The Blondes

Sep 22, 2012 karen rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: girls-gone-wild, upstairs-neighbors

here- enjoy one of the few pictures of me as a blonde that exist, and know that if i were a character in this book, i would totally attack you...

this is one of those books whose reality you just have to accept. otherwise, you are going to hate it and your brain is not going to be able to get over the "that's not how science works!!" elements.

because to a biologist, spec. a geneticist, this book is cuckoo-bananas. a "plague" descends on the world, but it only affects blonde women and girls. there...more

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Jul 18, 2012 Mandy P rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: canadiana, contemporary-fiction, goodreads-giveaways-first-reads

*Disclosure: I received an advance copy of this book as a Goodreads Giveaways winner.

The synopsis alone got me. A world gone mad? Check. An examination of gendered assumptions about beauty and relationships? Check. Plucky academic female protagonist? Check.

I can't express how hard it was to put this book down once I started reading it. Schultz's examinations of the paranoia surrounding disease (think Swine Flu, only worse), reproductive rights (Hayes doesn't tell the father of her child that she...more

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Sep 23, 2012 Lela rated it 2 of 5 stars

Broken into three parts, the narrative moves forward and backwards in time as the main character, Hazel, speaks to her pregnant belly, relating the events of what brought her to be where she is. The world is in chaos as a strange epidemic has taken over women, targeting blonde women in particular. It causes a rabid-like effect, where the victim's mind is effectively "bleached", and what ensues are random attacks on innocent bystanders. Sounds like an action-packed novel, but to be honest, I real...more

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Sep 03, 2012 Carole rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: books-read-in-2012

While I was reading this book, I was thinking how reminiscent of "The Handmaid's Tale" it was. Then, when I went to enter it on my books list, I read the blurb about it and it said the same thing!

This by no means takes away from the creativity, the cleverness or the readability of Schultz's book. Her story focuses on a young woman caught up in the terrorizing throes of a world-wide pandemic that seems to infect only blondes (think SARS multiplied many, many times). She has the misfortune to have...more

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Dec 09, 2012 Scotchneat rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: sci-fi-fantasy, canadia

A breakout novel for a young writer whose last book was shortlisted for the Trillium Prize alongside Anne Michaels and Margaret Atwood, and whom the Toronto Star called a "force of nature."
With the title and cover blub, I expected something more ...cheeky?

A sort of plague takes over major population centers and it becomes apparent it's turning blonde females into crazed killers. Hazel Hayes is living in New York, finds out she's pregnant, and wants to get back to Toronto to tell the father (her...more

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Sep 29, 2012 Elvina Barclay rated it 4 of 5 stars

Hazel Hayes goes to NYC to work on her doctoral thesis and shortly after she arrives she finds she is pregnant, by her thesis advisor from Toronto. The day she finds out, the world is struck by an outbreak of a SARS type virus that seems to affect only blonde women. The virus turns them into crazed killers and soon enough the population is shaving their heads and dying their hair to avoid the plague.
Hazel decides to tell the father of her child that she is pregnant and return to Toronto, but cir...more

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Jan 29, 2013 Barbara rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: can-lit, fiction, dystopia

A story where women, particularly blonde women, have become the deliverers of death. The cover of the book is gorgeous and there are some particularly piercing observations and descriptions of New York: "There's the black corsetry of fire escapes, a symphony of car honks, and the way all the florists and corner stores arrange their carnations and lilies on pedestals with bows, as if any given weekday is as important as prom night" (24).

Still, I wanted the story to be elevated to another level. R...more

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Nov 06, 2012 Renee Layberry rated it 3 of 5 stars

The premise for the story was equal parts outrageous and probable, and the multiple layers to the story worked well together with consistency. The characters were believable without needing to be over-explained, and the protagonist was easy to relate to without demanding that I crawl into her skin and see and feel everything that she was experiencing. The dialogue was very natural and went a long way towards giving me a good sense for the personalities of the characters, and the way the story un...more

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Mar 21, 2012 Suzanne rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: canadian, books-i-own

They say that blondes have more fun, but do they also tend to go crazy and turn into rabid killers? The Blondes follows NYC grad student Hazel Hayes, who finds out that she’s pregnant at just about the worst time ever: a strange illness is running rampant in the city and around the world, transforming blondes (both natural and dyed) into crazed attackers, like dogs with rabies.

