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Songs for the New Depression

by Kergan Edwards-Stout (Goodreads Author)

4.53 of 5 stars 4.53 · rating details · 45 ratings · 28 reviews

Winner - 2012 INDIE BOOK AWARD - LGBTQ Category
Shortlist - 2011 INDIE LIT AWARD - LGBTQ Category

Gabriel Travers knows he's dying; he just can't prove it. Despite his doctor's proclamations to the contrary and rumors of a promising new HIV drug cocktail, all it takes is one glance into the mirror to tell Gabe everything he needs to know. His ass, once the talk of West Holly...more

Paperback, 252 pages

Published October 25th 2011 by Circumspect Press

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Songs for the New Depression by Kergan Edwards-Stout

Great Gay Fiction

5th out of 56 books — 57 voters

Best Gay Romance With Characters Who Are HIV+

29th out of 37 books — 58 voters

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Feb 01, 2013 deirdre rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: fiction, buddy-reads, personal-journey, auto-buy-author

4++ stars . . . maybe 5, still pondering . . .

powerful. gripping. a real tear jerker . . .

Gabe's story is told in 3 parts, in reverse chronological order. This is the genius of the author. It starts with Gabe's death. You cannot help but be drained by watching yet another young man succumb to AIDS. He is not necessarily the most lovable man on paper. But he feels real. A real man, real issues, real life. You love him despite all his flaws . . . don't we all want that???

The story is told first p...more 4++ stars . . . maybe 5, still pondering . . .

powerful. gripping. a real tear jerker . . .

Gabe's story is told in 3 parts, in reverse chronological order. This is the genius of the author. It starts with Gabe's death. You cannot help but be drained by watching yet another young man succumb to AIDS. He is not necessarily the most lovable man on paper. But he feels real. A real man, real issues, real life. You love him despite all his flaws . . . don't we all want that???

The story is told first person, the reader is listening to his thoughts as he comes to terms with his quickly impending death. Gabe is trying to make peace not just with his death, but also with how he lived his life. The book then moves to 10 years earlier as Gabe struggles to find love. The decisions he makes, the people he meets leave him forever changed. Still you are left broken for Gabe. His self worth, his vision for himself, his decisions, the what ifs . . . . Lastly, you are transported to Gabe in high school. He has come out of sorts. The interplay of people in his life in this phase leave a lasting imprint on both Gabe and the reader.

Gabe asks himself many questions along the way. I have never highlighted a book more EVER. One basic question remains . . .what if?? What if a couple of key decisions had been made differently? Would Gabe be facing the same fate??? Regret and redemption . . . love . . . I was left wondering if Gabe ever loved himself. Could he have??? I did feel he had a sense of peace . . .

When I finished the book, I immediately reread section 1. I was afraid I missed something, and I did!! NOT due to the author, but my own doing. Pay attention to the people in Gabe's life and those not there in section one . . . as the story moved in reverse, some players play larger roles later.

I described to another reader that this book started by throwing you off a cliff. Then, like a pendulum, it swings back and forth slowly in a calculated fashion until the end . . .complete with that last burst before utter exhaustion . . . (less)

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Jul 19, 2012 Jodi rated it 5 of 5 stars

This is an incredibly important book. I was raked over the coals with the raw emotion that Kergan Edwards-Stout creates in the telling of this story. You can feel the anguish of someone wanting, needing to be loved; and the pain one wishes to inflict, at their failure to find what they are looking for.

Kergan Edwards-Stout writes his debut novel ‘Songs for the New Depression’ with the experience of someone who has lost a partner to AIDS. Given his knowledge, his readers will come away shaken by t...more
This is an incredibly important book. I was raked over the coals with the raw emotion that Kergan Edwards-Stout creates in the telling of this story. You can feel the anguish of someone wanting, needing to be loved; and the pain one wishes to inflict, at their failure to find what they are looking for.

Kergan Edwards-Stout writes his debut novel ‘Songs for the New Depression’ with the experience of someone who has lost a partner to AIDS. Given his knowledge, his readers will come away shaken by the painful and often graphic memoir of Gabriel Travers; a fictional character, as he reflects on his life.

From his deathbed, Gabe tells his story broken down into three decades; 1995, as he comes to terms with his choices in life, the 1980s, when sex was his way of looking for love and AIDS became an ugly result of free love, back to his tumultuous youth in 1976, when he begins his journey with reckless abandon, through the gay scene after experiencing a broken heart.

