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It Will Never Happen to Me!
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It Will Never Happen to Me!

4.22 of 5 stars 4.22  ·  rating details  ·  622 ratings  ·  21 reviews
This "little green book," as it has come to be known to hundreds of thousands of C.O.A.'s and A.C.O.A.'s, is meant to help the reader understand the roles children in alcoholic families adopt, the problems they face in adulthood as a result, and what they can do to break the pattern of destruction.
Paperback, 224 pages
Published September 12th 1987 by Ballantine Books (first published April 1st 1982)
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Substance Abuse & Addiction
445th out of 465 books — 1,070 voters
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Healing; Recovery
8th out of 15 books — 3 voters


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Community Reviews

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Elizabeth
Dr. Black's analysis of ACOA's is pretty dead on. Coming from a home with an alcoholic parent I found myself relating a lot to what she says in her book. While I do think a lot of it is very - how do you say? - surface stuff, I understand the need for it considering it's meant to be sold to a wide amount of people. Dr. Black also offers a lot of names and suggestions for ways to help kids currently growing up in addictive households, but not nearly as many suggestions for Adult Children.

If you...more
James
This book established Claudia Black as one of the leading figures in the self-help/spiritual recovery movement for adult children of alcoholics. The title refers to the grim vow that so many made as children, watching their alcoholic/otherwise addicted parents' behaviors and consequences; unfortunately, as Black points out, once those children become adults, it's all too likely that they will indeed repeat those patterns unless they take vigorous and focused action to change them and break the c...more
Rachel Smith
I was really unsure about reading this book because I didn't think I fit the mold. I didn't think that I suffered from the effects of being the adult child of an alcoholic because I didn't know my parents had addictions until I was an adult. I was so incredibly wrong. This book helped so many things I have felt and experienced as a child and as an adult make sense. I am so thankful I found this book and highly recommend it for ACOA's and children of other dysfunctional families.
Brandy
Another great book about growing up in an alcoholic/dysfunctional home. Explains the roles children tend to take on in an alcoholic home and how these roles, critical for survival during childhood, don't carry over well into adult life. Extremely helpful book, provided a ton of insight.
Anneg
Oct 24, 2011 Anneg rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommended to Anneg by: therapist
It was a revelation that kept me alive. It explained and gave answers to all my questions mostly:Why?
Still at 56 I feel the pain but now I know why and it keeps me going.
I have given so many of this wonderful book to other bruised children.
It is time to live and stop surviving.
Lauren
To be fair, I haven't finished this book yet (about three quarters of the way through) but I feel like I must be crazy after reading so many glowing reviews! First of all, the book is so riddled with typos and grammatical errors (can someone please explain to this woman how a comma works) that I find it hard to concentrate on the message. It's poorly written and clearly was not edited.

Secondly, it's full of idealistic garbage. The idea that children - who are currently living in a home where one...more
Bonnie Randall
As an addictions counselor, I provide service to a disproportionate number of clients who are Adult Children of Alcoholics / Addicts; wounded men and women who are shell-shocked by their broken childhoods.

Dr. Black’s collection of powerful vignettes, woven between both therapeutic analysis and strategies, provides me options in the counseling room. For my highest functioning clients, this book can be a resource they can read on their own and apply to themselves. For my others who are more fragi...more
Aurelien
This 'little green book' will be invaluable to any ACoA. The thing is, Claudia Black doesn't only focus on alcoholic parents and their impact on their children but, looks at the family as a whole (e.g. how even a non-alcoholic parent's behaviour, in such a context, can be as damaging to a child) and, beyond, how such families also interact with the 'outside world'. Talking thus about co-alcoholism (a key concept) her view allows for a deeper understanding of how dysfunctional families affected b...more
Sara
This book is about adult children of alcoholics. It talks about common characteristics of adult children. It is very interesting and useful to gain awareness to see how your life has been shaped by being a child of an alcoholic or another addicted person. Awareness and coming out of denial is one of the first steps of recovery, so it was very good. Easy to understand.
Dalyn
Changed my life...was the beginning of ten years of self awareness and change. Thank you Claudia Black for putting into words what I could not.
Cynthia Harrison
I am 57 years old and before reading this book I did not know why that the moment I lost 20 lbs. I began to gain it back at the rate of 3-5 lbs. a week.

A friend recommended this author to me after we talked about addiction issues in our pasts. I could not believe she had ever been 100 lbs overweight! I've known her several years and she's always been slim and trim. Claudia Black writes that 60% of Americans have some trouble with addictions. And one addiction can lead to another. I know this is...more
Jean Marie Angelo
It all seems obvious now, but 30 years ago Black was the first to put together the relationship between growing up in an alcoholic home and becoming an alcoholic, loving an alcoholic, feeling worthlesss, and feeling anxious and depressed. One of those books that changed my life. I know I write that a lot in these reviews, but in this case I really, really mean it.
Margot Note
"Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." Yes, but addictive families are all similar and abide by the same rules: don't talk, don't trust, don't feel. It is possible, however, to grow up in an alcoholic, dysfunctional household and be an emotionally healthy adult.
Ludditic
This topic touches a majority of the people that i know well. It has some very interesting observations about ACOA's
Adrienne
I learned that I was not alone. I learned that there was a long road ahead of me. I learned that there is hope.
Jessica
I finally finished this book.....great read on the family dynamics of an alcoholic...excellant resource!!
Lynn mier
its interesting....its my textbook for class but there really is some good information in here.
Darleen
Gave me a clear understanding of myself, in view of my childhood.
Joe
Outlines the roles in the dysfuntional alcohollic family.
Arlene
It's been a whiloe, probably could use a re-read.
Rose
Mar 19, 2009 Rose added it
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