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Never Say I Can't ... after stroke
"Never Say I Can't" has been awarded The IndiePENdents Seal for quality.
“Never say I Can’t” is the gripping, humorous, and occasionally devastating first person account of a serving policeman, who at 30 years of age, suffered a major stroke. This is his battle against the odds to survive, to recover and to succeed.
***
I don't know what the ambulance man did with my bucket. Where did the medical staff put their faces? Mine was in the bucket.
It made sense to me.
The doctors called it CVA. A few called it a stroke.
I laughed. I thought it was a joke!
Additional material - Poems: Hand Writing, The Game, and Just a Joke.
“Never say I Can’t” is the gripping, humorous, and occasionally devastating first person account of a serving policeman, who at 30 years of age, suffered a major stroke. This is his battle against the odds to survive, to recover and to succeed.
***
I don't know what the ambulance man did with my bucket. Where did the medical staff put their faces? Mine was in the bucket.
It made sense to me.
The doctors called it CVA. A few called it a stroke.
I laughed. I thought it was a joke!
Additional material - Poems: Hand Writing, The Game, and Just a Joke.
239 pages, Kindle Edition
First published December 3, 2011
1 person is currently reading
10 people want to read
About the author
Philip Catshill
10 books185 followersPhilip Catshill is a former British police officer and lives in England. He has had several unique life experiences, near death encounters, physical disabilities and emotional incidents that have combined to provide a firm foundation for his excellent stories.
At the age of 30, an accidental blow to his head followed by a few drinks at a party brought on a massive stroke. To return to work as an operational police officer proved to be a sometimes amusing, sometimes daunting struggle that took 18 months.
With great pride in this achievement, he survived another 11 years as a uniformed police sergeant. During this time, he stretched his mind to the limit by studying for a degree.
Nine years after that first stroke, a younger man took interest in his family, his home but mostly, his wife. Within weeks, his 19 year marriage was at an end, his mind and life collapsed. His inability to cope with the changes left him homeless and estranged from all that he had loved and the daughters he cherished for 18 and 15 years respectively. Despite having no faith, he was encouraged to pray. Amazingly, he discovered that prayer works! Throughout the loneliness and despair of being homeless, prayer sustained him and brought him to a new life, new love, but most of all, a loving and welcoming family that was happy to love him as their own.
It was meant to be a happy ever after ending to the tragedies, but just four weeks after his last exam to give him his degree, and 16 days after his second marriage, a road accident caused a second major stroke, bringing his working life to an abrupt end.
Undaunted and determined to defy the paralysis, he took up music and art, achieving piano grade 3 and paintings that are quite simply breath-taking. (http://www.philipcatshill.com)
As he approached his 60th birthday, Philip, who is still severely disabled, decided to write about that stroke from 30 years before. From that experience, the fictional character of Mike Newman emerged. In writing his books, Philip hopes to encourage others to put their story into words.
To demonstrate his abilities and not dwell on his disabilities, he has chosen to take complete responsibility for his books from the first click of the computer keyboard to the final publication of the novel, short story or poem. By taking online courses to improve his language, punctuation and grammar, and learning skills in different aspects of writing, story-telling and editing, Philip is determined to show that even with severe brain damage, he has the ability to write, edit, and publish first class novels, short stories and poetry without involving anyone else in the process.
This doesn’t mean his stories are in anyway inferior. In fact, Philip’s creative writing, believable characters and convincing narrative has been acclaimed in countless reviews. One of his novels reached the final rounds of two international awards, and Awesome Indies approved his novel, Penny for Them for quality. His stroke memoir, “Never say I can’t” received the IndiePENdents Seal for outstanding quality.
Whenever time permits, Philip continues to offer support, help, advice and guidance to fellow writers wherever it is needed.
Philip is the type of guy who will never say I can’t.
At the age of 30, an accidental blow to his head followed by a few drinks at a party brought on a massive stroke. To return to work as an operational police officer proved to be a sometimes amusing, sometimes daunting struggle that took 18 months.
With great pride in this achievement, he survived another 11 years as a uniformed police sergeant. During this time, he stretched his mind to the limit by studying for a degree.
