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Healing Your Emotional Self: A Powerful Program to Help You Raise Your Self-Esteem, Quiet Your Inner Critic, and Overcome Your Shame
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Healing Your Emotional Self: A Powerful Program to Help You Raise Your Self-Esteem, Quiet Your Inner Critic, and Overcome Your Shame

4.0 of 5 stars 4.00  ·  rating details  ·  252 ratings  ·  12 reviews
"Emotionally abusive parents are indeed toxic parents, and they cause significant damage to their children's self-esteem, self-image, and body image. In this remarkable book, Beverly Engel shares her powerful Mirror Therapy program for helping adult survivors to overcome their shame and self-criticism, become more compassionate and accepting of themselves, and create a mor ...more
Hardcover, 259 pages
Published February 1st 2006 by John Wiley & Sons (first published January 31st 2006)
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This book was recommended to me by my therapist. It was extremely informative and in this regard was helpful, however, more often than not I found myself at odds with authors conclusions, which seem to be primarily dualistic in nature, suggesting that there is a "true self" beyond the traumas one experienced and beneath depression, that there is a personality separate from one's experiences and events. We are nothing other than our material reality.The traumas one experiences is precisely what c ...more
Jun 08, 2015 S added it

Because they are so critical of themselves, they believe everyone else is critical of them. And because they despise themselves, they assume everyone else dislikes them. Hypercritical, shaming parents

Because you feel shamed by the other person's comment, you may spend hours making the other person feel horrible about himself by dumping shame back ono him. "I'll show you. I'll make you feel like sh*t because that's what you think of me." Shame based people feel very vulnerable underneath all of
Any Length
Absolutely brilliant. I got the audio version first and even while listening to it I could see the merit of working through the book in detail. I have since ordered the print book for myself and for a dear friend who may also find it helpful. I can highly recommend this book. I am looking forward to all the exercises which I can see will be very helpful.
I will make a commitment to re-visit this book review when I am through the exercises to add my experience with them to it.
This is a good book written with compassion by someone who has 'been there' and so can offer insight from both an objective and personal perspective.
I am finding that reading self help books containing exercises and directions on how to live and behave is kind of challenging for me. One can only do so much inner work I suppose and then one needs a break and time to integrate practices. I think right now I am in the mood for more uplifting phrases and less "dig deep/chip away" exercises. I also want to dive into some work outside of me, and I think i've been focusing too much on my inner world lately which can be intense. Because of this, I d ...more
"the primary audience for this book is survivors of emotional abuse and neglect"
but I still learned many things:
how to talk with your body parts and thanks them
how to know your feeling and needs
I realized my mom was too busy to care about me enough

Exercise in this books are very practical and valuable.

I could not believe that I've read this book before. It is not practical at all and I am not the target reader of this book.
One of the best self help books I have read. It really deals with trying to undo damage done in stinky childhood settings. For me, it really hit home and was therapeutic. Great exercises, tough material, opened me up considerably.
Bravo! Thank You!!
Wrote the assignments down--amazing what the results were! Not what I thought, but good to know!
Self help for letting go of abusive or toxic childhood parental relationships and beginning to heal the self.
So far so good.
on location 55/2756
not actual page numbers cuz the kindle is dumb lol
I used it as a journaling workbook and found it very helpful.
Read a little bit of it. I would order it again.
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Beverly Engel has been a psychotherapist for thirty years, specializing in the areas of abuse recovery, relationships, women’s issues and sexuality. She is also the best-selling author of 20 self-help books, many of which have been featured on national television and radio programs (Oprah, CNN, Ricki Lake, Starting Over) as well as national print media (O Magazine, Cosmopolitan, Ladies Home Journa ...more
More about Beverly Engel...
The Emotionally Abused Woman: Overcoming Destructive Patterns and Reclaiming Yourself The Nice Girl Syndrome: Stop Being Manipulated and Abused -- And Start Standing Up for Yourself The Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Stop Being Abused and How to Stop Abusing Loving Him without Losing You: How to Stop Disappearing and Start Being Yourself - Seven Empowering Strategies for Better Relationships The Right to Innocence

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