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Josie Griffin is Not a Vampire

3.24 of 5 stars 3.24 · rating details · 54 ratings · 14 reviews

A hilarious take on the paranormal trend--Twilight meets The Breakfast Club!

When former good girl turned rebel Josie Griffin gets busted for what was in her mind perfectly acceptable revenge on her cheating dog of a boyfriend, she lands herself in anger management therapy. It could be worse: it could be juvvie, or she could be a zombie cheerleader like the rest of her form...more

Paperback, 272 pages

Published September 13th 2012 by Speak

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Sep 23, 2012 Brandi rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: demons, faeries, paranormal, vampire

The review will begin in a few short sentences, but first I wanted to take the time to appropriately appreciate this cover. It is an odd little thing in a sea of covers and I just look at it and laugh. It is absolutely awesome.

Onto the actual book. After reading the synopsis of Josie Griffin Is Not a Vampire and being lured in by the quirky cover I just had to buy the book. Josie is a character I could see myself being friends with. She was spurned by her boyfriend and reacts like many girls wou...more The review will begin in a few short sentences, but first I wanted to take the time to appropriately appreciate this cover. It is an odd little thing in a sea of covers and I just look at it and laugh. It is absolutely awesome.

Onto the actual book. After reading the synopsis of Josie Griffin Is Not a Vampire and being lured in by the quirky cover I just had to buy the book. Josie is a character I could see myself being friends with. She was spurned by her boyfriend and reacts like many girls would love to do...bashing in his windshield with a bat, dumping her lying friends, and changing her look from cheerleader to bad ass. She is then sentenced to anger management group therapy. The kicker is that the kids in her group all believe they are supernatural creatures. Josie knows this is impossible, but she still feels something strange is going on.

I loved the attitudes/personalities of all of the characters. Readers are really able to feel as if they know the characters. I love when I'm able to read a book and enjoy the characters as people. Tarren and Johann are definitely the two who stand out the most. Tarren's spunk and attitude coupled with her word jumble are absolutely hilarious. Johann is the creepy and lovable vampire who never gives up his 80's swagger. Then there was Helios and Avis. Helios is the love interest in the book, but he is stuck up and selfish for 99% of the book. You really want to see some redemption in him, but it only "sort of" happens and the relationship just sort of splutters along. Then there is Avis. At first he has a pretty good role in the story, but as it goes on he seems to disappear and only shows up every now and then. This is a cute and short book on the surface, but for me something was a little off. In Josie Griffin is Not a Vampire readers are introduced to the supernatural world through Josie's point of view, which is that of a human. She knows absolutely nothing about this world. I am a huge fan of world building and this book just didn't do that for me. There was very little information about this world presented and the book could have used some fleshing out on this point. Several times I found myself feeling something didn't make sense because I didn't have enough background story. Secondly, there is one huge coincidence in the book that just never made sense to me. It was too odd and never really explained. ( I can't tell more without giving away who the "big bad" in the story is) I will say it has something to do with why Josie was placed in the group she was in the first place. Josie Griffin is Not a Vampire was a cute and quick read on the surface, but lacked enough information to be truly awesome. Hopefully there will be a sequel that will add more to it. I would be willing to give it a second try. This book gets a barely there 3 STAR rating.
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Sep 13, 2012 Liviania rated it 4 of 5 stars

Josie Griffin is a good kid. She's got straight As and volunteers for Habitat for Humanity. She edits the school newspaper. But she took a bat to her boyfriend's classic car when she caught him cheating on her with her best fried. Now, Josie Griffin is sentenced to anger management and community service.

But there's something strange about her anger management class. All of the kids think they are some sort of magical being. Vampires, werewolves, pixies, Greek gods . . . and there's something wei...more

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Sep 20, 2012 Carrie Ardoin rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: arc-tour, vamps, funny, other-supes

Josie Griffin has been sentenced to anger management classes after destroying her cheating boyfriend's car with a baseball bat. Once she gets there, she finds out that the other kids in the group are a bunch of wackos--claiming to be vampires, faeries, and oh yeah, Greek gods. But Josie is determined to get through the course and the laborious community service she has been assigned to.

As Josie gets to know her group mates, she realizes that as far out as it sounds, they were all telling the tru...more Josie Griffin has been sentenced to anger management classes after destroying her cheating boyfriend's car with a baseball bat. Once she gets there, she finds out that the other kids in the group are a bunch of wackos--claiming to be vampires, faeries, and oh yeah, Greek gods. But Josie is determined to get through the course and the laborious community service she has been assigned to.

As Josie gets to know her group mates, she realizes that as far out as it sounds, they were all telling the truth! Not only is she now friends with a pack of supernatural creatures, she's also trying to uncover a mystery in the shelter where she's doing her community service; girls are going missing without a trace. Can Josie and the group of paranormal misfits find out the truth?

This book pulled me in from the very beginning, but as I read on I struggled with knowing what rating I would give it. I couldn't decide if this novel was hilarious or ridiculous (and believe me, it's a fine line), so I ended up rating it right in the middle.

Josie is likable enough--she gets points just for beating up her ex's car with a bat!--but I never really connected with her. The characterization wasn't very deep in this novel, and I think that's why I didn't connect with anyone. The relationship between Josie and Helios was pretty weak. As a matter of fact, it was more interesting to watch Johann the awkward vampire fawn all over Kayla. That, at least, was funny. The group was diverse but not intriguing as a whole.

The writing was trite at times, with Tarren the dyslexic faerie botching her speech, and Josie misunderstanding things often. Though I did enjoy when Tarren mixing up her words resulted in spells which did not work they way they were intended.

I figured out the ending about halfway into the book, so when it turned out as I expected it would, that was a bit of a disappointment for me. In my opinion, this was just a very "meh" book that just left me with a few weak smiles and a lack of any other strong emotion.(less)

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Oct 01, 2012 K.C. Shaw rated it 1 of 5 stars

Shelves: fantasy, young-adult, vampires, not-owned

The book actually started off interesting, even fun. Unfortunately, after a chapter or two it nosedived. The plot is not very complicated, but it takes forever to resolve because the main character can't put the clues together. She can't, in fact, do anything at all. She's there to observe and get in trouble so her friends can rescue her.

If the book were funny, I'd forgive all that. But there isn't much humor unless you like spoonerisms and badly written slapstick. The writing is clumsy, the cha...more

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Sep 07, 2012 Heather rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: september-2012, arc-tour

Check out all my reviews at http://www.flyleafreview.com

Let's face it, many would agree that the vampire genre has been done to death (sorry, couldn't resist!) and I am sort of in agreement with them. But, if it's written well, and doesn't feature the same tired storyline but instead offers something new and inventive, then I am all about THAT kind of vampire book. The premise of Josie Griffin is Not a Vampire, a rebellious but totally human teenage girl who winds up in an anger management suppo...more Check out all my reviews at http://www.flyleafreview.com

Let's face it, many would agree that the vampire genre has been done to death (sorry, couldn't resist!) and I am sort of in agreement with them. But, if it's written well, and doesn't feature the same tired storyline but instead offers something new and inventive, then I am all about THAT kind of vampire book. The premise of Josie Griffin is Not a Vampire, a rebellious but totally human teenage girl who winds up in an anger management support group for paranormal teens ( i.e; vampires, shapeshifters, faeries, and Greek gods), really grabbed my attention. It's inventive and original and sounds awesome, right? I thought so, so I requested it with high hopes. Unfortunately, this book, which had so much potential, fell short for me.

I was looking for something that would read like the tag line above suggested:

A hilarious take on the paranormal trend--Twilight meets The Breakfast Club!

Hey, I'm not ashamed to admit that I loved the Twilight series. I credit that book for inspiring me to start reading again. And The Breakfast Club? Get out! LOVE John Hughes. LOVE. HIM. I'm pretty sure I know most of the lines in that movie and could kick any one's ass in John Hughes film trivia. And for me, any book that adds a healthy dose of humor scores major bonus points. But, other than the fact that there is a vampire in Josie Griffin, and that there is one scene of a circled up group therapy session, and there are a few witty one liners and amusing scenes written in, Josie Griffin has nothing in common with the above statement.

The beginning started strong. Teenage Josie is in court awaiting sentencing for bashing in her ex boyfriend's windshield with a baseball bat when she discovered he was screwing around with her best friend. Ordered to pay damages, court fees, and attend community service as well as an anger management group for teens, Josie knows that she has gotten off easy. She feels bad that she has upset her parents, she's worried how this will affect her chances to get into the University of Chicago where she hopes to study journalism, but she really doesn't feel too bad about what she did to her ex's car. And yeah, he does sound a like a total ass. She's not only lost her boyfriend, but her two best friends as well. As a result Josie has sort of "gone to the dark side." She's ditched her cheerleader look for a more edgy, emo appearance and started up a blog where she vents all her frustration to the world. Her only friends are a collection of angry, broken hearted online acquaintances who comment on her blog posts.