Nine years after that first stroke, a younger man took interest in his family, his home but mostly, his wife. Within weeks, his 19 year marriage was at an end, his mind and life collapsed. His inability to cope with the changes left him homeless and estranged from all that he had loved and the daughters he cherished for 18 and 15 years respectively. Despite having no faith, he was encouraged to pray. Amazingly, he discovered that prayer works! Throughout the loneliness and despair of being homeless, prayer sustained him and brought him to a new life, new love, but most of all, a loving and welcoming family that was happy to love him as their own.
It was meant to be a happy ever after ending to the tragedies, but just four weeks after his last exam to give him his degree, and 16 days after his second marriage, a road accident caused a second major stroke, bringing his working life to an abrupt end.
Undaunted and determined to defy the paralysis, he took up music and art, achieving piano grade 3 and paintings that are quite simply breath-taking. (http://www.philipcatshill.com)
As he approached his 60th birthday, Philip, who is still severely disabled, decided to write about that stroke from 30 years before. From that experience, the fictional character of Mike Newman emerged. In writing his books, Philip hopes to encourage others to put their story into words.
To demonstrate his abilities and not dwell on his disabilities, he has chosen to take complete responsibility for his books from the first click of the computer keyboard to the final publication of the novel, short story or poem. By taking online courses to improve his language, punctuation and grammar, and learning skills in different aspects of writing, story-telling and editing, Philip is determined to show that even with severe brain damage, he has the ability to write, edit, and publish first class novels, short stories and poetry without involving anyone else in the process.
This doesn’t mean his stories are in anyway inferior. In fact, Philip’s creative writing, believable characters and convincing narrative has been acclaimed in countless reviews. One of his novels reached the final rounds of two international awards, and Awesome Indies approved his novel, Penny for Them for quality. His stroke memoir, “Never say I can’t” received the IndiePENdents Seal for outstanding quality.
Whenever time permits, Philip continues to offer support, help, advice and guidance to fellow writers wherever it is needed.
Philip is the type of guy who will never say I can’t.
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
February 9, 2019
This is a wonderful true to life book, written by the sufferer of a major cerebrovascular accident experienced at the very young age of thirty. Having just received his sergeant’s strips as a British Policeman, Catshill is cut down to a physical half, with a severely damaged long and short-term memory and at first a total lack of coherent speech. He had to learn how to regain control of his motor functions, especially those on the entire right side of his body, and his mind. The man even had to ‘retrain’ his injured brain to see through what had become a suddenly ‘disconnected’ right eye. His courage, honesty, and determination shine through in proverbial buckets.
Catshill has survived not only this story’s devastating stroke, but two more less severe episodes since. That is that they were considerably less severe than the first, but by no means inconsequential. In his rebuilt life he has become a first class autobiographer and in another genre fiction writer. This is the sort of story that should fortify the determination of any one of us having fallen into some form of severe health crisis. Except sadly, our own minds are likely to be so shattered or simply pre-occupied that we will fail to benefit from any memories from this amazing story about the will to recover.
This is an immensely humorous book, though of course often of a very black nature, but one that raises genuine belly laughs at that, and so it should for live is unbearable if we try to treat every unfortunate situation with only the gravity it naturally generates. It goes without saying that it also inevitably moistens one’s eyes. I felt at liberty to laugh at Catshill’s struggles, laughing with him, but taking the seriousness, the mental depression, the physical distress on-board.
In many ways this will always be a unique book, as it is rare for anyone to recover from such major trauma, and to also have the intellectual ability to subsequently write so well about the event. When the trauma is of the nature of a stroke, a literal cerebral infarction, then this book must be seen as all the more remarkable. This isn’t a some imagined third person narrative or ghost-written augmentation of the victim’s capacity, this is true, direct, gritty autobiography.