So while the world is in a state of panic because of the “Blonde Fury”, Hazel is still trying to work on her thesis (whi...more

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Mar 26, 2013 Becca M rated it 1 of 5 stars

One of the worst books I have ever read. Total garbage. I'm surprised I didn't abandon it, but thats mainly because I didn't have another book waiting. The writing is painfully bad, at a sentence level. However, there are larger problems with this novel as well. The "Blonde Fury" is never clearly defined and attempts to describe a scientific basis for the 'mysterious illness affecting only white, blonde women (both natural and dyed)' is quarter-assed at best. That wouldn't necessarily be a probl...more One of the worst books I have ever read. Total garbage. I'm surprised I didn't abandon it, but thats mainly because I didn't have another book waiting. The writing is painfully bad, at a sentence level. However, there are larger problems with this novel as well. The "Blonde Fury" is never clearly defined and attempts to describe a scientific basis for the 'mysterious illness affecting only white, blonde women (both natural and dyed)' is quarter-assed at best. That wouldn't necessarily be a problem, but the prose itself is not strong enough to carry such a vague idea. If its a metaphor for something, I certainly couldn't tell. The dangers of being too preoccupied with shallow aesthetic pursuits? That's reaching. Again, lack of a 'moral lesson' isn't necessarily a bad thing in all fiction, but it certainly seems like this author is grasping for a larger idea. The fact that it falls so short of this goal is what makes that a problem here.
I also couldn't help but come away from this book feeling like I had just read an opus on 'reverse racism.' Like I said before, there is no clear moral theme running through the book, but there certainly are a number of vignettes describing discrimination faced by blonde, white women as the disease reaches epidemic level. It doesn't come off as a useful comment on actual racism, just "oh these poor white women are being discriminated against for things they can't help!" Again, might be okay if it didn't seem like the author was trying really hard to say something about oppression and 'othering.' This, coupled with two extremely bizarre and off-putting instances where people of color are described or implied, had me cringing several times throughout.
At one point during the introduction of a new character, our narrator pauses to say something to the effect of "I had been too wrapped up in my own problems to notice she was black." And then the story continues. WHAT?
Later, a line of dialogue from a person down using a pay phone down the street from the narrator is included fo absolutely no reason, "Nigga what the fuck nigga! I don't know nigga!" (might not be those words exactly but thats the gist) I'm sorry, WHAT????? This scene had, no, and I mean NO relevance to the actual plot. But it sure gave a white person a chance to say the n-word!
These scenes are out of context here, but believe me, they seem just as out of context in the book too.

I finished this book with so many questions: How did this book get published? How does this editor have a job? Who told Emily Schultz she should seriously go after a writing career? Can I have my 5 bucks back? Comparisons to Margaret Atwood make me cringe. In your WILDEST dreams, Emily Schultz. The narrator has no personality, the other characters barely do either, the subplots are cringeworthy, the tension is nonexistent and the pacing atrocious, the author clearly did minimal research before writing this shitty, weirdly racist piece of garbage. To top it off, this book had no conclusion!! It just kind of... peters out, as though Schultz was simply bored of writing. I mean, hell I was certainly bored of reading it but after all that work I feel I deserved more than an open-ending.

I only wish I hadn't bought it in ebook format so I could throw it in a bonfire or take a shit on it.(less)

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Mar 18, 2013 Deanna McFadden rated it 5 of 5 stars

I have no words for how much I loved this book--it's a mash-up for sure, of pop culture, of literary fiction, of satirical horror (is that even a genre?)--but Emily Schultz's writing is just terrific.

The Actual Blog Post:

In The Blondes, Emily Schultz has written a terrific, original novel. I think, in my perfect pop culture world, it's exactly my kind of book. The writing is great, the story is compelling, and it's fresh in its tone. Hazel, a Phd student in film, embarks upon post-grad work in...more I have no words for how much I loved this book--it's a mash-up for sure, of pop culture, of literary fiction, of satirical horror (is that even a genre?)--but Emily Schultz's writing is just terrific.

