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Santa Claus and the El...
 
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Jordan Krall
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Santa Claus and the Elves of Fuck

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4.17 of 5 stars 4.17  ·  rating details  ·  24 ratings  ·  6 reviews
The kinkiest Christmas story ever!

After Santa is unfaithful one too many times, Mrs. Claus hires the lethal Elves of Fuck to "take care" of him. But when Santa is abducted by a mysterious peppermint dominatrix, everything explodes into an orgy of bondage, torture, sex, and sugarplum gore.

This is a violent and sexy Christmas story for adults only.

Kindle Edition
Published (first published November 22nd 2011)
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Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 38)
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Donald Armfield
Santa thinks with his second brain, just as much as the next guy. But this year in between delivering toys and catching a quickie with some random chick. Santa might just meet the naughty list with a huge dominatrix spanking.

The smell of peppermint has kidnapped Santa. Mrs. Clause is thinking he is being the cheating spouse he is, (like always.) He is locked away in a bitch-box being tortured with peppermint smelling bodily fluids and the smell of feet. The elves of fuck have been sent to kill h
...more
Tony Bertauski
I've never dropped acid. But if I did, I think I would enjoy this book.

I ran into it on Amazon by accident and with a title like the above, it was hard not to look inside. The first couple of chapters are irreverent to the nth degree. While I'm not opposed to erotica, it's not something I reach for. This was not that. It was something far stranger and twisted.

What started out as something out of a Bad Santa script (funny and cringe-worthy) the later chapters devolved into something far less inte
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Dana King
Silly fun from the usually serious mind of Krall.
Paige Ellen Stone
Just read it. Only a mind as ingeniously demented as Mr. Krall's could come up with this. It's a fast read... well, if you exclude the amount of time you will spend laughing your ass off... The strange thing is, I'm willing to bet he was stone cold sober when he wrote it. Demented, bizarre, bad taste, it's all here for the ass king (sic)... If you don't have a truly free and loose sense of humor, don't bother - you won't get it. Otherwise, read and howl...
Sam McCanna
I just read this on Christmas day and had a lot of fun with it.
It is very short, and doesn't have quite the polish of Krall's longer works, so I've docked it a star, however the naughty story within is a riot, and pulls you through it, just waiting to find out what's going to happen in the end.
Highly recommended next time you are in the mood for a little Christmas cheer!
Velia
wow...Mrs Claus is a woman not to be messed with.

I still don't know what the history of Tusk city is and I still want to know.
Jeremy Maddux
Jeremy Maddux marked it as to-read
Apr 07, 2015
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Jordan
Aug 05, 2012 Jordan rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  (Review from the author)
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