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Getting Even

4.01  ·  Rating Details ·  4,849 Ratings  ·  194 Reviews
After three decades of prodigious film work & some unfortunate tabloid adventures, it's easy to forget that Woody Allen began his career as one heck of a great comedy writer. Getting Even, a collection of his late '60s magazine pieces, offers a look into Allen's bag of shtick, back when it was new. From the supposed memoirs of Hitler's barber: "Then, in January of '45, ...more
Published by Audible, Inc. (first published 1966)
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Fahd It's just adding a german or maybe austrian accent to the character's way of speaking - It would just mean "And Mama and I laughed at it."
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Paquita Maria Sanchez
I dedicate this review to my friend David Vicsotka. Here is a man that LOVES engaging in those early-in-the-dating-process, sprawling conversations about art, literature, and film that either A) get you laid, and ideally lead to further discussions concerning the wonders of the creative process coupled with additional sexual encounters or B) lead to awkward conversations, reconsideration of sexual interest, fears that this person is a boorish dumb-ass, fears within that potential dumb-ass that y ...more
Oct 11, 2010 Mariel rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Hermit the frog
Recommended to Mariel by: Gonzo style
Review #1: The Lists

I would do a list of my favorite Woody Allen films but I've already done so elsewhere on goodreads. I know it happened in 2003 (or maybe it was 2004. I remember the pain if not the exact date) that these asshole Wes Anderson fans made fun of me for having such a long list of favorite Woody Allen films.

Times that Wes Anderson made me look like an idiot:
1. His stupid fans ganged up on me for having a long list of favorite films. Okay, if my favorite filmmaker was Wes Anderson m
Mohammad Ali

نمره ی واقعی: 2.5

نیمه ی اول کتاب پر از تکه های خنده دار و جذاب بود اما در نیمه ی دوم به ندرت چیز خاصی پیدا می شد. اگر کل کتاب مثل نیمه ی اولش بود سه ستاره واقعا حقش بود. همچنان مشکلات در تلفظ اسامی وجود داشت - چیزی که نشان از ویراستاری ضعیف یا نامطلعه

این کتاب رو بیشتر از "عوارض جانبی 1" خنده دار یافتم. یعنی کتاب زیر
عوارض جانبی 1 by Woody Allen

بخش هایی که جذاب تر یافتمشان، "لیست های لباسشویی مترلینگ"، "خاطرات اشمیت"، "بله، اما آیا ماشین بخار قادر است این کار را بکند؟" و "افسانه های حسیدیک" ( به جز آخریش ) بودند
Apr 26, 2009 Punk rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Punk by: Sab
Shelves: short-stories
Humor. These absurd little pieces read like they were written by a computer program that learned to write from Mad Libs. The humor is completely random and utterly dry. The stories aren't laugh-out-loud funny -- they're more likely to surprise an admiring snort out of you -- but they are funny (if sometimes funny-strange), crafted with skill and fearlessness (comedy: the one thing Woody Allen isn't afraid of?).

Some favorites: "The Schmeed Memoirs" - Hitler's barber; "Death Knocks" - Death plays
Jul 18, 2013 Amene rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2013
(وودی آلن)"فرقی نداره توی کدوم گروه باشی ، قطعا توی اون یکی گروه بیشتر خوش می گذره"
وودی از نوابغه بازهم میگم شک نکنین!
این کتاب در فارسی دو تا ترجمه داره یکی کنت دراکولا و داستان های دیگر و ترجمه ی دیگر که ترجمه نگار شاطریان است با نام "حالا بی حساب شدیم"نمی دونم توی ترجمه دیگر هم این مقدار حذفیات و سه نقطه داخل کروشه که نشانه ی سانسور هست وجود دارد یا نه. ولی با تمام این احوالات این هم یکی دیگر از کارهای معرکه ی وودی آلن نابغه ی دوران ما بود خصوصا دو داستان "عقاید فلسفی من"و"اطلاعیه های بهاری"
Jeff Crompton
Aug 05, 2012 Jeff Crompton rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I picked this one off the shelves a couple of days ago. I've read it a couple of times over the years, but not recently. This time, more than ever, it struck me as brilliant. The humor is a mixture of the intellectual and the ridiculous, and that mixture appeals to me strongly. I particularly enjoyed the final piece, "Mr. Big," which reads like something Mickey Spillane would have written if he had been a philosophy major.
Rosa Ramôa
Jan 09, 2015 Rosa Ramôa rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Sim, mas a máquina de vapor é capaz de fazer isto?
Podemos fazer uma reflexão filosófica.Podemos ver nisso uma
interpretação do distinto erudito.Boletim da Primavera?
Podemos acabar de vez com a cultura?Será a morte que chama ou é a minha filosofia?
Num dia normal na vida do lendário Conde Drácula que espera pelo anoitecer para não levar com os raios de sol que certamente o matariam. Cai a escuridão.Drácula sai.Tratava de um eclipse.
E ainda:
-As listas de Metterling
-Uma vista de olhos pelo cri
É cómico, absurdo, bastante irónico e sarcástico, apesar de eu ter cabeceado algumas vezes a lê-lo, mas pronto, estava cansada e cheia de sono. Ando a reler Contos do Gin-Tonic e não posso deixar de notar algumas semelhanças. O Woody também tem o seu quê de surreal. Enfim, um clássico incontornável que eu mais tarde ou mais cedo havia de ler. Next.
Jane Stewart
Apr 13, 2014 Jane Stewart rated it liked it
This was ok, but I didn’t smile as much as I hoped. My mind wandered at times.