Given that the book deals with such a difficult topic, Edwards-Stout manages to lighten the mood of what could be an oppressive book, by injecting humor and light-hearted moments. Regaling us with stories of Gabe’s relationships with his unlikely friend Clare; one of his only friends high school, his mother Grace, who is exploring her new found freedom and finally the man who becomes his partner guiding him through the final journey of his life.

Kergan Edwards-Stout is an award-winning director and author, whose work has appeared in a number of publications, including the Huffington Post, Bilerico Project, LGBTQ Nation, American Short Fiction and the health magazine SexVibe. He has been honored by the Human Rights Campaign as a “2011 Father of the Year”, and blogs regularly at http://kerganedwards-stout.com. He is currently at work on a memoir.

This book, Winner-2012 Next Generation Indie Book Award - LGBTQ
Shortlist - 2011 Independent Literary Award – LGBTQ, is one that everyone should read; in fact it should be mandatory. It is eye-opening to the struggles a gay person endures to be accepted in a judgemental society. The book is incredibly well-written, so much so that you can understand why Edwards-Stout has been published in many periodicals.

When you read ‘Songs for the New Depression’ be prepared with a box of Kleenex and a free schedule as you will be so engrossed you won’t want to be disturbed; the read is that good.

Disclaimer: 'Songs for the New Depression' was given to me by the author for an honest review. Thanks Kergan. xo(less)

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Feb 08, 2012 Ulysses Dietz rated it 5 of 5 stars

Kergan Edwards-Stout's first novel, "Songs for the New Depression" is the kind of book we need more of in the world of modern gay literature. For a man of my generation, reading about AIDS is difficult, because we lived through the epidemic as it first began to emerge on our collective radar, before we understood the horrific toll it would take on our lives and our community. There were a lot of these books in the 1990s, but we have begun to turn away from those dark topics in our literature, an...more

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Oct 21, 2012 Alan rated it 3 of 5 stars

This story compiles three snapshots in the life of Gabe, a gay man with a troubled soul, biting wit, and razor sharp tongue. Each snapshot—near death, middle age, young teen—focuses on his relationship with his love interest during that fragment of his life.

Gabe is a man who, because of a sexual-bullying incident during his early years, has built up strong, thick walls around his heart, and uses his cutting wit to keep people at a distance, even though he craves love and affection. Completely se...more

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Jun 06, 2012 Books-treasureortrash rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: drama, reviewed

Book Review: 2 Treasure Boxes

It is 1995 and Gabe has HIV, although he currently isn’t showing any symptoms, he knows he is going to die soon. This is his story, starting at the end and moving backwards through time. Gabe shares with us three monumental times during his life, starting in 1995 and moving backwards to 1976.
Songs for the New Depression is the debut novel by Kergan Edwards-Stout. It is a drama and falls under the genre of literary fiction as well as gay literature. The story is told...more Book Review: 2 Treasure Boxes

It is 1995 and Gabe has HIV, although he currently isn’t showing any symptoms, he knows he is going to die soon. This is his story, starting at the end and moving backwards through time. Gabe shares with us three monumental times during his life, starting in 1995 and moving backwards to 1976.
Songs for the New Depression is the debut novel by Kergan Edwards-Stout. It is a drama and falls under the genre of literary fiction as well as gay literature. The story is told in a first person narrative with the voice and thoughts of Gabriel Travers (Gabe). The story begins and ends in the present with a prologue and epilogue.

The story was written in an interesting manner, and we know from the beginning, or should I say the end, 1995, that something horrendous happened to Gabe that irrevocably changed him. It isn’t until the end, or should I say the beginning, 1976, that the reader finds out what happened. Each time period explored contains pivotal events in Gabe’s life. At each point Gabe faces a huge life changing event and how he chooses to react has repercussions that affect the rest of his life. Gabe is a complex character, sometimes endearing, sometimes cruel but always interesting.

This is a standalone story about one man’s journey through life. It is well written, but at times I was shocked at the explicit gay sex, although I understand that it played an important part of Gabe’s life and story. This book is not just for fans of gay literature, it is a sad and thought provoking story and I recommend Songs for the New Depression as a good read.

Favourite Quote:

“Maybe the next time you meet someone, try keeping your mouth shut and your brain in neutral. Ask questions. Find out everything you can about the other person. The more rounded they become, the less easy it will be to dismiss them.”

