys a mansion with a mote full of crocodiles, should be reading “I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus,” by S. G. Browne.

Reason 1: Zombies we care about, that would still eat us.
In “I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus,”
Nov 22, 2012 Conny rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I was a First Read Winner of this book and loved it. We find out what it is like to see the world from the perspective of the Zombie, something completely different and fresh. It captured my attention from page one, it had enough gore to satisfy any Zombie fan, but it was also very tenderhearted and sweet. I thoroughly enjoyed the characters and the story line and can't wait to read other works from S.G. Browne. Not your average Christmas Story thats for sure. I highly recommend it.
Jan 26, 2015 Drew rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
A quick, fun read. Lots of action, could easily be a zippy straight-to-DVD movie. These zombies are quite aware they are dead, and quite aware that the medical/security/law enforcement industrial complex considers them less "undead people" than "things", animals to be controlled. Veers dangerously close to maudlin, sappy sad kiddie territory, but it is a holiday book. Being in retail currently, I gravitate to any store that subverts any and all standard holiday tropes. If this was a regular TV h ...more
Kim Miner Litton
Mar 03, 2014 Kim Miner Litton rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: adult
I felt Breathers was pretty perfect on its own and didn't think I wanted or needed a sequel, but I am a huge fan of the author and won this book in a contest on his blog.


It was satisfying to see, after the ending of Breathers, that at least Andy, everyone's favorite angsty Zombie, survived his zombie last stand. He enters a bit of a "chosen one" sort of path here. He's different for some reason, which is why he gets
Holden Attradies
Feb 22, 2014 Holden Attradies rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: fiction, zombie
If I have any complaints about this book it's that it was too short! Other then that it was a fun read that continued Andy's story as well as showing the implications of Andy's actions after the first book was over.

Mostly though the book tied up the biggest loose end from the first book: Andy's daughter. It always bugged me that he never really tried to see her and I feel through this book both the character and the reader got some closure on that issue, even if this wasn't REALLY his daughter.
Nov 22, 2012 Jessica rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: first-reads
The title alone was enough to pique my interest. The premise hooked me even more. From there, all it took was page one to get me entrenched into the delightful world of Breathers and Zombies.

Admittedly, I was expecting something along the lines of Christopher Moore's raucous hilarity. I was more reminded of Dave Barry's quirky, lively, fast-paced style, which was no less joyous. At any rate, it was quite enjoyable, and the entire time I felt eager to know what happened next - what is Andy going
Oct 18, 2012 Cassie-la rated it it was amazing
Shelves: 2012-reads

This sequel to Breathers: A Zombie’s Lament (S.G. Browne’s first published novel) is every bit as wonderful- if not more wonderful than its predecessor. I could read a whole series of books set in the Breather‘s universe! Set one year after the first book, I Saw Zombies contains some spoilers to the original including the fate of its main characters. But, if you merely want to read a, “… Holly-jolly- zombie Christmas” story about a girl and
Alex Telander
Jan 30, 2013 Alex Telander rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
The bestselling author of the hilariously entertaining zombie book, Breathers, has a Christmas treat for you: a zombie holiday novella featuring some of the characters you’ve come to love from Breathers. It’s a Christmas miracle like no other; one you won’t soon forget.

Andy Warner is having problems. Other than being a zombie, he’s also a test subject in a horrible lab, where the employees care nothing about their zombie guinea pigs and will poke and prod, burn and dismember, and do whatever the
Dec 04, 2013 Brendan rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Want a novel with a zombie dressed like Santa Claus? You got it.

Alex Winter, the undead narrator of Breathers, finds himself the object of incessant experimentation and torment at a government research facility. He escapes and, because of his long white hair and beard, quickly dresses as Santa Claus. The story that follows is an amusing little Christmas tale, a blend of humor, horror, and holiday cheer.

A few thoughts:

- I’ve read Browne’s short story “Zombie Gigolo,” so I can attest that he has
Apr 23, 2013 Cale rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Maybe I just don't get the satire. Maybe it's a meta book, where the story itself is less important than the overall feeling. Because the plot moved like a zombie; plodding, brainless and slow. But the story didn't. Is he satirizing Christmas stories by putting a 'zombie' in it? Or is he satirizing 'zombie' books by putting what could just as easily been a diabetic prisoner in it? Either way, it just didn't work for me. The book is a sequel, but it still takes a quarter of it to set up the plot, ...more
Richard Kelly
Well, this isn't Breathers, but it is entertaining.

I liked it. It started out slow and I was disappointed. I thought that it was going to be a huge disappointment, but it got better.