I like his quirky mind. Woody Allen was ok as narrator of the audiobook.

Narrative mode: mostly 3rd person. Unabridged audiobook length: 2 hrs and 43 mins. Swearing language: Jesus used once or twice. Sexual content: nothing explicit. Book copyright: 1971. Genre: humorous thoughts.
Ivan Damjanović
Priličan sam ljubitelj Allenovih filmova (nekih više, nekih manje*, kao, uostalom, i tekstova iz ove zbirke), a ovo je prvi njegov tiskani uradak kojeg sam se dohvatio. Tradicionalno najuočljivija tekstualna struktura, naslov knjige, veliki je upitnik ovdje. Ne uočavam nikakvu vezu između „Getting Even“ / „Milo za drago“ i dotičnih tekstova. (Ni na netu nisam našao razjašnjenje, ali nije da sam se ubio tražeći). Uglavnom, ova kompilacija objavljena ’71. na mahove vrlo zabavno parodira biografski ...more
Aug 12, 2012 Fernanda rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Hacía tiempo que no releía algo, pero es que realmente necesitaba hacerlo.

Es la clase de libros que sólo alguien acostumbrado a su manera de escribir, de su clase de chistes y su humor snob-intelectual, puede disfrutar. De otro modo puede verse como un montón de palabras pegadas y lanzadas al azar. Sin mencionar que los contenidos culturales que poseen son de alto calibre y sin tener un conocimiento previo, al menos de nombres, puede volverse algo tedioso o confuso, o idiota. Lo que más les gus
Nov 16, 2008 Tony rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: essays
Allen, Woody. GETTING EVEN. (1971). ****1/2. This was the first collection of Allen’s thoughts, essays, and phantasmagoria. Most of the pieces were first published in the New Yorker magazine, and are all stand-alone. This is the second time I have worked my way through this book, not realizing that time was passing, and all of a sudden finding I was at the end. On the way I have been entertained and amazed at the variety of Allen’s turgid imagination. Pieces like, “Death Knocks,” and A Little Lo ...more
Rich Meyer
Nov 25, 2011 Rich Meyer rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: read-in-2014
Woody Allen's three books are some of the funniest stuff I've ever read. I. thoroughly enjoyed them as a child, though I did spend a lot of time in the library looking up some of the more obscure references. This Take the Money and Run- and What's Up Tiger Lily-Allen, not the much more serious leaning director of Manhattan or Interiors.

Getting Even is the first collection and probably the most sublime of the three. Definitely worth a read for any fan of erudite comedy.
Jan 06, 2017 Cristhian rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Un recopilado de los textos humorísticos que Woody publicó en el New Yorker y la verdad son divertidos (no todos pero sí la gran mayoría).

Mis favoritos fueron los de Sándwich, Bergman y la Cultura.

It's a gem of a book.

A collection of hilarious and slightly jarring stories told from different view points including a philosophical detective investigating the death of god, a member of a revolutionary uprising in a south american republic...

Well worth a read.
Huseyn Bayramov
Freud və Tərəvəz <3
Mar 25, 2017 Remo rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: humor, ensayo, 1992, ficcion
Fantástico. Una colección de ensayos cortos sobre los más diversos temas (relacionados con la cultura) en los que el autor da rienda suelta a la vez a su intelecto y a su humor más absurdo. El de la partida de ajedrez por cartea me hizo llorar de la risa. Muy recomendable.
Jul 28, 2013 claire rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
honestly, i have no idea why such a small book took me so long to read. especially considering how much i enjoyed it. more than likely, i just didn't want it to end.

it's difficult to explain the magic of woody allen's writing. if you've seen a few of his films, then you will at least understand the nature of his humour - dry, witty and at times so sarcastic it almost comes across as sincerity.

this definitely translates into his short stories. it gives him the ability to take the most mundane (a
Kathy  Olivos
Aug 28, 2016 Kathy Olivos rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Este es el primer libro que leo de Woody Allen. Partamos por decir que soy fanática de sus películas, me encanta que estén llenas de referencias a la alta cultura y esa mirada cínica y existencialista de la vida que traspasa a sus guiones. Respecto al libro, pasó a ocupar el primer lugar de los textos que más me han hecho reír (seguido por Filosofía Política del Poder Mediático, y luego quizás vendría La Maravillosa Vida breve de Oscar Wao).