Questions to Ponder: The decisions that Gabe made in 1976 and again in 1986 had huge repercussions on the rest of his life. Do you think he could have made different decisions at either of these times? Why do you think he choose to do what he did?

For more of my reviews go to http://books-treasureortrash.com (less)

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Mar 12, 2012 David Hallman rated it 5 of 5 stars

The Duality of Time

Philosophers, physicists, and poets have drawn on a wide variety of metaphors to capture the essence of time, some of which are more successful than others.

At the personal level, we all have our own interpretations of the significance of the passage of time for us as individuals and as communities.

Two seemingly contradictory conclusions emerge – on the one hand, time seems to change everything, and yet on the other hand, immutable consistencies remain.

Kergan Edwards-Stout’s n...more

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Jan 16, 2012 Carey Parrish rated it 5 of 5 stars

It isn't often I read a book that touches my soul, but that is exactly what happened with Songs for the New Depression. Author Kergan Edwards-Stout has crafted a story that is beautiful, tragic, and consuming. Once you start this one, you won't be able to stop. And keep some tissues handy.

Meet Gabriel Travers. A man approaching 40, Gabe is ill with HIV and he thinks he's dying; no, he knows he's dying. Nobody believes him but he knows it. His life hasn't been everything he wanted it to be, but w...more It isn't often I read a book that touches my soul, but that is exactly what happened with Songs for the New Depression. Author Kergan Edwards-Stout has crafted a story that is beautiful, tragic, and consuming. Once you start this one, you won't be able to stop. And keep some tissues handy.

Meet Gabriel Travers. A man approaching 40, Gabe is ill with HIV and he thinks he's dying; no, he knows he's dying. Nobody believes him but he knows it. His life hasn't been everything he wanted it to be, but whose has, eh? The world he lived in back in the 80's is something he recalls fondly but which in the present day is a mere memory and a passel of regrets. He never found true love. He never became what he thought he wanted to be.

He lets his thoughts drift back to his high school days and the first love of his life, Keith. Keith was perhaps the only person who knew the potential Gabe possessed and it was with Keith, and only Keith, that Gabe shared the savagery of an attack that has left him scarred ever since.

Gabe's story is one of personal redemption. In what he believes to be the finality of his life, he at last sets out on the journey of self discovery that will hopefully rid him of his regrets and put to rest the bitterness of a past that he's never been able to shed.

Readers can delight in Gabe's journey because it is one that we all at some point in our lives, for whatever varying reasons, have to take. Maybe Gabe isn't the classic literary hero, he is a very flawed character in many respects, but no one is perfect, and anyone who reads this tale will relate to Gabe in a very personal manner. His love of Bette Midler, his reliance on the help of his mom's wife, a priest who loves country music, and his own remembrances of what he sees as a life half lived will open the door to the reality of what he actually is, was, and will become.

Kergan Edwards-Stout has written a masterpiece. A bravura debut novel, its heartfelt message is ultimately timeless.

Mr. Edwards-Stout, well done, sir. (less)

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Jun 08, 2012 C.M. Barrett rated it 5 of 5 stars

This book had me hooked from the first page. The writing quality was so strong that I had to look again to remind myself that this is a debut novel.

The writing is more than excellent; it's in places laugh-out-loud funny. It's my view that if one is going to write about serious and often heart-breaking subject, the relief of humor is essential. Otherwise, people will put down your book and go watch Modern Family.

I wasn't at first sure that the reverse-chronology storytelling method worked. Only t...more

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Jan 30, 2013 Peasblossom (Anna) rated it 4 of 5 stars

Recommended to Peasblossom (Anna) by: Deirdrel

Shelves: just-read-it

A difficult journey, but so worth it.

I found myself frustrated, bemused, and ultimately heartbroken by Gabe's story, told in three stages and in reverse chronological order. Gabe is harder on himself than any critic or reader would be, which seems to be the crux of his personal journey.

Edwards-Stout carefully feeds out information in such a way that the reader first becomes familiar with all of Gabe's flaws, and then slowly gives you the rest of the information you need to integrate his actions...more

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May 31, 2012 Steven rated it 4 of 5 stars

Once I got used to the fact that the main character in this was not easy to like or feel much sympathy for,it was a pretty cool read. The most tragic figure in the book was not himself or his parents; it was his psychotherapist. Where she would even start with a guy like this, I'm not sure. As presented,this character was constantly craving love, yet gave new meaning to the term "high maintenance." He also seemed awfully closed minded and "old", even at his youngest in the book. I found it a lit...more

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Aug 27, 2012 Rachel rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: favorites, free-reads

I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.

