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They Eat Puppies, Don't They?

3.36 of 5 stars 3.36  ·  rating details  ·  1,352 ratings  ·  271 reviews
In an attempt to gain congressional approval for a top-secret weapons system, Washington lobbyist "Bird" McIntyre teams up with sexy, outspoken neocon Angel Templeton to pit the American public against the Chinese. When Bird fails to uncover an authentic reason to slander the nation, he and Angel put the Washington media machine to work, spreading a rumor that the Chinese ...more
Hardcover, 335 pages
Published May 8th 2012 by Twelve (first published January 1st 2012)
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"Well, as we say around here, an ounce of preemption is worth a pound of enriched uranium."
Angel Templeton, Institute for Continuing Conflict

Buckley's back with his usual gang of idiots - meaning Senators, pundits, and other Washington insiders.

It seems that we as a people are just not fearful enough. At least not fearful enough to fund a predator drone the size of the Spruce Goose. The solution? Whip this country into a frenzied fright and blame it on, oh, let's say...China.

And who do you call
I'm of the opinion that good comedy is harder to write than good tragedy. I probably can be convinced otherwise, but it's so easy to find acceptance with standard stupid tropes and sight gags that a writer has to work hard to go beyond and make something that will cause the reader to not just laugh, but want to read a sentence or a chapter again. Christopher Buckley has written one damn good comedy, Thank You For Smoking. That's one more than almost anyone else (including me) has written. But th ...more
As always with Chris Buckley, devilish good fun. Buckley is a master of the Washington baroque political farce - densely plotted, charmingly ridiculous, alarmingly possible. In this hysterical comic thriller, various and sundry are plotting the possible assassination of no less than the Dalai Lama - in order to goose demand for domestic military spending. Once you accept the outrageous premise, which I sorta hope is far-fetched, we are off and racing.

Buckley creates wonderfully believable scenar
Mal Warwick
Washington and Beijing Get What They Deserve in This Satirical Novel of Politics and Diplomacy

Put yourself into this picture (as you might if you were reading this book and identifying with its protagonist): Your name is Walter “Bird” McIntyre. You are the leading Washington lobbyist for Groepping-Sprunt, a major arms contractor for the Pentagon. A Senate committee is meeting to consider a huge appropriation for your latest weapons system — an ocean-liner-sized drone aircraft armed with every ma
I've been a fan of Christopher Buckley's earlier work but this one makes me question why. I'm hoping he just ran out of inspiration or mojo. I read more than half of this novel without laughing out loud once. A couple of semi-chuckles, at occasional lines like "Email is the new herpes; you can never get rid of it." Buckley's subject is U.S.-China relations, which should be funny, should be easy pickins for satire, but mostly what we get is Dalai Lama jokes--again, potentially fertile ground but, ...more
Clif Hostetler
Christopher Buckley's books are fun to read. They have little content that is of any socially redeeming value. However, it's amazing how much humor and satire he manages to pack into such a small space. It is my impression that every sentence in this book is intended to be humorous or ironic and perhaps sarcastic in a political sense. When I encounter a sentence that isn't funny I just assume that it's a situation where I'm too naive (i.e. clueless) to catch on.

The issue in this book is Sino-Am
I've admired Christopher Buckley's humorous short stories for years, having read a few when I used to subscribe to (and read) The New Yorker. It's been on my list to read one of his novels and I finally got around to that item this past week.

"They Eat Puppies, Don't They" is a brand of comic writing that is quite enjoyable for short bursts and sometimes longer stretches but ultimately, it didn't work for me over the length of several hundred pages. After the clever set up -- another of Buckley'
Martha Bullen
Jun 02, 2012 Martha Bullen rated it 4 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: fans of good writing, political satire and humor books
I highly recommend this entertaining, timely novel by top-notch political satirist Christopher Buckley. The book involves a secret plot to stir up American public feeling against China so a defense company can sell more high-tech weapons to the U.S. government - that explains the inflammatory title, "The Eat Puppies, Don't they?"

This plot also involves the fate of the Dalai Lama, bunch of Confederate Civil War re-enactors and a terrifying Ann Coulter-esque figure called Angel Templeton. a war-m
The clever Mr. Buckley is back with another one of his satiric novels, this one dealing with the hawks in the defense industry and their desire to scapegoat China. But, as often happens with satire, this work descends into mockery at more than one point and it hurts the humorous passages. At one section he seems to forget he's writing a novel and spends several paragraphs explaining a bit of coinage, as if you're reading one of his Daily Beast columns. And when he does elicit emotions in his cha ...more
This book had some hilarious moments. The novel that Bird is working on, for example, is truly, truly awful. I cannot tell you how much I looked forward to the excerpts. How often do you get a character with a name like Rex "Stud" Something.

