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I Could Pee on This And Other Poems by Cats
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I Could Pee on This And Other Poems by Cats

3.97  ·  Rating Details  ·  5,621 Ratings  ·  850 Reviews
Cat lovers will laugh out loud at the quirkiness of their feline friends with these insightful and curious poems from the singular minds of housecats.

In this hilarious book of tongue-in-cheek poetry, the author of the internationally syndicated comic strip Sally Forth helps cats unlock their creative potential and explain their odd behaviour to ignorant humans.

With title
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Hardcover, 112 pages
Published August 15th 2012 by Chronicle Books (first published 2012)
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Dewey by Vicki MyronThe Cat in the Hat by Dr. SeussOld Possum's Book of Practical Cats by T.S. EliotAlice's Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking-Glass by Lewis CarrollThe Complete Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson
Great "Cat" Books
17th out of 1,029 books — 578 voters
Life is a Circus Run by a Platypus by Allison HawnPhantom Bigfoot Strikes Again by Simon OkillNobody Loves a Bigfoot Like a Bigfoot Babe by Simon OkillMilk, Turkey, and Neurosis by Grace Anne FeldmanLife is a Pirate Ship Run by a Velociraptor by Allison Hawn
Odd Titles
11th out of 206 books — 166 voters


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Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 3,000)
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karen
Jul 31, 2014 karen rated it it was amazing
another stupid book i feel i need to own! i saw this one at BEA, but they didn't have any free copies because they knew i would buy it eventually - they knew! so i glumly accepted my promotional postcard, and waited for it to come out, and here we are.

i am glum no longer!! it is cats!! writing poems!! real cats!! with pictures of cats!! this calls to me like candy!! i exclaim!!

some of the cats are better at writing poems than others, to be sure, and they are written in a variety of forms, showi
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Jason Koivu
Nov 21, 2014 Jason Koivu rated it it was amazing
This really makes you think...and wanna smoosh fuzzy faces!!! Yes, these cat-penned poems are structurally unsound (The iambic pentameter is a mess!), but oh how ADORABLE! You really have to be quite impressed with their mastery of the English language, and did they dictate these or can they type as well? Oh the SQUEEE of it all!!!

Though perhaps this collection poses more questions than answers, it is thoroughly enjoyable. I mean, to see into the inner thoughts of a feline and really feel their
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Kelly (and the Book Boar)
Find all of my reviews at: http://52bookminimum.blogspot.com/

My plan for this evening was to read the second volume of Locke and Key - but then this happened . . .

Commercial Photography

So I decided to give I Could Pee on This a gander in order to prevent interrupting the cat's 14th nap of the day.

Many of you are probably aware that I really like odd little books. You may also know that I have a fondness for animals - both living and dead. What you may be worried about is what happens to my pets when they cross over
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Reynje
Oct 23, 2013 Reynje rated it really liked it

bella1/

bella2/

bella3/

bella4/

bella5/

bella6/

And yet, somehow I am still a cat person.
Manny
This book

You can't eat it.
You can't kill it.
You can't tear it to pieces.
So what's all the fuss about?
Wake me when you've figured it out.
Marvin
Jul 09, 2014 Marvin rated it really liked it
Shelves: humor
I read this book to my three cats and a guest cat. Here are their (mostly) unsolicited comments.

"T. S Eliot, eat yer heart out." - Maslow the Wonder Cat

"A book of great social relevance...because I peed on it." - Ashley

"The book needs more poems and less fur" - Mojo Jojo the Sphinx

"Screw the book. Where's dinner?" - Fanci

This is a very funny book with poems by very talented cats, who actually know how to spell. Each poem catches a particular feline nuance that will be instantly recognizable to t
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Hester
Review written by Hester's cat Molly:

WHAT ARE YOU READING? WHY AREN'T YOU STARING AT ME? Maybe if I get between you and that book you'll look at me instead. Why are you laughing. I didn't do anything funny? Go clean my litter box or I'll poop next to it again. Oops I already did. I guess I'll just go over here and lick myself. I'll try to get between you and the book again. I want attention, I want attention, I want attention. Did I scratch you? Well, good, you deserved it.

Oh you're done? YAY! S
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Florencia
Suck on that, Baudelaire. Now this is what I call real, heartfelt poetry. Cats had the need of explaining themselves, of sharing their thoughts and feelings through these amazing poems. Outstanding work, honestly.
One of my favorites was:
WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING?

Why are you screaming?
What did I do wrong?
Why are you crying?
How can I make it right?
Would you like it in a different color?
Would you like it in a different size?
Would you like it in a different room?
I just wanted to show my love
I just wan
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Jubilation Lee
After some debate, I think my favorite thing about I Could Pee on This is the way it’s cat-sized.

Unlike heavy “people” books, which delicate felines might have trouble grasping in their paws, this poetry collection is petite and dainty.

Just like kitty.