Some living individuals don’t come out of this narrative at all well, as brutal honesty extends beyond the author himself. I trust that their identities are well hidden. Arguably, biography can only be real when the wide field is truly accurate. There is no implied criticism on my part, only reason that would always prevent me getting to close to publicly disclosed personal truth. Memoir is an often-painful genre. As we read in this story, we notice how a simple sentence, spoken or written, can be totally devastating or by tone or tiny change be the greatest of empowering gifts. Recovery is always easier with the kindness of others and can hang in the balance either way on very few targeted words. The words in this book are chosen and ordered to strong affect.
Catshill has survived not only this story’s devastating stroke, but two more less severe episodes since. That is that they were considerably less severe than the first, but by no means inconsequential. In his rebuilt life he has become a first class autobiographer and in another genre fiction writer. This is the sort of story that should fortify the determination of any one of us having fallen into some form of severe health crisis. Except sadly, our own minds are likely to be so shattered or simply pre-occupied that we will fail to benefit from any memories from this amazing story about the will to recover.
This is an immensely humorous book, though of course often of a very black nature, but one that raises genuine belly laughs at that, and so it should for live is unbearable if we try to treat every unfortunate situation with only the gravity it naturally generates. It goes without saying that it also inevitably moistens one’s eyes. I felt at liberty to laugh at Catshill’s struggles, laughing with him, but taking the seriousness, the mental depression, the physical distress on-board.
In many ways this will always be a unique book, as it is rare for anyone to recover from such major trauma, and to also have the intellectual ability to subsequently write so well about the event. When the trauma is of the nature of a stroke, a literal cerebral infarction, then this book must be seen as all the more remarkable. This isn’t a some imagined third person narrative or ghost-written augmentation of the victim’s capacity, this is true, direct, gritty autobiography.
Some living individuals don’t come out of this narrative at all well, as brutal honesty extends beyond the author himself. I trust that their identities are well hidden. Arguably, biography can only be real when the wide field is truly accurate. There is no implied criticism on my part, only reason that would always prevent me getting to close to publicly disclosed personal truth. Memoir is an often-painful genre. As we read in this story, we notice how a simple sentence, spoken or written, can be totally devastating or by tone or tiny change be the greatest of empowering gifts. Recovery is always easier with the kindness of others and can hang in the balance either way on very few targeted words. The words in this book are chosen and ordered to strong affect.
January 31, 2012
A PERSONAL TRIUMPH FOR ALL TO READ
Philip Robinson was a dedicated policeman, who believed in serving others. Philip doesn't think he is a kind man, but he is just that.
At the age of 30, Philip is suddenly thrown into a battle to survive what doctors called a CVA, some call the illness a stroke. Philip worked hard to recover from his sudden illness. At the time of his stroke, his marriage was struggling. After the stroke, he and his wife worked hard to rebuild the relationship, things seemed to be getting better until his wife met a younger man at work. She was flattered by the younger man's attention, and eventually the marriage between Philip and her was destroyed.
As many other people sometimes do, Philip had many ups and downs and times of sadness and despair. He had lost his faith in Christianity as a young boy after the death of his young brother.
As an adult, Philip just couldn't come to terms with Christianity and that there was a loving God, who actually cared. However, when nothing else seemed to work for him, Philip turned to prayers. He was hesitant but waited patiently for help and comfort from his prayers to God and continued to carry on the best he could. He was hoping God had heard him when he prayed, for he was in dire need of help.
God did answer Philip's prayers and turned his entire life around for the better with happiness, laughter and another love in his life. That didn't mean, Philip did not have trying times in the future, for he surely did. But, God pulled him through, teaching him to forgive and love again. As Philip says, "I turned to God in prayer and I persevered. Prayer works. For everything I have lost, I have gained a thousand times over."
This book is not about Philip and his faith. It is about enduring suffering and surviving above all odds and learning forgiveness.
I encourage everyone to get this awesome book and read it. The words Philip writes will come in handy when & if you get in the same dire circumstances of being confused and terrified. One never knows what the future holds, does one?
Philip's success doesn't end on the last page of this book. His author profile mentions that, years later, when faced with difficulties again,..."When nothing else seemed to work..."
Philip Robinson was a dedicated policeman, who believed in serving others. Philip doesn't think he is a kind man, but he is just that.