Genius. Amazing. Saddening. This book is all that.

I didn’t think I would have time to finish this book, but once I got started, I couldn’t put it down. I squeezed in reading time when I could and finished it within seven days.

The writing is a style unlike anything I have read before. There’s dark humor mixed in that had me laughing but feeling so depressed at the same time. The story is told backwards, from Gabe’s adulthood to high scho...more

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Jun 28, 2012 Ian rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: recommendations, books-i-loved-5-stars

There are so many ways you could consider this book gratifying. It is abundant in one mans struggle to live a life that from the beginning was doomed to sadness. Although the overall theme of the 250 plus page work by Kergan Edwards-Stout is about facing your own mortality it is the fleshed out protagonist of Gabe / Gabey that lends it's support the books reverse structure. This book is about story, character and internal dialogue, it's also about time and place and all play a modern anachronist...more

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Dec 02, 2011 Gregory Allen rated it 5 of 5 stars

This was an incredible World AIDS Day for me as I finished Kergan Edwards-Stout's moving debut novel that tackled the AIDS epidemic head-on by giving his readers a person to attach to this disease. Where Edwards-Stout excels so brilliantly is not turning his protagonist into a martyr. He has written a complex, flawed man (with a book peppered with enough humor to cut through the inevitable) that readers can identify with and not place on a pedestal to simply admire and revere. The book is told i...more

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Jan 25, 2012 Charla Wilson rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: psychology, fiction

This book touched me at the core of my being! It gives a real look at what life is like with AIDS. It is a story of love and devotion, and a self examination of a dying man. It takes you inside of Gabes head and as you read, you suffer along with him and sometimes you laugh. You will find that his concerns are the same as your own. I think that is why this story had such an emotional hold on me. I'm not just talking about the disease and the suffering because of it. I am talking about the path t...more

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Feb 18, 2012 Pamela rated it 5 of 5 stars

Kergan Edwards-Stout’s Songs for the New Depression pulled me in immediately with its honesty, humor, and intimacy. I opened the book thinking it would be something interesting to read over the course of the next couple of weeks and instead devoured it quickly. The author weaves in psychology, spirituality, trauma, life & death, and redemption all in the course of 252 beautifully written pages. The main character, Gabe, is flawed, but lovable. He is a believable character -- a human being, s...more

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Aug 25, 2012 Angie Lisle rated it 5 of 5 stars

We meet the main character, Gabe, at the end of his life, after he has contracted HIV and faces the imminent threat of death.

Gabe is flawed - he admits that but, as the story unfolds, it's revealed that he's neurotic and possibly suffering from (in my not so professional opinion) histrionic personality disorder. Because of this, he makes decisions that have a large impact on, not only himself, but everyone around him.

The events that shaped Gabe are slowly revealed with excellent foreshadowing...more

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Jul 24, 2012 Jeff Erno rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: gay-fiction

Gabe Travers wants to be a better person. He doesn’t want to be so judgmental of others. He wants to connect with his loved ones in a meaningful way, if only he could stop being so pretentious and shallow. On the one hand, he’s very proud of himself. He has culture and style, and he genuinely believes that “presentation counts.” He’s proud of how damned smart and quick-witted he is, and he cannot help but view others as being beneath him.

But he feels guilty, especially when he sees the goodness...more Gabe Travers wants to be a better person. He doesn’t want to be so judgmental of others. He wants to connect with his loved ones in a meaningful way, if only he could stop being so pretentious and shallow. On the one hand, he’s very proud of himself. He has culture and style, and he genuinely believes that “presentation counts.” He’s proud of how damned smart and quick-witted he is, and he cannot help but view others as being beneath him.

But he feels guilty, especially when he sees the goodness and sincerity within other people. Why can’t he be more like them? Why does he always judge people, think negatively of them? Why does he have to be so selfish and egotistical? He can’t seem to help himself, and throughout his posthumous autobiography, he contradicts himself repeatedly.

Throughout this story, I became frustrated with Gabe. I loved and hated him. He represented all the mean, pretentious people I’d ever met, and yet I connected with his struggle for self-improvement. I empathized with his feelings of self-loathing, his battle to conquer the demons associated with child sexual abuse, and his efforts to embrace his authenticity. In the end, I just felt sad.