Honestly I don’t know I would pay $12.95 U.S. for the pleasure of reading the inner musings of my cat’s mind, even cast down as it is in brilliant punctuation-free print, but it was still hysterically fun to look through.

The assembled cat poets w
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Carol
Mar 25, 2015 Carol rated it it was amazing
If you've ever been "owned" by a feline friend, you'll appreciate and enjoy this book of poems narrated by a cat. Many are laugh-out-loud funny and oh so true!

Over many decades of living with these supreme creatures, I have received many little gifts....alive and dead, have witnessed quite a few hairball episodes, and caught Maggie just a week ago dipping her paw into my just poured glass of milk. (they are so dam fast and sneaky) My favorite verse besides "Nudge" is "I'm Not Paranoid"...... if

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Ellen Gail
Apr 12, 2015 Ellen Gail rated it really liked it
I don't feel fully qualified to review a book of poetry written by cats, so for this review I will be turning things over to my feline masters, Penny & Chloe. Take it away, furballs!

Chloe



I could not eat it.
Very nice to rub my face and butt against.

Oh. The human says I should write more. She seemed fairly amused by it. All I know is, she was enjoying something that wasn't me. I planted myself on her chest and stuck my butt in her face to remind her of the glory of my furry hindquarters in com
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Amy (Other Amy)
Sometimes when I lie on your warm chest
And hear your every happy sigh
I gaze into your two kind eyes
And wonder, "Who is that?"
- Cat Epigram


Who could resist a title like I Could Pee on This And Other Poems by Cats? Not this reader. I picked this up for the LOLs, but honestly, I have to say, some of it makes rather good poetry as well. I think I'm going to have to buy this.

I had intended to do a more serious/parody lit crit kind of review, but my spunk seems to have deserted me today. Maybe on a re
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Debbie
Cat lovers shouldn’t miss this little gem—hysterical and wise short poems recited by the ever-cool cat. Calling it a “fast read” is an understatement—it will take you all of 15 minutes, at most, to read it. Well, you might stop to savor some of the poems a little longer, but it’s still over way before you want it to be. And you will laugh, even if you’re having a bad day.

The aloof but dear, brilliant creatures tell us all about their adventures with toys and why they end up tearing the house apa
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Sunny
Apr 20, 2014 Sunny rated it really liked it
Shelves: made-me-laugh
When I added this to my library, I commented on the update...I bought this today because I couldn't stop laughing when I looked at it in the store :)

It was a good decision because the laughter didn't stop when I got it home. This collection of poems is funny, sweet, and so very accurate when it comes to describing the behavior of cats.

Isa Lavinia
Sep 08, 2013 Isa Lavinia rated it liked it
Shelves: humour
Basically...



...cats are assholes.
Traci
Jan 07, 2013 Traci rated it it was amazing
No need to introduce this. It's exactly what it says it is: a book of poems "written" by cats. Divided into four simple chapters (Family, Work, Play, Existence), this adorable work also has gorgeous pictures of cats big and small throughout. Having officially been owned by a cat for just about a year now (and unofficially for a few more than that), I think this little book is just super-cute and captures the feline spirit of love and destruction quite well.

My favorite poem is probably "Closed Do
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Beth Cato
Dec 31, 2013 Beth Cato rated it liked it
Shelves: cats, 2013, poetry
This was a Christmas present and it made for a quick, amusing read to end the year. Really, the best word to sum up the book is "cute." The poems are simple, whimsical, and fully intended to be humor that cat lovers will immediately get. No deep, analytical poetry here. Instead, you get gems that make you smile like "I Lick Your Nose:"

I lick your nose
I lick your nose again
I drag my claws down your eyelids
Oh, you're up? Feed me

There are various mentions of urine and I recall one mention of sex, b
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Naomi
Feb 21, 2013 Naomi rated it really liked it
I am not a huge fan of poetry, but this was hilarious. I saw my cat in so many of the poems it wasn't even funny. To boot, the pictures were adorable. This would be a wonderful gift for any cat enthusiast because they would get the quirky behaviors depicted in the poems that are specific to cats. Simply loved it!

One thing that I didn't realize because I got this book from my library. Another reviewer stated that this book is $12.95. THERE IS NO WAY I WOULD PAY THIS AMOUNT FOR THIS BOOK. It was c
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Nemo (Young Adult At Heart)
See this review and more on The Moonlight Library!

This little book of poetry delighted me. I mean, it's written by cats! How awesome is that? We are treated to such gems as 'I Lick Your Nose,' 'Some of My Best Friends Are Dogs' and 'That Top Shelf'. It's way too cute! And it has pictures as well! Even though this book was priced just as high as the full-length novels I usually buy, I just couldn't help myself.