At the age of 30, Philip is suddenly thrown into a battle to survive what doctors called a CVA, some call the illness a stroke. Philip worked hard to recover from his sudden illness. At the time of his stroke, his marriage was struggling. After the stroke, he and his wife worked hard to rebuild the relationship, things seemed to be getting better until his wife met a younger man at work. She was flattered by the younger man's attention, and eventually the marriage between Philip and her was destroyed.
As many other people sometimes do, Philip had many ups and downs and times of sadness and despair. He had lost his faith in Christianity as a young boy after the death of his young brother.
As an adult, Philip just couldn't come to terms with Christianity and that there was a loving God, who actually cared. However, when nothing else seemed to work for him, Philip turned to prayers. He was hesitant but waited patiently for help and comfort from his prayers to God and continued to carry on the best he could. He was hoping God had heard him when he prayed, for he was in dire need of help.
God did answer Philip's prayers and turned his entire life around for the better with happiness, laughter and another love in his life. That didn't mean, Philip did not have trying times in the future, for he surely did. But, God pulled him through, teaching him to forgive and love again. As Philip says, "I turned to God in prayer and I persevered. Prayer works. For everything I have lost, I have gained a thousand times over."
This book is not about Philip and his faith. It is about enduring suffering and surviving above all odds and learning forgiveness.
I encourage everyone to get this awesome book and read it. The words Philip writes will come in handy when & if you get in the same dire circumstances of being confused and terrified. One never knows what the future holds, does one?
Philip's success doesn't end on the last page of this book. His author profile mentions that, years later, when faced with difficulties again,..."When nothing else seemed to work..."
January 12, 2012
At the age of 30, Philip woke to find himself on the floor after just having survived a stroke. This is where the story begins. It’s a fascinating tale of the trials and tribulations that a stroke victim suffers as he fights his way back to some form of normality.
His emotions in tangled, he tries to understand why no-one can grasp his new language. Unable to explain his fears and the pain he suffers, he’s locked inside - alone and scared. Because his right side was paralyzed, from his face to his leg, any normal movement at the beginning was impossible.
But this man slowly applies himself to recovering his life. Step by step, he explains how he manages and what is happening to him during these days. We leave the hospital with him and move back his home where life as he knew it is now completely different. It’s a window into a nightmare none of us can visualize, but he writes it so well, we can almost imagine.
Determined to return to his job as a policeman, his pressing desire outweighs even his periodic wish to just give up and admit he can’t.
I strongly recommend this book to anyone who has either suffered a stroke, or knows or lives with someone who has experienced the horror of this ailment. It’s a personal triumph full of grit and determination - a must read!
BTW - Teasing the reader with the dream sequence was just plain naughty!!
His emotions in tangled, he tries to understand why no-one can grasp his new language. Unable to explain his fears and the pain he suffers, he’s locked inside - alone and scared. Because his right side was paralyzed, from his face to his leg, any normal movement at the beginning was impossible.
But this man slowly applies himself to recovering his life. Step by step, he explains how he manages and what is happening to him during these days. We leave the hospital with him and move back his home where life as he knew it is now completely different. It’s a window into a nightmare none of us can visualize, but he writes it so well, we can almost imagine.
Determined to return to his job as a policeman, his pressing desire outweighs even his periodic wish to just give up and admit he can’t.
I strongly recommend this book to anyone who has either suffered a stroke, or knows or lives with someone who has experienced the horror of this ailment. It’s a personal triumph full of grit and determination - a must read!
BTW - Teasing the reader with the dream sequence was just plain naughty!!
December 31, 2011
Another great read by one of my favorite auhtors!
June 25, 2019
We are proud to announce that NEVER SAY I CAN'T by Phillip Catshill is a B.R.A.G.Medallion Honoree. This tells readers that this book is well worth their time and money!
August 8, 2025
AIBA Book of the Week: 2 June, 2024: 503/43705
Awesome Indies Book Awards is pleased to include Never Say I Can't (…after Stroke) by Philip Catshill in the library of Awesome Indies Book Awards' Seal of Excellence recipients.