Certainly the writing is superb. The wordsmithing is brilliant, and the vocabulary that the author uses makes it abundantly clear to readers that he’s a pretty educated guy. It seemed befitting the character for whom he was narrating. The problem I have with the book, though, is that although I have a great deal of compassion for Gabe, I just don’t like him very much.

The plot is presented in a non-linear format, beginning at the end and ending at the beginning. It is divided into three sections, the first being the last, and the last being the first. I wonder if I’d been able to read the story in chronological order, if I’d have been able to tolerate Gabe a little more. Perhaps this is the point. When we meet someone, we see them as they are with no thought of how they became the person they are. Once we see the big picture, it is easier to understand why an individual behaves the way they do.

It’s difficult to judge this story without delving into a psycho-analytical deconstruction of the main character…and even the secondary characters. Gabe’s parents, though they did the best they could, were in my view terribly misguided. His mother instilled within him the importance of image and presentation, and she’s perhaps the single force that established within him the core belief that self-worth is linked to refinement. This was a hard pill for me to swallow, being that my own core belief is that such attitudes are equivalent to snobbery.

Gabe tries to challenge these beliefs himself on multiple occasions. The most noteworthy of these is when he meets Pastor Sally, one of the story’s few endearing characters. Initially he regards her as a hick, someone beneath him, but then later feels guilty for judging her so quickly. He does the same with Jon, initially proud of the fact that he’s so much more worldly and intelligent than this common person. Eventually they fall in love, and Gabe realizes that Jon possesses every bit of the authenticity that Gabe has yearned to find within himself.

Yet in spite of all these self-revelations, Gabe never connects the dots. He never realizes that he’s spent his entire life trying to put others down in order to elevate himself. All he ever does is blame. He blames his parents for making mistakes that scarred him. He blames the kids who bullied him for making him into a whore. He blames Keith for rejecting him. He blames his therapist for being a fat, overpriced shyster who has milked him for money and provided no real benefit. And ultimately the only solace he ever finds to assuage the waves of self-loathing and guilt is his own materialism.

I am not sure if the author’s intent is to use subtlety to convey a larger, more altruistic message or if he is actually placing a stamp of approval on Gabe’s hedonistic view of life. Perhaps he is merely trying to show us that we all are flawed. After all, what I wanted most was for Gabe to just start loving himself. He really was intelligent. He really did have a good sense of humor. He really did have compassion for others and the ability to love unselfishly. Yet he was his own worst enemy. Because he couldn’t be perfect…and because “presentation counts”…he went to his grave believing himself to be an utter failure.

My biggest shortcoming as a reader (and literary critic) is that I want my happily-ever-after. I never found that in Gabe’s story. Although the writing pulled at my heartstrings and allowed me to feel those bitter-sweet emotions I so cherish, there was no resolution. There was nothing formulaic about this novel, and perhaps that is what has left me feeling so cheated. I acknowledge my own weakness in this regard. I have no doubt that this award-winning novel is worthy the praise that has been heaped upon it, but it is definitely not a feel-good read.

To be blunt, I feel emotionally as if I’ve been bludgeoned, and I wish my heart would stop breaking for this character who remains a little-too-real for my comfort level. In a word, I’d say the book was “haunting”. I guess it will have to be up to the individual reader to decide for themselves if this is a good thing or bad. It has certainly had an impact upon me.
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Nov 07, 2012 L.E.Olteano rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: blog-review, reviewed, received-for-review, favorites

Yes, that's right! One of those rare Bomy Award of Excellence read, standing tall and proud, but most of all, ridiculously good, and waving its freaking fabulous flag in all its glory. I think you can tell I'm running on high levels of excitement and general fangirlism, this novel was that good.

Now, while reading it, I felt that it would rank in my top 10 best reads of the year. After finishing it, I'm more inclined to say top 5. If we're talking area of subject and impact it had on me, the real...more Yes, that's right! One of those rare Bomy Award of Excellence read, standing tall and proud, but most of all, ridiculously good, and waving its freaking fabulous flag in all its glory. I think you can tell I'm running on high levels of excitement and general fangirlism, this novel was that good.