True, after a while the poems got a bit formulaic. They started out all cute, thoughtfu
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Mayda
Mar 01, 2013 Mayda rated it it was amazing
Why are you reading this review? You should not waste another moment on this or any other thing, but pick up a copy of I Could Pee on This and start reading it aloud to anyone and everyone, including those creatures with “wittle” furry faces. This book of poems illustrates with charming insights and humor the essence that is “Cat.” You will learn that you are not the only one whose cat deposited a dead mouse on your bed. (The one my cat brought me was most alive and uninjured, so consider yourse ...more
Bekah
Aug 23, 2015 Bekah rated it it was amazing
These poems are hilarious. Especially when read aloud to other cat owners, who proceed in spitting out their coffee as they try to not laugh. My favorites are Kubla Kat, Tiny Boxes, I Run & The Leash.
Rossy
Mar 19, 2015 Rossy rated it it was amazing
Shelves: animal-lover
Adorable, funny, cute poems.
I think I'm a cat.
Meow.
Riley
May 20, 2015 Riley rated it really liked it
I really liked this book! It kept me laughing until the end. I often found myself shaking my head as I turned the pages. With my sister having a cat, I can easily relate to most of the scenarios in this book. It was a really quick and funny read. I definitely recommend this book to anyone who needs a quick funny poetry read.
Jen Castagno
Nov 30, 2012 Jen Castagno rated it really liked it
Shelves: english-420
POETRY CATEGORY

I Could Pee on This is a poetry book where every poem is written from a cat's point of view. This was a fresh look at poetry and was done different than most poetry books i have read. I am not a fan of poetry at all, but i do loves cats. So i figured that this book would help me enjoy poetry more. The poems are witty and hilarious. They are simple in speech but show the complexity of the mind of the cat.

I really think this book would be great for young adults who are getting int
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Greta
Jul 10, 2015 Greta rated it liked it
FOREVER


I could lie by your side for the rest
of our lives
I think I’ll walk away right now
I could let you pet me for
a hundred years
I think we need some time apart
I could be kissed a thousand
thousand times
I think I’m needed somewhere else
I could sit on your lap forever
I said I could sit on your lap forever
Don’t you even think of trying to get up
Well, you should have gone
to the bathroom beforehand
Because forever is a very, very long time
Amy Gideon
Apr 06, 2015 Amy Gideon rated it liked it
Shelves: nonfiction, poetry
Some of the poetry works better than others. If you like cat humor you'll probably chuckle over a few of these.
Jaret
Dec 24, 2014 Jaret rated it it was amazing
Shelves: 4-5-star-books
My cousins just bought me this book for Christmas. I literally sat on the couch at my Aunt's house and finished the book in one sitting. We were all laughing hysterically at the antics in the poems. So many of them reminded us of stunts our cats have pulled in the past. My favorite poem is a haiku called "Sushi". My cat has done this more times than I care to admit to:

Did you really think
That you could hide fish in rice?
Oh, the green paste burns!

(The green paste doesn't look so hot in the litter
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Gary Butler
Apr 19, 2015 Gary Butler rated it really liked it
Shelves: poetry
28th book read in 2015.

Number 271 out of 456 on my all time book list.

Follow the link below to see my video review:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4PhI...

Gerry
Apr 06, 2015 Gerry rated it really liked it
When I saw the title on the spine of this book on a bookseller's shelf I was not in the least inspired but, fascinated by what it could be about, I took a peek. I was surprised to see the follow on title 'And Other Poems by Cats', and knowing a cat's penchant for wanted to relieve himself/herself on anything in sight on occasions, this persuaded me to make a purchase.

I feel sure that author Francesco Marciuliano was a cat in another life for he captures the essence of the feline incredibly well;
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David Sarkies
Jul 22, 2014 David Sarkies rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: Cat Lovers
Recommended to David by: Goodreads
Shelves: comedy
Experience the delight of the feline poetic form
22 June 2014

The first thing that I noticed when I looked at the reviews for this book on Goodreads is the number of cat pictures that have been used (which is not surprising for an amusing book by, for, and about cats). Well, I guess I am going to have to add to the fun with some that I have found, such as this one:

Zombies eat brains

or this one:
Once upon a time
and he certainly does not seem to be too impressed:

Where are my balls

I must admit that I discovered this book on Goodreads when somebody ha
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6075654
Francesco Marciuliano...
Pens the comic strips Sally Forth and Medium Large.
Has written for the Onion News Network, Smosh, McSweeney’s, and had a play produced at the New York International Fringe Festival.
Served as head writer for the PBS series SeeMore's Playhouse (for which his script won two regional Emmys).
Was afraid of the color yellow until about age nine.
Tans a little too well to be tru
...more
More about Francesco Marciuliano...

Share This Book



“On the edge of a laughing teacup
Did Kubla Kat decree
The the corn fritter festooned with medals
Shall make the brownies free
And so the walls turned to water
To let our sorrows drown
As the chairs burned themselves for warmth
So they need not face the clown
Then the spoons burst into song
And all the forks they understood
As I stared at my talking claws
Becasue this catnip is just that good”
10 likes
“Sometimes when I lie on your warm chest
And hear your every happy sigh
I gaze into your two kind eyes
And wonder, 'Who is that?”
6 likes
More quotes…