The Actual Blog Post:

In The Blondes, Emily Schultz has written a terrific, original novel. I think, in my perfect pop culture world, it's exactly my kind of book. The writing is great, the story is compelling, and it's fresh in its tone. Hazel, a Phd student in film, embarks upon post-grad work in New York City. She's left behind a disastrous relationship with her faculty adviser, the aptly renamed Karl Mann (having changed his moniker from Dichlicher [sp]), and has just found out she's pregnant. Accident or no, finding yourself up the duff at the very moment of an apocalypse, well, it's not terrific luck.

The epidemic starts with just one or two incidents--blonde women losing it both literally and metaphorically as a result of a virus that soon turns the world into a place where any light-headed person, peroxided or not, could fall victim. Hazel, a natural light-haired red-head, soon finds herself face-to-face with the kinds of situations most familiar to people who have seen and studied Danny Boyle's 28 Days Later. North America on lockdown, Hazel tries to get home, and she ends up at a government run containment centre with other women who may or may not develop the virus, SHV.

Government officials let her out, eventually. And this part of the book eerily reminded me of Blindness, the moment when the government fully admits that it no longer has control over the situation. She manages to get herself back to Toronto, to see her best friend, but then, from there, it seems that everyone, anyone will do what it takes to survive. I'm making the book feel more Walking Dead than it actually is--there's great humour here, a lot of laugh out loud, smart revelations by the writer. It's funny, essentially, the novel is epistolary in format, Hazel's retelling the story to her unborn child. And she moves back and forth from events deeper into the past and from where she is at the moment--in a cottage owned by her ex-lover and his wife, Grace.

All in all, if you are looking for an intelligent mash up of 28 Days Later without the terrifically horror elements, with a dash of Blindness, as above, with a wholly original, satirical point of view, The Blondes is the book for you. I, for one, would love to see Sarah Polley make this into a movie, because I think it would be great fun on the big screen.(less)

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Feb 11, 2013 Maya rated it 2 of 5 stars

This book was advertised with far too much hype. The "next Margaret Atwood" - I wish!
The biggest problem with The Blondes is the heroine. She did not engage me in any way - no, that's actually not true, she irritated me on numerous occasions. What drives her through the events, is her desire to abort an unwanted pregnancy; one wonders if she knew how babies are made in the first place. She did not give any thought to a possibility of becoming pregnant when she started an affair with a married ma...more

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Jan 06, 2013 Catherine rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: feminism, fiction, science-fiction

The Blondes is about Hazel Hayes, an academic who in is NY when a pandemic like rabies spreads through the world. In this case, the disease only seems to attack blondes and those who shave are less likely to become infected. Throughout the story, the details are vague and the science is unclear. The more interesting part is how society reacts.

I thought this would be much more exciting and more of a popular fiction type of novel, but it definitely seems to stray more toward being a high brow or...more

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Aug 16, 2012 Kara rated it 4 of 5 stars

As seen on: Bookosaur

In Emily Schultz's new novel, we are introduced to Hazel Hayes, who is recounting her story to her unborn baby from an isolated cottage in Northern Ontario. The beginning of the story finds grad student Hazel Hayes in New York City to work on her thesis, but academia is the last thing on her mind. Hazel has just found out she's pregnant, the by-product of an awkward affair with her already married and much older thesis adviser. On the same day that the little pee stick revea...more As seen on: Bookosaur

In Emily Schultz's new novel, we are introduced to Hazel Hayes, who is recounting her story to her unborn baby from an isolated cottage in Northern Ontario. The beginning of the story finds grad student Hazel Hayes in New York City to work on her thesis, but academia is the last thing on her mind. Hazel has just found out she's pregnant, the by-product of an awkward affair with her already married and much older thesis adviser. On the same day that the little pee stick reveals a pink plus sign, Hazel witnesses an attack in the subway station; a professional looking blonde woman physically assaults a teenaged girl for no apparent reason. What begins as a seemingly isolated attack in the subway tunnels of NYC quickly reveals itself to be a worldwide pandemic. Women all over the world, specifically blonde-haired women, are becoming infected with "The Blonde Fury", a disease that causes its host to fall into a rage-filled hysteria and violently attack anyone who happens to be in the danger zone. Amidst the attacks, paranoia, and chaos, Hazel attempts to travel safely home to Toronto, but as a redhead with fair skin, she falls under the scrutiny of both the government and the general public.