Now, while reading it, I felt that it would rank in my top 10 best reads of the year. After finishing it, I'm more inclined to say top 5. If we're talking area of subject and impact it had on me, the really relevant reference I can give you was one of my top 10 reads of 2011, Caregiver by Rick R. Reed. Since back then in 2011 I didn't have the Excellence mention worked out, Caregiver doesn't show up under it, but for me it's definitely a work of excellence. And this baby right here is right up there with it, I won't compare them but if you read one and like it, I think you should also give the other a try. But you really should read them both, asap if you haven't already. Just saying.

The first striking thing about Songs for the New Depression was the writing; upfront and poignant, it just hit me from the first few words. I was like, "mayday, mayday, bring a mountain of tissues, I foresee hysterical crying somewhere down this line". The main character, Gabriel Travers, has one of the most colorful, personal and ridiculously charming voices I can think of right now, though Jon was very strong as well and I enjoyed the voices of other characters in the novel, I won't lie, Gabe was by far my most loved.
All scenes were very vibrant and they had this way of wrapping themselves around me as I read, instant teleportation into the story, I felt with Gabe, loved with him, hurt with him, got my heart severely broken with him...and one other thing, that I won't tell you for fear of ruining your read. Sufficient to say it involved a lot sniffling, many, many tear-soaked tissues and a headache.
This is one of the very few books I've read where the backwards through time direction not only worked for me, but felt brilliant. The natural sense of time, the chronological order of events not flowing in the natural direction of past, present, future is one of my pet peeves and I often complain about it whenever we meet. But this time, it was just natural somehow, like I was remembering Gabe's life and living those memories, those moments with him.

One of my guiltiest literary pleasures is character focus, and in this novel I was delighted. First off, Gabe must be the funniest and most wickedly charming character I can think of right off the top of my head. I can never resist funny characters, and he had a sense of humor that just won me over like five seconds into the book. He was bold, smart, incredibly charismatic and despite his doubts on the matter, incredibly easy to love. Not the good guy, not the bad guy, a real person with deep and unadulterated feelings raging all over the spectrum from pure and beautiful love to carelessness and courage bordering on insanity. It's really hard for me to keep from spoiling the whole thing, but I'll just say this: I cried like a maniac when we left the Eiffel tower, I cried and couldn't quite reconcile the beauty of the moment and feeling in the Sacre Coeur moment with what it led to in retrospect - I just started crying again now writing this just remembering that. I'm not spoiling your read, but the Sacre Coeur moment and the leaving of the Eiffel tower were just... impossibly intense moments. Heartbreaking, beautiful yet devastating, I just can't truly put it into words, it was that exquisite and yet terrifying.
Jon was really lovely, I won't say he wasn't, and he had his moments when I just thought, ok, if these guys are for sale anywhere in the world, I want one, he just had that kind of selfless capacity to truly, deeply love someone, particularly my favorite character Gabe, it just floored me. It floored me to contemplate the devastation going rampant in the story, Jon's, Gabe's, and who knows how many other people's who went through something similar.

The story was very intriguing, especially since there were these events that you just felt it in your bones were incredibly relevant that you only got a clear picture on when reaching the end. It had the perfect pace of events for me, though in this case I'd rather talk about the pace of feelings. This is a literary work, so we're focusing on character, not agitated action (thank God!), and for me it was simply the perfect recipe to tell a story. I am going to be clear on this, this is not a happily ever after story. You might have noticed the ones I really, really love tend to have something of an unhappy if not devastating ending, right? This is not a happy ending book, it's not a doll-ified version of a love story. This, my friends, is a brutally clear and honest glimpse into a real life, with its moments of pure grace, with its devastation, with its unfair and frustrating ending - because I was boiling up inside, wanting to just scream "This is not fair!". Since that's my general reaction to life by large, I'll tell you that this story is one of those impossibly real, brutally real ones that will haunt you a long time after you've read them. And it should have the impact it will surely have on you, you shouldn't try to evade but embrace it. Because that's what we have to do with life, too, don't we? Despite its moments of complete horror and pain, despite its flagrant and blatant unfairness in places, regardless of those moments of pure unadulterated happiness and grace, for it all, we should open ourselves up and just accept and embrace it.

So, all in all, this book is a work of art. It won't be a hit and run, it won't fleet away after you've galloped through it, it won't leave you the way you were when you started the read. I was touched, moved, impressed and sort of shaken after reading this, and I'm still recovering now, 24 hours later, and you know what? That's what a book should be able to do for you. That's what art should be able to do for you, alter your soul once you've been touched by its magnificence.
I'm altered.

