A Complicated Kindness
by Miriam Toewspublished
August 17th 2005
by Counterpoint Press
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binding
Paperback, 253 pages
literary awards
2004 Governor General's Award, 2004 Giller Prize Nominee
isbn
1582433224
(isbn13: 9781582433226)
description
In this stunning coming-of-age novel, award-winner Miriam Toews balances grief and hope in the voice of a witty, beleaguered teenager whose family is ...more
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bookshelves:
fiction
Read in November, 2004
“A Complicated Kindness” is an amazing tightrope-walk of a novel. It is a story where the roots of tragedy are deep, coming from a past before any of the characters presented within were even born. And yet, the characters, especially Nomi, our protagonist, are thrillingly present, cracklingly alive in the here and now.
There is damage, but there are also beautiful glimmers of hope shining through. There are dreams, and the knowledge that their dreams may remain only that--visions out o...more
There is damage, but there are also beautiful glimmers of hope shining through. There are dreams, and the knowledge that their dreams may remain only that--visions out o...more
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bookshelves:
canadian,
women-writers
recommends it for: rebel mennonites
Read in July, 2008
recommended to Lesliemae by:
its content recommended itself to merecommends it for: rebel mennonites
I found the humour and lambasting of a closed religious community very entertaining (in a sad way), but I was really hoping to hear about what it was like for her when she left the community.
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I didn't want to leave the bookstore (BMV on Bloor Street) because it was a cool reprieve from the 30+ heat and they were playing Van Morrison. There is something about Van Morrison that makes me feel as comfortable as sitting on a porch in the endless summer twilight with nothing by a lig...more
Inscription:
I didn't want to leave the bookstore (BMV on Bloor Street) because it was a cool reprieve from the 30+ heat and they were playing Van Morrison. There is something about Van Morrison that makes me feel as comfortable as sitting on a porch in the endless summer twilight with nothing by a lig...more
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Read in August, 2006
recommends it for:
Troubled teenage Mennonites
This book seemed right up my alley, but after awhile I got tired of it. And I have to question why--I mean, the reason it was recommended it to me was that it is from a 16-year-old girl’s perspective in a Mennonite community and is dealing with how this has affected her family (her mother and sister left her and her father). But even though things happen, I’m not all that interested in them most of the time and the flashing back and forth kind of annoys me as do little phrases like “I hear...more
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I've read many reviews of this book. Some rave. Others pan. I gather that in Canada this book got some press -- It won the Governor General's Award and was nominated for the Giller Prize. There was hype. No doubt about it.
The tricky thing about hype is, it inflates the expectations of readers. Takes what may be good and creates desires for greatness. Not only that it sometimes draws in readers for whom the book was never intended.
Luckily, I was exactly the person for whom Toews was writing. ...more
The tricky thing about hype is, it inflates the expectations of readers. Takes what may be good and creates desires for greatness. Not only that it sometimes draws in readers for whom the book was never intended.
Luckily, I was exactly the person for whom Toews was writing. ...more
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affecting-fiction
Read in July, 2007
Author details: I just read an interview with her and I think I understand so much more why I like her. She grew up Mennonite in a small town (like the narrator of her book) and then she moved to Montreal. The interviewer asked her about her transition and Miriam responded, "It was exciting and it was stimulating. I loved the cosmopolitan culture and its physical beauty, but at the same time I was stuck in between worlds and wondering where I was going to best fit in. I felt like an outside...more
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2007,
favorites
Has a copy to sell/swap
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Read in January, 2007
recommends it for:
fans of lorrie moore, and everyone else
It's hardest to write reviews about books you love so much, isn't it?
The writing is so sharp and beautiful and sparkling, the humor so *amazing*.. I'm just going to melt into a puddle talking about it.
It's told from the perspective of a 16-year-old girl named Nomi~ she lives in an odd, strict Mennonite town in Canada with her father. Her mother and older sister fled from the family, the town, the fundamentalist faith, each on their own path to who knows where, and Nomi is left with many...more
The writing is so sharp and beautiful and sparkling, the humor so *amazing*.. I'm just going to melt into a puddle talking about it.
It's told from the perspective of a 16-year-old girl named Nomi~ she lives in an odd, strict Mennonite town in Canada with her father. Her mother and older sister fled from the family, the town, the fundamentalist faith, each on their own path to who knows where, and Nomi is left with many...more
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Read in May, 2007
This book broke my heart. I loved the main character and her narrative voice. It's about Nomi Nickel, a rebellious teenager growing up in a Mennonite town in Manitoba. It reminded me a lot of The Catcher in the Rye, since Nomi is frustrated with her life and her environment and tries to deal with it by acting out. Like Holden Caulfield, she's smart, funny, and very sarcastic, and is much saner than everyone around her, even though they all think she's crazy. The narrative is often la...more
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Read in October, 2008
recommends it for:
Nobody
My biggest pet peeve is when authors use "creative" or lack of proper punction. This would have been a better book and more easily read if the author used quotes in conversation. I failed to look INSIDE the book, but the story sounded good from the back cover.