I quite enjoyed The Blondes , but I think it's important to note that a prerequisite to increasing your reading pleasure is having the right mentality. Try not to look too far into the explanation of the Blonde Fury. I found myself questioning the scientific reasoning behind the disease, but I was enjoying the book so much that in the end I didn't care if it added up or not. I majored in English, after all, not science, and though I've watched my fair share of Bill Nye the Science Guy, Schultz likely could have told me anything and I would have believed her if it sounded smart enough.

Also, don't take this one too seriously. I mean, of all the potential zombie-like infestations this one doesn't rank very high on the creep-o-meter. Picturing a bunch of crazed blondes running around, fake eyelashes hanging on by a thread, red lipstick smeared on teeth, delivering fatal blows with the swift stomp of a stiletto, while people run away in fear screaming, "Here come the BLONDES!" is laughable, not terrifying, but just go with it. From what I can gather, it's not supposed to be taken seriously, or even supposed to be terrifying in a Texas Chainsaw Massacre kind of way, as it's not so much a novel about the pandemic itself as it is about relationships - relationships between women, between men and women, between strangers, and so on - and a social commentary of sorts. There seems to be an undertone in the novel that even in the worst of times, even when the unthinkable is happening right before your eyes, looks are still important. I spent a lot of time thinking about Schultz's motives. Is there a reason she singled out blondes? And blonde women in particular? Is it because, since the days of Jean Harlow and Marilyn Monroe, blondes are often associated with beauty?

Whatever the motives, I pushed these questions to the side, leaving them for someone with a more analytical mind, and I'm left with two more thoughts on this book: (1) the novel certainly gives new meaning to the saying, "pain is beauty and beauty is pain", because that oh-so-beautiful blonde is currently gouging someone's eye out with a perfectly manicured fingernail; and (2) One thing's for certain, when blondes can transform into homicidal crazed killers, gentlemen, most certainly, do not prefer blondes. (Sorry, Marilyn.)

Blondes, brunettes, redheads - whatever your hair colour may be - this is one to read.(less)

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Jul 17, 2012 Donna Parker rated it 3 of 5 stars

Blondes infected by a virus, rampaging, maiming, infecting, and even killing others. A young academic, pregnant, confused, frightened, and conflicted. The world struggling with a deadly, complex, and divisive pandemic. Easy to make this comedic, it has all the elements, but the author choose instead to explore issues that we take for granted, things we think of as rights, which are to a great extent more fragile and vulnerable than many suspect: freedom, security, and reproductive health. Concer...more

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Jul 26, 2012 Emma rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: owned-books, arcs

I received this book through a giveaway hosted by Goodreads, from Random House Canada.

The idea for this book was what attracted me and compelled me to enter the contest on Goodreads. This novel was like a breath of fresh air. It was a lovely break from all the Dystopian books floating around. The story took place during a time when life as we knew it disappeared, and all hell breaks loose, instead of a typical Dystopian story which normally takes place after an apocalypse. Although this is an Ad...more

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Jul 26, 2012 Lex (Eyes on the Pages) rated it 2 of 5 stars

More reviews at: www.eyesonthepages.blogspot.ca

When I read the premise for The Blondes, I expected it to be a somewhat funny book. Instead, I got the complete opposite of that. The tone for the whole book was serious and all I could think of through the whole thing was, "Someone is actually taking this plot seriously? Okaaaay." Which, therefore set the tone for me and caused me to give this book to Dull Eyed review.

Because of the difference between what I was expecting from this book and what I...more More reviews at: www.eyesonthepages.blogspot.ca

When I read the premise for The Blondes, I expected it to be a somewhat funny book. Instead, I got the complete opposite of that. The tone for the whole book was serious and all I could think of through the whole thing was, "Someone is actually taking this plot seriously? Okaaaay." Which, therefore set the tone for me and caused me to give this book to Dull Eyed review.

Because of the difference between what I was expecting from this book and what I got from it are two completely different polar opposites, it made it really hard for me to get into the book and took me forever to read. Now, I'm not saying that this book is bad in anyway, and it did somehow get more interesting towards the end of the book, but as I said, I just had a hard time getting into it.

I will admit, I first entered the contest on Goodreads because of the cover of this book. I mean, I've never seen anything like it with all of those hair sample colours and it just looked so... cool. Let me tell you, that will probably be the first and last time I ever pick up a book based on it's cover.