Josie attends her first group therapy session and it immediately becomes clear that this is not your average group of teenage misfits. There is something very strange about Tarren, Avis, Johann, Helios and their counselor. By the end of the session Josie is well and truly freaked out. The entire group thinks they are paranormal creatures and she promptly goes home to blog about about the bizarre encounter.

Up to this point I was really enjoying the book. I liked the character of Josie. I felt sorry for her because I've been burned by boyfriends and friends in the past (although I have never taken it to extremes like she did). Josie's a good girl, but she's hurt and she's pissed. However, as we begin to meet and learn more about the secondary characters in the book, the paranormals, my disappointment begin to grow. The characters were, for lack of a better word, cartoonish. They bordered from outright silly and farcical (Johann the vampire) to bland and blah (Helios the Greek god.) Tarren the faerie and Avis the shapeshifter were probably the most interesting of the bunch, but only because Tarren was a frightening little tyrant and Avis had dreads. In other words, I was not blown away by any of them.

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Sep 15, 2012 Jessica rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: read-in-2012

Heather Swain's latest novel, Josie Griffin Is Not a Vampire should really be called Josie Griffin Is an Angry, Angry Girl. Coming to terms with her boyfriend and best friend's betrayal (they were hooking up behind her back), the humiliation of everyone else knowing about it before her, and dealing with her anger at the situation and practically the world has been made slightly easier through Josie's favorite outlet: her blog. Sharing her stories and feelings is therapeutic and some of her reade...more Heather Swain's latest novel, Josie Griffin Is Not a Vampire should really be called Josie Griffin Is an Angry, Angry Girl. Coming to terms with her boyfriend and best friend's betrayal (they were hooking up behind her back), the humiliation of everyone else knowing about it before her, and dealing with her anger at the situation and practically the world has been made slightly easier through Josie's favorite outlet: her blog. Sharing her stories and feelings is therapeutic and some of her readers have become her circle of virtual friends.

Bashing in her ex's windshield with a bat also helped, but it landed Josie in a lot of trouble. She's been sentenced to community service at HAG, short for Helping American Girls. HAG houses runaways and helps them move forward with their life. Josie is also required to take anger management classes, which pisses her off even more because she doesn't feel like she needs them. And as she sits in on her first session, she realizes that she fits in even less than she thought she would. Everyone else in the group, including the councilor, are some type of mythical creature. Josie realizes that a story on these crack pots could be good practice for her dream career--investigative journalist--and decides to infiltrate the group and pose as one of them. But as Josie gets to know the members of her group better, her eyes are opened to how unsafe a place her town really is and begins to question what exactly makes someone a monster.

Josie is a pretty bad-ass girl even though she definitely makes some big mistakes. Josie Griffin Is Not a Vampire is a very fun read, and it's mostly because of Josie's attitude, snarky comments, and how much she cares (even though her anger won't let her admit it at first). All of the characters were very well developed and don't necessarily conform to what their mythical creature is supposed to be like. Everyone in Josie's group is pretty bad ass in their own way, and they are all funny. Heather Swain wrote everyone really well and managed to make the story funny and compelling even when parts of it are on the scarier side. (Note: That's scarier. I don't do horror, so don't expect blood and gore here.)

I highly recommend Josie Griffin Is Not a Vampire for anyone looking for a fun, light, paranormal read. (I could also see this novel becoming a great movie, btw.)(less)

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Oct 08, 2012 Anna (Gatsby's Girl) rated it 3 of 5 stars

