Turn That Down!

"It will, it will rock you."
- Queen

"It's only about rock and roll but I like it."
- The Rolling Stones

"It feels good! So good! I got Lew!"
- James Brown

"Wake up, Little Susie. Wake up and read something. You're 58 years old, for crying out loud."
-The Everly Brothers

"I bet he thinks this blurb is about him."
-Carly Simon

When the phenomenon known as rock and roll burst upon the world in the 1950s, few people realized how completely it would come to dominate American life in just a few short weeks. But Lewis Grossberger, then a neurotic adolescent, instinctively grasped the danger posed by Elvis, Chubby, Chuck, and their successors, and took shelter under a pile of trash in his parents' basement.

Now, after more than half a century of McCartney's, Morrison's, Miss Ross's, Madonna's, and Michael's musical mayhem, Grossberger has re-emerged to fulfill his destiny as the one person qualified to complete the work of the great historian Arnold Toynbee, who said on his deathbed, 'Sadly, I have cancelled my epic chronicle of rock and roll as my subject is too silly for a man of my caliber. Also, I am defunct.' He then expired.

Although rock and roll's riotous, ridiculous history has foiled hundreds of lesser authors, Grossberger employs the latest in writing techniques, including sensationalist jests, inappropriate puns, and saucy bon mots, in order to reveal the shocking hilarity that courses through rock history like some underground stream stocked with phosphorescent fish. Yes, we said phosphorescent fish. Flickering deep, deep in the blackness of a winding cavern for untold millennia.

Now stop puzzling over that last paragraph, put this book in your shopping cart and just buy it. You've been web surfing on company time for long enough.