I found the parts with the wife (Mitzi) somewhat tiring, and more than a little predictable. In short, I felt the same way at the end of this book that I felt at the end of the original "Total Recall". Which may or may not be a spoiler.

I thought I saw where t
Adam Levin
A slightly cliché but fun read, Buckley's novel details the exploits of Bird, a defense lobbyist, and Angel, more or less an analogue for Ann Coulter, as they attempt to drum up enough anti-China sentiment to justify appropriating more money to a secretive new weapons system. Unfortunately, Bird, his wife Myndi, and Angel don't come across as particularly endearing: They're all pretty slimy people, and the humor value never really manages to compensate for this.
Where the book really shines is
It took me some time to get to this review after finishing the book, partly because I wasn't sure what to say about it. When viewing it as satire, it wasn't as successful as the other Buckley book I've read, the hilarious Boomsday. They Eat Dogs... is funny, and exaggerated, and definitely somewhat satirical. But the I opened the book back to the beginning where, before the actual book begins, Buckley lists "The Players". This inspired me to rethink the entire story as a farce, and it works much ...more
Very funny book! It was farfetched and hilarious but grounded by reality which is actually a little scary. My only criticism is the ending felt a bit abrupt. This was my first Christopher Buckley Book and I will definitely be reading others when I am in the mood for a laugh.
Maybe it was my aversion to the family last name, but I'd never read anything by the Christopher of the tribe, despite being aware that he wrote the novel upon which was based the delicious Washington satirical film, 'Thank you for Smoking,' Jason Reitman's debut. On a lark I picked up three audio versions of Buckley's novels, and have thoroughly enjoyed them -- perfect auto audio -- with laugh-out-loud one-liners and diabolical skewerings of all manner of pompous and preposterous character type ...more
Michael Plunkett
I never know what the 'proper' way to review books is, but I'd say this book was pretty enjoyable. It was offensive, funny, clever, and everything I'd want in a book that could be dubbed as 'political-satire.' I imagine one has to take the political and social situations in this book with a few grains of salt, but it was refreshing/terrifying that most politics are dealt with in the same way that people deal with everyday situations.

I can't really find myself having much motivation to write an
This book was so freaking funny and kind of scary because it is totally believable. There's not really much I can say about it other than that.
It had been a while between sharp witted political satires for Christopher Buckley. Blame it on the irrational expectations after the film release of Thanking you for Smoking, or the general difficulty in satirizing Barack Obama without verging into "SOCIALIST HITLER" quackery, but it's good to have him back.

His latest adventure in the annals of ethically questionable PR protagonists tracks a defense industry lobbyist charged with whipping up anti-Chinese sentiment in America. Once we have an en
Highly entertaining and easy to read.
They Eat Puppies, Don't They? by Christopher Buckley
Another Christoper Buckley satirical novel. In this one, Washington lobbyist, spin doctor and all-around sleazy dude "Bird" McIntyre has been tasked with creating anti-Chinese sentiment in order to increase the defense budget and therefore benefit a weapons manufacturer. To do this, he teams up with a Angel Templeton, who has a sharp brain, long legs and no morals. Together, they create a rumor that the Chinese have poisoned the Dalai lama, and
The title should give a clue to the content of this humorous satire of military industrial complexities and U.S.-China relations. Flat characters based on stereotypical assumptions reign in evermore cleverly constructed dialog. For Buckley, everything is fair game for a shoot-down; from the Chinese Standing Committee to names with nutty nuance; from the American public’s trending to idolatry [in this case of the Dalai Lama] to national security methods on both sides of the Pacific. Marketing mog ...more
Leah Lucci
I wound up quitting this book in 100 pages because the characters were corrupt and the book wasn't funny enough to make up for it.

This story's about a military supply company who hires a man to rustle up anti-China sentiment. This sentiment would, theoretically, result in Americans feeling threatened by China and bulking up their militaries, putting money in the military supply company's pocket.