Josie Griffin had the perfect boyfriend, great best friends and was living the teenage dream as a popular high school cheerleader. Than she found her boyfriend kissing one of her BFFs - and found out the other supposed best friend knew and didn't say anything. So you can't really blame a girl for busting out his windshield...right? Except now she's court ordered to attend anger management therapy and do community service. Not so bad, except when she lands in a group where everyone believes they'...more Josie Griffin had the perfect boyfriend, great best friends and was living the teenage dream as a popular high school cheerleader. Than she found her boyfriend kissing one of her BFFs - and found out the other supposed best friend knew and didn't say anything. So you can't really blame a girl for busting out his windshield...right? Except now she's court ordered to attend anger management therapy and do community service. Not so bad, except when she lands in a group where everyone believes they're a mythological creature. There's a vampire, a shapeshifter, a fairy, and what might be a Greek God. Then girls from the shelter that Josie is working off her community service at begin to disappear. It's up to Josie and her new friends to figure out what's going on, before it's too late for the girls that are still left. But can Josie fit in with these kids, even though she's just a human? This book started off very promising and I was laughing during the first few chapters, at Josie's fun personality and cheering for her continued strength. It didn't last. Josie stays consistently okay as a lead character, but is very shallow for the entirety of the book. She never undergoes any real character development and neither do any of the others, especially her love interest Helios. I felt like the more interesting characters in this were Tarren (the fairy) and Kayla (one of the girls from the shelter). It was very predictable, in a Saturday night B-movie kind of way. I smiled a few times, but overall I really did not connect with this one at all. The resolution to the mystery was very obvious throughout the whole book and it made me groan at the cliche of it all. A cute read, but nothing deeper below the surface.

VERDICT: 2.75/5 Stars

*I received this book as part of Around the World ARC Tours, run by the lovely Princess Bookie. No favors or money were exchanged for this review. It became available for purchase or at your local library on September 13th, 2012.*(less)

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Jan 31, 2013 Abbe Hinder rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: boring-as-hell, female-pov, i-don-t-even-know, adventure, contemporary, fantasy, speak, annoying-protagonist, what-the-hell-did-i-just-read, reviewed

This book isn't a book for me. I honestly thought I would love it, it sounds funny and like a very interesting, lighthearted read. Instead I got a disorganized book that is full of dumb and boring things. In the beginning, everything was going great, it was interesting and even a little funny. That quickly changed once I reached chapter four or five. The characters are all stiff and seem like complete jokes. Nothing interesting happens in this book that really caught my attention. It really anno...more

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Feb 02, 2013 Allie rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: humor, paranormal, young-adult

I cannot for the life of me remember why this book was on my TBR list. I think I may have entered a giveaway waaaaaaay back when to win an ARC and then I just sort of left it there. Anyways, flash forward six months and I see this sitting at the Cupertino Public Library (aka the best library ever, but more on that later). So I see this book. I grab it in my frenzied collection, check out, and bring it home. It was on the top of the pile so I read it first. Lil' guy literally took me 90 minutes t...more

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Oct 09, 2012 Catalla.18 added it

Josie was a good kid. Habitat for Hummanity. On the Cheerleading Squad. So what led her to anger management with Vampires, Faeries, and Shape Shifters? In this book Josie became more loyal, and really started to undersand what she wanted to do with her life. So cheerleading wasn't her thing anymore. Anyway's now she can focus on journalism which is another thing she got better at during the book. Snooping is how she found out about everything anyway...

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Mar 20, 2013 Britney rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: okay

Truthfully, I read this book because I had nothing else to read and needed something to pass time. It was a good book, I guess. I wish there had been more romance, but otherwise it was okay.

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Jan 27, 2013 Samantha rated it 5 of 5 stars

Loved it, cute, fun, peppy book. Great cast of characters, this book read like a short story. I enjoyed the ease of it.

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Oct 14, 2012 Traci rated it 5 of 5 stars

Laughed out loud!!!!!!!!

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Dec 20, 2012 Melissa Wehunt rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: ya-fantasy, ya-paranormal, ya-realstic-problems, ya-supernatural, ya-urban-fantasy, ya-vampires

I really enjoyed the first 2 chapters. I had total hope for the book, but it just didn't do it for me as I kept reading... So, maybe for teens and preteens this would be a fun urban fiction lite...but not for me and probably not for most adults...

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Jun 17, 2013 Mehsi rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: sparkles-are-so-last-season, away-laughing-on-a-fast-camel, warning-english-books

This book was hilarious!! I loved the story, though I wished our main lead would have confessed sooner to the I am not a monster part. :)

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Jun 13, 2013 Oda Lyngstad oltedal marked it as to-read

Jun 10, 2013 Sarah marked it as to-read

Shelves: wishlist

May 30, 2013 Sarah rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: teen-fiction

May 10, 2013 Alicia Medina rated it 5 of 5 stars

May 09, 2013 Robin Graves marked it as wish-list

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Shelves: covers

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Mar 08, 2013 Mary Beth rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: young-adult

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Shelves: ya, paranormal

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About Heather Swain

Heather Swain lives in a crooked house in Brooklyn, New York with her husband, two children, and a barkless dog. She is the author of novels for adults and young adults, craft books, and numerous short stories, personal essays, and non-fiction articles.

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