I found the pacing of this book to be really slow and almost unbearable at points. Nothing really intrigued me or had me dying to turn the next page.... And the chapters were just so long! I don't know about you guys, but I hate long chapters (Anything over 10 pages I consider long chapters). I find that short chapters in a book make me feel like I accomplish more and also help me to continue reading a book late at night.

The story is told in first person by Hazel to her un-born child, re-accounting memories from just before the Blonde Plague took over up to when she finally has the child. The book almost seemed like an auto-biography of her life (which I guess it was), with stories that kind of jumped from one time frame to another. I believe at one point their were three or so different time-line stories occurring.

All in all, I didn't really enjoy this book because my expectations were so botched that it just kind of ruined the book for me. If I had different expectations, I'm sure I would have enjoyed this book much more than I had.(less)

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Aug 30, 2012 Zara rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: fiction, own, review-list

The Blondes by Emily Schultz is an entertaining story about the unexpected contagion that affects blonde-haired women, causing them to first suffer from headaches and nausea until they reach such a rabid state that ultimately causes them to lash out in violence, committing both injury and murder.

The narrator is a young university student named Hazel Hayes undergoing her postgraduate studies and working on a thesis on beautiful women in a female-marketed-culture—except, not only is she alone and...more

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Jul 17, 2012 Trish rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: first-reads, canada-author-theme

Disclosure: I was sent a copy of this book as part of a First Reads giveaway hosted by Random House.

The Blondes is the story of a socially awkward graduate student, Hazel Hayes, who finds herself pregnant and alone in New York City during a pandemic that has the ability to turn blondes into crazed killers. Struggling with her impending motherhood and trying to avoid the ramifications of the plague, Hazel embarks on a journey full of twists and turns, experiencing sorrow and having some strangely...more Disclosure: I was sent a copy of this book as part of a First Reads giveaway hosted by Random House.

The Blondes is the story of a socially awkward graduate student, Hazel Hayes, who finds herself pregnant and alone in New York City during a pandemic that has the ability to turn blondes into crazed killers. Struggling with her impending motherhood and trying to avoid the ramifications of the plague, Hazel embarks on a journey full of twists and turns, experiencing sorrow and having some strangely funny experiences only to find safety and personal contentment in the most unexpected of places.

Schultz's novel utilizes a plague narrative with an apocalyptic theme to provide a biting social commentary on supposedly adult relationships, the academic world, and society while avoiding the cliches often associated with these narratives. Schultz's prose is clear and witty, and she does an excellent job of developing her characters. At many points throughout the novel, I found myself having strong mixed emotions about Hazel, a sure sign of a complex character that the reader can relate to. The relationships between the women in this novel were excellent as well, demonstrating Schultz's ability to grasp how women interact with each other and portray it in a realistic way.

Perhaps most of all, I enjoyed the critique of the academic/scholarly world that both defines and constrains Hazel and her relationships with society and the people she knows. Schultz is dead on when she describes Hazel's feelings of inferiority and confusion when meeting with the icy Dr Kovacs and trying to find the words to describe a project that is until that point just definintions, key phrases, and ideas she has written on papers and must figure out how to put it all together into one coherent thought. Oh, the graduate student in me certainly recognized that, and there were moments where I could identify my own behaviours and fears as reflected in Hazel.

I am definitely going to recommend this book to my friends, especially those who have slogged through the academic trenches with me, as I think they will find it just as sharp and enlightening as I did. A great read and definitely a writer to watch.(less)

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Jan 12, 2013 Meaghan rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: canadian, science-fiction

This book has all the makings of a good feminist commentary: a pregnant protagonist who's writing a thesis on images of women in advertising, a plague that affects only blonde women, and an almost 100% female cast of characters. And yet, as far as I can see, it somehow fails to make any kind of deep statement about the treatment of women and their bodies in our society. Women are shunned and/or quarantined for appearing "hysterical," which you would think would be a ripe opportunity for satire,...more

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Nov 08, 2012 Alexis rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2012

Part satire, part dystopian novel, part examination of female relationships and psyche. The narrator, Hazel Hayes, finds herself pregnant in New York City after an affair with her married thesis advisor. At the same time, a virus attacks blonde women and makes them act rabid. They turn violent and attack people.

