Fifty Shames of Earl Grey (Audiobook MP3-CD edition)

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Fifty Shames of Earl Grey (Fifty Shames #1)

by Andrew Shaffer (Goodreads Author), Fanny Merkin, Allyson Ryan (Narrator)

3.36 of 5 stars 3.36 · rating details · 1,431 ratings · 496 reviews

Young, arrogant tycoon Earl Grey seduces the naïve coed Anna Steal with his overpowering good looks and staggering amounts of money, but will she be able to get past his fifty shames, including shopping at Walmart on Saturdays, bondage with handcuffs, and his love of BDSM (Bards, Dragons, Sorcery, and Magick)? Or will his dark secrets and constant smirking drive her over t...more

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Published July 10th 2012 by Tantor Media

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Jul 06, 2012 Jill rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: contemporary-romance

If you haven't heard of Fifty Shades of Grey it means that you've been off-planet for the last six months or so. Never having read FSoG I had no problem whatsoever getting the jokes in this parody. I know enough about the plot and characters and its ah, 'famous' scenes from reviews and chats to get this spoof. And Fifty Shames of Earl Grey is hilarious.

From the cover depicting Earl Grey with a cup of earl grey (note the gesture of the hand holding the cup) to the author's aka Fanny Merkin (view ...more

28 likes · like · see review

Jul 03, 2012 Misfit rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: net-galley

I'm guessing most folks know the basics of The Fifty Shades of Grey books, originally written as fan-fiction of the Twilight series: mousy Bella and control-freak Edward got a new setting and a hot sex life. Fifty Shades was eventually picked up by ~~money-grubbing~~ publishers, publishers who supposedly edited it, and history was made, although after reading it for myself, I'm reminded of The Emperor's New Clothes. Does everyone love these ~~badly written~~ books because the hype says they're supposed...more

66 likes · like · see review

Mar 19, 2013 Traveller rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: [P] and Manny

Oh, dwarling..*

I get up and look in the mirror. My hair ...- oh, my hair! It's... really naughty hair. It insists on going in all directions while I sleep. So, I say a mantra every night: "Must flatten hair...must..."

..but it never works. I say it anyway. Who knows, one morning I might wake up with flat hair. This is a very important thing in my life. To wake up with neat, flat hair.

I know today is going to be a very important day for me. It's the day I'm going to meet him.
I just don't know it y...more

46 likes · like · see review

Jul 28, 2012 new_user rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: EVERYONE

Shelves: humor

I won't count the embarrassing number of times I gabbled that Fifty Shames of Earl Grey was OMGhilarious, I'll just explain why Andrew Shaffer's- sorry, Fanny Merkin's struck five stars of comedic gold with his Fifty Shades of Grey parody.

Culturally relevant, cheeky, and absurd, Shames pokes fun at romance tropes, Anna and Christian, and EL James- a treat for romance readers who haven't seen a pop publication for them since Everything I Know About Love I Learned from Romance Novels. Shames's hum...more

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Jul 31, 2012 karen rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: continuations-n-retellings

i don't know if it is just because i read A Coupla Shades of Taupe: A Parody first and may have reached my supersaturation point with fifty shades of gray parodies, but this one was not as amusing to me as the other.

there is something almost too easy about it, the way it is really easy to write bad theatre d'absurd, you know. for example:

an attractive blonde behind the receptionist's desk smiles at me as i walk in. i assume she's the receptionist, because i can't think of any reason she would b...more

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Jun 30, 2012 Kruti rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: anyone who’s read the Fifty Shades trilogy

Shelves: for-review, adult, reviewed, humour

Kudos to Fanny Merkin aka Andrew Shaffer! I found myself laughing on every page.

I’ll be honest I usually shy away from parodies for the simple reason that good parodies are hard to come by. But this...Fifty Shames of Earl Grey manages to address all that I found utterly ridiculous in FSoG. It even steps it up a notch and mocks Twilight and the general legality of fan fiction. There’s even mention of 16 & pregnant, Snookie from Jersey Shore and Dr Drew. I swear this book should come with a w...more Kudos to Fanny Merkin aka Andrew Shaffer! I found myself laughing on every page.

I’ll be honest I usually shy away from parodies for the simple reason that good parodies are hard to come by. But this...Fifty Shames of Earl Grey manages to address all that I found utterly ridiculous in FSoG. It even steps it up a notch and mocks Twilight and the general legality of fan fiction. There’s even mention of 16 & pregnant, Snookie from Jersey Shore and Dr Drew. I swear this book should come with a warning label. WARNING: Not to be read in public places! Seriously, it pokes fun in all the right places and will have you laughing so often!

I’m not going to summarise the story for fear that I may accidentally spoil things for you. However, I will leave a few of my favourite quotes below. Do NOT click on the spoiler button if you haven’t read the book.

(view spoiler)

I received an ARC of this book from the publisher through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.(less)

19 likes · like · see review

Jul 10, 2012 Stacia ~ Mistress of Mediocrity rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: adult, made-me-laugh, super-cheese, romantica-or-erotica, contemporary-romance

Have you ever seen the preview for a movie which made you so excited to see it, only to find out when you watched the actual movie that the best parts were already shown in the preview? This is how I felt about Fifty Shames of Earl Grey. The 3 chapter sneak peak was extremely funny. Unfortunately, the humor started to wane the further I read. I have no clue how this concept will work as a trilogy.

Even though I enjoyed parts of the book, it's apparent that most early readers found Shames somewha...more Have you ever seen the preview for a movie which made you so excited to see it, only to find out when you watched the actual movie that the best parts were already shown in the preview? This is how I felt about Fifty Shames of Earl Grey. The 3 chapter sneak peak was extremely funny. Unfortunately, the humor started to wane the further I read. I have no clue how this concept will work as a trilogy.

Even though I enjoyed parts of the book, it's apparent that most early readers found Shames somewhat more entertaining than I did. The gay jokes got old fast and it seemed like some of the sexual vibe was removed in favor of playing up other pop-culture references (come on...there could have been SO much more comic gold squeezed out with the contract and the sex scenes, although I did absolutely love the bit with Earl pulling things out of Anna like he was a magician). I will give props to the writer for working in some Twilight references though, since Fifty was originally a Twi fanfic. I thought Jin's character was probably the most brilliantly sketched in the entire book, and it was fun to see more of a play on Jacob than what was shown with Jose in Fifty.

Honestly, I think Fifty Shames would have been much more amusing had it been condensed into a summarized version of highlights, instead of a full length novel. I found myself skimming by the halfway point and as I read this line, it made me nod my head in agreement : Pacing ourselves isn't such a bad idea, especially since we still have more than half the book left.

Some Highlights :

The receptionist hands me a security badge that says virgin. Is it that obvious? "How did you know -"
"That you're a first-time visitor here at the Earl Grey Corporation?"

I walk through the glass doors and into the lobby, which is floor-to-ceiling glass and steel. This fascinates me to no end, because buildings back in Portland are made of grass and mud.

"No man is an island," he says. "Islands are made of dirt and rocks and trees. I don't know any people made of such things. Therefore, people are not islands."
Wow. Was this hot guy a philosophy major in college?

When he's not in school or doing homework, Jin spends his free time reading and writing My Little Pony fanfic. He's deep into the "brony" scene.

"I'm a Dungeon Master, Anna."
What? My inner guidette screeches to a halt on her hamster wheel. I have no clue what he's talking about. "What exactly does a Dungeon Master do?"
"I'm into BDSM," he says.
"Is that a workout thing, like Zumba?"
"No, Anna. it's not anything like Zumba. BDSM is a live-action role-playing game : Bards, Dragons, Sorcery and Magick."

He lowers his gaze. "We need to talk about something," he says.
"The baby," I say.
He nods. "The baby is fine. But..."
A wave of relief floods over me. "But what?"
"I ran some tests, and your baby is a sadist. Just like his father."

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Jun 26, 2012 ♡KarLynP♡ rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: audiobook, arc-copy, genre-humor, 2012-07-july

This was a HILARIOUS parody of Fifty Shades of Grey, it nailed so much of the absurdity of that story!

In Fifty Shames of Earl Grey, Anna Steele is an airhead virgin college student who meets the bazillionaire stalker Earl Grey, and soon gets pulled into his sick and twisted world of BDSM - erotic role playing for Bards, Dragons, Sorcery and Magick.

This story pokes so much fun at all the whacked out parts of Fifty, including Ana's lip biting problem (now a nose picking problem that turns him on...more

34 likes · like · see review

Jul 15, 2012 Taryn at My Secret Romance rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: humor

This review was posted to My Secret Romance.

My inner guidette is screaming on the inside that I should get on my hands and knees and kiss the ground this dreamy man walks on for this laugh out loud book! Oh, Fanny!

But then I put things into perspective and think- I don’t even know what kind of shoes he wears.

For those of you who come across this book and don't know what it is, it's a spoof of Fifty Shades of Grey and a little of Twilight. It's also A MUST READ….if you have a sense of humor!

Fift...more
This review was posted to My Secret Romance.

My inner guidette is screaming on the inside that I should get on my hands and knees and kiss the ground this dreamy man walks on for this laugh out loud book! Oh, Fanny!

But then I put things into perspective and think- I don’t even know what kind of shoes he wears.

For those of you who come across this book and don't know what it is, it's a spoof of Fifty Shades of Grey and a little of Twilight. It's also A MUST READ….if you have a sense of humor!

Fifty Shames of Earl Grey is absolutely comical! The references between Fifty Shades and Twilight made my stomach hurt from laughing so hard. Andrew Shaffer nailed it on the head with this book. At times one sentence would have me nearly in tears!

I'm not going to go into a full detailed review for this book. It's clearly obvious what the story line is. However, what gets me is the way Andrew Shaffer really punctuates the details of the Fifty Shades book in this book. From the clothes the characters wear to their vocabulary and the little innuendos made were spot on. This man didn’t miss a beat! If only this was made into one of those spoof movies…..then I would be the first one in line!

Two problems I think readers will have with this book. One, if they haven't read the Fifty Shades books then they're not going to understand the humor in this. They will be utterly clueless and it will make no sense whatsoever to them. So if you haven't read the Fifty books then I wouldn't recommend reading this. You won’t get the full impact if you haven’t. And two, I think people are going to find Fifty Shames of Earl Grey insulting to E.L. James. To me this is just a harmless humor to me, but I have a feeling it won’t be for most. I think fans are going to take offense to this book.

I personally thought this book was BRILLIANT! Just Brilliant! At the end, Andrew thanks Stephanie Meyer for inspiring him to write this book. I thought that was the icing on the cake! I hope Andrew does more parodies in the future. By the way, I'm a Fifty fan and didn't take this to be insulting. But then again I like a little harmless humor, so….

Favorite quotes-

How about the entire book?
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Nov 08, 2012 Amanda The Book Slayer rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: parody

4.5 Stars!

Recommendation : This book is for anyone who enjoys laughing. If you have read or heard about ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ you will want to read this parody no matter if you loved or hated it.

Like Earl Grey, I must confess one of my many shames. I have had this ARC copy since June, I believe. I started reading it then and loved it. However, I think I put it down for an ARC that I had been waiting for. It wasn’t Earl’s fault, just that well… his many shames caught up with my many shames and...more

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May 01, 2013 Anushka rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: 50 Shades and Twilight haters

Shelves: bitchin, ebook, holy-cow-that-was-awesome, me-likey, surprisingly-good

One word: Hilarious

If you've read 50 Fifty Shades of Grey you will enjoy this thoroughly and if you haven't, good for you. Don't ever do that mistake.
But now I think finally all my sufferings that I went through have paid off, this one was an absolute gem. There was never a dull moment in this book and for a parody, it was fairly well written.

I really loved it when Twilight was also roped in while making a spoof, being an avid hater of both Stephenie Meyer and E.L. James, this book was a l...more

4 likes · like · see review

Jul 06, 2012 Sandra rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: anyone who needs a good laugh

Shelves: contemporary, clueless-heroines, dipshit-heroes, arc-netgalley, giggle-snorts, snarky-snark-sarcasm, satire, parodies, humor, made-of-win, must-read, reviewed-on-blog, authors-that-rock

The review can also be found on my blog.

This satiric, snarky, sarcastic, over the top story based on the mega-bestselling Fifty Shades of ~~Twilight~~ Grey nails all the key points of absurdity of the book it parodies, as well as the Twilight saga from which it came. And then some.

The cover alone is hilarious, especially the hand holding the cup with the pointer, middle and pinkie finger extended. If you don't know what that hand gesture means, please look it up under "shocker" on Urbandictionary.c...more

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Jul 20, 2012 Letitia rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: edelweiss, kindle, netgalley

Rating: B ... Heat: Warm (although, really, none if it is actually sexy…)

In order to fully enjoy and appreciate this book, I think it's neccessary to at least be somewhat familiar with the book it's parodying. If, like me, you couldn't get past the first few chapters of said book - go ahead and read this review. It contains everything you'll need to know.

For instance, the original's (I’m using that term loosely…) main character refers to the voice inside her head as her "inner goddess" - eye rol...more

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Sep 03, 2012 Lexxie (un)Conventional Bookviews rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: all lovers of snark and fun, and readers who like to laugh out loud while reading

Shelves: netgalley, read-in-2012

*Copy received via Netgalley on July 3rd 2012*

This and other reviews can be found on my blog (un)Conventional Bookviews

I read the first couple of chapters when they were on Shaffer's blog, and I found the writing to be hilarious!

This whole book is fan-fricking-tastic. The snark goes from win to win, and I couldn't read more than a few sentences at a time without laughing (sometimes, it was every single sentence).

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Jun 01, 2012 Sandy rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY –a parody by Fanny Merkin (aka Andrew Shaffer)

***SPOILER ALERT--BIG TIME***

FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY is a parody based on the Fifty Shades trilogy by E L James. Following a similar storyline to the original novel, we are entertained with the knowledge that when all is said and done, we can laugh at ourselves and, of course, others. Fanny Merkin (aka Andrew Shaffer) writes with plenty of humor, but unless you have read the Fifty Shades Trilogy, some of the humor will be...more FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY –a parody by Fanny Merkin (aka Andrew Shaffer)

***SPOILER ALERT--BIG TIME***

FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY is a parody based on the Fifty Shades trilogy by E L James. Following a similar storyline to the original novel, we are entertained with the knowledge that when all is said and done, we can laugh at ourselves and, of course, others. Fanny Merkin (aka Andrew Shaffer) writes with plenty of humor, but unless you have read the Fifty Shades Trilogy, some of the humor will be lost. I would suggest a thorough read of the Fifty Shades Trilogy before embarking on the copious quantity of parody novels. I found myself laughing in several spots, if for no other reason, than the comparisons to the original storyline. Remember how Ana likes to bite her lower lip? Well, her little fetish in Fifty Shames is shameful indeed and one that should NOT turn anyone on, but apparently Earl Grey has many shames. (you can find ALL 50 shames listed at the back of the book).

The main characters are still present and vaguely disguised. Anna Steal is the virgin heroine who first agrees to conduct the interview with Earl Grey on behalf of her BFF-the now 38 year old perpetually drunk and stoned Kathleen: Jin as her long suffering male friend Jose, who is no longer a photographer but promotes a website for men who love MY LITTLE PONY (Brony-brothers for ponies) and of course, Earl Grey-the billionaire corporate mogul who likes to partake in a game of Dungeon Masters and practices BDSM-Bards, Dragons, Sorcery and Magick. (insert giggle here). Oh and watch out for Earl’s affinity to role playing-he takes the faery tale to a whole new level!! Christian/Earl's need to protect Ana/Anna at all costs will find him purchasing a series of well known retailers and educational institutes-all in the name of -obsession. Maybe Anna should quit while she is still ahead!! Remember the obsession with food?-there are plenty of passages that involve food and the play by play as the couple engages in eating a banquet of food, will have you thinking about many sitcoms on late night TV.

We meet Anna’s mother and her 6th husband, both who are practicing nudists, and never wear clothing no matter what the occasion. But there is a twist to Earl Grey’s storyline surrounding his mother-apparently she wasn’t a drug addict as first explored, but there is an addiction none-the-less. And look, she is still alive-just like Elvis-but maybe not for long. As for some of the storyline premise, the Charlie Tango incident combines with the final scene where we find Ana on the warehouse floor after the extortion plot, and of course, fans of Twilight will liken some of the hospital scene to Bella and Edward’s storyline.

Fanny Merkin (aka Andrew Shaffer) and yes, I am still not sure who is the actual author (Andrew-I think) or the pseudonym, likens many of Earl’s characteristics to Edward Cullen (yes Carmen, I said Edward). When Earl first meets Anna he introduces himself as Edward Cullen, but as the storyline nears the end, there are more similarities to the Twilight saga. And look, is Earl Grey sparkling in the sunlight? Wait til you follow Anna’s pregnancy and meet their newborn baby Chris.

Overall, FIFTY SHAMES OF EARL GREY is strictly a parody. Not to be taken seriously, but a humorous look at a $1,000,000 ( or perhaps billion by now) selling trilogy that many people cannot fathom as to why. The media has aided the promotion of the Fifty Shades phenomenon but labeling the novels ‘mommy porn’ (which in my opinion, it is a far cry from porn or even erotica) and the humorous renditions and skits (ala Saturday Night Live) will continue to keep E L James on the number one best sellers lists. Many critics and reviewers have attacked the content and quality of Fifty Shades et al, but no one ever said it would win a Pulitzer. And like many of those who have never read the trilogy by E L James, but still have an opinion, well everyone is entitled to an opinion, even if they should not. ;) Fifty Shames takes a light-hearted look at a number one seller and if you have read the original series, you cannot help but laugh out loud during some of the more popular scenes and passages.

see all of my reviews at : thereadingcafe.com(less)

8 likes · like · see review

Jul 11, 2012 Ren marked it as to-read · review of another edition

Shelves: humor, arc-netgalley

UPDATE : The publisher just accept my request via netgalley! Oh,yeah!!

Oh, LOLOLOLOL!!!
Maybe I'll read this first, then read Fifty Shades of Grey.
Just to entertain myself #smirk

5 likes · like · see review

Sep 03, 2012 Jay rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: xxx-adults-only

Ladies – forget Christian Grey, prepare to meet Earl Grey!!

Earl is the 27yo multi-billionaire CEO of The Earl Grey Corporation and “HOLY MOTHER EFFING SPARKLY VAMPIRES IS HE HOT”. His life is a daily struggle with his Fifty Shames, but who can resist a man in a shiny silver g-string and hot pink Crocs. Complete the package that is Earl Grey with his love (or shames) of BDSM (Bards, Dragons, Sorcery, and Magick), mournful tambourine playing, and a serious man-crush on Tom Cruise.

Anna Steal is a 2...more

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Oct 29, 2012 archdandy rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: adult, pure-awesomeness, lolz

I received a copy of this from NetGalley for an honest review.

So by now we all know that Fifty Shades of Grey was written as a Twilight fanfic and then re-arranged to sell to the masses as a different story. I think that Shaffer does a great job of blending the ridiculousness of the actual writing and story with the ridiculousness of how the story came to be. He single-handedly made fun of the horrible writing and the author herself.

I have not read Fifty Shades of Grey and I never will. So wit...more

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Jun 13, 2012 Sherry rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

I laughed, I cried, and I peed my pants a little. I've read only the original "Twilight" book -- none of its sequels nor a word of the "Fifty Shades of Grey" trilogy -- but Andrew Shaffer's parody had me in hysterics in public places. It reads like a "Naked Gun" movie.

9 likes · like · see review

Jul 13, 2012 Connie rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: arc-galley, humor

it gets 5* because I literally LOL with the whole thing!
Twilight, Master of the Universe and 50 Shades mash up it totally had me in tears.
The Twilight references were hilarious.
And the whole 50 SHAMES, the final list OMG.
I'm not sure I can read it as a real book, I just enjoyed the geniality of the author to take the most ridiculous perks from 50 Shades and turn them into comedy.
I will add a few quotes later one because they totally deserve to be mention, but if you get the chance to read it...e...more

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Aug 04, 2012 Suleikha Snyder rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This book should come with a warning for asthmatics, those with heart trouble, or those prone to public fits of hysteria. Andrew Shaffer lampoons the juggernaut phenomenon of Fifty Shades of Grey with wit that quickly skyrockets to a level of absurdity that might actually land you in the hospital with a laughter-induced hernia. Filthy, profane and hilarious, Fifty Shames won't inspire shame in its readers... just a lot of guffawing and face-palming.

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Jun 25, 2012 AH rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: humor, arc-netgalley, read-jun-2012

I’m still laughing… Ms. Merkin aka Andrew Shaffer has nailed it! Her parody of that other book is hilarious! Fifty Shames of Grey captures the essence of the two main characters very well. ~~Edward~~ ~~Christian~~ Earl Grey is rich, powerful, and a Dungeon Master! Yup – he’s a master of live action role playing. His type of BSDM involves bards, dragons, sorcery, and magick. Complete with the prosthetic ears!

~~Bella~~ ~~Ana~~ Anna Steal is her usual klutzy, clueless self. She even has an Inner Guidette doing ba...more

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Jul 10, 2012 Julia rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Recommended to Julia by: NetGalley

Shelves: 2012, comedy, emoted, netgalley

I have never read 50 Shades. I've heard a lot about it and realized quite quickly through some snippets that this was not a book for me. That said, I am sort of obsessed with the phenomenon of FSoG and have read a few reviews, followed a lot of romance community's opinion and listened to one hilarious podcast. Knowing how much I enjoyed the tongue in cheek podcast, I knew 50 Shames of Earl Grey was right up my alley. It did not disappoint.

There were quite a few instances of me being afraid of d...more

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Dec 15, 2012 Chris rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: lust-romance

Who doesn't love hot Earl Grey? It makes everything else seem inferior.

Excuse me for a moment.

There, I put the kettle on. What did you think I was doing?

I truly needed a laugh, and this book (which I brought because of Misfit's review and the author's comment on a dicussion) provided it. In order to enjoy it, you don't need to have read Twilight or Fifty Shades of Grey, just have a passing knowledge of both as well as the urban fantasy romantic trend that gave birth to them. The book isn't mean...more

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Sep 30, 2012 Kristina rated it 2 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: brain-candy, fiction, my-book, humor

The whole point of a parody is that it should be funnier than the book it is parodying! While Andrew Shaffer does have some good stuff in this book, it is mostly (well, all) at the beginning: Anna's bemusement at Seattle having elevators and buildings made of steel and glass because Portland is a settlement of mud and grass huts--that is funny. But as Fifty Shames of Earl Grey continues, it is more ridiculous and less funny. That's disappointing. I can sympathize with him a bit because the origi...more The whole point of a parody is that it should be funnier than the book it is parodying! While Andrew Shaffer does have some good stuff in this book, it is mostly (well, all) at the beginning: Anna's bemusement at Seattle having elevators and buildings made of steel and glass because Portland is a settlement of mud and grass huts--that is funny. But as Fifty Shames of Earl Grey continues, it is more ridiculous and less funny. That's disappointing. I can sympathize with him a bit because the original book is so ridiculous, it must have been difficult to write a parody that took the craziness to a new level. However, because the original is ripe for a parody--it begs to be parodied--I think he could have done a much better job. For example, Ana's mysterious muscles clenching deep in her belly--how could Shaffer not have parodied that? He misses most of the aspects of the original novel that I find so amusing/horrifyingly bad:
1. mysterious clenching muscles
2. Ana being American but speaking like a Brit
3. the overuse of idiotic exclamations (holy X! and jeez!)
4. the author's propensity to pepper the book with words she doesn't know the meanings of
5. the disconnect between the silliness of the characters and their oddly formal, awkward way of speaking
6. The book (and Ana) taking itself so seriously/no sense of humor whatsoever
7. Ana's profound innocence of anything vaguely sexual, bordering on extreme stupidity (and totally unbelievable)

The author did parody the lip-biting fetish as a nose-picking fetish but it isn't a running gag through the novel (only mentioned maybe four or five times) and it isn't that funny. Mostly it's kind of gross. He also makes fun of the sex scenes and I found that mildly amusing, but overall this parody wasn't all that funny. The book is so over the top (Earl Grey employs a billion people, he drains the Pacific Ocean to save them when they crash into it, etc.) that I found it annoying. It isn't necessary to try that hard. Plus Earl Grey's personality is all over the place. He is supposedly into BDSM (Bards, Dragons, Sorcery, and Magick)and that is funny, but the author didn't get all the humor out of that that he could have. Instead of having, say, a character from Lord of the Rings as his butler, Data (Star Trek Next Generation for you non-Trekkies) is. Let's not muddy the genre waters. Sci-fi is not fantasy. I like both genres, but let's not ridicule Data (or Brent Spiner).

Overall, it is meh. I liked Earl's shameful fixation on Tom Cruise and all things Tom Cruise-related (Top Gun plane and music--tee hee) and the helicopter ride from Wal-Mart to Starbucks (which is across the street) and Anna's complete ignorance of anything pre-this year (music, tv shows, movies, technology) and I completely agree with her assessment of Starbuck's coffee (it does taste like burnt ass), but the book is disappointing. It has a gold mine of original material to work with, but doesn't use much of it. The description on the back cover of the book calls this parody "shrewd." I totally disagree. 50 Shades of Grey is so bad that shrewdness is not required to recognize the book was written to be parodied, nor does it take shrewdness to write the parody. If anything, it takes a lot of self-control to not parody every idiotic sentence in the book. I found the original book much more amusing than this parody. I have even found reviews written about the original book and this parody more amusing. But I'm fairly difficult to please. If you can get your hands on a copy of Fifty Shames of Earl Grey for free, do so. Don't pay for it unless you have $15 in your pocket and no other plans for it.
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Jun 23, 2012 Cyndy Aleo rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: arc, netgalley, favorites

While I may request a fair amount of titles from NetGalley, there are few review copies for which I keep refreshing my email, hoping for approval. Andrew Shaffer/Fanny Merkin's Fifty Shames of Earl Grey was one of those titles. I'd read the three sample chapters Shaffer had posted earlier on his blog as "Fifty-One Shames" and I was eager to see if the wit he'd demonstrated in those early chapters could be sustained over the entirely of a book.

Ostensibly, Fifty Shames of Earl Grey is a parody...more

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Jul 08, 2012 Anzu The Great Destroyer rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: Fifty Shades/Twilight haters

Recommended to Anzu by: My hate

Shelves: excitement, arc-galley, oh-you-so-funny, cheesetacular, dafuq-did-i-just-read, lust-at-first-sight, mary-sue, second-best, good-guy-greg, reviewed-2012, romance-contemp

It all starts with a story of a lonely girl moving to a cold rainy town. She’s supposed to be with her dad, whom she doesn’t really like. She’s a shy girl, doesn’t have any friends or any boobs. Her new truck looks like a drunken lobster, and her school seems like a prison full of weird country kids. It all seems to lead her towards suicide until one day when she sees the most perfect being in the universe. He is the Master of the Universe. Lots of teenage angst filled pages later they kiss and...more

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Dec 16, 2012 Amelia rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

OOOOH EARL GREY what do i do with you?! this is seriously the funniest parody book i've ever read. It's original and LOL funny. I found this amazing because im a fan of 50 shades trilogy and im surprised that im in love with earl grey too maybe because of those long sexy talented fingers HAHA i'll never look at tambourine and elf the same way ever again. This is the only book that combined (view spoiler)...more

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Oct 05, 2012 Alison rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Superbly written, terribly funny, surprisingly sexy.
It doesn't matter if you love Fifty Shades of Grey or if you hated Fifty Shades of Grey, this is a must read!

You've heard about "the" semi-erotic novel "Fifty Shades Of Grey”, you may have read it, or you may have just read the first chapter and laughed about it. Fifty Shames of Earl Grey takes all that is amusing from that book, and turns it into a wonderfully, well written, and very clever parody that will have you in stitches.

I confess, I co...more Superbly written, terribly funny, surprisingly sexy.
It doesn't matter if you love Fifty Shades of Grey or if you hated Fifty Shades of Grey, this is a must read!