Butterfly-o-Meter Books (less)

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May 27, 2012 Indie Reviews rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: indie-reviews, fiction, lgbt, favorites

Kergan Edwards-Stout's debut novel, Songs for the New Depression, is the poignant and darkly humorous story of Gabriel Travers who is HIV positive and convinced that he’s dying despite his doctor’s proclamations to the contrary. His viral load is undetectable, his T-cell count is up, but according to Gabe one glance in the mirror tells him everything he needs to know. "His ass, once the talk of West Hollywood, now looks suspiciously like a Shar-Pei..." Faced with his own mortality, Gabriel’s fir...more

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Feb 09, 2012 Terrence rated it 5 of 5 stars

Fantastic read. There are no chapters. The story is told in three parts, in three different years, in three different decades in reverse chronology.

I did a Q&A with the author for my website and couldn't have been nicer and his answers are fantastic.

https://sites.google.com/site/theterr...

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Apr 14, 2012 Nancy Silk rated it 5 of 5 stars

This is a story that I shall never forget; the first part made me laugh, cry, and then sob in public. The second and third parts gripped me and traveled into my heart and mind. It's a reminder of the 80's and the horrible disease of AIDS. For so many trapped in this disease, they could see no future. Everyone needs to love and be loved, yet politics and bigotry make obscene jokes of those who are different. They are NOT different. Kergan Edwards-Stout is am amazing man, father, and author. His w...more

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Apr 01, 2012 Jeffrey Ballam rated it 5 of 5 stars

In Songs for the New Depression, Kergan Edwards-Stout takes us back to the days of the AIDS pandemic. We follow Gabriel Travers on his journey to find love and (self-) acceptance but we follow him in reverse beginning with the current third of Gabe’s life and then backwards to the first third just after coming out in high school. This is an emotionally engaging read, often difficult at parts especially for those who have watched a loved one being ravaged by an incurable illness. Yet, it is a mus...more

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Jul 08, 2012 Jeffrey Luscombe rated it 5 of 5 stars

What a great read! I was especially impressed with the structure of the novel and its interesting backward motion that (beginning in the 90s and moving back to the 70s) only a skilled writer could maneuver. The same is true of the first-person narration - which is made even more difficult by a (shall we say) often less than sympathetic - yet very true and honest protagonist. But Edwards-Stout handles it wonderfully.

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Feb 04, 2012 John rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: gay, fiction

A remarkable, thoughtful book, both desperately funny and desperately sad, though ultimately it's anything but hopeless. Certainly it treats the big issues: love, innocence, joy, bitterness and death, but does so with a poignancy and (for me) an accessibility that makes this book pack quite a wallop.

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Jan 30, 2012 Andi added it

Shelves: dnf

Did not finish.

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May 17, 2013 Damian Serbu rated it 3 of 5 stars

Interesting read that captures the 1990s well. There is an intensity to these tales about a rather average life that will haunt you as a reader, lingering in your mind and making you think. It is written in "backward" chronology. So as a historian, that was sometimes confusing and frustrating, and I didn't think added all that much to the story or revelations.

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Jan 04, 2013 Paul Wright rated it 5 of 5 stars

I'm amazed and in awe. This is not an easy or "fluffy" story, but it is masterfully told, emotional and most of all it is an important story.

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May 04, 2013 Idalmir Rodrigues marked it as to-read

Apr 23, 2013 PaperMoon marked it as to-read

Shelves: bought-to-be-read

Apr 21, 2013 Dan C. marked it as to-read

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About Kergan Edwards-Stout

Kergan Edwards-Stout is an award-winning director and author, whose debut novel, SONGS FOR THE NEW DEPRESSION, won the 2012 Next Generation Indie Book Award in the LGBTQ category and was shortlisted in the same category for the 2011 Indie Lit Awards. His work has appeared in a number of publications, including Huffington Post, Bilerico Project, LGBTQ Nation, American Short Fiction, and the health...more

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Quotes from Songs for the New Depr...

“...flaky, crisp, layered, and multi-textured. Which was me. Sweet and sour. Soft and crisp. I discovered that these varied elements, that for so long had seemed at odds, were actually complementary.” — 2 people liked it

“...I believe that God requires nothing of us. There is no entrance fee or requirement for participation. He is there already, inside each of us, if only we'd stop and listen.” — 2 people liked it

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