Hazel eventually leaves New York and returns to Toronto. This is part thriller, but there is also a look at how the media and female psyche play into this, and how the women are dehumaniz...more

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Sep 14, 2012 Corey rated it 5 of 5 stars

Because Blondes is every fashionista's worst nightmare come true. A mysterious virus begins infecting women with blonde hair (even those who've gained blondedom through dyeing), turning them into violent mindless people who attack at random, and kill without a second thought. Kind of like a zombie novel with split ends. Ba-zing!

Schultz being Schultz, however — which means, being the author of Joyland: A Novel and Heaven Is Small, that she is a damned talented individual — there is far greater de...more

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Sep 12, 2012 Lydia Laceby rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: canadian

Originally reviewed at Novel Escapes

I loved this novel. With a unique premise – blondes becoming rapid killers (think zombies, but exchange the ugly for beautiful blondes) - and fabulous social commentary (think The Handmaid’s Tale), The Blondes is an absorbing read.

Hazel Hayes is an ordinary girl who moves from Toronto to New York City to finish her thesis on women and vanity when she finds herself pregnant just as the world becomes consumed with hysterical, raging blondes wreaking havoc and at...more Originally reviewed at Novel Escapes

I loved this novel. With a unique premise – blondes becoming rapid killers (think zombies, but exchange the ugly for beautiful blondes) - and fabulous social commentary (think The Handmaid’s Tale), The Blondes is an absorbing read.

Hazel Hayes is an ordinary girl who moves from Toronto to New York City to finish her thesis on women and vanity when she finds herself pregnant just as the world becomes consumed with hysterical, raging blondes wreaking havoc and attacking people. Anyone living in Toronto during SARS or the Bird Flu scare or anywhere during a potential pandemic will understand the fear, the unknown and the desperation portrayed in this novel. The Blondes takes it a step further by exploring an illness that affects only women, particularly blondes, both natural and bleached, and how the rest of the world, from brunettes to men, react to them, their vanity at having to shave their heads, and the discrimination, the persecution, and the indignities they are treated to.

Told from the point of view of Hazel Hayes, whose pregnancy was unplanned, she gradually tells her unborn baby about how the events unfolded to get them to the cabin they were hunkered down in. Hazel starts her story at the cabin and then would skip back to various points in time from how the infections began, to how she met the baby’s father and moved to New York and other times in her past. However, at no time was I confused or thought this detracted from the story. It was masterfully done. I zipped through pages to see whether she would make it out of the cabin and was equally fascinated by how the infection started, spread and the reaction to it as well as the dysfunctional relationship she had with the baby’s father.

I loved that I learned things with this novel, from Mayer of MGM studio’s hometown in Canada to the genetic facts of how a calico cat is created. And that this novel made me think, from our vanity to the niceties people show pregnant women they would never otherwise glance twice at and the irrationality or compassion people show in the face of the unknown.

I visited New York City recently and with Manhattan firmly imprinted in my mind now, I loved that half of this novel takes place in the streets I recently roamed, and the other half was unabashedly Canadian and depicted areas of the city I live in as well as other Canadian-isms (Tim Horton’s anyone?) that I absolutely loved.

There were pages of the Blondes that I whipped through as well as sections I reread to digest the meaning and subtext. Emily Schultz is definitely one to watch. I can’t wait to read more of her work!

Thank you to DoubleDay Canada for our review copy! All opinions are our own.

(less)

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Oct 22, 2012 Michele rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: genre-fiction, city-toronto, city-nyc, 2012-50bookpledge

This, and other reviews can be found on my blog Just a Lil' Lost

Hazel has moved to New York City to work on her thesis when she finds out that she's pregnant with a married man's baby. The affair with her professor/thesis advisor is made more dire when a string of bizarre attacks start happening worldwide. The strange disease seems to be affecting women with blonde hair and turns them into vicious killers. Hazel must struggle to find her way home to Toronto and wrestle with the dilemma of whethe...more This, and other reviews can be found on my blog Just a Lil' Lost

Hazel has moved to New York City to work on her thesis when she finds out that she's pregnant with a married man's baby. The affair with her professor/thesis advisor is made more dire when a string of bizarre attacks start happening worldwide. The strange disease seems to be affecting women with blonde hair and turns them into vicious killers. Hazel must struggle to find her way home to Toronto and wrestle with the dilemma of whether to tell the father about her pregnancy.