You've heard about "the" semi-erotic novel "Fifty Shades Of Grey”, you may have read it, or you may have just read the first chapter and laughed about it. Fifty Shames of Earl Grey takes all that is amusing from that book, and turns it into a wonderfully, well written, and very clever parody that will have you in stitches.

I confess, I couldn't finish the EL James novel. Yes, I understand why it's so terribly popular, but contrary to those just discovering it, erotica is not new (although I agree, packaging it such a mundane and able to be shown in public cover certainly is). Romance is also not a new thing. There is reason to be excited by the number of women who've started reading again, and taken charge of their own sexuality and enjoyment because of the series.

None of that distracts from my absolute adoration of Fanny Merkins’ clever mocking of the bloated fan-fiction.

In this book we have sarcastic, naive klutz, Anna Steal, meeting multimillionaire, kinkmeister, Earl Grey. Mr Gray has fifty very shameful secrets, very shameful. Virginal Anna needs to know if she can accept that side of Earl.

From start to finish I couldn't stop smiling, when I wasn’t laughing out loud and scaring those around me with my sudden outbursts.

The story is very well written, with a smooth flow, great comedic timing, and a great portrayal of this sexually naive college grad, and a successful business man with emotional issues. Although a parody that pokes fun at the EL James book, it also doesn't take itself at all seriously, and it is this light-hearted mocking that will probably mean it will appeal to those that enjoyed the EL James trilogy, as well as those that loathed it (or never read further than the chapter sample).

The contrast of Anna's apparent innocence, with the stories that she comes out with is just wonderful. She's sweet and innocent, works hard, studies hard, but may possibly have been on ‘shrooms at some stage.

Some of the aspects of the fifty shades novel have been picked up and torn apart, some have stayed in, and Ms Merkin has taken liberal license to create her own slant on this world made popular by EL James and Stephanie Myers.

Definitely a book to read and definitely a keeper; if you ever need a quick pick up up after a long, hard week... This is the book for you.

Sexy, funny, silly...but very well written.
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Jul 30, 2012 Angela Carr rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: read-in-2012

Review also posted at Under The Covers Book Blog

INTERVIEW OF EARL AND AUTHOR ANDREW SHAFFER: Under The Covers Book Blog

This is my first read from Fanny Merkin AKA Andrew Shaffer and my first parody book. I must say it was definitely entertaining and a great fun book to read.

Mr. Shaffer had written a wonderful parody of Fifty Shades series, if you did not already know. It covered most memorable points of the original story. From the airhead heroine and her “inner guidette”, the bazillionaire h...more

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About Andrew Shaffer

Andrew Shaffer is the author of the nonfiction books "Great Philosophers Who Failed at Love" and "Literary Rogues." Under the pen name "Fanny Merkin," he authored the Fifty Shades parody "Fifty Shames of Earl Grey."

His writing has appeared in such diverse publications as Mental Floss and Maxim. He reviews romance, erotica, and women's fiction for RT Book Reviews magazine. He is also the creative d...more

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Fifty-one Shades: A Parody (First Three Chapters)

Literary Rogues: A Scandalous History of Wayward Authors

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Quotes from Fifty Shames of Earl Grey

“My god, Anna,” he says. “I almost lost you.” He has me in his powerful grip. I’ve never felt this safe before.
“Never let go,” I say, looking into his beautiful gray eyes.
“That could be problematic,” he says. “I’ll have to let you go at some point. What if I have to pee? What if you have to pee?”
“I don’t care,” I say.
“What if I have an important business meeting and I’m holding you and we’re both covered in urine?”
I start to cry. “You’re right,” I say, turning my face away from his gaze. “Nothing lasts forever.” — 16 people liked it

“I growl with frustration at my reflection in the mirror. My hair is fifty shades messed up. Why is it so kinky and out of control? I need to stop sleeping with it wet. As I brush my long brown hair, the girl in the mirror with the brown eyes too big for her head stares back at me. Wait... my eyes are blue! It dawns on me that I've been staring at a poster of Kristen Stewart for five minutes. My own hair is fine.” — 12 people liked it

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Fifty Shames of Earl Grey (Fifty Shames #1)

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