Cormac McCarty although highly regarded as a great author does the same thing. As with LOL James Frey ** But I gotta give some street cred to anyone who could pull the wool over Oprah's eyes, since she is the book expert....more
Cormac McCarty although highly regarded as a great author does the same thing. As with LOL James Frey ** But I gotta give some street cred to anyone who could pull the wool over Oprah's eyes, since she is the book expert....more
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Read in September, 2008
This book was pretty interesting--from the perspective of a teenage girl who seems pretty troubled (and she has a few good reasons)--or as one character says in the book, it's not the highlight of her life, or some such thing. It reminded me a little bit of The Heart is a Lonely Hunter in tone & with another teenage protagonist. This would be an interesting book for a book club, because the things that happen really are a complicated kindness. I wanted a little more resolution though and ...more
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Read in August, 2008
This book drove me nuts! The concept was very interesting and I liked the story, but the way it was written was not for me. It was written as a narrative from a young Mennonite girl. It felt like Nomi, the young narrator, was just thinking as she wrote. She would start one memory, then realize she was daydreaming and jump to reality, and I kept being like "Wait! What happened in that memory!" It was also uncomfortable in spots where she would write I . . . uh . . . oh . . . noth...more
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Read in August, 2007
"I really enjoyed the narration in the first section, where the protagonista, an emotionally complicated Mennonite teenager, is describing her life and the life of her family in scraps and pieces and found objects. I loved how the story coalesced out of those fragments. I did not so much enjoy the actual climax of the book, because my tolerance for books where teenagers go off the deep end, as expressed by funny haircuts and/or glue sniffing and/or lying on the ground feeling bad about life...more
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bookshelves:
pending-book
Has a copy to sell/swap
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Read in January, 2008
recommends it for:
anyone who love surprises
I have it on my bookshelf for almost a year. I plan to read it soon. At first, it was the cover that moved me. Different than the book's jacket showed in the icon image, mine is more classic and artistic. It shows an old photograph of girls running, covering their heads from rain. I hope that the inside of the package has the same quality as shown on the jacket. Since one should really pay attention to the old saying of "Don't judge the book by its cover!" Hahaha...Allow me to decide o...more
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2007-read
Read in December, 2007
I absolutely loved this book, though it was not at all what I expected. I'd thought that the book would have more focus on the Mennonite church and its practices, but instead the book was one of the more wonderful character-driven novels I've read. The book fell apart in the final chapter, but I'm willing to forgive the author not knowing how to end because the rest fo the book was such a delight to read. The book captures the experience of faith followed by questioning in a way that was star...more
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Has a copy to sell/swap
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Read in December, 2007
This book struck a real cord for me because my mother left when I was 4 years old. I also believe a big reason she left was because of my father's religious fanaticism. WARNING SPOILER -- So, while I feel the writer did an excellent job of showing how the mother's abandonment affected this child's life, I cannot reconcile myself to what her father did. Maybe that's how we're supposed to feel, but I definitely got the idea that the author thought her father paid her a "complicated kindnes...more
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I admit that I read this because John K. Samson of the Weakerthans championed it in Canada Reads. Toews has written some really interesting nonfiction (one of her pieces, a series of letters to the absentee father of her child, was played on This American Life), and this coming-of-age story set in a small Mennonite village in Manitoba is pretty and sad -- and a little too angst-y. Still, it seems to do a good job evoking both the despair of feeling trapped in a small town and the exhilaration of...more
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Read in April, 2008
recommends it for:
precocious teenage narrators, God
I don't know, is this a three? It was a fun read. I loved the narrator and I wish she could have come over to hang out. But, there was a little too much drama in the plot. I mean, you already have a Mennonite girl whose mother and sister have left the community (shunning! there are days when I want to shun people) and who is having a spiritual/drug-induced personal crisis. How much more drama do you need? Affairs, best friends dying, sad old people, etc--no. You do not need these things. I'm gla...more
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7 comments
bookshelves:
2008
Read in February, 2008
All the reviews I read about this book said it was revolutionary and yet somehow derivative of classic American Lit. While I don't debate this (fundamentally because I am clearly so poorly informed on classic American literature that I haven't read aforementioned text that ACK is derived from) I have trouble believing that this narrative could be anything but itself.
It's the essence of Manitobiana (ha!) and Steinbachism. Yes, few will get that.
I was born in Nomi's town in the ...more
It's the essence of Manitobiana (ha!) and Steinbachism. Yes, few will get that.
I was born in Nomi's town in the ...more
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recommends it for:
rod
A very interesting book for those of us who work with people. This rather sad tale relates the story of a girl growing up in a Mennonite town in Manitoba. Sadly, no one makes much effort to know her or understand her. She makes an effort to understand and survive in the world other adults have screwed up for her.. but these coping behaviours are misunderstood by others.
A reminder to listen to others esp the marginalized and realize we all have stories to tell and we all try to act in a...more
A reminder to listen to others esp the marginalized and realize we all have stories to tell and we all try to act in a...more
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bookshelves:
more-lit-less-chick
Read in November, 2007
SLOW..but a friend promised once you get into it it's better. So far, not so much! LOL She's so sarcastic and negative about menonite life, yet she stays and participates?!?! I think the only reason she doesn't run off like her mom and sister is that deep down she needs the security and sense of community the place offers. After the mom and sister leave, she needs that more than ever, even if it's coming from a place she doesn't much like.
Jenny - I'm still hanging in there but I've wandered ...more
Jenny - I'm still hanging in there but I've wandered ...more
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Read in December, 2007
recommended to Elisa by:
Carrie Rollwagon
This book was wonderful. It is about a girl who is growing up as a Canadian Mennonite. However, it turns out that Canadian Mennonites are a lot like Southern Baptists! It is a 'coming of age story' that deals with church, family, traditions, drugs, kissing...you get the idea. Nomi Nickel is one of my favorite characters that I have met recently. I read this book after a tragic event happened in my life and it was a good distraction, but not in a 'I will read anything to take my mind off my ...more
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