After having just finished reading James Patterson's Zoo where animals go crazy and attack everyone, I don't know if I was prepared to read a book where blonde women go crazy and attack everyone. Even from the book jacket premise, I wasn't sure what to expect withThe Blondes and Schultz's novel proved to be a mix of heartfelt emotion, traumatic experiences and edge-of-your-seat paranoia. I hadn't realized when I started it that the novel was set in New York City and Toronto, which was a pleasant surprise.

Told in the voice of Hazel speaking to her unborn child, the narrative jumps frequently between the present, recent past and even further past. This was a nice way to break up the story and keep the pace going & discovery of facts timed right but I found it a bit jarring at times, to figure out what point Hazel's life this particular moment was at and how it related to everything else in that moment. I also felt that what Hazel was saying didn't always seem particularly appropriate to be telling her child, unborn or not. Perhaps Hazel doesn't find it bizarre telling her baby about the details of her and the father's relations but I found it a bit disturbing and inappropriate.

While I felt the ending left things a bit unresolved, I enjoyed the overall journey of getting there. Schultz establishes some great characters with very real and believable personalities given the scenarios and circumstances they find themselves in. I also loved that Hazel's thesis and major was on aesthetics, and the idea of aesthetics become such a big factor in the story - the paranoia, judgement and treatment of those with a certain look about them.(less)

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Dec 27, 2012 Christa (More Than Just Magic) rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2012, genre-contemporary, canlit, genre-magical-realism, own, publisher-randomhouse, sent-for-review

This review originally posted at More Than Just Magic

When I first heard about The Blondes, it sounded quirky, and dark, and exciting and kind of strange and they compared it to The Handmaid’s Tale. It sounded amazing! It sounded like exactly the kind of book I love and it was. It was a unique and incredibly thought provoking read, and while I recognize that it may not be for everyone, I can’t stop singing its praises.

The Blondes is the story of one, Hazel Hayes. Pregnant and alone with her marri...more This review originally posted at More Than Just Magic

When I first heard about The Blondes, it sounded quirky, and dark, and exciting and kind of strange and they compared it to The Handmaid’s Tale. It sounded amazing! It sounded like exactly the kind of book I love and it was. It was a unique and incredibly thought provoking read, and while I recognize that it may not be for everyone, I can’t stop singing its praises.

The Blondes is the story of one, Hazel Hayes. Pregnant and alone with her married professor’s baby, she finds herself in the midst of an outbreak unlike anything the world has ever seen before. But what I found really interesting, was even though the story was technically about her, and she was the narrator, it was also about women in general. There was a lot I could relate to, and I lot that gave me pause to think about how women are perceived in society and how they perceive themselves.

Though the description of The Blondes mentions its similarities to The Handmaid’s Tale it was actually another Margaret Atwood novel that came to mind while I was reading. The Edible Woman. I thought these two books shared the same quirky writing style, using distinctive narrative voices and some odd metaphors, to communicate a lot of their ideas and themes. And I think that what I took away from both books was roughly the same. I thought it was interesting the way Hazel Hayes was shaped by the people and events around her, and how she felt about that. I loved the way Emily Schultz approached the idea of pregnancy and what it means to be a mother (or what we’re supposed to think it means) and most of all I loved how The Blondes looks at beauty. What it is, why it’s important and the violence of it all. I think this book is ripe for discussion and interpretation and I think no two people will read it exactly the same.

Most of all I liked the character of Hazel. She’s in no way a perfect person. She had an affair, she’s kind of a complainer, she’s head-strong and stubborn. The list goes on. But the reason I like her is because she is so flawed. She’s interesting to read about and her story is compelling. And like her or not, you want to know what happens to her. She’s a character that made me curious and after I was finished reading I often found myself wondering what happened to her. I love when I book keeps me thinking and dreaming long after I’ve turned the last page.

One word of warning, however, be prepared to suspend your disbelief. Though Schultz gives some explanation of how the disease (a.k.a Blond Fury) in The Blondes comes about, it still seemed really far-fetched. A tiny voice in the back of my head kept nagging me that this would never be possible. My advice for you is to ignore that voice. You’ll enjoy the novel so much more without it.

Recommendation: Highly recommended for fans of Margaret Atwood and literary book clubs. It’s a quirky book though, so be prepared for some unusual reading.(less)

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Oct 23, 2012 Laima rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: canadian-authors, 2012-reading-challenge, great-eh

The Blondes by Emily Schultz

This is a story about a virus which suddenly befalls women with blonde hair. It doesn’t matter if the hair is naturally blonde, dyed, highlighted or if the female is young or old. The illness causes those afflicted to become violent with rage, attacking everyone in their path. The military is called in to control and quarantine those suspected with the Blonde Rage. Although the plot is quite farfetched, the atmosphere and feeling of panic and suspicion which builds in...more

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Aug 23, 2012 Andrea (Cozy Up With A Good Read) rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: books-i-own

This review and others can be found on Cozy Up With A Good Read

Wow, what to even say about this book. I've been hearing quite a bit about it lately and was definitely intrigued by the hype. The idea of an illness affecting blondes in the world and turning them into killers, I needed to get my hands on this book. The narration of the story hooked me in right away. The whole story is told from Hazel's point of view as she is telling her story to her unborn child. I felt that everything was more de...more This review and others can be found on Cozy Up With A Good Read

Wow, what to even say about this book. I've been hearing quite a bit about it lately and was definitely intrigued by the hype. The idea of an illness affecting blondes in the world and turning them into killers, I needed to get my hands on this book. The narration of the story hooked me in right away. The whole story is told from Hazel's point of view as she is telling her story to her unborn child. I felt that everything was more descriptive because it's hearing the story told from a first hand point of view.

I really enjoyed how the epidemic is the main idea of the story but the biggest point is how Hazel deals with everything in her vulnerable position. It felt like there were two parallel stories happening. It was interesting to see the back and forth to where she is now and her story of how she dealt with getting there. What I really love about this book is that it Schultz delves deep into the psyche to show how people would react to a disaster like this, it's scary to see what the world turns into.

Schultz did a great job making the disease seem believable, she brings the science out and explains how something like this could be possible. I've read a few books where there is no explanation as to how something happened, and I find it's easier to enjoy the story if you can the author makes it plausible.

We follow Hazel on her journey trying to find the person who will help her through her turmoil in the time of the attacks which are always random. I loved that you could never expect an attack to happen, Schultz shows the unpredictability of the world. The descriptions of things are creepy and really make you want to keep your eyes open throughout the story just waiting for something else to happen. I felt like while I was reading this I would get lost in the story and forget about the attacks and then something big would happen again.

The best part of the book for me was the ending, usually I don't like open endings, but this one just felt right. Schultz really leaves readers wondering what will happen now after Hazel has basically been through hell and back. This is a book I will recommend to everyone I know, it was fun with some great humour and beautiful writing!(less)

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Sep 16, 2012 Kendra rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: favorites

Emily Schultz has done it again. She's delivered a quirky novel that examines our society and values through whacked-out, supernatural situations. The Blondes takes you on a ride with Hazel Hayes, displaced Canadian living the hazy, wandering student life in New York. After a breakout of a new strain of rabies-like disease, affecting only blonde-headed (dyed or natural) upper-middle class women, Hazel goes on a cross-nation journey with many bumps along the way.

The character of Hazel is both en...more

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Sep 13, 2012 Pearl rated it 2 of 5 stars

I was really hoping to like this book but simply found it to drag on and on. The entire book felt like a melodramatic monologue since the main character was retelling the events of her last year to her unborn baby.

And the ending was, IMHO, anti-climactic so I felt let down that I stuck through the entirety of the book.

And maybe this was the point the author was trying to make but I ended up thinking that Hazel Hayes was more vile than a blonde who has caught the fury because she was just seemed...more

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May 07, 2012 Tamar rated it 5 of 5 stars

This was an amazing tale of a Canadian living in America trying to get an abortion while a pandemic sweeps across the planet. I hate when people say books are very Handmaid's Tale-esque but this book is quite similar in the way it raises questions about the state of women and reproductive rights against an unreal, (dare I say) 'dystopian' background (the Canadianess of it helps to beg comparisons). The characterization & voice of the narrator is perfection. Read with your cranky feminist gla...more

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