I think the problem I had was that I remember Breathers as a fun Zombie romp. And although this one gets there, it spends a good amount of time covering the Christmasy sub plot. Which is fine, it is a Christmas Carol afterall. But, it did leave me worried for a little while.

It is a short book, fun and quick. The wr
Jan 08, 2013 Suge rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I finished this WAY before Christmas, and forgot to update my status here (damn xmas). I loved this tale about as much as I'd loved the first novel by Browne entitled Breathers. I remember meeting Browne at ZomBCon a few years ago and asking if he'd ever consider continuing on with the tale of Andy. I'm so glad he did. This was a perfect novel to read for Christmas time, whether you love Christmas or zombies. The story continues with Andy being in a research facility for Zombies. We follow him a ...more
Feb 01, 2016 Lori rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Lori by: Jennifer Purcell
This was a gift that I finally got a chance to read. It seems to be a trio and this is the middle book. An interesting take on zombies - the only thing that makes them a zombie is that they are the undead and that they eat humans to keep themselves alive and keeps them from rotting. Other then that they can be perceived as "Breathers" This is about Andy who became a zombie after a car wreck that left his wife dead. Apparently it's a gene that's passed done, but not everyone is affected. This sec ...more
Donald Armfield
My sixth first reads win. Without reading synopsis because the title alone caught my eye. I had thought I would be reading a book with horror and gore at a local shopping mall. or something like that.

Annie makes her Santa wish for a better mom and a big stuffed panda bear. Andy shot in the head somehow became a zombie trapped at a facility where they run test on zombies. From spraying with pine-sol, electric probes and numerous other things us breathers would say ouch over.

Escaped from facility
Barry Huddleston
“I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus” by S.G. Browne is the follow-up to “Breathers: A Zombie’s Lament”. Having said that, I really don’t think that you need to read “Breathers” to enjoy “I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus”.

I enjoyed the satire and the heart-warming story. All too often, the book gave me that deep dark chuckle that so many of my friends and family find amusing and somewhat disturbing. The zombies remind me of the type that you will find in “Zombie Housewives of the Apocalypse” or “Zo
Mar 05, 2013 Jenevieve rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A follow-up to Breathers and billed as a Breathers Christmas Carol. Andy has been at a zombie research facility since he was captured a year ago at the frat house with his other zombie buddies. He has been experimented on and treated worse than an animal for that entire time. Now someone from PETZ (people for the ethical treatment of zombies) has freed him and the other zombies from the facility. Now on the outside, he wants to find a way to free his friends that were recaptured but how is one l ...more
Oct 04, 2014 Mycoton32 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
En bref, j'ai passé un très bon moment avec Andy et ses amis, comme le premier opus c'est bourré d'humour mais pas que, il est aussi question d'amitié, de loyauté, de gentillesse et de pleins d'autres petites choses... A lire et à offrir sous le sapin ! (faut être prévoyant !!)
Aaron (Typographical Era)
Author S.G. Browne arrived on the literary scene in 2009 with his novel Breathers: A Zombie’s Lament. Seamlessly blending elements of horror and black comedy, and featuring a non-traditional writing style that utilized fragmented sentences and repeated phrases to emphasize his protagonist’s slanted world view, this debut story would quickly establish Browne as a talent to watch. It was a welcomed, intelligent piece, that was powered by an undercurrent of social commentary that helped elevate it ...more
Jan 17, 2013 Alicia rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book was a clever take on the zombie apocalypse. S.G. Browne has a very different view of what zombies could be compared to the rest of us. In fact, it's not even really an apocalypse-most zombies are being kept as science experiments. And they can think and speak! Browne has an interesting writing style that I enjoy very much. He has a way of making things that should be dark seem rather funny, or just plain weird. The book was a very interesting tale about a zombie with a heart who just w ...more
Lauren Stoolfire
I loved this darkly humorous take on zombies! Andy's story really tugged at my heartstrings. Despite the fact that he is undead, in various states of decomposition and at times eating human flesh, he is the character you want to root for in comparison to the living Breathers.
It works well as a standalone novel, but I would love to get my hands on a copy of Breathers: A Zombie's Lament and start at the beginning of Andy's new found reanimate life.
I can't get "If I Only Had Some Brains" out of m
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S.G. Browne - Author: Zombie Christmas Haiku Giveaway 1 5 Nov 12, 2012 09:33AM  
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S.G. Browne is the author of the novels Less Than Hero, Big Egos, Lucky Bastard, Fated, and Breathers, as well as the novella I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus. His short story collection Shooting Monkeys in a Barrel contains ten twisted tales and is available as an eBook.

He loves dark comedies, Ben & Jerry's ice cream, and is a sucker for It's a Wonderful Life. You can learn more about S.G. Br
More about S.G. Browne...

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