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Does Anybody Else Look Like Me?: A Parent's Guide To Raising Multiracial Children
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Does Anybody Else Look Like Me?: A Parent's Guide To Raising Multiracial Children

3.76  ·  Rating Details  ·  120 Ratings  ·  24 Reviews
"Am I black or white or am I American?" "Why don't my eyes look like yours?" "Why do people always call attention to my 'different' hair?" Helping a child understand his mixed racial background can be daunting, especially when, whether out of honest appreciation or mean-spiritedness, peers and strangers alike perceive his features to be "other."Drawing on psychological res ...more
Hardcover, 240 pages
Published June 18th 2003 by Da Capo Press (first published January 1st 2003)
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Nov 04, 2010 Jessica rated it liked it
I learned a lot from this book, but as a prospective adoptive parent, I did skip over large sections that seemed to pertain only to families created through parents having multiracial children by birth. For that group, I'm sure it is an even better resource. Much of the book does transfer over to multiracial adoptive families though.

Early in the book the author goes through multiple age ranges and how children of those particular ages understand and conceptualize race. This will be helpful as o
Oct 11, 2011 Lynn rated it did not like it
I had high hopes for this book, but the suggestions are really obvious and can be summarized as "communicate with your kids." This book also seems very focused on issues that parents face in very homogenous areas. I live in a fairly diverse city, but imagine we will still face issues and was hoping this book would help us prepare for some of them. The topic is a good one, but the content seriously misses the mark.
Camelia Rose
May 14, 2016 Camelia Rose rated it liked it
Shelves: race-study, parenting
This book is mostly a collection of interviews of people from multi-racial background,
their experiences in dealing with racism and identity issues. It is roughly organised by age. The book also includes some analysis of American society. I am a little disappointed because I was looking for a practical parental guidebook in the fashion of How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk. Having said that, I still find it an informative book. Here is what I've learned:

1. Parents the
Feb 22, 2008 Abigail rated it really liked it
This book is written by a white woman who's married to a Japanese-American man and has two biracial children. She uses some of her own experience raising her children, as well lots of stories and ideas from other parents and children, to talk about what parents can do to raise their multicultural or transracially adopted children to become confident and competent adults. It's a very thoughtfully written book, as well as well-researched, as shown through the personal testimonies that appear all t ...more
Apr 19, 2009 Rick rated it really liked it
Shelves: self-improvement
This book was incredibly revealing about the possible future of a multiracial child that we might adopt might have -- the cruel questions in the supermarket as toddlers, the cruel racism of the teenage years, the unforgiving questions of the 5-8 years from peers and teachers. We will be prepared and train ourselves for creating a strong sense of multiracial identity with our child -- like chocolate ice cream and vanilla -- mixed together, but sooooo much more complicated.
Raising multiracial kids to be color-blind will not work says the author. She discusses ways to raise a multiracial child to have positive self-esteem, be appreciative of all their cultures, develop a comfortable self-identity, and be able to deal with people who are ignorant of multiracial issues. The key to successfully raising multiracial kids in a world of social race constructs is developing an ongoing, open dialog about race and culture. The author looks at three key developmental stages: ...more
Jul 09, 2009 Crystal rated it really liked it
I would recommend this book. As the parent of multiracial children, I saw a lot of my familiy's experiences in it.
Bob Bellamy
Mar 03, 2014 Bob Bellamy rated it it was ok
Poorly edited to the point of distraction. She gives too many qualifiers on people she introduced and utilized throughout the book. I guess the author thinks you can't remember a few names. Sometimes this is helpful if they have not been mentioned for a while but seriously, she gives the same information about an author two pages later. It is too much.

The information seems fine but as I read elsewhere, this is a Caucasian mother writing about raising her multiethnic children. Also, it is somewha
Feb 02, 2009 Stephanie rated it really liked it
Shelves: adoption
book jacket description -

"The author, a freelance writer, is from a western European background, while her husband is Japanese American. Although Nakazawa initially hoped to raise her son and daughter to be "color blind," they couldn't ignore the many comments made by both adults and children concerning Christian and Claire's appearance. When Christian was a toddler he was asked if he spoke Chinese, and the author was assured that little Claire didn't "even look Asian." Nakazawa decided to deve
Aug 05, 2010 Cathleen rated it liked it
A decent book for parents that have experienced growing up in the majority who have a child that may be in the minority. It does touch on struggles that may be specific to multiracial children, but much of the discussion could apply to any minority child. Growing up in Asian in a nearly all white community, I could relate a lot to the anecdotes provided by interviewees. There are some good suggestions on how to deal with inevitable questions from kids and their peers, how to teach your child to ...more
Jan 04, 2009 ABC rated it really liked it
Shelves: teens-and-adults
This book is geared to parents of kids who are multi-racial or parents of kids who are transracially adopted, but it is good reading for anyone who is interested in race issues.