Son una serie de ensayos y relatos sobre temas complej
Jul 16, 2016 Downward rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
this is my favorite of woody allen's short collections. the stories here are longer and go deeper into their premises while sacrificing none of the line-by-line jokes. it's the same sort of clever that all his other stuff is: exploring the neuroses of the intelligentsia as it relates to sex, death, and genre. there's a tremendous bit here where a colleg student hires a detective to find a missing God for her, because if she proves God exists she'll get an A for the semester, written in a very cr ...more
Dec 29, 2008 Carl rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
The best of a brilliant trio of Woody Allen's books -- this is humor writing at its best, most literate, most intelligent. When I was looking up the difference between "heuristics" and "hermeneutics" I realized how deep I was. This is probably the funniest volume of anything I have ever read. I can admit that he's got a formula that sometimes falls flat, but pieces like "The Gossage-Vardebedian Papers" and "Viva Vargas!" hit the perfect notes at the perfect pace.
Kristy Madden
Sep 01, 2016 Kristy Madden rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I'm a huge fan of Woody Allen's work and really enjoyed this book. I especially loved his riffs on philosophy which is so clever and hilarious to anyone who has studied it. I read the audiobook version which I highly recommend since Mr. Allen reads it himself in his inimical style. This book is so funny, I laughed aloud repeatedly.
Dec 03, 2015 Kirby rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2015
Wow. Woody Allen is completely not funny. I picked it up on recommendation of someone online, and after skipping the end of the first not-funny essay, I jumped around the rest of the book looking for something amusing. Nope.

He's hailed as a comic genius, but it's not my style. I just couldn't get into anything he wrote. Jokes just dragged on and on.

Dan Walsh
Aug 22, 2013 Dan Walsh rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
The humour in this book has dated worse than my sister.
Just not for me.

I don't believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- "Conversations with Helmholtz"
Dec 09, 2015 Karen rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Todos los libros de Woody Allen son el mismo libro de Woody Allen. Perhaps I've had enough.
Leo Robertson
Aug 09, 2015 Leo Robertson rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
The absurd whimsy continues...
Ignacio Izquierdo
Creo recordar que antes de ver ninguna de sus películas, mi primer contacto con Woody Allen fue a través de un libro suyo: "Sin plumas". Probablemente el libro con el que más me he reído en toda mi vida, una demostración de ingenio y sobre todo unas dosis muy elevadas de absurdo. Quizás fuera también el momento en que más disfrutaba del absurdo. "Como acabar de una vez por todas con la cultura" sigue la misma línea, una recopilación de los artículos que escribía para The New Yorker en los que si ...more
Mar 12, 2017 Phillip rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I think this is pretty skippable -- I did laugh in a few places, but I think most of these short pieces are an intellectual, comic exercise in writing. Most of it is philosophical setups, but there is some actual wordplay and slapstick to make them interesting and funny. But, for the most part, definitely not in the recommend pile if you're looking for a real laugh.
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Which story was your favorite? 2 14 Dec 29, 2013 08:44AM  
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Heywood "Woody" Allen (born Allan Stewart Konigsberg) is a three-time Academy Award-winning American film director, writer, actor, jazz musician, comedian and playwright. His large body of work and cerebral film style, mixing satire, wit and humor, have made him one of the most respected and prolific filmmakers in the modern era. Allen writes and directs his movies and has also acted in the majori ...more
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“She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak.” 30 likes
“These modern analysts! They charge so much. In my day, for five marks Freud himself would treat you. For ten marks, he would treat you and press your pants. For fifteen marks, Freud would let you treat him, and that included a choice of any two vegetables. Thirty dollars an hour! Fifty dollars an hour! The Kaiser only got twelve and a quarter for being Kaiser! And he had to walk to work! And the length of treatment! Two years! Five years! If one of us couldn’t cure a patient in six months we would refund his money, take him to any musical revue and he would receive either a mahogany fruit bowl or a set of stainless steel carving knives. I remember you could always tell the patients Jung failed with, as he would give them large stuffed pandas.” 13 likes
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