The protagonist hires an unstable hot genius lady to do most of his work for him, and spends a fair a
THEY EAT PUPPIES, DON’T THEY? (2012). Christopher Buckley. ****.
Here is Buckley’s latest foray into political and social satire. This time, he addresses the potential conflict between the U.S. and China. He backs into the story through the medium of lobbyists for the military-industrial complex. “Bird” MacIntyre, a wealthy lobbyist for the weapons industry has failed to convince Congress to support a new doomsday weapon. He is let go by his employer, but set up as the head of a bogus foundation
Alex Nagler
I like Christopher Buckley. "Thank You For Smoking" is fantastic, "Supreme Courtship" never fails to crack a smile, and "Boomsday" is a few years from happening. "They Eat Puppies, Don't They" suffered from the fact that it didn't focus solely on the domestic front. Buckley knows what he's doing when it comes to the domestic realm. You can't be William F. Buckley's son and not know how to write in the domestic realm. He strays here, writing about China to give the other half of the story as it u ...more
This is incredible satire. The book is hilarious, insane, and frightening as when I read it I thought – this could actually happen. A Washington lobbyist is hired to create anti-Chinese sentiment among the American public to help a company working on a top secret weapon system gain congressional approval. When the Dalai Lama is hospitalized, this lobbyist sees his chance to start a rumor that will gain unfavorable media coverage of China. Things unwind from there. A maddening comedy of errors.

E. Newby
This was an entertaining read about lobbyists pushing for war with China, and the world of spin politics. I thought the characters had some pretty witty comments, and the dialogue was crisp. This humorous take on a matter that is in fact not funny was well researched and, for the most part, well handled. The characters suggested a diverse, colorful cast: the lobbyist who wants to be the next Tom Clancy, the manic Anne Cortier-esque single mom who shares a valium with her eight year old son every ...more
D.L. Morrese
A major defense corporation is having trouble getting Congress to approve funding for a weapon system it wants to sell to the military. The corporation’s CEO decides he needs to drum up public support so that the politicians in the finance committee will see funding the thing as a good political move. To get that support, he will need the public to perceive a threat, so he tasks one of his well-paid lobbyists to stir up some ‘anti-China sentiment.’
This book is a farce of international politics,
It’s not only obvious but unfair to say that Christopher Buckley is no Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. In fact, he’s not even the sublimely weird and funny Christopher Moore. This book-length satire is laborious, obvious and intent on winning nothing more than the brief chuckle. I suspect that novels like this and others of his that didn’t much impress me--like SUPREME COURTSHIP and FLORENCE OF ARABIA (THANK YOU FOR SMOKING produced a good movie, at least!)--will have, in the timescale of Literature, the rel ...more
hmm, well, it's as if the eViL lobbyists in Thank You for Smoking grew a bit older and decided to see what they could do toward fomenting a war with the Chinese.

in fact, it's a lot like that.

Buckley's always funny, so if you're in the mood for some funny, go for it. but somehow the funny has worn thin over the years. i remember spitting beer thru my nose reading Thank You for Smoking. but this book? maybe it's just become too real.

Bird, our protagonist, works as a lobbyist for a defense contract

They Eat Puppies, Don't They? is a satirical novel about the power of the military-industrial congress, its lead character undertaking a mission to pose as a lobbyist to whip up anti-China sentiment among Americans. In the view of the defense contractors, Americans are far too complacent about the old 'Red Menace': they aren't supporting measures like dandy new blow-`em-up drones, or the mysterious Taurus Program. To do this, their agent -- Bird McIntire -- teams up with an Ann Coulter expy, a w
Bird McIntire, a lobbyist for a defense contractor, sets up a foundation on Asia for the sole purpose of whipping up anti-China sentiment so Congress will fund his client's 757-size superdrone, "Dumbo."

He joins forces with the attractive but ascerbic Angel Templeton, a neoconservative commentator with the Institute for Continuing Conflict. They realize the only thing about China that Americans care about is the Dalai Lama, so they start a rumor that the Chinese intelligence agency has poisoned h
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Christopher Buckley graduated cum laude from Yale University in 1976. He shipped out in the Merchant Marine and at age 24 became managing editor of Esquire magazine. At age 29, he became chief speechwriter to the Vice President of the United States, George H.W. Bush. Since 1989 he has been founder and editor-in-chief of Forbes Life magazine.

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the Good
More about Christopher Buckley...
Thank You for Smoking Boomsday Supreme Courtship No Way to Treat a First Lady Little Green Men

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