My only complaint was that the author stresses the importance of family and telling your child "family is forever", but doesn't give advice if one doesn't have a good family setting for the child, which I think is important in this age when divorce is common.
May 01, 2009 Jenny rated it really liked it
Shelves: adoption
In a world where the once-rigid lines of race are becoming (thankfully) more blurred, Donna does a great job addressing this question. What is it about human nature that desires to fit other in "nice, neat compartments" so we can feel secure about ourselves? This is a book for anyone who does not fit into a nice, neat compartment...and also for anyone who desires to know a multiracial's experience.
Apr 11, 2015 Tonya rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I gave up on finishing this book. I got about 1/3 of the way through and realized that it is much more of a resource for biracial/whatever type of mixed race parents and kids than my situation, which IS transracial adoption but neither of my kids are biracial. it has a lot of good insight and I'd recommend it to any who feel they'd benefit from reading it.
Finished the first chapter and am getting a lot out of it. Nicely integrates anecdotes from Nakazawa's interviewees and psychology/ child development research. Makes a good case for why love isn't all you need when raising a multiracial child... No discussion of implicit race bias yet.
Jul 14, 2012 Jessica rated it liked it
This is a good book if you are raising a multiracial child. It gives you some things to think about before the awkward situations come. My daughter is only 8 months old, but we've already gotten the questions of "Oh, is she adopted?". "No, she's my daughter. Stop being nosy!".
Nov 12, 2008 Pghgranola rated it really liked it
written by a parent raising Hapa children, so she can honestly appreciate the complexity of such a situation.

one of the few books, that i have found, that approaches the subject in terms of preschoolers. most other books tackle the issue with grade-school ages & up.

K Anderson
Dec 26, 2011 K Anderson rated it liked it
This book was interesting to read from a teachers perspective. Interesting book, but this is definitely written as white parents guide to raising multiracial kids. I read it for a book club and multiracial parents in the group had the same feeling.
Jan 14, 2012 Christy rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2012-challenge
I found this book to be useful for me from a professional perspective and a parental perspective. Lots of anecdotal information and useful suggestions for parents to promote positive racial/ethnic socialization in their children.
Apr 03, 2009 Vive-un-Livre rated it really liked it
Sent to us by our agency while we waited to go get our daughter. Gave some good insight - and zingers - to use on friendly and not so friendly stranger observations of our family.
Oct 13, 2012 Christine rated it it was amazing
I registered a book at!
Mar 22, 2008 Heidi rated it really liked it
Practical advice for parents, not just another scholarly look at race and identity. Had to have it for my personal collection.
Jen Chau
Apr 21, 2007 Jen Chau rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: mixedrace
some good points...but overall, horrible advice for parents of mixed kids. DO NOT use as a resource!
Jan 26, 2011 Valerie rated it it was amazing
every parent should read this--whether the parent of bi-racial kids or not! : -)
Celeste Ng
research, but not surprisingly, also relevant to my life.
Tracy marked it as to-read
May 13, 2016
Yuki rated it liked it
May 01, 2016
Elissa marked it as to-read
Apr 10, 2016
Breonna Roberts
Breonna Roberts rated it it was amazing
Mar 31, 2016
Kristine Hansen
Kristine Hansen marked it as to-read
Mar 18, 2016
Lisa marked it as to-read
Mar 10, 2016
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Donna Jackson Nakazawa’s writing career began when she was twelve years old. Her father, a journalist, had passed away unexpectedly, his death a mystery she couldn’t seem to solve, and she found herself recording in a forgotten journal everything she was feeling, everything the people around her were feeling, who said and did what, what it all might mean. Writing helped her to make sense of a worl ...more
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