Assessed for Awesome Indies Book Awards
29/01/2019
Assessor 43489 :
The title of this book Never Say I Can’t is a clue to the overall essence of the author’s own story of what he endured following a stroke at the young age of thirty. I found it fascinating to read what went through his mind as he fought his way into some sense of normalcy during his struggle from being ‘just a stroke victim’ to becoming a real person again.
“Every word I’d ever learned had been stripped out of memory. Not only had the words gone, but also any memory that words existed had gone with them.”
A nightmare that I could not have visualized or understood before reading the book.
“She explained in the talk-slow, talk-loud manner people reserve for foreigners and imbeciles.”
One can picture this happening.
“I went from absolute bliss to utter sadness at the flick of a switch.”
My heart went out to him.
Written in an unfiltered, honest, and often humorous manner, the author’s gripping recount of his battle with this devastating medical nightmare gives insight that, unless having gone through a similar experience, one would never understand. Imagine sensing you’re encased in a thick, black fog with only a tiny, intense pinprick of light to provide comfort. Read this book to discover what that feels like.
Never Say I Can’t is a well-written, easy to read, properly edited book that is consistent with traditionally published ones. Not only is it an enlightening account of what a stroke victim goes through, but it also provides insight to caregivers and those close to a stroke victim as to how to treat someone under similar circumstances.
Never Say I Can’t deserves five out of five stars in my opinion.
Awesome Indies Book Awards is pleased to include Never Say I Can't (…after Stroke) by Philip Catshill in the library of Awesome Indies Book Awards' Seal of Excellence recipients.
Assessed for Awesome Indies Book Awards
29/01/2019
Assessor 43489 :
The title of this book Never Say I Can’t is a clue to the overall essence of the author’s own story of what he endured following a stroke at the young age of thirty. I found it fascinating to read what went through his mind as he fought his way into some sense of normalcy during his struggle from being ‘just a stroke victim’ to becoming a real person again.
“Every word I’d ever learned had been stripped out of memory. Not only had the words gone, but also any memory that words existed had gone with them.”
A nightmare that I could not have visualized or understood before reading the book.
“She explained in the talk-slow, talk-loud manner people reserve for foreigners and imbeciles.”
One can picture this happening.
“I went from absolute bliss to utter sadness at the flick of a switch.”
My heart went out to him.
Written in an unfiltered, honest, and often humorous manner, the author’s gripping recount of his battle with this devastating medical nightmare gives insight that, unless having gone through a similar experience, one would never understand. Imagine sensing you’re encased in a thick, black fog with only a tiny, intense pinprick of light to provide comfort. Read this book to discover what that feels like.
Never Say I Can’t is a well-written, easy to read, properly edited book that is consistent with traditionally published ones. Not only is it an enlightening account of what a stroke victim goes through, but it also provides insight to caregivers and those close to a stroke victim as to how to treat someone under similar circumstances.
Never Say I Can’t deserves five out of five stars in my opinion.
May 21, 2019
A very informative book written by a stroke survivor. I learned a lot from this book. If you or a family member has had a stroke this book can help you understand what they went or are going through. I enjoyed the book and recommend it to others.
February 18, 2012
I FOUND C.V.A A HARD WAY BACK an excellent read it gives an insight into how a stroke victim feels and thinks everyone should read this book it is a book that makes you think just what it is to take your health for granted and as the stroke victim was only a very young man it is even harder to realize what a traumer he went through but, having said that there is an underlying humour there too, with a certain windy incident in the hospital that had me crying with laughter as did my grandson when i gave him the passage to read everyone should read this wonderful book if you know anyone who has suffered a stroke or not you will realize there but for the grace of God go i.this book deserves10 stars.
March 27, 2016
This novel opened up my eyes to what it is like for a person to experience a major stroke. The author survived a major stroke at the age of 30 and was eventually able to write about it in this novel about that eighteen month time period. The loss of words, the way people react to a person with a disability, the struggle against prejudice from people who have had stroke, too, are heartbreaking reminders to be mindful of others. Philip Catshill's novel is well-written. I highly recommend his novels to everyone.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews